Dre_7
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Everything posted by Dre_7
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I was attracted to a bartender once, but maybe it's because I got the sense that she found me attractive and I got a free drink
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its sad, but it's prolly true. I think part of it is that guys are scared to show their emotions and "true" self so they put on that front in order to forcefully create a persona that would hopefully attract the opposite sex. lol everytime i think about it, it seems really really desperate It's desperate, but the majority rules I guess lol. As for me, I try to be myself all the time, because there's nothing more rewarding than someone whether in terms of love or friendship liking you for who you are. Sometimes, you just gotta move to the beat of your own drum
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Good post Jordan, "nice guy" is a very general term. As a matter of fact, I think true nice guys don't even get stuck with that label, people who come accross them labels them as awesome or amazing guys. I think you can only really judge someone by who they are behind closed doors..i.e when they're with family, when they're with a friend, basically when they take off the "mask." Out in public, most people are generally friendly, and hospitable. But how many people would give money to the homeless when they're alone? How many people would hold doors for the elderly? Little things like that are a true measure of character. The nice guy-jerk debate is pointless...because "nice" girls get "nice" guys. The remnants of the population bicker over the superficial things. Perhaps the problem is that the so-called "remnant" makes up the majority of this generation.
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You have to know what's best for you. If you like a girl for all the right reasons, but your friends don't like her...then maybe they weren't your friends in the first place. But as mysteryman said, if they know something about her that would hurt you, take note of their advice. I've learnt one thing though, if you let people change you, they will. I mean let's say you like this girl, she likes you, don't let any external influences rob you of that. Be true to yourself first and foremost, then see what your friends have to say. Make them back up their dislike for her with solid reasoning. Otherwise, find some new friends.
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Questions for the guys: How is a gorgeous girl different?
Dre_7 replied to Miss M's topic in Dating Advice
Thanks Jordan, I'm glad you're also able to realize that beauty is consists of many different compartments. If alot of people realized what you do...there would be many more meaningful and long lasting relationships. -
Hey guys, I was at work last week, and this girl and I made eye contact. The same thing happened several times. Then one of my friends came in and sat next to her, and she asked my friend where I'm from. Then my friend told me that the girl asked and I was like "oh" "...Tell her I'm from.." then my friend stopped me and said "I already told her where you're from" lol. I was trying to think of something funny to say. That didn't work out anyway. So then I made a comment to the girl, I don't remember what it was but she smiled, and I smiled back at her. Then throughout the day, the eye contact continued, and whenever I was smiling at something my friend said, I'd glance over at the girl smiling, and often she'd be smiling back at me. I even saw her from the corner of my eye looking when she thought I couldn't see her. At the end of our shift, we passed by each other..she didn't look at me. Then when I was leaving, she was in the hall I said bye to her...she was looking away from me and didn't say anything. Then tonight, she was sitting next to one of her friends, then I saw her friend looking at me a couple times, as if something had been said about me. I didn't say anything to her, or even look at her tonight. Except once in the elevator, I was messing around with my cell phone, and I looked up and saw her looking at me, with something that looked like a semi-smile, then she turned away lol. Now, the obvious question is..does she like me? or is she playing games? Or perhaps, she finds me attractive and that's it. I've sorta decided that it really doesn't matter, she's a bit younger than I'd like to go for..she's 18. But opinions are welcome, as I'd welcome the learning experience.
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I've found that I don't develop crushes as easily as I used to, and when I do...it's not the same feeling that I'd die or something if I didn't get to have a relationship with this person. I think there are alot of messed up people out there, as well as alot of good people. Until you can determine who the person really is, a strong physical attraction on it's own is really meaningless. Of course 2-3 years ago, I didn't know this lol.
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Questions for the guys: How is a gorgeous girl different?
Dre_7 replied to Miss M's topic in Dating Advice
Hey Miss M, I'm glad I encourage you in that way As for finding someone who will look inward, I think it takes one of two things to change a person, maturity or a dose of reality. I think people who have had a bad experience with a "gorgeous" girl natrually begin to see that not all that giltters is gold. When I think about it, I think the downfall of society is being obsessed with superficial things, which is what we are all targeting in so many words in this thread. I strongly believe that there comes a point in life where we all realize that all we really have is the truth in what we say, and the strength of our character. For some people, it comes later on in life, for others..it may come earlier. At that same time, we realize we can only judge others by the same criteria. Miss M, from reading your posts, I can tell that you're a smart girl and you know what you want in a husband/boyfriend. And I'll tell you right now that those two qualities will save you alot of time and heartache in life. I hope you get what you really want. : ) -
Questions for the guys: How is a gorgeous girl different?
Dre_7 replied to Miss M's topic in Dating Advice
I just wanted to add my 2 cents...As I grow older, I've realized that I don't fall head over heels for girls anymore based on looks. Like just 2 years ago, I might've fallen "in love" based on a girl's appearance. Soon I came to understand that the content of a person's character is more valuable than diamonds, if they're a good person at heart. Of course I like pretty girls, and we all have our own definitions of pretty, good looking etc. But beyond that, beyond the clothes, the makeup, the outward appearance etc...there is the real person. What's on the inside of a person can make them beautiful on the outside...just look at any girl or guy who is truly happy with themselves, even when things aren't going so well, that is a beautiful person. -
Turn on: A girl who knows how to nurture those she cares for Turn off: A girl with "me against the world" syndrome, as in she thinks everyone is against her...kinda like a guys hate me because they can't have me, and girls hate me because their guys want me
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What Do Women Really Find Attractive and Appealing About Men
Dre_7 replied to BigGuy's topic in Dating Advice
I think attraction goes beyond something we can merely see or explain. But physical attraction in and of itself is based on what we see. I think nobody really knows what they want until they find it, that's why sometimes, someone who totally isn't your "type" can come your way and leave you wanting more, so to speak. -
I think when shy said the "only race that matters" he meant race is only important in the context that we are all human, not whether we are black, white, asian, indian etc. I'm sure as long as the man is not a vegetarian or an animal rights activist, he appreciates subhuman species as well.
