I hate my manager ! Should I quit ?

[Westsidechic80]

I started a remote work from home job , love the fact that’s it’s working from home , the benefits are great and amazing ,but I have the manager from hell 

- if he gives me a task , literally 30 minutes later he’s asking me if I’m done yet 
- if I’m one minute late logging into a meeting he is messaging me asking me if my whereabouts 

- if he’s training me on a task , I’ll give my input and ask him if I can do it another way , he will shoot it down and tell me do it his way 

-if someone asks me a question, not business related , but a personal question he corrects me . All the time he has actually done this to me a few times 

- will correct how many spaces I put between paragraphs or if I miss a comma 
- corrected or reprimanded me for using a reply all . He asked me to enter in a car allowance for an employee I hit replied all and just asked him specifically how much is the car allowance and he replied back to me don’t click reply all if you are asking me a question personally 
- always asking when I’m taking lunch . I don’t  control whether I can take lunch at a certain time ( this isn’t a big deal ) 
-his boss - the SVP is always mentioning me in meetings and asking for my feedback , I think he got upset about this 
- I accidentally misspelled a word  : please , except I left off the e , he actually sends me an email to say “we need to work on your grammar “ and other things 😩

am I being too sensitive ? Should I quit ? 
I’ve only been with the company for two weeks ! What should I do ?

[Wiseman2]

6 hours ago, Westsidechic80 said:

Ive only been with the company for two weeks 

It seems like you are not accustomed to their way of doing things yet. 

While some of it seems like micromanaging, some of it,such as being late, hitting reply all and misspelling seems sloppy.

Always keep your LinkedIn profile and resume current. Continue to network and stay in touch with former colleagues.

Working 14 days and being this upset about some minor quirks they have is being oversensitive. All jobs have their protocols and annoying aspects.

Just try to get through the learning curve unless you have unlimited funds and don't really need a job.

[HungryGhost]

Wow, that's intense. It's true that every job comes with a learning curve, but innocent typos and being ONE MINUTE late to a meeting? Those are entirely forgivable things. I'm willing to bet your manager does them too, but when he does, he holds himself to a different standard and thinks it's fine.

I have worked similarly awful jobs with bad leadership, and I am still dealing with the aftermath, trying to rebuild my self esteem and climb up in the job hierarchy after being constantly told that everything I did was wrong for 5 consecutive years. It's not worth it. You have only been there for 2 weeks, so you must still be in job hunt mode. I suggest you stay in that mode and keep applying until something else comes along. 

[DarkCh0c0]

Yikes! He's a tough one. Either you adapt with time, or be quick with the job hunt. In the meantime, try to do some relaxing activities after work to offload the stress. If you must quit, do so and don't mention this job on your resume.

When you are looking for the next job, tell interviewers you came to see that you and your manager didn't see eye to eye on certain aspects and that it was better for everyone if you moved on to a company with a better fit. Something within these lines.

[Jibralta]

Actually, I don't see that these are unreasonable asks from your manager. Reading through them, he is emphasizing procedure and expectations for task completion. It also sounds like he is emphasizing that spelling, grammar, and formatting make up an important part of your responsibilities. All of this is to be expected, especially at two weeks into a job--he is telling you what is important.

If you don't like these responsibilities, or if you dislike your boss as a person, you should look elsewhere. But it's not unreasonable for him to tell you what is expected of you, and it's not unreasonable to ask you to stick to the very clear rules that he lays out. Even if you were volunteering and working there for free, you should do as you're asked. If you do whatever you please in someone else's organization, you make trouble for people.

Additionally, at any job, you should be on time for meetings, and you should be able to tell your boss your schedule during your working hours if they ask. This means that you should nail down a lunchtime upon request and stick to it. 

[Tinydance]

Well to be honest I'm thinking half of your manager's behaviour is micro managing but the other half is just doing his job as a manager.

