Come along for Losts online dating adventure!

[Batya33]

Happy Birthday!!

[Andrina]

[BeaTlesFan77]

Happy birthday Lost!  

[reinventmyself]

Happy Belated Birthday 🤩

[poorlittlefish]

Everything mentioned about women's profiles and how they interact on dating sites applies to men too.  Very often they put nothing about themselves and say, "Anything you want to know, just ask."  They include photos that were taken seemingly decades ago.  Most messages I receive either say, "Hey!" or "Hi, how are you?", despite my profile saying about me and what hobbies I enjoy.  Most of the time they just want to exchange messages and don't suggest meeting.  On the rare occasion a guy does suggest a date, we get as far as organising the time, date and venue (usually me having to come up with all three) before he then stops replying.

As for the claim that women get 100+ "likes" a day, at the age of 52 that's the stuff of dreams.  I've found that the "likes" tend to drop off the longer I use a site and I only get maybe half a dozen a day now.  The men sending "likes" almost never send a message and if they do, it's "Hey!"  The whole experience is overwhelmingly disheartening.

[lostandhurt]

Thank you all for the birthday wishes.  I really appreciate all of you.

 I am 60 but in my mind I am 25 so it is all good.

 

Thanks again

Lost

[lostandhurt]

Day 81

 The 56 year old from Match agreed we should talk on the phone and would contact me soon. I missed her text by about an half hour and responded but it was too late as she was heading to work. She said she would try again the next day but I got nothing and nothing yesterday.  I will be sending her a text shortly to see if we can make this work.

  Match seems to have upped their game sending me prospects I haven't seen before.  Possibly because my subscription runs out soon.

 I received 4 messages since I last posted and 5 or so likes.  Some too far away others not interested.

  POF has been less than productive as well.

 Lost

[lostandhurt]

Day 81 continued

Talked to the 56 year old and it started off well but then she started in with political complaints, the world is a mess and on and on.  Not like a rant but I could tell she was seeing if I would join in on her "views" which I did not. Agree or not agree my life does not revolve around those things and I avoid all that negativity as much as possible.  This is another thing that has made dating these days much harder as I meet someone and realize that politics are a big part of their identity and they carry way to much anger around with them.

  I am going to think about this a bit but I am not feeling it unfortunately.  Even though she said I could call her anytime towards the end of the conversation I get the feeling she wasn't feeling it either.

I have about 10 days left on Match and do not plan on continuing for now.

 Lost

[BeaTlesFan77]

11 minutes ago, lostandhurt said:

Day 81 continued

Talked to the 56 year old and it started off well but then she started in with political complaints, the world is a mess and on and on.  Not like a rant but I could tell she was seeing if I would join in on her "views" which I did not. Agree or not agree my life does not revolve around those things and I avoid all that negativity as much as possible.  This is another thing that has made dating these days much harder as I meet someone and realize that politics are a big part of their identity and they carry way to much anger around with them.

  I am going to think about this a bit but I am not feeling it unfortunately.  Even though she said I could call her anytime towards the end of the conversation I get the feeling she wasn't feeling it either.

I have about 10 days left on Match and do not plan on continuing for now.

 Lost

I was hoping things were going to work out too for you with this one. However, I agree with your thoughts about how she seems like an angry person and politics is not something that should be talked about. Better to find out now than later. 

[Batya33]

7 hours ago, BeaTlesFan77 said:

I was hoping things were going to work out too for you with this one. However, I agree with your thoughts about how she seems like an angry person and politics is not something that should be talked about. Better to find out now than later. 

Me too -some years ago I had a "first meet" with a potential good platonic friend (also 50s) -we have scary things in common -meaning so many it's ridiculous lol - and she says randomly to me "I mean you didn't vote for [Orange Man] did you???" It was not relevant and no I didn't bring up politics! I mean it was - an offensive question IMO.  I hadn't even told her my story of meeting him and speaking to him 20 years or so prior!  Stuff like that immediately gets my guard up.  It's an appropriate topic generally as you get to know someone but - not in the way you described, Lost -I agree!

[Wiseman2]

8 hours ago, lostandhurt said:

 she started in with political complaints, the world is a mess and on and on.  

Sorry this happened. Extremists are nearly impossible to get along with.  Too many axes to grind. You dodged a bullet. Wish things were working out better 😟. Hope something good comes up. 

[lostandhurt]

Thanks, I was hoping to be pleasantly surprised.  I slept on it and will not be calling her again.

