Fat girl.

[OptomisticGirl]

That's it, I'm pouring a glass of wine. Thanks Faraday. hahaha

[Batya33]

I am naturally thin and always have been. For a number of years, almost 30 years ago, I had an (undiagnosed) eating disorder which messed up my relationship with food for several years.

 

My only other dieting experience was that I had to lose my baby weight (about 15-20 pounds) which I did in 5 months, then lost an additional 5 pounds because of my new more active lifestyle as a full time mom.

 

I strongly believe in moderation including for people who have a weight problem. When I had to lose my weight I did a lot of comfort eating because I was so sleep deprived/emotional but I certainly cut back.

 

Although I have never tried it (but tried many other diets) I've seen Weight Watchers be very successful for a number of my friends with weight problems (in their 30s/40s like me). Weight Watchers does not advocate cutting out food groups entirely from all that I know.

 

I have an emotional relationship to food but it doesn't result in my being overweight or unhealthy. I don't think I need to rid myself of all emotional attachment to food -I think it's reasonable and basically normal. I don't think overweight people should have to end all emotional attachment to food either -that just seems too drastic (I am sure there are exceptions depending on how overweight the person is and how life threatening the extra weight is -I'm no expert!). I think balance and moderation work best for most people. When I went on drastic diets (and boy did I) I ended up rebelling and it resulted in an even more skewed/emotional relationship to food.

 

Just my two cents.

[redrose85]

To some extent I agree with eating everything in moderation, but I also feel that a lot of the foods out there, even in smaller quantities, mess with our metabolisms and cause our bodies to hang on to fat cells. When possible, it’s better to get all the nutrients you can to help support your body in a journey to be healthier, and go easy on the junk food.

[Cheetarah]

I haven't tried WW, but my aunt who is in her early 50s, is on it and having great success! She always has a couple leftover extra points at the end of the day. She prepacks her snacks and labels their point value. And she eats well, very well. Eats the things that she likes, too. We ordered a pizza once and told m e how much her serving was worth, point wise(and I would say it was sizeable, definitely not the serving size for a small dog or anything), and she still had 3 left for a snack before bed, if she wanted.

 

Batya, I had been counting calories for the last year. I lost about 80lbs. After my gallbladder surgery, I broadened my diet to include healthier fats that I hadn't been able to eat. I gained a little from that, and a little extra from some indulging. Don't blame myself really, I had very few things I could eat that didn't give me an attack. Anyway....I got a little nutty after the weight gain, which really wasn't even that significant. I started cracking down hard on the calories counting and eliminating tasty, richer things. I was getting obsessed, and I found I was starting to binge and when I wasn't, I had a very strong desire to do so. I decided to stop counting. I'm not doing anything that's going to make me crazy or mopey. I aim for a ballpark amount that I eyeball when I consume my meals and I don't worry about it anymore. And since doing that, the desire to binge has gone waaay down.

 

So I agree with you about the rebelling thing.

[redrose85]

^

I hate counting too. Life is too short!

 

I am hoping that biking 20 K per day 5 days a week and eating home cooked meals will be enough for me.

[hers]

Day 12 plank: 48.99 seconds. Couldn't get traction under my toes. Must wear shoes next time.

[Fudgie]

It's great that you lost it You had surgery though, it's a bit different.

 

The same rules apply. In fact, I have to pay attention to my nutrition more than most people. But I see the same nutritionist and follow the same dietary advice, just different amounts.

 

I no longer need food to feel good nor do I need to "treat" myself nor do I need food as a reward and surgery didn't make me that way, thinking did. Everyone does better when they can get to that point (as in, stop having an emotional relationship with food) but most won't because it requires sacrifice and it's no fun working on those issues. Although I would argue, once you are there, its liberating.

 

To not crave everyday anymore for certain flavours, that's the real reward. Many people I know who have had surgery still crave. They aren't there.

[faraday]

I'm really good at losing 30 pounds. I've done it about 6 times. And I usually do it in about 2 months. But...I always gain it back...every time. Because I cut out all "junk food" and eat salad for 2 months. Then when I feel really good....I think, "I can have one piece of cake" but it spirals because I haven't been practising moderation. I glutton everything. Every fricken time.

 

I didn't believe the people on my fitness pal that said that they ate everything and still lost weight...but here I am...down 4 pounds in the first week, and tomorrow is my official weigh in for week two. And I've eaten pizza 3 days this week...and ice cream 3 times (and like, the real ice cream, made with cream)...I've also had 3 beer, and 2 margaritas. I'm staying within my calories. Now, if I want a 6 pack, my diet will need to change. I will need to start eating meat. And on the days when I go to the gym, I have a protein shake. I eat way more veggies than I was. I'm also eating way less. I used to eat 1/2 a pizza in a sitting and eat another piece before bed...but now I have 2 pieces tops.