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Guys keep in mind boy-horsecrazy's only 14. She has a lot of time to form her own views and opinions. She's going to have experiences which call her mom's philosophy into question, whether or not she holds onto it, is ultimately up to her.
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I think the same golden rule applies for girls and guys, don't appear needy. Just be who you are, show that you're an awesome person, and unless he's not attracted to you (his loss), then you've got nothing to worry about. A woman making the first move is..sexy.
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You say you're being honest, but I think you're just defeating yourself beforehand without any concrete evidence. What if a girl that you consider absolutely beautiful was interested in you? Would you turn her down because you think you're ugly? She doesn't think you're ugly...so I think that should give you and confidence boost, and motivate you to go for her..You don't have to "settle" for anything, unless you want to kick yourself for the rest of your life and have an unfulfilling relationship. I'm not saying you have to pursue supermodels, because heck, I wouldn't..but still, at least love yourself so much that you want the best that life has to offer for yourself, in terms of a job, in terms of a relationship etc. And my take on the whole concept of leagues is that, those people in higher "leagues" just wear more make up, drive nicer cars, have bigger biceps lol. It's like sports, the higher you go, the more you put into it. And anyone can be attractive to SOMEONE, being in shape and well put together is 75% of the battle. The rest is natrual charm, intellect, and chemistry. Just my 2 cents...
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Thanks Shinobie, I appreciate that. And I wish you the best as well. Having read some of your posts, I think what you need is a healthy dose of confidence,we all do. And maybe if you'd like, you could re-invent yourself. Every time, I change my appearance I feel like a new person. When I get a haircut, I feel like a new person, when I take up a new hobby, I feel like a new person..every little bit helps
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Kinda a Guy kind of Question: What makes a guy tick?
Dre_7 replied to suzysuzy's topic in Dating Advice
It depends on how the girl shows it, like recently, I've had a couple girls who I don't feel anything for asking me out, when I haven't given any indication of liking them. I'd much rather be given subtle hints, and go from there. But being asked out ad nauseum is a turn off for guys and girls alike. lol, I'm just beginning to see why so called "nice guys" don't get very far. Well, nice guys can potentially get the girl of their dreams, but not if they're the clingy, needy "nice guy." I mean guys often complain about how girls are difficult to interpret, but there is a certain essential thrill that lies in the chase. I would like a girl that likes me first, it would be foolish to dismiss someone who shows interest first. But I'm just saying that being too eager never won anyone over. These girls don't even know me all that well... -
funny you should suggest something like thatm there's this girl in my apartment building, I even know what floor she lives on and such. We were very attracted to each other, and I'm always wondering what could've been, however, I don't know if I could do the door to door thing lol...sorry maynard didn't mean to hijack the thread...we're just in somewhat similar situations.
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I see where you're coming from, but some people just can't move on after they've been close to someone for an extended period of time. It's not that they'll never be happy, but maybe they don't expect anyone else to live up to that previous standard. I don't think we ever realize how difficult it is to lose something until we actually lose it. In terms of my definition of the one, it's that person that you can't live without. There could be one such person, there could be more than one, but I think it's the one you are with, but couldn't imagine life without.
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lol of course, I understand the notion that we are all attracted to something different, lol, but I'd like to think that that's understood. And with liking a girl that your friends don't like. the same thing has happened to me so many times. I like it that way, because I know my taste is somewhat unique at least.
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I agree, and I think life has a way of natrually attracting us to our "equals."Before I used to be attracted to the model types, then I realized that, since no one that seemingly perfect exists, then personality figures into the equation more. Don't get me wrong, I still want a pretty girl, but the media gives us an image of "perfection" created by make up artists, fashion designers etc. There is such a thing as natrual beauty, expressed in confidence, smiles, playfulness and such. But the mass media would have us believe that attractiveness is all about sex appeal. It is that, but it's a whole lot more.
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yup, I agree with whatdoyado, my last girlfriend (before she was my gf) was sleeping next to me on the bus, when she woke up, she asked if she could lie on my arm, then she went right back to sleep, holding me very tightly.
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Eveybody is different, and it doesn't matter who you choose to date. People have different preferences. The only problem is if you choose to date a certain race because you think they are "better" than another. And as for God making us different colours and such, all I'm going to say on that is... variety is the spice of life.
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Great post volution, don't let it get you down too much, What keeps me going is knowing that good things come to those who wait. I mean think about it, if you've been waiting and holding out for something great, chances are that there are girls out there that you would like and want the same thing. And I hate the whole ageism thing too, where people seem to think that while you're young you should be gaining "experience," sexual experience is nothing more than a poor excuse to abuse your body. I mean, like going from partner to partner. I don't worry too much about finding the girl of my dreams, not everyone has been through the relatiosnhip grinding mill. It all depends on how you were raised, and the friends you have..these things ultimately determine the path you seek in relationships.