I mean, unless he sent it all to you in caps lock and yelling at you or something, asking you not to "reply all" is fine, as he's just telling you to reply just to him. I've actually received those "reply all" E-mails occasionally at work when the person didn't mean to reply to me and I was like, why are they sending me this lol

I understand about the one minute late thing is a bit anal, but just because you're in an online meeting doesn't mean that you should be late to those meetings. Having a job requires being on time and yes your manager is probably uptight but he's also letting you know that it's the workplace standard to be on time at this job.

When he's training you for a task and you asked him if you can do it your way, that depends if your way is correct or not. He's your actual manager, he got the manager role presumably because he's experienced and was suitable for it. You're a new employee so he was showing you how to do things. Usually  a workplace expects you to do things how they do it there and not "your way".

Having said all that, if you prefer to work in a more laid back workplace with a chill boss, obviously this is not it. If you have experience and good references then sure you can look for another job that you might find more suitable to what you prefer.

[Tinydance]

7 minutes ago, Jibralta said:

Actually, I don't see that these are unreasonable asks from your manager. Reading through them, he is emphasizing procedure and expectations for task completion. It also sounds like he is emphasizing that spelling, grammar, and formatting make up an important part of your responsibilities. All of this is to be expected, especially at two weeks into a job--he is telling you what is important.

If you don't like these responsibilities, or if you dislike your boss as a person, you should look elsewhere. But it's not unreasonable for him to tell you what is expected of you, and it's not unreasonable to ask you to stick to the very clear rules that he lays out. Even if you were volunteering and working there for free, you should do as you're asked. If you do whatever you please in someone else's organization, you make trouble for people.

Additionally, at any job, you should be on time for meetings, and you should be able to tell your boss your schedule during your working hours if they ask. This means that you should nail down a lunchtime upon request and stick to it. 

I think in regards to spelling, it also depends who is reading what you wrote. If the clients of the company or higher management read them, you can probably understand that sending badly spelt correspondence doesn't actually look good for the company. But if it's just your colleagues that read your E-mails then yeah it probably doesn't matter as much. Some managers are more strict than others and some are more relaxed,  but overall I don't see too many things in what you wrote that your manager is out of line.

[Kwothe28]

I think you are taking the wrong approach here. Sometiems supervisors are just strict because they want you to do your job properly. Some like that you go "down the line". For example, if they asks something to be done their way, you say "Sorry, wont happen again, it will be done". You need to learn to approach those things in the right way. 2 weeks is very little time. Ok, maybe they dont like you, but just quiting because his approach isnt what you want, is an overreaction. Give it time, try to adapt. If it still doesnt go and you are unhappy, then quit. 

[Lambert]

When you start a new job. you have to learn what the manager expects AND put your best face, foot, & effort forward. It is hard and just like anything new, it takes time.

He might be being hard on you, but he may have a point

As a former manager, I did not tolerate 1 minute late. I did expect well written, thoughtful responses. I did want to know when people took breaks and lunch. 

Once I worked with a person for awhile, they knew me and I knew them.  I was in better place to allow some wiggle room.  Being the manager requires a person to make sure the work is actually being done and correctly. Are you making it personal?

As it is now, 2 weeks in, he's expressing his expectations. How you are taking the feedback? The only response really should be, thanks.  I know for next time. 

Here's my best advice for when floundering at work- what you CAN do, do really well.  be on time or better yet be early, proofread your work, stay humble and professional.

Working from home requires YOU to manage the perception others have of you.  When I'm working from home, I give the impression I am sitting in front of my computer, waiting for anyone to reach out to me. I respond very quickly, I am on time to everything, I'm camera ready. 

If you really hate it, look for a new job.  but know from an outside perspective, this very thing may likely happen at the next job, too. being on time, adjusting to the nuances expected of the job, telling your boss when you are taking lunch and breaks are pretty normal things.  

Have you had other jobs? In this field? What was the experience? 

[Seraphim]

He is doing his job. It is two weeks and you are late for a meeting? You see it as only a minute but actually it’s disrespectful. Grammar errors and spelling mistakes do matter. Hitting reply all to everybody is going to bite you in the bum one day. If you were talking to one person talk to one person. These are incredibly easy to fix, it’s attention to detail. That’s all he’s asking for not that hard. 