Just sent out a message on POF to a woman that is 6 years younger than I am but we have a lot in common.  I think I remember her from years ago seeing her profile on a site but I am not sure.

Lost

[lostandhurt]

Day 83

Last night I got an email that I received a like on Match which  is pretty common, what wasn't common was the woman is 48 years old and gorgeous.  Never seen her on the site before so she must me new.  I sent her a message and she replied fairly quickly and then I replied to her but it was getting pretty late so I went to bed soon after sending it.  No reply as of yet.  This woman will be getting a lot of attention and messages from men to be sure so I will be surprised if I hear from her again but it was nice to receive a like from someone I could be interested in. 

  Happy Valentines Day everyone 💖

Lost

[BeaTlesFan77]

52 minutes ago, lostandhurt said:

Day 83

Last night I got an email that I received a like on Match which  is pretty common, what wasn't common was the woman is 48 years old and gorgeous.  Never seen her on the site before so she must me new.  I sent her a message and she replied fairly quickly and then I replied to her but it was getting pretty late so I went to bed soon after sending it.  No reply as of yet.  This woman will be getting a lot of attention and messages from men to be sure so I will be surprised if I hear from her again but it was nice to receive a like from someone I could be interested in. 

  Happy Valentines Day everyone 💖

Lost

Crossing everything I have that she replies back. 

[lostandhurt]

Day 84

As I suspected the gorgeous 48 year old didn't reply to my last message.  Oh well at least I got her attention for a moment.  I am sure she is fielding a ton of messages at the moment.

 Sent another message on POF yesterday as well with no response as of yet.  I also sent a Happy Valentines Day message to the 56 year old that stopped replying after a couple of messages.  She replied Happy Love Day. I replied back but nothing.

  I have about a week left on Match I think (need to check so they don't auto renew me) and I will drop off until maybe late Spring and try again.  Perhaps I should look for other paid sites and see what is out there first.

 Lost

[BeaTlesFan77]

11 minutes ago, lostandhurt said:

Day 84

As I suspected the gorgeous 48 year old didn't reply to my last message.  Oh well at least I got her attention for a moment.  I am sure she is fielding a ton of messages at the moment.

 Sent another message on POF yesterday as well with no response as of yet.  I also sent a Happy Valentines Day message to the 56 year old that stopped replying after a couple of messages.  She replied Happy Love Day. I replied back but nothing.

  I have about a week left on Match I think (need to check so they don't auto renew me) and I will drop off until maybe late Spring and try again.  Perhaps I should look for other paid sites and see what is out there first.

 Lost

What did you end up doing for Valentine’s Day?  Treat yourself to anything?

[lostandhurt]

7 minutes ago, BeaTlesFan77 said:

What did you end up doing for Valentine’s Day?  Treat yourself to anything?

Nope, I am almost done remodeling my nephews master bath so I was setting tile in the huge walk in shower I built for them. 

 I did bring my mom flowers in the morning and visited with her for a while.  She is my 93 year old Valentine ❤️

Lost

[Wiseman2]

4 hours ago, lostandhurt said:

.  Perhaps I should look for other paid sites and see what is out there first.

Sorry it's been so disappointing with Match. Personally I thought the site is awful and has way too many gimmicks, bells and whistles, click bait, convoluted steps and likes and whatnot like a maze just to try to connect to someone.

Would never have considered signing up for it for that reason as well as the type of population on there. (Jaded, angry, political). Maybe they're just angry because the site itself is so annoying? 

There are better apps out there. Some are sort of niche apps for more mature daters. There tends to be a greater ratio of women on those apps. Some apps have much better screening and matching criteria besides just some basic demographics.  Hopefully you'll research and find a deal, offer or special to try for a few months. 

While Match is the most populous and popular paid go-to app, especially for recently divorced and angry people in their 30-50s,  if it's not a good experience please don't feel alone. It's not you or online dating in general. It's that some apps are just not cut out for anything but empty promises.

I haven't mentioned my opinion of Match before since I don't want to rain on anyone's parade, but now that your subscription is running out, please consider some alternatives.  Please keep in mind the demographics of an app. For example Tinder is obviously for the under 25 crowd. OKC is for the arty, quirky alternative set. And so on. 

[boltnrun]

I've only very briefly used a dating site (literally for about a month many years ago) but once I'm ready to date I might try Silver Singles or Our Time. I'm "of a certain age" and don't want to plow through hundreds of profiles of men in their 20s and 30s to find men in their 50s. Perhaps that site or a similar one might work better for you. 

