Strife Posted August 26, 2010 Share Posted August 26, 2010 We were just chilling in Mcdonalds, my family and my aunt and uncle...even though you thought you'd never fit in, even though you've never eaten with all of them, I imagined you there, sitting next to me. I seem to miss you at dinner. You really have messed me up again. I nearly caved, nearly threw away the (now) 10 days NC to text you that 'I missed you', then spent the entire car journey trying to twist any words you've said to me, to mean that you want to get back together in September. But thats messed up. I'd be coming second to M, and your desire to be single. I finished reading GPYB, and I'm going to take a lot of it onboard. I'm going to keep a journal, and I'm going to throw the teddy and card you gave me on valentines. It's hard...I wanted to keep them even though they remind me of you, of happier times you threw away for nothing, and left me to pick up the pieces. My first valentines card... I hope to God you realise your mistake, that you'll change like you promised, that I wont have to find someone/something else to fill this hole that you left. I'm moving on (or trying to) because I cant break NC and ask you if theres a chance, and because I deserve better than this. Link to comment
Nappeal Posted August 27, 2010 Share Posted August 27, 2010 I love you, but I very much dislike you. Its not your fault you are who you are, its just that who you are sucks. You'll never find true fulfillment in another because you will never find true fulfillment within yourself. I don't have anything to say to you, and for right now, I'm ok w you not having anything to say to me...un/fortunately, I know you do not have anything to say. IF you were ever to ask me back, thru tears I'd have to give a thanks but big ol NO THANKS. For someone who is so loved; for someone who is so popular; for someone who has so many admirers, you lead a life that is actually very lonely cuz you recycle relationships like some recycle their trash. I couldn't live like you, nor could I live my life WITH you like that. I want to move on and I will in my own time. All I ask is you be there for your child. Take care of your baby w true and genuine love. Link to comment
Starrgrl Posted August 27, 2010 Share Posted August 27, 2010 I just smile... I go ahead and smile Link to comment
SnowFox Posted August 27, 2010 Share Posted August 27, 2010 Its not your fault you are who you are, its just that who you are sucks. This made me laugh. Its a good line. Link to comment
abigheart Posted August 27, 2010 Share Posted August 27, 2010 Maybe I shouldn't have gone out tonight...I need to stop talking about you to other people. I saw our mutual friend at the pub. It was a bad idea to go out tonight because I knew by the time I got home I would look at old photos of us together on Facebook and see how you are doing. I try to always put up a defense before I click, "I'll be okay, I'll be okay," cringing as I click and scroll through. I breathed a sigh of relief that I didn't see anything new. Pathetic, aren't I? You haven't looked at my page in months, I'm sure of it. Sigh, I miss you a lot. I moved into my new place, and the one person I want to show this place is to you. I wish we can cuddle and talk as long as we used to, laugh and laugh, eat cookies in bed while I fall asleep in your arms when we watch a movie on your laptop. I miss playing footsie before bed and waking up to see you next to me. I miss looking forward to coming over to your place after a long day's work. I can't believe I haven't seen or heard from you in 4 months. I can't believe we split close to half a year ago. I can't believe I have been able to make it THIS far without reaching out to you once. I've been close, believe me. But at the same time, I can't believe I am not in the SLIGHTEST bit over you. I still love you so much, and I am fighting back tears as I write this. I try to be a tough cookie, but sometimes all I want to do is just run into your arms and know that everything is okay. But I can't. I know you are in another place in your life, and well, so am I. Maybe our paths will cross one day, but I guess time will tell when that is. Right now, all I want to do is call you up, say hello and that I miss you. I wonder every day, if you still think of me. You can do anything you want in your life but the last thing I want is for you to think badly of me. Do you? I really hope you don't. I hope that, if anything, you know you're doing this for YOU. I hope that you still are looking out for me, too. It's hard to tell sometimes what exactly happened, how we ended here, but in the end we both didn't see eye to eye in the relationship. One time in the past we did. I wish you good health and happiness - today was the first day of classes, right? You're a senior in college! I'm curious to know how your thesis planning and