[DarkCh0c0]

8 minutes ago, Lambert said:

Have you had other jobs? In this field? What was the experience? 

I'd like to know too. OP is this the first time you work remotely? Are you a fresh graduate or experienced person? Cause if you're a fresh graduate, I can see how this is overwhelming-but normal and will tone down with time as you get used to it. But if you are an associate/senior, I don't find it as appropriate to micro-manage your work. Yet, it might also tone down as you get used to their work preferences.

[Rose Mosse]

11 hours ago, Westsidechic80 said:

am I being too sensitive ? Should I quit ? 
I’ve only been with the company for two weeks ! What should I do ?

Yes, you are being too sensitive. Your manager is responsible for the work you put out and a reflection of his training or standards in his department. Every correspondence and product, phone call, business deal, negotiation, client relationship or general issues on a day to day belong to the company, not to you. The email you send belongs to your company and every word you write is as a representative of that company and you acting as a professional in your line of business or chosen field. Don’t treat it like an email to a friend or a method or procedure that you would otherwise do outside of work. The things he was asking you to do are not out of line.

Having said that there are ways to train and deliver that and some managers are better at it than others. Stay for a bit longer, a year or more, and see whether you get the hang of things. Otherwise, how are other aspects of the work? 

[reinventmyself]

You are new and I get the sense he's setting the expectation.  As much as it does appear micromanaging, if it continues after an undetermined training period, I would rethink it.  But for the time being I'd learn to roll with it.  

Working remotely there is an incredible amount of accountability, seeing he neither really knows you and doesn't have the benefit of working along side of you. He's left to testing you to see who you are.
I can only imagine what hiring under these circumstances might be like.  I left my job the end of last year and several seasoned coworkers had turned shady, became unaccountable and worked around the system so as to work for only a handful of hours a week and got paid for 40.  I suspect it makes managers on edge and trying to figure out how to trust their staff.  Especially new staff.

[Wiseman2]

[Rose Mosse]

Some days it does feel like whackamole. A friend used to do this thing whispering “calm blue oceans”, close her eyes and purse her lips in meditation pose and I just laugh every time I think of her. 

 

[Batya33]

I agree with Jibralta.  I try to be within 5 minutes early for meetings and I’ve been at my job 5 years and more than proven myself. If I’m going to be a minute late for our weekly zoom staff meeting I email my boss.  I’m rarely late but if we have no internet etc it takes time to reboot. 
I do notice if someone is a minute late depending on what if is. I don’t say anything but if it’s a pattern with no explanation I notice it and not in a good way. 
In my field punctuality is really important.  So is email etiquette.  
I agree he’s micro managing and I’d try to follow Jibralta’s perspective on this. 

[Fudgie]

He sounds a little micromanage-y but...you've only been there 2 weeks. There are some growing pains with new jobs and how people treat/relate to you during this new period may not last. Your boss may be a little harsher/forward with you because you're a new employee and have not established yourself yet as a good, trustworthy employee.

If you enjoy the job and like the benefits, I would definitely stick it out, at least a few months. Take criticism well, don't react emotionally, and let things roll off your back. And, of course, work hard and diligently and give it a little time. You may well see that he backs off, either because you have established trust and/or he finds a new target to micromanage.

[boltnrun]

One of the engineers I support sent a snarky email in response to a question I had this morning. He basically said "I don't know why you're asking me this question, the answer is right in front of you." Well, it wasn't or I wouldn't have asked. I just replied with a thanks and that I would wait for the thing to be processed first before I do my part. No need for me to respond to his snarkiness.

However, yesterday I was accused on chat of doing something I hadn't done. I think the person accusing me didn't realize I was on the chat. In that case I did defend myself because she told the engineering manager a falsehood that could have affected my status with the company. And she ended up apologizing and acknowledging that what she had said was inaccurate. However, I have been with this company for a year and have performed very well by all accounts.

Yes, one minute late, particularly when working from home, can be a big deal because people are busy and won't like having to wait in the new person to get started. Same with typos.

Just perform as professionally as possibly and if you're unhappy keep your resume updated and keep searching.