franciss Posted April 8, 2017 Share Posted April 8, 2017 My bf and I have been together for 7 years. I am bothered by the fact that he has not asked to marry me. I feel like he doesn't care enough about me to put effort into planning a proposal. He doesn't bother to do anything romantic for holidays like Valentine's Day or our anniversary. He does not take me out on dates that he plans (although he's fine with anything I suggest). He does not plan our vacations; he lets me plan 95% of what we do. I am bothered by his lack of initiative and the lack of romance in our relationship. And I wonder if he really loves me; maybe if he loved me, things would be different? 7 years and no ring; is this normal? I've talked to him about how I would like to get married. A couple years ago, I thought perhaps he might have been held back financially. I've told him that I don't care for an expensive ring or ceremony. He was in school at that time, so I thought perhaps he was also focusing on his studies. Now he is working full-time and making a six-figure income. And the only logical conclusion I can come to is he just doesn't care that much about me. Today, I brought the marriage issue up again. He quickly changed the subject to how I don't love him and walked out the room. Now he's holed up in his office and giving me the silent treatment. Now I'm starting to question whether or not I really want him to propose to me. I had wanted it so much because I wanted my bf to be romantic and I wanted to know that I was worthy of his time and effort. If he proposes to me now, I'm going to feel like he did so because I asked him to. And a part of me dreads what I see coming. He'll either push this out of his mind and get back to work. Or put in five minutes of effort buying a ring online and ... I don't know, winging it. Link to comment
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