bella101 Posted July 26, 2016 Share Posted July 26, 2016 My bff met her husband on a dating site and she suggested it to me. I was working, going to school, getting in great shape and being a mother to my daughter. I wanted nothing to do with a guy.. but i gave it a shot... it doesnt hurt to try, right?. So ... I would only check my messages whenever I was bored... one night.. I was bored and checked my messages... I got a message... And replied... soon we were on the phone ... weeks later we go on a date... and so on... for a couple months... of course he would always try to have sex... but i wouldnt... then he tells me hes unable to have kids... then i noticed something... he has a son... he says soon after him something happened and he went to the Drs.. where he was told he would never be able to have kids again... so months after I decided to have sex.. without a condom... he cant have kids anyways.. we kept in touch for a couple weeks... then Nothing... a month after conception... i miss my period and start having nausea... i go to the Drs.. thinking I cant be pregnant.. i mean he cant have kids... surprise im pregnant... i let him know.. he wants nothing to do with the baby... he leaves... for 2 months to get someone else pregnant... also his ex had gotten pregnant but didnt keep the baby... and this girl also dpesnt keep the baby... then he comes back... only to cheat and continue to tell others he has no kids and cant have any... when he already has 2 that we know of... and yes he also lied to his 1st babies mom about being fertile.. my question is why??. Link to comment
Brookeinabox Posted July 26, 2016 Share Posted July 26, 2016 Honestly, first off, Congratulations on the child! It's a new life full of innocence and love. From what I'm reading, he seems like he (excuse my language) is a man- who craves sex and will do absolutely anything to get it even if it means lying. I'm sorry you experienced this and I hope you never have to experience it again. There are 8 billion people in the world, don't let what he did to you get to you or your children. Good luck and Congratulations once again! Link to comment
Jibralta Posted July 26, 2016 Share Posted July 26, 2016 my question is why??. I suggest you don't dwell on this question too much. I don't think you will ever find an answer that satisfies you. The more important question is, What did you learn? 1. He's a rotten liar who can't be trusted 2. People will lie for no good reason Link to comment
bella101 Posted July 26, 2016 Author Share Posted July 26, 2016 But why continue to lie... lie about having children... lie about being able to have babies... Why??. sociopath?. Ugh... now i really dont wanna date again... ever.. and not to be cocky... its not like a cant get a guy... Link to comment
chitown9 Posted July 26, 2016 Share Posted July 26, 2016 Gosh....the answer to that is simple. He wanted to encourage you to have sex with him without the fear of pregnancy. He did not have any concern whatsoever if in fact the girl gets pregnant. He probably dislikes condoms. He is just very, very selfish with no conscience. chi Link to comment
bella101 Posted July 26, 2016 Author Share Posted July 26, 2016 Hes just rotten inside. Im so disgusted.. he cheated on me with anybody... 30 different femalez.. and 1 ended up working with me... fyi.. i no longer work there... Link to comment
shellyf62 Posted July 26, 2016 Share Posted July 26, 2016 So you werent on birth control? And you trusted this guy who you only knew for a short time? And you had unprotected sex with him so probably picked up STDs? I honestly think he doesn't like to wear a condom, tells women what they want to hear, and goes for it. Sorry but more fool you & all the other women who believe him! Link to comment
Jibralta Posted July 26, 2016 Share Posted July 26, 2016 Who knows? You can drive yourself crazy asking that question. Sure, he could be a sociopath. Or a sadist. Or just plain crazy. ETA... Or yeah, like others have said, he just doesn't like condoms... which means you had better get an STD test. Link to comment
bella101 Posted July 26, 2016 Author Share Posted July 26, 2016 Crazy.. hes from chicago. Link to comment
bella101 Posted July 26, 2016 Author Share Posted July 26, 2016 I know i was so dumb to not think of the risks of stds... but luckily and i thank God.. i only got a blessing.. my son.. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted July 26, 2016 Share Posted July 26, 2016 He didn't want to use a condom. You know, because "it doesn't feel as good", or "it's like taking a shower with a raincoat on!!!" Fortunately you didn't catch any STDs. He will not continue to be so lucky, though. Eventually he WILL catch something and then pass it along to whoever else he manages to dupe with his lies. Link to comment
bella101 Posted July 26, 2016 Author Share Posted July 26, 2016 He didn't want to use a condom. You know, because "it doesn't feel as good", or "it's like taking a shower with a raincoat on!!!" Fortunately you didn't catch any STDs. He will not continue to be so lucky, though. Eventually he WILL catch something and then pass it along to whoever else he manages to dupe with his lies. Then why didnt he let me know the next morning to take the morning after pill... why does he continue... is he really trying to have babies everywhere... are there guys really like that??. Link to comment