all that is going. I bet you're going to do great. And I want to tell you about my new job and how much I really like it there. You'd be so impressed, I know it. I love you so much, and I know that if you love someone, the best thing sometimes is to leave him/her alone. I'm sorry we couldn't be friends like you had hoped, but I would have robbed myself of healing, I would have continued hurting and hurting while I keep on a smile just for you. I hope you understand why I needed to cut ties. I am trying to give you as much space as you need. I hope you know that I"m not doing this as a means to get you back or to provoke a reaction from you...you deserve to be yourself and to go for what you really want in your life. If that meant leaving me, then it meant leaving me. One thing I regret not telling you when we parted ways for good, and I told you friendship was impossible...I wish I had told you that I am still here for you when the going gets tough. I wouldn't want you trying to go on as if everything is okay, but deep down, I really hope you know I'm here for you when you're scared about certain things that happened with us. I hope you know I'm still someone you can trust and look to. I'm still here. Link to comment
OneBrightStar Posted August 27, 2010 Share Posted August 27, 2010 You know how we talked about moving to Chicago next year? Well, guess what? It's going to happen for me, whether you're in my life or not. And while I'm riding high, you'll be stuck in the desert, still overweight, and dating some desert trash. Letting go of me will be the greatest regret you'll ever have. Mark my words. Link to comment
Starrgrl Posted August 27, 2010 Share Posted August 27, 2010 I love you... so much. God. =( Link to comment
Philpo82 Posted August 27, 2010 Share Posted August 27, 2010 You are not your friends. They don't know what you had. It's sucks they made you feel like you owed them something by being with me at weekends. You can find better people for friends. Link to comment
biggestdork Posted August 27, 2010 Share Posted August 27, 2010 Who woulda thought I'd miss you this much. Shouldnt have fallen for you.... Link to comment
Cheetarah Posted August 27, 2010 Share Posted August 27, 2010 Dear Mr. ex man, At my dismay, I've missed you here and there. I didn't think I would, but as time goes on anger fades. I can confidently say I would never take you back, and it's important that I hold onto that(and I don't see it going anywhere). I don't want to know how you are. I must admit it would bother me if you were deliriously happy after all that went down. So for the sake of my own heart and healing, I let it be. I'm not the woman for you. You're not the man for me. I could analyze it all day long but in the end, that's what it boils down to. -Me Link to comment
ryder Posted August 27, 2010 Share Posted August 27, 2010 To my ex, After never putting any effort into us, you must have a whole lot of effort saved up. Can you please use some of it towards staying away from me now? Thank you. On the other hand, I miss you. Have you re-thought this at all? Link to comment
Strife Posted August 27, 2010 Share Posted August 27, 2010 Please, please get out of my dreams...sleep is the only escape I have from you, and yet for a week now you have just shown up. Get lost. Link to comment
LarsWB Posted August 27, 2010 Share Posted August 27, 2010 I love you Dee, and always will. There's no getting around it. I married you, twice, for a reason. Please stop torturing me, please stop coming into my dreams and thoughts. It hurts worse than you'll ever know. Link to comment
lvsthebeach Posted August 27, 2010 Share Posted August 27, 2010 Got your email this morning. I had that sick feeling in my stomach seeing your name in my Inbox. Thank you for doing what I asked. I replied simply. I didn't even put my name at the bottom of the response. I am still feeling a little sick. Just when you are out of my mind, you pop back. Grr. I hate that feeling. I will be at K's lake house this weekend. Relaxing and having a good time. There are memories of us there but I can't let that effect my time there. We were there together 9 days before I found out about her. We had a good time. Then to think that it all came crashing down 9 days later. Wow. I simply cannot wait until you are completely out of my life. No verbal contact and very little email has been great but we still have to communicate b/c of the house. Ready for it to sell and for the divorce to be final. Then we will never have to talk/email to one another again. What a sad ending to a 14 year relationship....... Link to comment
Angelaa Posted August 27, 2010 Share Posted August 27, 2010 i fail at nc all the time HAHA im dumb Link to comment
