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She seems like upset with me, but she was trying to talk to my brother and sister in law before. What does she think of me?


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So there is this girl (21/f) who use to say mean things to me (24/m) on facebook and in person. I mean it got annoying afterwards and I kinda got offended. She said things like 'YOU HAVE NO TASTE IN MUSIC, YOUR MUSIC SUCKS, YOU ARE NOT A BUSINESSMAN.' She asked me what girl I had a crush on in middle school, I told her, and she told my brother. I asked her why she was like that and she was 'idk i guess I like to annoy you.' I got pissed and I cursed her out. And she blocked me.

Years later she unblocked me and I reblocked her. But idk, one time I saw her, and I said that 'I tried to get to know this girl but it didn't work out' and she just laughed out loud.

Years later, I tried adding her as a friend on fb and messaging her saying I wanted to talk, she didn't allow me to friend her and didn't respond to me. So I assumed she didn't care and I didn't care. I was just trying to 'fix' things but it seems she wasn't ready to.

Next time I saw her, We didn't talk, but she did sit at the same table as me with other friends we have in common. She tried talking to my brother and sister in law, I mean she seemed to get along with them. She later wanted to take a group picture and I sat at another table, I didn't want to be in her picture. I think alter she looked at me and looked upset?

The next day, when she was about to sit at a table, I saw there too and she didn't sit, she moved to another table. I mean I enjoyed myself, I didn't care about her or give her attention. But I did notice towards the end she looked at me, glanced and looked upset.

I mean I just am wondering what she wants me to do? Not saying I will nor do I say I care, I am just wondering why she is behaving like this? Does she just hate my guts?

I mean for the most part people like me, I'm a respectable person in society and I think I'm doing great things. Just curious about why she is like this because she seems like a horrible horrbile person. I feel like I did the right thing ignoring her ass.

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Who cares? Are you a professional trying to analyze or do a case study on why some people act inappropriately, rudely or mean? This person and you do not get along.  This person treats you rudely and disrespectfully over and over again.  You've somehow decided to keep interacting with this person despite this neverending improper and rude/harassing treatment.  The problem is why are you not knowing your worth and enforcing appropriate boundaries?

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1 minute ago, Batya33 said:

Who cares? Are you a professional trying to analyze or do a case study on why some people act inappropriately, rudely or mean? This person and you do not get along.  This person treats you rudely and disrespectfully over and over again.  You've somehow decided to keep interacting with this person despite this neverending improper and rude/harassing treatment.  The problem is why are you not knowing your worth and enforcing appropriate boundaries?

No i understand what you're staying.... I avoid her, I don't talk to her. I ignore her, i have her block on my fb....

Just for curiosity's sake, wondering what she thinks of me thats what. 

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44 minutes ago, phone324234234 said:

No i understand what you're staying.... I avoid her, I don't talk to her. I ignore her, i have her block on my fb....

Just for curiosity's sake, wondering what she thinks of me thats what. 

Again why do you care so much why a person who has no respect for you thinks of you?

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1 hour ago, phone324234234 said:

No i understand what you're staying.... I avoid her, I don't talk to her. I ignore her, i have her block on my fb....

Just for curiosity's sake, wondering what she thinks of me thats what. 

She's made it pretty clear she does not like you.  For whatever reason.  You need to just ignore her and move on with your life.  Who cares why she doesn't like you, she's not likely to tell you.

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11 hours ago, phone324234234 said:

 who use to say mean things to me (24/m) on facebook 

Years later she unblocked me and I reblocked her. 

Years later, I tried adding her as a friend on fb 

Just delete and block her and all her people from ALL your social media and messaging apps.

"Years later"? How long has this been going on if you are 24?

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I'd stop telling myself it's for "curiosity's sake" -it's deeper than that and take this as a warning sign that you try to connect and reconnect with people who mistreat you - somehow you like the idea maybe of the challenge of "convincing" them to like you (which is not possible).  If you accept it's not just curiosity then you're less likely to chase people who mistreat you.

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15 hours ago, phone324234234 said:

 

So there is this girl (21/f) who use to say mean things to me (24/m) on facebook and in person. I mean it got annoying afterwards and I kinda got offended. She said things like 'YOU HAVE NO TASTE IN MUSIC, YOUR MUSIC SUCKS, YOU ARE NOT A BUSINESSMAN.' She asked me what girl I had a crush on in middle school, I told her, and she told my brother. I asked her why she was like that and she was 'idk i guess I like to annoy you.' I got pissed and I cursed her out. And she blocked me.

Years later she unblocked me and I reblocked her. But idk, one time I saw her, and I said that 'I tried to get to know this girl but it didn't work out' and she just laughed out loud.

Years later, I tried adding her as a friend on fb and messaging her saying I wanted to talk, she didn't allow me to friend her and didn't respond to me. So I assumed she didn't care and I didn't care. I was just trying to 'fix' things but it seems she wasn't ready to.

Next time I saw her, We didn't talk, but she did sit at the same table as me with other friends we have in common. She tried talking to my brother and sister in law, I mean she seemed to get along with them. She later wanted to take a group picture and I sat at another table, I didn't want to be in her picture. I think alter she looked at me and looked upset?

The next day, when she was about to sit at a table, I saw there too and she didn't sit, she moved to another table. I mean I enjoyed myself, I didn't care about her or give her attention. But I did notice towards the end she looked at me, glanced and looked upset.