 

There might come a time when I need to work on increasing my protein for my macros...and I'll deal with that when I plateau. But for now...I'm just going to work on more vegetables and eating ice cream with my daughter...and making nice dinners for my bf...and living my life. One 1,842 calorie day at a time.

[faraday]

Your stomach can hold a cup of food at a time. The average stomach holds 1.5 liters of food. You get full WAY faster. Satisfied WAY easier.

 

You are on a 900 calorie a day diet (and I know, you're doctor has you on it...but... My doctor would smack me if I did that) I am not. You need to eat really nutrient dense food...where as I have the stomach room and the calories to eat what I like.

 

I don't believe that life is about sacrifice. I don't do jobs that I don't like because I need to make money...I create jobs that I like and make money that way. I don't budget. Ever. I make more money.

 

I live my life in the way that makes me happy. I tried the sacrificing way to lose weight...and I'm done. I'm going to pay attention to calories, but enjoy my life...and if I don't end up losing weight...that's okay. I'm not gigantic, I can run 10 kms, I feel sexy, my bf thinks I'm hot, and life will go on. But I really do think I will lose weight this way....and keep it off.

 

You keep talking about this all or nothing thing. I'm talking about a happy medium. What's wrong with compromise?

 

What you have going for you is working for you. But not everyone is going to want to not enjoy ice cream or burritos (mmm burritos).

 

 

The same rules apply. In fact, I have to pay attention to my nutrition more than most people. But I see the same nutritionist and follow the same dietary advice, just different amounts.

 

I no longer need food to feel good nor do I need to "treat" myself nor do I need food as a reward and surgery didn't make me that way, thinking did. Everyone does better when they can get to that point (as in, stop having an emotional relationship with food) but most won't because it requires sacrifice and it's no fun.

[faraday]

Oh! I've been barefoot this whole time! But it's not my feet that get me, it's my arms dying :S

[Cheetarah]

I was just thinking about the stuff Faraday is saying, Fudgie.

 

It IS different for you. You'll get ill if you overindulge. Your belly is satisfied with small meals. You feel full, faster.

 

And yes, you are militant about the whole thing and very...anti fat, kind of remind me of former smokers, lol. If that works for you, awesome. I tried being militant with myself and it was making me nutty. Your method may be successful for you but it isn't going to be for a lot of people.

[Fudgie]

I think to think that changing your lifestyle and weight loss is NOT about sacrifice to some degree and deep fundamental change is silly, frankly. It's a common attitude though but if that's the prevalent attitude, well, it's not a wonder why so many struggle now. Clearly it's not working if you refuse to look hard at emotional eating and seek to change your food relationship. That's why people fail.

 

Anyone who has lost any real amount of weight and kept it off is more militant, surgery or not. I follow the lifestyle model of the lady who has lost 150 on her own, without surgery, and kept it off for years after going through a journey to address the emotional food issue, not a yo-yo dieter or someone who hasn't had to lose a lot. Follow the success stories and you will be one.

 

Well, I'm exiting this thread. I should have known better. Best to stick with my support group and those who know what I'm talking about and have lost a lot of weight rather than be told "Oh its sooo different" like my advice doesn't apply. Whatever. I'm on the right path.

 

Best of luck, hers. I'm sure you'll get there. Be sure to check out those books I suggested. You are on the right path and asking the right question. It's not about the food, it's about your relationship with it. Once you change it, you feel infinitely better.

 

*unfollows*

[hers]

I do agree regarding the emotional eating. It's hard for me. It's my vice. I don't turn to alcohol or drugs or sex when I'm happy, sad, celebratory, grieving, etc. I turn to food. It's not fuel for me. Every meal is an event. So I have emotional dependence on it for sure.

 

I think health and exercise are things that aren't black and white. One persons regimen won't work for someone else. Everyone has opinion, a different opinion. Even doctors. So I have to find what works and stick with it.

 

I've sort of been thinkin about it in the same lines of the whole debt snowball thing I'm doing with finances, based on Dave Ramsey's advice. It's best to make a budget and stay within it. If you go over or mess up, have enough left over (ie, exercise or something to apply to dieting) to make up for what you messed up on. Still make yourself happy but don't forget the end goal. Don't do it for riches but do it for quality of life.

 

To me, it sort of applies.

 

So I I find a mindset that works, I'm gonna try to stick with it. Emotional dependence on food or not.

 

My coworker was a size 8 a year or so ago. She never looked bad. Never was "fat" or overweight. But she wasn't happy with herself. Started being a little healthier, being good, tracking calories, etc. she's a size 4 now an looks great. But she cheats often. And right now she says she's fallen off the wagon bc she's so into all the foods she didn't eat for a while. Kind of like you, faraday. So she loses it, gains a little back, but recognizes she'll want to lose it again and will do the work. Doesn't punish herself. Doesn't make herself feel bad. Just gets back on the wagon. To me, she has a healthy outlook of it.

