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Clio last won the day on August 19 2020

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  1. You don't really love him. Real love is accepting the other person as they are NOT blaming them for something that they did before they even knew that you exist. Virginity is just the absence of a specific experience. It doesn't make someone more special than others nor does it give anyone the right to judge and be obnoxious like you are being to him. You knew that this guy was not a virgin, you succumbed to your lust for him and once it was satisfied, you turned around and judged him and you call that "love" and you "special" for having been a virgin? There is nothing special about virgi
  2. You didn't outright force him to stay but you did try to control the situation in roundabout ways by paying for him, offering to buy a house, "convincing" him to come back and doing things on camera that you weren't really comfortable with. Whether you realise it it or not, putting up with someone's crap like that to your emotional expense and "giving them the world" was an effort to control the outcome. Had things been reciprocal, you wouldn' t have had to go to such extremes and they wouldn't need any kind of "convincing" in order to be with you. Jumping through hoops and making sacrifices
  3. Based on what you describe, you have a warped sense regarding what is acceptable in relationships and what constitutes a healthy relationship. You need to learn to recognise incompatibility and you need to learn to accept it and move on from such people. This guy is incompatible to you and mentally abusive, yet you kept trying to control him and make him stay with you. The road to healing your self-esteem doesn't go through trying to win over the approval of men who mistreat you, nor through trying to fix them or trying to change for them. Imo, the events that you described show that you n
  4. This guy has a live-in gf yet you are choosing to focus on him. What makes you think that the road to happiness ever involves winning over players/cheaters/other women's boyfriends? Imo, getting involved would be trading one relationship train-wreck for another. You need to work on your self-esteem. No self-respecting person goes after people who are already in a relationship.
  5. Don't beat yourself about it. It's only human to want a relationship. You did not ***ed up but yes, imo, you do need to move on from this guy. Good luck.
  6. Based on the information that you provided, it sounds like you are very bad at enforcing your personal boundaries and if you don't fix this, it's going to land you on heaps of pain. This guy cohersed you into sending him nude pics and the fact that you gave in indicates that you suffer from low self-esteem and inability to uphold your personal boundaries against people who don't respect them. This guy has made it crystal clear that he only wants sex through words and actions. You on the other hand have stated that you want a relationship, yet through your actions you have shown to him that
  7. I second the above. Breaking up wouldn't make her a terrible person but knowingly choosing to risk emotionally scarring another human being through full-on cheating, which is where she would be heading at if she doesn't clean up her act, would be a whole different story. Infidelity tends to create emotional scars and trust issues on the people that are cheated on. Personally, I have trouble excusing cheaters no matter their age. The vast majority of us have been taught as children that cheating is wrong and that one should not do to others what one would not want to be done to them, so on
  8. Imo, you need to return your focus where it is really due. Your long-term relationship is in BIG trouble, to the point that you are shopping around for another man. Why is that and what are you missing? You need to sit down first with yourself and then with your current boyfriend and try to identify what is going on. Your current relationship is lacking communication and is heading to a nasty breakdown and the new guy is acting as a catalyst and as a distraction. Guilt is useless. Imo, you need to tell your boyfriend that the last couple of months have been very rough for you and discuss w
  9. It sounds like you have made in your head what you two really have bigger than what it really is. You have never met him in person i.e. in reality he is a stranger to you. You two are just two strangers chatting online. Exclusivity at this point makes no sense. You should keep meeting other men. Investing months talking exclusively to just one person online without being able to meet is not an efficient way to meet a partner. It is your choice whether you do it or not but being annoyed at the other person doesn't sound reasonable imo. If you want exclusivity, you can discuss it with him
  10. Based on what you wrote, you sound just not that into her. Imo, if you are feeling that lukewarm so soon, she is a rebound and the chances of it working out are not good. Imo, you should inform her of your misgivings as soon as possible so that she can make informed choices. Wanting to play the field is a clear indication that you are not in love with her and she should be informed of that before she moves states for you.
  11. Your wants are incompatible. If you stay, chances are that you will waste valuable time and still break up down the line. If marriage and children are among your dreams for the future, it would be best to keep searching for someone who has the same life goals as you and who doesn't let his family dictate his future or at least someone whose family won't object. True love is a two way street. In your case, he has already stated that even if he was ready, he would have trouble convincing his family. Those are not the words of someone who loves you unconditionally. Think long and hard how mu
  12. Only time will tell if he will give you another chance. However, it sounds like you have unresolved issues regarding your sexuality and you felt entitled to explore them while being in a monogamous relationship. Those are two major deal breakers right there. If he was the one posting, my advice to him would be to move on. You need to resolve your sexuality. Messing people around like that is very unfair to them. You need to sort out your sexuality and your stance on monogamy before you enter another relationship whether it's with him or anybody new, and then be honest/upfront to your part
  13. Do nothing. Get on with your life as if she's never coming back. If she is really hung up on her ex, nothing you do can help your case. If you respect her need for space and back off, your efforts might be remembered down the line and she may reach out to you in time but right now it sounds like any more efforts will push her further away. For whatever reason, she is not into you at this point. Going after her is unlikely to work imo. Moving on and letting her process her break up on her own might be the only solution. You have made clear your wishes. Now step back and let her reach her
  14. Hi there. I don't think that anyone can tell you what his thoughts and feelings may be. Based on your previous post, you were together for only three months. First, he love-bombed you. Then, he broke up with you via text message, which was a major douche move. Imo, there is a chance that you were a rebound and then his ex came back. That is just a guess but if that is the case then your text would be an inconvenience to him. Regardless, based on the way he left, chances are that he won't reply or he will reply something lame. Based on the way he broke up with you, he has an
  15. He was like that when you met him so, imo, you don't have the right to get upset about it. You have every right to uphold your personal boundaries, but resenting him for it when you knew about it right from the get go is not fair imo. It was your informed choice to marry him. You need to reframe your thoughts about it in your mind so that you do/ask him what is right for you without resenting him in the process.
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