pilip99 Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 UPDATE: my ex just texted me "hey Phil! how are you?!" what should i do everyone??? i havent responded yet it came about 2:00 p.m. funny, because she never calls me phil, is she just setting out bait? Link to comment
meantime Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 Have you taken the challenge? Remember the rules? No contact. Don't write back......think about the reasons you are here...don't do it!!!!!!!! Link to comment
Lady Bugg Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 Keefy....good job on the NC. Keep it going.... Keep the focus on yourself..and why you're doing this.... Your ex'es actions says MORE about her than about you. So please don;t let that sway your progress. Hang in there!!! Link to comment
Lady Bugg Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 As for me....no more messages since this morning. I had work all day, so no time to even think about it. I will say that NOT replying is SUCH a foreign feeling to me simply because it's not in my nature to do this...but I know it's in my BEST interest to do so, which is the ONLY reason it makes it any easier. I won't lie and say I haven't even considered responding....but then what? I'm back to square one. I figure NC will make someone step up to the plate and do what NEEDS to be done...OR they will scurry away because it's to much effort. Who needs the latter?? I AM worth the effort....we all are. So that keeps me strong. Thanks for everyones supprt Link to comment
drum4god Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 Day 12 for me, but I saw her in church. I saw her from afar. I was on the stage playing drums, and she was all the way in the back with her Mom. I peaked over a few times, and it killed me. I saw her Mom looking at me, but she wasn't. It was the first time I have seen her since the breakup. She didn't attend church the past few weeks, but today she came. I was doing pretty good, but when I saw her a wave an emotion came over me. It was horrible. I am having a tough time today. I am huge football fan, and I couldn't even enjoy the games today. Anyway, I am sticking to NC, but seeing her every Sunday is going to be tough. I wish I can avoid her, but its hard. We both love our church, and not going to leave. Its inevitable I will run into her. I just pray I am strong when I see her. I am also upset, because a friend of ours is having a going away party (she is going to Columiba for a year) and she is going to be there. I really want to go, but I can't. I don't want to see her anymore. It hurts too much. I am really frustrated, because I feel she is still controling me. There is a church banquet in February I want to attend, but I won't, because she will probably be there. I am doing NC, but does running into her count. I mean what do I say when I run into her. Right now I don't want to look at her, but at the same time I don't want to come off bitter, or like some wounded puppy dog. Man, this is tough. Anyway, I am pulling for all you guys. I really am. This is a tough time, but we are all going to get through it, and be better for it. I know it. God Bless you all! Link to comment
KoopaTroopa Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 koopatroopa you play ddr too? nice! do u play in the arcade as well? Yeah, I love DDR! Unfortunately I don't get to play in the arcade as often as I'd like (the only DDR machine is clear accross town and in kind of a seedy arcade), but I have Mario Mix at home for my Gamecube (MASSIVELY silly, I know, but it's fun!) and I play Stepmania with friends sometimes to practice the "real" DDR songs. I'm probably going to get the Playstation version soon. Link to comment
pilip99 Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 cool! pick up supernova, it'll keep you busy for sure... lots of hard songs on there Link to comment
meantime Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 Lady Bugg, so not me to not reply either and it makes me feel like the bad guy. I have learned what you have learned, if I do it is back to square one and square one is no place to be...good luck. Link to comment
annalise23 Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 After receiving plenty of emails and texts, i caved and replied. Now i feel back to square one and replying got me nowhere but more confused and more pain! He says he knows its too late for him to make up with me, but loves me etc... If he truly felt this way then he would be trying his hardest to win me back, not texting me whimpy messages saying he wants me but has not got the balls to do anything about it actions speak louder than words. I have learned the hard way, no matter how mean you feel for not responding DON'T DO IT!! You only end up suffering Link to comment
keefy1972 Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 Word COTTON worrrrrd! (I don't know how they play in diapers Cotton, I never could). Link to comment
lachi Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 This is a hard challenge for me to take because i live with my x... we own the same house together and i see him daily or every 2nd day... how can i do this because i need this... but we are trying to sort out our property together and it is negative conversations all the time? Link to comment
elithepi Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 Day uno.... I've decided I've been waaaaaaay too clingy. Gotta wait for her....while I carry on. It's really hard when it was all good and I'm NOT having selective memories. LDR was just too hard for her and she made some decisions on her own. NOW, I'm moving a bit closer and she knows that. So...we'll see...I've drug this out for a month now, boo hooing and contrived conversations....must stop picking the scab. Link to comment
stylejunkie Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 Ok, I have decided to take this challenge! First of all, I kind of initiated NC on Dec. 29th. But not fully because I am guilty of checking his myspace. So from today on for 30 days I am prepared (hopefully) to have absolutely no contact with him...and maybe after that I wont feel the urge or need to contact him or look at his myspace... Link to comment