[Starlight925]

I did a trial of Our Time.  More scammers there could not be.

Everyone looking for a "lonely divorced woman" by pretending to be stuck in another country, a victim of a war zone but a highly decorated military officer, who, if I could only send some money in a cereal box, could come and sweep me off my feet.

It's so laughable, that sometimes I'd respond with "Do you need my Social Security number, or will a credit card number be ok?"

[boltnrun]

21 minutes ago, Starlight925 said:

I did a trial of Our Time.  More scammers there could not be.

Everyone looking for a "lonely divorced woman" by pretending to be stuck in another country, a victim of a war zone but a highly decorated military officer, who, if I could only send some money in a cereal box, could come and sweep me off my feet.

It's so laughable, that sometimes I'd respond with "Do you need my Social Security number, or will a credit card number be ok?"

OMG

Like I said, it's been many years since I tried a dating site. No wonder people get frustrated.

[lostandhurt]

12 hours ago, Wiseman2 said:

Sorry it's been so disappointing with Match. Personally I thought the site is awful and has way too many gimmicks, bells and whistles, click bait, convoluted steps and likes and whatnot like a maze just to try to connect to someone.

Would never have considered signing up for it for that reason as well as the type of population on there. (Jaded, angry, political). Maybe they're just angry because the site itself is so annoying? 

There are better apps out there. Some are sort of niche apps for more mature daters. There tends to be a greater ratio of women on those apps. Some apps have much better screening and matching criteria besides just some basic demographics.  Hopefully you'll research and find a deal, offer or special to try for a few months. 

While Match is the most populous and popular paid go-to app, especially for recently divorced and angry people in their 30-50s,  if it's not a good experience please don't feel alone. It's not you or online dating in general. It's that some apps are just not cut out for anything but empty promises.

I haven't mentioned my opinion of Match before since I don't want to rain on anyone's parade, but now that your subscription is running out, please consider some alternatives.  Please keep in mind the demographics of an app. For example Tinder is obviously for the under 25 crowd. OKC is for the arty, quirky alternative set. And so on. 

Thanks,

Been down this road before and I really don't get bothered by my results or the lack of them.  I am all good either way so I look at it as a bonus if I meet someone not like I lost out.  I do feel like a lot of the women I am attracted to get paralysis by analysis. They get a pretty good stream of men interested in them so they just keep waiting for Mr. Perfect to come along and in the meantime are alone not meeting anyone. 

 As far as Match goes it is a numbers game, the more women the better my chances but I do need to look at other sites for sure.  It really isn't a money thing as I can easily afford a subscription, it comes down to being focused on one site or two and being serious with my intent.  

 Since the Match Group owns a great many dating sites I am afraid their gimmicks are found across most sites, just with different shapes and colors.

Lost

[BeaTlesFan77]

15 hours ago, lostandhurt said:

Nope, I am almost done remodeling my nephews master bath so I was setting tile in the huge walk in shower I built for them. 

 I did bring my mom flowers in the morning and visited with her for a while.  She is my 93 year old Valentine ❤️

Lost

I'm sure she appreciated the time spent with her.  That's how my mother and I are.  We prefer time spent with each other doing things rather than gifts or possessions.  She is my 76 year old Valentine and we went to Cheesecake Factory on the 13th.  

[lostandhurt]

2 hours ago, boltnrun said:

I've only very briefly used a dating site (literally for about a month many years ago) but once I'm ready to date I might try Silver Singles or Our Time. I'm "of a certain age" and don't want to plow through hundreds of profiles of men in their 20s and 30s to find men in their 50s. Perhaps that site or a similar one might work better for you. 

 Let us know when you sign up, I am sure you are going to get TONS of interest.

I have seen the commercials for those sites and I think they are owned by Match Group so they are probably run the same.  I will definitely check them out and see what I see.

  Lost

[lostandhurt]

2 minutes ago, BeaTlesFan77 said:

I'm sure she appreciated the time spent with her.  That's how my mother and I are.  We prefer time spent with each other doing things rather than gifts or possessions.  She is my 76 year old Valentine and we went to Cheesecake Factory on the 13th.  

That is awesome.  She isn't my birth mother, she took me in when I was in my late teens as my home life was not so good.  Big Italian family I consider my own.

Good call going the day before.

Lost