Angelaa Posted August 27, 2010 Share Posted August 27, 2010 SO let me get this straight you tell me I "deserve better" than you (LOL oh ok.) and when I tell you I like someone else you get angry... the first spark of emotion I have seen since it was over... your maturity is really overwhelming at this point Link to comment
hidden_kitten Posted August 28, 2010 Share Posted August 28, 2010 really missing your arms and those brown eyes tonight...but it wasn't enough for our future together. Link to comment
LarsWB Posted August 28, 2010 Share Posted August 28, 2010 really missing your arms and those brown eyes tonight...but it wasn't enough for our future together. I LOVE Miyazaki. On to it then... I miss you Dee, I miss you terribly...every thing about you. It's Friday night and I wonder if you miss me....if you're thinking about me....what you're doing while I'm here at home taking the kids out for dinner and having fun together. I have arts shows and I go alone. I'm at home, and I was invited to all kinds of things tonight....but I didn't go. I want you to come home. I've asked God and the Universe to touch your heart and soul. You told me you LOVED me only a few weeks before you left. I know it's inside you. I'm trying to detach, to move on...but how do I do it? Please give me peace. Please come home and give us one more chance. We have 16 yrs together. I miss you. Link to comment
Starrgrl Posted August 28, 2010 Share Posted August 28, 2010 I remember years ago Someone told me I should take Caution when it comes to love I did, I did And you were strong and I was not My illusion, my mistake I was careless, I forgot I did And now when all is done There is nothing to say You have gone and so effortlessly You have won You can go ahead tell them Tell them all I know now Shout it from the roof top Write it on the sky love All we had is gone now Tell them I was happy And my heart is broken All my scars are open Tell them what I hoped would be Impossible, impossible Impossible, impossible Falling out of love is hard Falling for betrayal is worst Broken trust and broken hearts I know, I know Thinking all you need is there Building faith on love is worst Empty promises will wear I know (i know) And know when all is gone There is nothing to say And if you're done with embarrassing me On your own you can go ahead tell them Tell them all I know now Shout it from the roof top Write it on the sky love All we had is gone now Tell them I was happy And my heart is broken All my scars are open Tell them what I hoped would be Impossible, impossible Impossible, impossible Impossible, impossible Impossible, impossible Impossible, impossible Link to comment
GotMyLifeBack Posted August 28, 2010 Share Posted August 28, 2010 Why did you give up? Why are you so cold to me? Who are you? What has happened to you? Link to comment
let_it_be Posted August 28, 2010 Share Posted August 28, 2010 I miss you. Why won't you give us another shot? We've both changed and grown up, I think we'd actually be pretty great together now. I don't even know why I still think these thoughts when you have been so mean to me post-break up for SO LONG. Link to comment
bart Posted August 28, 2010 Share Posted August 28, 2010 I can't remember the sound of your voice. It's so weird. Link to comment
Gennifer Posted August 28, 2010 Share Posted August 28, 2010 Sometimes I wonder if NC was the right decision. Sometimes (like now) I get so tempted to sign in in hopes that you'll talk to me. I still think about you all the time. I wish I knew if I was doing the right thing or not. Link to comment
WomanWriter Posted August 28, 2010 Share Posted August 28, 2010 Who are ya thinking of tonight? Me or her? My little niece asked about you today. I just told her you were at home. Hope to see ya in Co-Ed group like you said you wanted to start coming to again. I told Selma I'd be there since she's leading. If you don't care about Anna, why are you still with her? I think you really do like her. Maybe she's just mean to you, but you can't resist it. Are you trying to save face? Part of me thinks so because she is hotter than me and your non-Christian friends are probably rooting you on with her. Well, if you care more about status than me, then that tells me something, doesn't it? Something tells me you want to be with me but will not let yourself go there all the way because you don't fully trust me. I'd like to prove it, but what good is that when you are still with her? As soon as you dump her, come to me. I hope you know you can. But I also can't throw myself at you. You said it took a lot to keep fighting for me. I get that. I'd fight for you this time, but not with another person involved. That's something I just have to draw the line with. If you were single, I'd do what I had to do. So if you really do care, do it...I know you're probably scared...but break it off. Or maybe you do really like her and are just lying to me. I don't know. Link to comment
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