rsxguy520 Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 Day 3 of the challenge. Woke up, things were going great. Went to Church, felt good cause it was like heaven seeing so many attractive girls. but of course i was there for church and only church. Thing that bugged me today was my brother asked me out of the blue if i was going to greet the ex tomorrow for her birthday. as much that got to me in the heart, i bursted out a Hell No, which my mom looked at me with a surprise. So ended up just going home, napping for a couple hours feeling fine once again. and here i am, posting my day 3. I guess tomorrow is going to be quiet a challenge considering its my ex's birthday. hopefully i will stay in full busy mode, or at least be with people to keep my mind distracted from it. Link to comment
Shaker Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 Count me in. I spent large bits of the weekend with my ex (our first face to face contact since BEFORE the breakup). I feel more peaceful now--or resolved--but also more sad than I have for a while. How much we love each other was so apparent in our talks I just need some time and space away from it to clear my head. Still not sure if I want to get back together with him (something we didn't talk about), but am willing to try NC to put myself on the mend. So today is Day 1. Link to comment
Aerozeppelin Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 day 2 - Woke up and went to a job interview, got a call later in the day that I got the job! Starting training tomorrow morning. I have to catch myself sometimes during the day when I want to check his facebook (become such a habit) but I just don't. I remember that this is for the best right now and trying to update myself on his current situation is just pointless. So now I have to focus on my new job and begin studying for the GMAT. If he wants to ever talk to me he knows where to find me. It's great reading your updates, everyone, we can freakin do it! I won't let you down, Superdave! Link to comment
Aerozeppelin Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 I wonder how many pages this thread will reach, perhaps the longest thread EVER Link to comment
tribecagirl Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 Hi All! I'm hanging tough! Two months and four days and I have not been in contact with the ex! I'm feeling more powerful each day! Tribecagirl Link to comment
isidore Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 SuperDave, I broke NC after 6 weeks and realized after a long talk with my family that contact is really not what's best for me now (if ever). I really want to be happy with myself and not rely on someone else for that well-being. I still love her, but I've finally! realized that it's time to move on. I did 6 weeks, I can do forever. So count me in! Link to comment
askdan Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 I'm in...haven't heard from her in over a year...however she keeps visiting my web site regurlarly (it could be from once a day to once a week...) Any ideas why she is doing that SuperDave? Link to comment
Pisces_Princess Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 Start of day 4 for me... He called on Friday but ignored the call...he text on Saturday morning to ask how the apartment hunting is going...I ignored it...he called on Saturday night...I ignored it, so basically I am doing OK. BUT...I feel dreadful!!! I am telling myself I feel OK and putting on a brave face etc but in reality I feel just awful. Does it get better??? Link to comment
needingadvice Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 Day 4 not feeling good at the moment. have woken up with a feeling at the pit of my stomach - just feel empty and like today will be a struggle to get through at this point. had a bad nights sleep, kept waking-up sharply with him in my head which is probably why i feel like i do now. keep feeling really panicky but still dont feel the need to break NC as i know that will make me feel worse. i had been thinking in my head about all the things he's done to me and sometimes im almost rational and think that why would i ever want him in my life in any form! but other times im deep in the pain again, thinking of him and his new girlfriend, no matter how much i try and push the thoughts away. what's not helped me is im starting a new job tomorrow and have been off work for 5 weeks so had alot of time to think. im nervous about starting the new job because of how i feel, but hopefully it will distract me a bit and meet new people etc. the longest my ex and i have gone without contact before when we have split (it's happened a few times) is 7 days then one of us has caved. i know this is wrong but im wondering how i will feel this time if he never contacts me. i know i shouldnt think like this but just putting my hinest thoughts down. this is so hard Link to comment
Tshwane Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 Day 1, my ex came back and after a month broke up with me.(unresolved feelings on her part). Im not that crushed but disappointed. She broke it off yesterday. Link to comment
drum4god Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 Day 13, Seeing her yesterday was horrible. How do you go NC, when you attend the same church? Why does it seem they look more beautiful after the breakup. She came to church late, and seemed to go the extra mile to look good. Anyway, I have a question. There is a going away party for a mutual friend. I really want to attend, but I am pretty certain she will be there. I don't think I can handle seeing her. I would love to go and show that I am O.K, confident, and over her, but I don't know if I can fake that. I am horrible actor. Should I go anyway? Why should I allow her to control my life? Then again, I don't know if I will be strong enough Link to comment
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