sandyv

Hey never mind Deserted1, I can totally relate! I won't talk to my friends or anyone for that matter anymore about THE RELATIONSHIP that went bad, but I tend to relapse very often, I understand exactly how you feel. Too bad we can't fast forward the baggage from our hearts as much as we would like too..........

Yeah ceeboogi it all takes times unfortunately, thats what I'm dealing with now and babybear seems to be in the same situation. Still think of him no matter whom I'm with, and I'm afraid other people can see that, that why I chose to be alone tonight...... yikes I gotta get back in the saddle.....

Hey Deserted1, ya know me too... the guys that come around... wanna dance, flirt... I know this is normal, but I wanna slap them when they even touch me... so right now guess I'm better off alone.. I'm lonely sometimes even with a crowd around me, strange how that is, isn't it?

Thnx Annie, gonna try to get happier, you know after almost 2 months I should be better, gotta work on it still I guess...... I appreciate feedback from everyone here.....

Don't fall for that stuff, hey Babybear, this guy sure sounds like my ex Jack. And he I believe may be a narcisist, (totally into himself) and doesn't give, (forgive the expression) Jack sh*t about you or anyone else..... I know this whole scenario is very much what I have been dealing with. Also he wants to be with you (no disrepect intended) as my ex bf Jack does... to get his rocks off, sorry but it is as simple as that...... god men are pigs... but then again pigs don't drink beer do they? Sorry I'm angry, just venting... but these guys don't even stop to think about how they are hurting us.... its all about them isn't it???

Yeah I actually have two of his friends (so-called anyway) hitting on me... I hate men right now (no not interested in woman tho, lol) but as much of a rat as he is, stupid me, still love and miss him, probably just like you miss you ex right?

Well he drifted me for his ex (mother of his three children) but I hear through mutual friends he told her to "hit the bricks" and it didn't obviously work out. I don't wanna be second runner up to anyone.... Yeah he lives 3 blocks away and goes to the grocery store near my place.

Same here Babybear, sleep is my escape as well.....

Hey no, He walked by my place, I was putting out some garbage, I ran in an shut the door....

Yeah I do understand how you feel, but you sound like me... I want him back too... but when you think about would it work again.... probably not.. we gotta move on, and if something happens in the meantime fine... but you just can't depend on that, stick around I need support just like you do, one way or another ...

Hi, haven't made any recent posts, but I'm lost right now... need to at least vent I suppose..... I am alone tonight, I do have alot of friends, but have chosen to seclude myself because I'm feeling very down again... was feeling better... but not tonight...... for some unknown reason I'm back... way back... don't know why... just missing him.... major relapse.... I can't watch tv, or even a DVD movie, sipping on beers, what the hell is wrong with me. don't wanna feel what I'm feeling. Wondering what he is doing and if he is even thinking about me... he walked by my place yesterday and waved when he went by. I shut the door. I know he saw this, but I cou'ldn't help myself, he hurt me soo much. I guess thats probably what set me back. Anyone else feeling lonely tonight?

Yeah, I hope and pray she is pulling through this........ Hey Miss888 if you are out there, drop us all a line ok? Sandy

I also felt that horrible heaviness in my chest, but its much better (altho still there sometimes), and I wonder how he could just stop caring in a New York minute, but he did, and I can't change that apparently, as much as I wish I could.... but guess what ... he hasn't forgotten you, I found out my ex hasn't about a week ago.... things didn't work with the witch he ran away with and now mutual friends are saying that he misses me.... A couple of weeks ago I would have broke NC hearing this, but not now.... I'm stronger and I'm guarding my heart, he won't get to me that easily, it would take alot for me to even consider forgiving him..... So what I'm saying is repetetive, but keep putting one foot in front of the other, and keep going, you WILL get through this......

Hey Miss888, I've been in the same situation as you, just devasted, but recovering after about 7 weeks. Took time off work, didn't care... just like you... To get to the point, I got called into the Manager's office last week... and they "are concerned about my work performance".... yikes... never had that problem before.... Miss I know how much your hurtin... but you've gotta take care of you first.. you need that job right.. know I do, but having said that I know about the not caring anymore feeling too... don't let that other girl win... she'd probably be glad to hear you got fired! Do the basic things you gotta do.. I know its tough but in the end you will feel better about you.. and thats what counts! Hugs Sandy

Aww Lonesoul I hear ya, I'm going through much the same sadness, its so hard to let go...... but we will... we have too right? I keeps getting info from mutual friends about how my ex Jack misses me.... but I won't even think about that at this point, he's totally devasted me.. will not go back... no never, ever

Yeah the feelings do change.... I'm feeling alot different than 6 weeks ago... I hear my ex Jack is missing me, he's even sent mutual friends with this message... I'm still not going to bite... nope... no way

Cingar, you will be ok, god i do know how painful this all is...... but take care of yourself right now, get through the night.... and know alot of us feel the same.... me too, hurting... Fridays were always with my ex bf.. a couple of days will help... take care

Yeah sometimes a good laugh makes things more bearable don't yea think?