Ms Darcy Posted July 26, 2016 Share Posted July 26, 2016 But why continue to lie... lie about having children... lie about being able to have babies... Why??. sociopath?. Ugh... now i really dont wanna date again... ever.. and not to be cocky... its not like a cant get a guy... It takes two people to make a baby. It never mattered to me what anyone said, I always used birth control. Perhaps you should consider that if you want to prevent another pregnancy. Congratulations on this child! Link to comment
Ms Darcy Posted July 26, 2016 Share Posted July 26, 2016 I know i was so dumb to not think of the risks of stds... but luckily and i thank God.. i only got a blessing.. my son.. That's the other thing. STDs. Ideally, you both would be getting checked before sex and then using condoms as well. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted July 26, 2016 Share Posted July 26, 2016 Then why didnt he let me know the next morning to take the morning after pill... why does he continue... is he really trying to have babies everywhere... are there guys really like that??. Because then he'd have to admit he lied! He probably wanted more sex from you, and if you knew he lied you'd make him wear a condom. Just remember for the future, just because a guy is allegedly sterile doesn't mean he can't pass STDs on to you. Sex is not worth dying for. Link to comment
bella101 Posted July 26, 2016 Author Share Posted July 26, 2016 Because then he'd have to admit he lied! He probably wanted more sex from you, and if you knew he lied you'd make him wear a condom. Just remember for the future, just because a guy is allegedly sterile doesn't mean he can't pass STDs on to you. Sex is not worth dying for. I have the iud and yes very cautious now. . When i was 5 months pregnant after the other girl didnt keep the baby and he reached out to me.. he told me.. he knew he can have kids.. i hate him... Link to comment
dave_1966 Posted July 26, 2016 Share Posted July 26, 2016 Gosh....the answer to that is simple. He wanted to encourage you to have sex with him without the fear of pregnancy. He did not have any concern whatsoever if in fact the girl gets pregnant. He probably dislikes condoms. He is just very, very selfish with no conscience. chi Or just a simple stupid liar. Link to comment
j.man Posted July 26, 2016 Share Posted July 26, 2016 A man who lies about not being able to have children is just as sick as a woman who lies about being on BC. There's not a whole lot you can say to rationally explain what could be going on in their head because it's not healthy or normal. The other posters have driven the points of your own responsibility home, so I won't beat that dead horse. Good luck with everything in the future. Make sure this guy pays every cent of child support. Link to comment
ThatwasThen Posted July 26, 2016 Share Posted July 26, 2016 I know i was so dumb to not think of the risks of stds... but luckily and i thank God.. i only got a blessing.. my son.. So you did get tested then? You say you don't want to date again but that will change so when you are ready to get back out there, make sure you go on the pill and insist he where a condom until you've both gotten a clean sti workup. In the meantime forget why he does what he does and concentrate on your two little ones. He a walking aids incubator so if you didn't get tested please do. Link to comment
Jibralta Posted July 26, 2016 Share Posted July 26, 2016 A man who lies about not being able to have children is just as sick as a woman who lies about being on BC. Very true. Link to comment
bella101 Posted July 26, 2016 Author Share Posted July 26, 2016 Very true. Do u think girls lie about bc to get pregnant on purpose?? Will that be the reason why guys lie about fertility? Link to comment
boltnrun Posted July 26, 2016 Share Posted July 26, 2016 Yes, some women lie about birth control to trick their husbands or boyfriends into getting them pregnant. I personally know a few women who did that. For one, it worked out because the guy married her...oops, but they got divorced later on when she had an affair. Another person I know who did that went through an abortion because the guy wouldn't marry her like she'd hoped he would. Some men lie because they don't want to wear condoms. They insist it "doesn't feel as good" with condoms. And they don't seem to care how many children they father. I personally know a guy who has 5 children with 4 different women. Doesn't pay child support for any of them. I know another one who fathered 4 children with the same woman, but won't marry her OR pay child support. Neither of these guys "believe in" birth control, but apparently they don't believe in being responsible parents either. And the women made poor choices when deciding to procreate with these men. The poor kids. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted July 27, 2016 Share Posted July 27, 2016 So he can ride bareback. Why have sex without a condom? Do you have stds also? my question is why??. Link to comment
bella101 Posted July 27, 2016 Author Share Posted July 27, 2016 So he can ride bareback. Why have sex without a condom? Do you have stds also? NO STDS... THANK GOD.. the only POSITIVE outcome was my BLESSING... MY SON... Link to comment
bella101 Posted July 27, 2016 Author Share Posted July 27, 2016 Some men lie because they don't want to wear condoms. They insist it "doesn't feel as good" with condoms. And they don't seem to care Neither of these guys "believe in" birth control, but apparently they don't believe in being responsible parents either. . I wonder if these types of immature stupid "guys" (not men) even care for their own children... i mean why father children if you dont care... it makes no sense... Link to comment
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