score123 Posted February 17, 2020 Share Posted February 17, 2020 Hi. I am a 32 years woman and this guy is 34 yars. Sorry for mi english. We dated yesterday and that was very short date as he had some other plan after. But we enjoyed a good time there. After the date he told me he had fun on the date, that the next time I should plan date because it was my turn. I feel a bit weird, he didnt contacted me after a date, is he uninterested? He asked me tocplan date next time. What does that mean? Maybe he inst interested. I haven't written anything to him since. Should I write something. On first date he payed and I know that the nect time is my turn to pay, but why should he emphasize that? And we had fun on the date, but it was short. Is he wanting to meet me, need I plan a date for next time and invite him or it doesnt is necessary? Thank you. Sorry for my english Link to comment
smackie9 Posted February 18, 2020 Share Posted February 18, 2020 I suspect he's dating other people. Me personally wouldn't bother with someone that suggests I plan the second date...that fails in my book. Link to comment
DaisyMayPorter Posted February 18, 2020 Share Posted February 18, 2020 I don't know, I think it's nice for a guy to plan the first couple of dates, but, maybe just pick a place to go? You don't have to plan too much. Just say, "let's go to dinner at such a such place". How long has it been since the date? Link to comment
Hollyj Posted February 18, 2020 Share Posted February 18, 2020 What did you do on your date? I think he should plan the second date, as the first ended early. Personally, I would move on. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted February 18, 2020 Share Posted February 18, 2020 If you are interested suggest something for this weekend. See how he responds. No do not text except to suggest a date/plan for the weekend. If you're not interested move forward. It's that simple. He's playing a bit of a game so be aware of that. Keep dating others, this doesn't sound very promising or enthusiastic. After the date he told me he had fun on the date, that the next time I should plan date because it was my turn. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted February 18, 2020 Share Posted February 18, 2020 Didn't know there was a troll hotline.🙀🤡🙊😾🐭if you are from the usa you can call this number the Will help you out with the right advice too + 🐷 🤠🐻🐭-😈🐔🦢-💩🐍🤪👾👽 Link to comment
proseyxi Posted February 18, 2020 Share Posted February 18, 2020 Dating isn`t like playing tennis. He hits the ball to you, then you to him and so on. If he wants to pursue a connection with you he would, plain and simple. I don`t think it would hurt to ask him out and see his response but be careful to not set a pattern here. Link to comment
Keyman Posted February 18, 2020 Share Posted February 18, 2020 Dating isn`t like playing tennis. He hits the ball to you, then you to him and so on. If he wants to pursue a connection with you he would, plain and simple. I don`t think it would hurt to ask him out and see his response but be careful to not set a pattern here. Why not? With the world reaching to empower women at every step, to make sure there is a 50/50 employment split everywhere, and everyone is screaming equality, equality, equality... Why at the beginning of relationships women are crying, 'But I need to feel special to you, so you have to do all the work'? Equality, except a woman's time is worth more than a man's? Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted February 18, 2020 Share Posted February 18, 2020 If I like someone, I take the risk - and plan the date according to my comfort level. If I don't like someone, I don't bother. Figuring out whether someone likes me is too complicated and is an imprecise science. If you are interested, plan a short, fun, activity. Maybe plan a game, or something outside. Link to comment
Lambert Posted February 18, 2020 Share Posted February 18, 2020 Did you feel like he was giving you the bums rush? It didnt sound like you were very satisfied by the date. Or did you feel good about it? Did you feel like maybe he was trying to get you to chase him? For me, if I feel like the guy was just squeezing me, not really being genuine, kind of acting like things are more important than me and not really expressing the care to get to know me, like hes too cool, then I would not plan anything. if you feel you do want to give a chance, plan a coffee or something. a person should receive the same effort back. Link to comment
score123 Posted February 18, 2020 Author Share Posted February 18, 2020 The quedtion is for guys, when you are unineterested why would you let the plan on her? You just be direct and don't say anything. That is better right? I am very direct, and I do not text a word unless I mean it. And what type of game may this be? What is he trying to achieve? I am curious. Or he just doesnt want me to feel bad about him not liking me, so he comes up with this just to say something. Maybe he has had bad exñeriences with other people who do not pay for a date? Maybe he means I need to pay this time? It is awkward but I just lost interest on him after those words. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted February 18, 2020 Share Posted February 18, 2020 Ok, many meets turn out to be one-time. There does not seem to be enough interest either way so in a way you can say it's a match of mutual lack of interest. This frees up any confusion and allows you to simply move forward. I just lost interest on him after those words. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted February 18, 2020 Share Posted February 18, 2020 The quedtion is for guys, when you are unineterested why would you let the plan on her? You just be direct and don't say anything. That is better right? I am very direct, and I do not text a word unless I mean it. And what type of game may this be? What is he trying to achieve? I am curious. Or he just doesnt want me to feel bad about him not liking me, so he comes up with this just to say something. Maybe he has had bad exñeriences with other people who do not pay for a date? Maybe he means I need to pay this time? It is awkward but I just lost interest on him after those words. I would lose interest, too. What did you do on the date? How long was it? Link to comment