[Cheetarah]

We pointed out that there is a physical difference in that your stomach is smaller than that of a person who hasn't had surgery. If you overindulge, you can vomit/feel nauseous all night. That's a pretty crappy association to have with overeating. If I overeat, I just feel like I can't zip my pants.

 

I'm glad it works for you, but there is not only one right way to do things. You pretty much came in here implying that X has to be done to have any success. It just doesn't work like that.

[petite]

Most I've ever gained was under 30lbs, I wouldn't even all it overweight, it was just kinda...bigger chubbier but not super overweight.

I've never liked diets, I think all these diets out there make most people miserable, but I am a huge believer in making a healthy lifestyle change.

 

There are things I don't eat and probably never will, like butter on sandwiches because I never liked it, or mayonnaise and various salad dressings. I grew up eating salad with just olive oil and lemon dressing, and it's what we consume now.

I don't eat fatty bacon, most of the chocolate I consume is dark and 60% cocoa or above, but I do love my Nutella and other sweets. I don't deprive myself, but I don't have sugar with tea, no soda (EVER) because I hate it and it's ridiculously unhealthy, whole wheat pasta or spelt, we eat 'real' pasta maybe once a month, never store bought sauces or tomato sauces, my family makes their own.

I eat white bread maybe once ever few months, we never buy it it's usually if I'm out having breakfast and it is sourdough.

Don't suck on lollies, we buy a small bag of baked chips which comes from the healthy section at the supermarket, and that's maybe once a year, no butter on popcorn. Don't eat chicken wings, or chicken skin, trim off any fat from meat etc.

 

So...we indulge, with the stuff we like, such as desserts, but don't go downing a whole cake, stick to one piece, we still enjoy roasted lamb and bureks, and our ethic food like cabbage rolls and dolmas, but we also watch how much we consume because it wouldn't be very good for us to eat half a pound of carbs and fat.

 

I never deprive myself of chocolate or dessert, which are my favorites. I always have them, but I know my limit. And I don't overeat, which I think is a big issue for many people and what a lot of people struggle with. One more bite one more bite and them boom second and third swerving.

 

I don't believe in juice diets, smoothie diets, carb free diets, etc, I just believe in eating good healthy food.

In my opinion dessert and sweets are not evil, I enjoy them, but then again, I don't go having two doughnuts followed by a coke. I'll have a doughnut once in a while followed by water or homemade lemonade without sugar.

 

Really, meal prep is key.

 

I realize some people think differently, but for me eating out is enjoyable that said, we don't eat at fast food places or chain 'restaurants'. If I'm going to eat out I prefer it be a fine dinning restaurant where the menu isn't laminated.

 

I really believe making a lifestyle change takes time (but there shouldn't be many excuses), it's trial and error, but it can be done. I also think many people make excuses can't exercise today, can't do this, can't jog, can't walk, can't stop consuming this blah blah blah. There is no can't, if someone wants something bad enough they CAN work on making changes. If it takes years to lose 10lbs then it is time to reevaluate what is being consumed.

It's always easier to go through the Mc Donald's drive through and have a chuckle about it, then making a healthy meal at home.

[hers]

Yea I've actually never called what I'm doing "dieting" except in my last post bc I'm really just trying to make a healthier lifestyle change. Or just healthy choices in general. Like knowing what's bad for me and such. Staying away from trigger foods if I can (right now I'm struggling).

 

I'm a big dessert person too but I need very little to feel satisfied. Cakes are my first choice, for obviously bread-like reasons. But a bite is more than enough. My piece of cake today was very thin and it hit the spot.

 

Portion control is a biggie for me. I just rarely feel full (I. Fact, I wrote a thread on it probably 5 or so years ago). I have a hard time with it. So I'm starting to try to eat slower. My one slice of pizza today took me 15 mins to eat. That's a record for me. But I just kept slowing myself down so I wouldn't get so excited. Your stomach feels full slowly so you can put more away the faster you eat and then by then, you've over eaten and feel disgusting.

[petite]

The same rules apply. In fact, I have to pay attention to my nutrition more than most people. But I see the same nutritionist and follow the same dietary advice, just different amounts.

 

I no longer need food to feel good nor do I need to "treat" myself nor do I need food as a reward and surgery didn't make me that way, thinking did. Everyone does better when they can get to that point (as in, stop having an emotional relationship with food) but most won't because it requires sacrifice and it's no fun working on those issues. Although I would argue, once you are there, its liberating.

 

To not crave everyday anymore for certain flavours, that's the real reward. Many people I know who have had surgery still crave. They aren't there.

