steff

thank you all for your support, it means so much to me, i know now that i will be able to get through this.... thanks

i understand where your coming from.... my first heart brake was when i was 16, but anyway, there is no one thing that works for everyone, and sorry to say but the only thing is time... if u try and just be with another guy, ur just covering your feelings, and trust me it wont work, what you should try and do, is write down what you feel, when u saw him, how u felt... what made u happy today, what happened with your friends, just things of ur emotions, and well.... it wont make it all better in a day, but u have to get your feelings out and express them somehow... hope u feel better soon... i know the feeling when ur heart drops to the bottom of ur soul and it wont move...

last night, i took a giant step, and told my mum that I've had suicidal thoughts. we had a long discussion, and i red her my journal where I had talked about killing my self, and how I felt about it… she cried, and I cried, but she told me that she always feared that I would have those thoughts, she didn't know why, but she had a feeling because of things that I have gone through, that I would have them. But anyway, she told me shes going to get me some help, and that shes going to be with me the whole way. I wanted to tell you guys, because I know there are a lot of people in the same situation as me, and I want them to know that they can get through it.

ok... heres the problem, my dad is looking for work in sydney Australia, and London UK, at the moment i live in Melbourne Australia, and i have for 18 years now... but the thing is, i find it really hard to cope with that either next year, my parents including my dog and cat will be moving away, my family homes (that i have lived in for 18 years) will be sold, and i will be told to move out and find my own accodation, or, i move with them, and i dont want to leave my friends, and for those who know me, i dont want to leave james. i dont know what to do, i spoke to james just a while ago, and his just like, get over it.... i need help, i need to talk to someone about this, and james just isnt caring, he doesnt understand how it makes me feel that i might become completely alone... can someone tell me what i should do, move or stay, and if i stay how do i go about supporting myself, keeping in mind i cant get government assistance as my family has to much.... im scared... and feel alone

alittle while ago, i told you guys that i was having trouble with motivation and getting through VCE and everything. Well today i went to the RMIT open day in Melbourne, and i found out some information that has now given me hope in what i can do, and a direction as to where i am going. im doing a psychology social science course through a youth work tafe course... so i just wanted to thank everyone who had been helping me thanks heaps

ive only slept with one guy, so im not that experienced, however i found that my parenter wasnt that good, well, i didnt climax any of the times. he refused to go down on me, saying that i taste bad, which was rather upsetting, not that i would like him to go down, but he did once and i didnt like it, but he said he never would again because of the taste (turned out he wasnt a nice guy anyway) anyway, i went down on him when i had a cold so i didnt taste anything really which was good.. but when the cold cleared... nah, it isnt nice. but there are things to help, try flavoured lub, or sprays they help... so ive heard.

i dont know when i first tried it... properly around the age of 15, and im nearly 18 at the moment and i still cant organism... i just dont know what im doing.... so i dont really do it any more.

ok, im in year 12, and im doing my VCE which is the Victorian Certificate of Education.... its like the HSC or something.... anyway, in feb this year, my grandfather died suddenly, i was called out of school one afternoon and the next morning my mother woke me up telling me he had died. it devistated me for a long time, and caused great problems at school with friends, as i just didnt have interests in being around them. during this time, my last remaining grandparent was diagnosed with terminal cancer, and was given 3 months to live, also my father lost his job. so as u can guess i went through a lot of emotions, while trying to do my best for yr 12. my friends pretty much left me, and told me that if i ever have problems just dont tell anyone... now i know i posted a letter before saying james my best mate is the nicest guy and has always been there for me, well at this point of time, he wasnt... anyway, the thing is i lost motivation to do homework, i lost motivation to see friends, to make an effort to look nice when going down the street, to get out of bed or anything, ive been to the doctors they say i dont have depression, so its not that... but anyway, i need help to get me back on track before i competely ruin my life by not doing well with my vce... its important that i do well as my parents have spent over $50,000 for my education... i have to do well... there is no question about it... please help me be motivated... help me make it through the year, i had thoughts of killing myself, they were that bad, that after making attempts of my life and still waking up i felt like s*** i couldnt believe that i was alive and i still wanted to die. i did talk to the school theropest, but it did nothing.... please help.

hey, well ive done both, and i find that yoga doesnt do much for me, i dont know if it is because i dont like it, or whether it just doesnt work for me, yet i find pilates works so much better, it makes me feel as though i have actaully done something, as though my body is happier, and i have found that i have lost weight and toned up from doing pilates. hope that helps

maybe i should explain a bit more.... his a fantastic guy, to tell you the truth, i often feel like i love him, i know u properly think that because im only 17 nearly 18, that i dont know what love is, but trust me i do, he makes me feel amasing, he makes me so happy, i always think of him, i always want to be with him... but anyway thats not the point. i dont care if his gay, i love him either way. his so submissive (sp) to his other friend, he would do anything for him, they work at the same place, they tried to get in all the same classes, they stay behind after school to do 'homework' together, u cant separate them from each other, and well it doesnt concern me, but i just wish that i knew what was happening, whether they are gay together. i mean travis, his best mate, hates gays, says he doesnt like them... but i dont believe him, james... my friend, is just.... well... i dont think he really cares. james says he wants a family, and he talks about things he would do with his wife... but i just feel his covering things up. both are paranoid about the way that they look, travis has to be in charge with everything that is being done, (which my father tells me is a thing that gays like doing) please dont get me wrong, i have nothing wrong with gays, i would love james no matter what, gay or not... i plan on telling him my feelings on my wedding day, i believe i will always love him, but never be able to get him. james has done alot for me... he has always been there for me no matter what... im just so confused... please help me.

Hey, I think my best friend is gay, this is going to sound really weird, but like, he never has had a girlfriend, he never has done anything, i can sometimes touch him... not like sexaully touch him (by the way im female) his other best mate is a male, they do everything together, they will go to movies out to dinner shopping together, but with no one else, last night we had a birthday, and they both turned up they shared their meals, and were sitting rather close, and they just looked like they were a couple. Many people think that his is gay, but he always denies it, when looking at my girly magz, sometimes he will say a lady in there is pretty, but most of the time, he just doesnt even look at them, but looks at the males more... Sometimes i think he likes me, and other times i think he likes his other best mate (the male one) im really confused, i dont know what to do... i cant confront him because then he wont trust me anymore.... please help... is he gay....??? what do i do????