I mean I just am wondering what she wants me to do? Not saying I will nor do I say I care, I am just wondering why she is behaving like this? Does she just hate my guts?

I mean for the most part people like me, I'm a respectable person in society and I think I'm doing great things. Just curious about why she is like this because she seems like a horrible horrbile person. I feel like I did the right thing ignoring her ass.

I think you may be misinterpreting her looking upset. It could be disgust with you as she seems a whole lot of hostile and then some. She may not want to have anything to do with you because you continue to reach out to her and try to impress her. She doesn’t like you at all! Time to take the hint and just stop. 

If you see her in mutual circles, mingle with other people and don’t bother with her. Don’t reach out to her online anymore. You keep doing the same things again and again and misreading the signals she doesn’t want to have anything to do with you.

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She hostile and a little unbalanced.  Why single you out if you haven't had any real life interaction with her?  

It seems you let her opinion of you rattle you.  Why give someone you don't know have that power to try to define you or second guess yourself?

Who cares what angry inappropriate strangers think?  You are just her convenient punching bag.  Block her and ignore her.

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3 hours ago, reinventmyself said:

She hostile and a little unbalanced.  Why single you out if you haven't had any real life interaction with her?  

It seems you let her opinion of you rattle you.  Why give someone you don't know have that power to try to define you or second guess yourself?

Who cares what angry inappropriate strangers think?  You are just her convenient punching bag.  Block her and ignore her.

i actually don't know why she singles me out. I hardly ever speak to her or anything. I mean I just ignored her and shes not my friend on fb. 

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6 hours ago, Rose Mosse said:

I think you may be misinterpreting her looking upset. It could be disgust with you as she seems a whole lot of hostile and then some. She may not want to have anything to do with you because you continue to reach out to her and try to impress her. She doesn’t like you at all! Time to take the hint and just stop. 

If you see her in mutual circles, mingle with other people and don’t bother with her. Don’t reach out to her online anymore. You keep doing the same things again and again and misreading the signals she doesn’t want to have anything to do with you.

I don't continue to try to reach out. She gave me those looks when I was ignoring her. I wasn't talking to her, I have her blocked on fb. I didn't try to reach out to her. I did months ago and thats it.

She still continued to give me these links and move away from me. It all happened while I was ignoring her. 

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22 hours ago, phone324234234 said:

. I was just trying to 'fix' things but it seems she wasn't ready to.

There's nothing for you to fix. SHE was rude towards you.

22 hours ago, phone324234234 said:

idk i guess I like to annoy you

Apparently, she's not attracted to you and used to find joy in making fun of you.

So why bother?

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3 hours ago, phone324234234 said:

I mean for the most part people like me, I'm a respectable person in society and I think I'm doing great things.

Then this is what you focus on...

WHY bother with rude people at all?

You keep your distance and you move on with your life. No worries over her behaviour with you. and no, you do not try to add such nasty people to your 'friends list' on social media.

We will never get along with everybody - this is your example.

 

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15 minutes ago, SooSad33 said:

Then this is what you focus on...

WHY bother with rude people at all?

You keep your distance and you move on with your life. No worries over her behaviour with you. and no, you do not try to add such nasty people to your 'friends list' on social media.

We will never get along with everybody - this is your example.

 

no i get it, i pretty much ignore her and have her blocked on fb. But why is she behaving like this with me? She seems to be a jerk who would rather insult me . I'm glad i cursed her out before. 

I don't ever give her the time of the time, just wondering why shes like this. I mean people like me. 

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6 minutes ago, phone324234234 said:

no i get it, i pretty much ignore her and have her blocked on fb. But why is she behaving like this with me? She seems to be a jerk who would rather insult me . I'm glad i cursed her out before. 

I don't ever give her the time of the time, just wondering why shes like this. I mean people like me. 

Because she can.  It takes two and you've interacted with her despite her being rude to you.  You teach people how to treat you.  Cursing her out was not a good choice because it's in writing and she can use it against you if she wants to.  Much better not to interact with an online stranger who treats you disrespectfully.  I was treated inappropriately by a Facebook stranger last week.  I was polite in my response and explained that I would no longer be interacting unless he responded in the way I requested. He didn't.  I blocked him.

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15 minutes ago, phone324234234 said:

But why is she behaving like this with me? She seems to be a jerk who would rather insult me . I'm glad i cursed her out before. 

Of course people like you.. but she doesn't seem to favour you - so you accept it and move along.

Like I said, we can't please everyone.  

So avoid the 'toxic' and carry on.  Stop wondering 'why'.

And yes, as mentioned ^ , as for the cursing out, don't play games.  Don't react back to someone who's got a chip on their shoulder or is acting out negatively.  Just avoid.

Accept that you do not get along with this one and you move on with life.  That's it...

 

 

 

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The next time you see her, tell her that you will unfriend her from social media only because you prefer to see her in person in a social setting with your mutual friends.  Tell her that that there are times when people get along more peacefully in person compared to social media, texts, emails, voicemails, phone chats or any type of electronic communication.  Start out the conversation with:  "With all due respect, .  .  .  Thank you for your cooperation."  This way you've explained, you're demonstrating that you're a peaceful person and you'll do what is best for you and her. 

I've noticed that with some people, in person socializing is best and there is no awkwardness because there was no communication in between in person socializing.  Nothing gets lost in translation, the friendship or acquaintanceship is lighter , tends to lean more towards remaining civil and polite which is better than the alternative. 

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