5 Surefire Ways To Get Over Your Ex By Timothy Ward Hi this actually made me laugh which is a rare thing .....funny article I came accross hope no one finds it offensive After mountains of letters, tons of emails, and numerous phone calls at 2 a.m. that consisted solely of sobs and sniffles, I have decided to address the issues of breaking up with and getting over ex-lovers. Technically, I am probably not the best person to write this article seeing as I haven't been in a serious relationship since 1999 and even that one involved a stripper, but then again maybe that makes me the perfect person to write this article. I, humor writer and former Eva Longoria stalker, am not blinded by the intense light of true love and thereforeeee I can objectively present: 5 Surefire Ways To Get Over Your Ex! 1. Eat More One of the best ways to get over an ex-mate and get back into your old swing of things is by going on a week long eating binge. Time and time again I have seen men and women alike taking advantage of the mind-numbing, body-fattening coping method and I have yet to see one of them die from a broken heart thereafter. A few of them have suffered strokes and massive heart attacks or have gotten so fat that they had to be removed from their kitchen via crane but that's a small price to pay to completely forget about a lost soulmate. 2. Bore Everyone Around You With The Details Another great way to cope with a painful breakup is to repeated tell all your close friends and relatives about (a) how great the relationship was going (b) all the things you did for your ex © how much you hate him/her now and (d) that'll you never love again. Be sure to make these the sole topics of your conversation for at least the next two months. Whenever your mouth is moving the words coming out should be about your ex. The beauty of this method is that by the 3rd week after your breakup your friends will have gotten so tired of hearing you drone on and on that they will probably band together and beat the tar out of you with one of those old photo albums that you insist on showing them pictures of'the good ole days' out of. The upside to this is that while you are recuperating in the ICU you will have much more important things to worry about than old flames. Like the position of your bedpan... 3. Hard Drugs and/or Drinking There's nothing like an unbeatable addiction to take your mind off the fact that the first girl that you ever loved just left you for a high school janitor. I recommend starting out with cheap beer since it can be picked up at any convinence store and it makes your clothes and breath smell great. Then as your addiction increases and your confidence grows you can move on to your harder liquors and drugs. By the time you become a hardcore crack addict you will be so busy performing sexual favors on the side of the road for your next hit that you won't ever think about your ex. Unless you happened to wander pass his/her house and you start to wonder if there is anything portable inside that you can steal and take to the dope man to trade for more of your 'medicine'. For the most part, however, you'll live in a cloudy haze of drugs, booze, jail, homelessness, and disease that leaves little time for such trivialities as relationships. 4. Suicide One of the quickest ways to get someone off your mind is to totally clear your mind of everything. Suicide does a great job of accomplishing this for you. I promise you that if you stick a shotgun in your mouth and pull the trigger not only will you never think about your ex again but any other negative thoughts you've ever had will be erased as well. Of course, as with all things, there are some drawbacks like loss of life and eternal damnation but who can say what is too high a price to pay to forget about the 'man of your dreams' leaving you for your mother. 5. Find Another Mate Quickly If the loss of a mate has you down then the logical thing to do is find another mate. And this time you don't have to be so picky. So what if he's 3 feet tall and reeks of codfish, let him take you out. Big deal if she's missing every other tooth in her mouth and has a face that makes the dead cringe, ask her out. Your goal isn't love, you tried that before and failed miserably, now you're just in it for companionship and new memories to crowd out the old painful ones.So find the first available male, female, household appliance, etc. that shows an interest in you and go for it. What have you got to lose? So there you have it folks, Five kid tested and mother approved methods for getting over a nasty breakup. Hopefully, none of my readers will experience a nasty breakup any time soon but if you do now you can face it bravely knowing that you have the proper methods for dealing with the situation. And now you'll have to excuse me, I have a date with my toaster...

Lonleymantonight: Yeah I think of what your saying often. In my case my ex just drifted away without even dumping me (I later found out he had been with his ex of 3 years ago), they have recently ended that again........ I have heard through mutual friends, Jack my ex bf is upset because one of his friends has been hanging out with me (I'm not interested).. still luv Jack, and I've been on NC for about 5 weeks. He is a strange guy (artist type) and I don't believe it would be easy at all for him to contact me... he is going to be wondering if I'm even going to be receptive to him I would think.... wouldn't he? I have seen him a couple of weeks ago in the bar and he tried to do the eye contact thing.... but I could not look him in the eye at all... still alot of hurt, but I feel he's going through the same thing quite likely. I'm sure he thinks I hate him, but I'm actually past that point..... Can't be easy for the dumper to know what to do, if anything at all.

Confused70, this guy doesn't work, he's on assistance, so its nothing like that .... unfortunately......

And bye the way, I've totally lost my sex drive..... jeez all this stuff kills it for sure ;(

Thnx you guys, I'm calming down a bit..... but still afraid.... thnx for caring.... feel so alone and scared... love yahs Sandy

Hi I've been posting for a few weeks following the breakup with my ex bf, well there seems to be yet another fly in the ointment...... he was going through drug testing because he's lost his children (custody) to the Children's Aide..... and he accidently left a card here, (I did ask him about a month ago) what the "canterbury clinic" was and he said it was where he went to be tested for any kind of drug abuse, bc thats what was ordered by the Courts...... I got curious today, googled this clinic and found it is and HIV/AIDS clinic and now I'm totally freaked out.... don't wanna talk to him though, and I can't go for testing until 13 weeks after contact, which won't be until end of December..... OMG I'm so afraid....... and how could anyone do that to another human being?????????? Why did he lie, and is this a death sentence? So afraid, not just only heartbroken anymore....

Yeah this is the one place I come that actually stops me from breaking NC, sad but I see others mistakes and it kinda helps me from wavering......... Thnx to everyone for being so supportive, it really helps!