bluecastle Posted February 18, 2020 Share Posted February 18, 2020 It is awkward but I just lost interest on him after those words. If you lost interest why the interest in solving the puzzle of him? Maybe just chalk it up to a so-so date and keep moving on toward people you click with? Link to comment
HeartGoesOn Posted February 18, 2020 Share Posted February 18, 2020 Didn't know there was a troll hotline.🙀🤡🙊😾🐭 Where have you been? Link to comment
jul-els Posted February 18, 2020 Share Posted February 18, 2020 Someone asking me to plan the next date would be a turn off for me. I’m a male, and I’m traditional when it comes to courting a woman I’m interested in. That means I take the initiative to ask her out. If she were to ask me out, I would take it as a sign of confidence and a breath of fresh air. Bottom line, if someone is interested in going out with someone, they ask them out. Having someone ask to be asked out is awkward and I would personally take it as a lack of social skills, which in turn would lose my interest. Link to comment
score123 Posted February 18, 2020 Author Share Posted February 18, 2020 Someone asking me to plan the next date would be a turn off for me. I’m a male, and I’m traditional when it comes to courting a woman I’m interested in. That means I take the initiative to ask her out. If she were to ask me out, I would take it as a sign of confidence and a breath of fresh air. Bottom line, if someone is interested in going out with someone, they ask them out. Having someone ask to be asked out is awkward and I would personally take it as a lack of social skills, which in turn would lose my interest. Dont think that is lack of confidence or social skills. As he planned the first one with so much confidence, he said what he wanted to do and that was nice. He didnt seem antisocial Link to comment
Cherylyn Posted February 19, 2020 Share Posted February 19, 2020 If you'd like to see him again and since he asked you to plan the next date, plan the next date and contact him. Since he paid for the previous date, you pay for the next date. Or, in the future, each person pays for their own meal to be fair. See how the next date is. If it's enjoyable, make arrangements to meet again. If he's not good about communicating with you electronically or following up post-date, then it's not off to a good start. I'd reconsider seeing him again IMHO. Link to comment
jul-els Posted February 19, 2020 Share Posted February 19, 2020 Dont think that is lack of confidence or social skills. As he planned the first one with so much confidence, he said what he wanted to do and that was nice. He didnt seem antisocial Yeah, I could be wrong about that, it’s just the impression I get. It’s very awkward at best. Link to comment
catfeeder Posted February 19, 2020 Share Posted February 19, 2020 The best way to find out is to ask him out. If he responds and accepts, he's interested in another date. If not, you didn't lose anything. Link to comment
IAmFCA Posted February 19, 2020 Share Posted February 19, 2020 Yeah, I could be wrong about that, it’s just the impression I get. It’s very awkward at best. I don't understand what is awkward. I do understand men wanting to know they are investing wisely, and needing to see the object of their affection return the effort. If you don't like him, don't bother. Dating just to have an activity partner is often a wasteful use of energy. If you like him, show your interest. Give him an hour coffee date, if that is what feels right. It doesn't have to be a big deal. Link to comment
score123 Posted February 19, 2020 Author Share Posted February 19, 2020 Hey guys, he just send me a message asking me out. It is alright. Thanks to all Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted February 19, 2020 Share Posted February 19, 2020 Do you both speak the same language? It seems to be a communication problem. Asking you to plan a date is not the same as asking him out and paying etc. Perhaps he's being polite and giving you the option of what you would like to do? that the next time I should plan date because it was my turn. Sorry for my english Link to comment
score123 Posted February 20, 2020 Author Share Posted February 20, 2020 Do you both speak the same language? It seems to be a communication problem. Asking you to plan a date is not the same as asking him out and paying etc. Perhaps he's being polite and giving you the option of what you would like to do? Yes same kanguage. He said next time I should plan. Maybe that was being polite. Maybe he was afraid of me being uninterested on him? He was very shy by the way. He told me he hasn't been dating from three years ago. Link to comment
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