 

I eat rather healthy, I exercise daily but there are things I still crave, like strawberries (favorite fruit), chocolate mouse, chocolate cake, and ice cream. I also crave certain healthy dishes. I think liking food, and enjoying is important. As someone that is super active and a runner, I realize that food is fuel, I know which foods work (for me) but I think having the opinion that one can't crave food (or different tastes) is rather unhealthy and dissociative.

 

I personally, don't see anything as a 'treat' but I do enjoy what I eat. If I'm just eating to cure hunger, that does nothing for me especially if she food is blah, boring and bland.

[petite]

Hers, and that's what you need to work on (sorry not trying to be rude, really) but I totally think that knowing when to stop eating is key. Like many people you're probably used to eating until you're full and stuffed, by eating slower, and taking the time to enjoy what you're eating, exploring the different tastes and aromas, you will notice overtime that you don't need to feel stuffed in order to be full and satisfied.

[hers]

Hers, and that's what you need to work on (sorry not trying to be rude, really) but I totally think that knowing when to stop eating is key. Like many people you're probably used to eating until you're full and stuffed, by eating slower, and taking the time to enjoy what you're eating, exploring the different tastes and aromas, you will notice overtime that you don't need to feel stuffed in order to be full and satisfied.

 

 

 

That's one of my goals actually. To really enjoy food more, not for the emotions of it but for the beauty of it. It's unreasonable to get so angry when you mess up cooking a dish (I did that twice today). I def have a lot to work on with y relationship to food.

[petite]

By the way, I think making smart choices, and eating healthier is much better than eating salads and only eating particular food in order to lose weight. Since obviously once that goal is achieved people go back to their old habits. It's a process, it has to happen gradually and overtime. Losing weight isn't the most difficult part, it is keeping it off and being healthy.

 

If someone were to lose 10lbs by eating salad then goes back to eating Burger King, that weight will creep back. And that sort of yoyo dieting and constantly going up and down and having that don't give a stuff attitude as long as the weight is off is really unhealthy. Because people are always bouncing up and down then and overtime that impacts their health.

[faraday]

Has anyone here ever read The Weight Loss Prescription? She talks about subbing in food, changing portion sizes, and deciding when to emotionally invest in food (like if you have two birthday parties in a weekend, maybe just eating the cake at your nephew birthday instead of your neighbours...that kind of thing)...it made a lot of sense to me...she talks about making changes to one meal a week...until you do a food make over. I'm loosely basing what I'm doing off of that....because I'm tracking. I need to see how much I can eat, and she's more like, just eat less calorie dense stuff.

 

It was a good read. She has chapters in there for 8 different types of eaters. I need to re-read it because mine has changed since I stopped working from home....because now I eat out a lot more (which hasn't caused any weight change oddly) because I'm so busy now :S

[petite]

That's one of my goals actually. To really enjoy food more, not for the emotions of it but for the beauty of it. It's unreasonable to get so angry when you mess up cooking a dish (I did that twice today). I def have a lot to work on with y relationship to food.

 

And you recognize and don't make excuses, which is a big plus. I think most people have cravings and things they like and enjoy. Eating what you enjoy isn't bad, as long as you know when to stop. Of course it is always better ( for us and our bodies) to eat healthier versions of our unhealthy meals.

I substitute a lot because I know it is healthier for my body, but then again, I don't run away from food. I enjoy meal time, I like going out to eat and I like cooking and exploring different dishes.

 

There is a lot of trial and error, but it can be done, it can work. It takes time, but it is a reachable goal.

[hers]

My coworker's friend has lost 30 lb just by calorie counting and being more aware. She's a big girl and doesn't work out but I figured calorie counting was at least worth a shot.

 

It's nothing for me and jared to cook an 8-pack of crescent rolls to eat with dinner and each have 4 in addition to green beans, some sort of rice or pasta side, and some meat. I had no idea how many calories were in 4 crescent rolls (100 each! Not counting the butter if put on each one!). Now that im tracking and seeing how many is in each one, I'm buying packs of 4 crescent rolls instead of packs of 8 and eating 1 or splitting that second one with jared. So I'm noticing myself doing changes like that.

[hers]

I'm not big on excuses for myself. I'm huge on personal accountability (probably obsessive about it--must admit when I'm at fault or have done something wrong or if I'm being ungrateful). So like tonight I didn't go to the gym not bc I didn't want to but bc I was already feeling down on myself and knew if I went, I'd push myself too hard and belittle myself later for not doing better. So I'll go tomorrw. Sure, I was over on y calories (only by 36) bc I didn't work some of tem off but I purposefully made decent dinner choices in my portion and ate slowly so that id not go over so much. The frozen yogurt is what put me over he top (I asked for their nutrition guide) but still estimate I had only about 200 calories there. Not terrible, especially bc I could read complete nutrition and ingredients for it and know it's not awful stuff I was eating. (At least I don't think it was--remember I'm still learning).

[redrose85]

I’m going to emotionally invest in some ice cream now