Age for Sex?

[rosephase]

I was wondering what you all think might be the right age for your first time. I know we are all different and having the right partner mean everything, but feel like I know a handful of people that are sexual confused because they where sexual to early as well as a few dear friend that are screwed up because they are still virgins later in life. Obviously there isn't one right answer, but I want to know what other people think.

[SapphireNoir10]

Id say, over eighteen, and make sure your in a loving mature relationships. But then those have a tendency to turn nasty before you even know it. Its a huge risk. My first dumped me straight after, I thought he loved me, he turned out to be gay. I regret it every day of my life. I then said my next boyfriend truly counted as my first because he was the first boyfriend I had PROPER sex with...its complicated.

 

There is no right age. Just be mentally prepared.

[livefree]

Geesh...depends who it is, if its my little sister, never! I think it really depends on the maturity of the individual, and the ability for them to make the decision for the right reasons. Do I think I had the capacity to make that decision when I lost my virginity at 15? No! I don't regret it any more, but still, it would've been nice to wait. Typically I'd just say follow the law, but I mean, that doesn't mean laws are always right

[thejigsup]

My first time was when I was sixteen. The guy was in his thrities. It hasn't seemed to harm my any at all! What did happen is that I learned how to really enjoy sex at a young age and how to differentiate between love and lust. Many women don't learn these things, so I guess I was pretty lucky! I don't know if I'd advise any young woman to go that route, though. I was a pretty hep kitty at the time and was fairly worldly wise. A more innocent, trusting, girl may have been badly hurt.

[highonyou]

My first time was when I was 16 (just legal in the UK), with a guy I met at a friends party. Such a big fat mistake. I grieved a bit afterwards, but accepted it was a mistake and I had to learn from it. I was not mentally prepared, being drunk at the time made it worse, i think.

 

Since then I have been very careful with whom I have slept with - got into a proper relationship first - but i still think it would have been nice to wait 'til I met my loving bf 2 years later.

[blindfold]

I was kinda young - 14. It is legal here, since we were both minors. But it felt really right - I did it with my boyfriend at the time, who was my best friend, and we kept our friendship for a few years after that. It was kind of awesome... I was young as hell, but that didn't mean I wasn't ready or didn't love him enough (god knows I did). So, no, I don't regret it.

[CynicalGuitarist]

I used to think differently, but maybe the sooner the better. Hell, it might really help one's self-esteem in this depraived world.

[highonyou]

Maybe losing your virginity is just one of those situations where you either regret it afterwards or you don't.

 

A couple of my closest girlfriends have been totally in love with the guys they were with, but still had that feeling of regret afterwards.

[Superfreak]

18 sounds good to me, although as far as the laws are concerned, I think about 16 is fine. But their's no real answer aside from "Age xx feels about right".

[AbsentMaverick]

I was wondering what you all think might be the right age for your first time. I know we are all different and having the right partner mean everything, but feel like I know a handful of people that are sexual confused because they where sexual to early as well as a few dear friend that are screwed up because they are still virgins later in life. Obviously there isn't one right answer, but I want to know what other people think.

 

What exactly do you mean by 'right'?

[sweetsally]

If I put away my biases, then at 18yrs I think your old enough. But personally, I am waiting until I am married.

[CandyKins]

I'll say about 17 or 18. It's important that you're physically ready and developed.

[yeawutever]

I think that 18 and over is the right age. Afterall you are then of legal age in that moment. I was 19 when I lost it and yea mom made a big deal about it at first, it's my relationship anyways not hers.

 

However if you're gonna do it always do it with protection and make sure you're ready.

[dragon lady]

I'm so surprised at my response back then. I definitely think I was fine at that age. Must have been having a down moment.

 

edit: age of consent where I grew up was 16. Does that make 16 the right age there?

 

I just don't think there can be a "right age." Everyone has different circumstances and maturity levels.

[laisla]

everybody is an individual and it doesn't make it wrong to have sex at 16 or 24. i'll just say 18.

[Cognitive_Canine]

Over 18 is a good time.

[forever1130]

Wow! I can't even imagine having sex at like 14 or 15. I just turned 18 about a week ago and still don't think I'm completely ready to take that next step.

 

Its complicated cause I know I'm gonna have sex eventually so keep putting it off and waiting? Especially when I have an amazing boyfriend of over a year that has waited for me this long. But on the other hand, I just don't know if I'm ready so I feel like I should wait.

 

I think I'm afraid of regretting it like a lot of those who have posted on here saying they regret doing it at such a young age, but I guess there's the possibility that I might regret not doing it sooner and missing out this whole time... I guess I won't know till it happens!

[laisla]

^ i did it when i was nearly 20, i was completely ready for it and have no regrets. i wasn't desperate to do it either...i could have waited longer without feeling like i was missing anything. it was the right time.

[JeckyllNHyde]

I cringe when I hear about 14 yr olds having sex. They're still KIDS in my opinion, but of course it's just that... an opinion.

I dunno, I just think it's horrble the way some 20 somethng yr old guys can bring themselves to have sex with such young girls, even though they may look 18.

 

I'll say the "right" age is 18. Maybe 19. I guess it depends on emotional maturity too. I developed late in that sense. At 17 I felt no where near ready.

[forever1130]

That's how I feel, take it or leave it, its not really a big deal at this point in my life cause I don't know what I'm missing out on since I've never done it. And I know my boyfriend will wait till I'm ready but I almost feel bad making him wait so long in the process... sometimes I still can't believe he's waited this long for me, I didn't think it was possible for a guy to go over a year without sex, but I guess I was wrong lol

[yellowcal]

I think that 18 and over is the right age. Afterall you are then of legal age in that moment. I was 19 when I lost it and yea mom made a big deal about it at first, it's my relationship anyways not hers.

 

However if you're gonna do it always do it with protection and make sure you're ready.

 

18 isn't the universal "legal" age so just going by the "legal" age is crazy. (Not saying you are just pointing out the flaw is saying 18 because it's "legal"). In places where 14-16 is legal, would you lower the age and say 14-16 is the right age because it's legal?

 

For me, it depends on the maturity of the person, the reason why they want to have and so many other factors. I had sex at 15 and I was ready and don't regret it. I know people who had sex at my age and it was a mistake but i've also known people who had sex at an older age and still regret it. So ultimately a person can't really say there is a right or wrong age. As long as the person is old enough to understand the concept and consequences of their actions. Have fun, be safe.

[yeawutever]

18 isn't the universal "legal" age so just going by the "legal" age is crazy. (Not saying you are just pointing out the flaw is saying 18 because it's "legal"). In places where 14-16 is legal, would you lower the age and say 14-16 is the right age because it's legal?

 

Not only because it's the legal age but because it makes sense. That's usually the age when people graduate from high school and many move out away from their parents. So no if it was 14-16 I would say you're still a kid, thus that's too young to be thinking about doing that.

[yellowcal]

Not only because it's the legal age but because it makes sense. That's usually the age when people graduate from high school and many move out away from their parents. So no if it was 14-16 I would say you're still a kid, thus that's too young to be thinking about doing that.

 

So just because 18 is the age people graduate from school it makes it the right age? How about just knocking it up and saying 21 is the right age because that is about the age most people who are going through college graduate? Or maybe 24 that way they can graduate college and get a good job before having sex? I mean atleast give some ambition if you want to have some kind of reasoning behind it being "right". Graduation doesn't make one person more mature. Also, the average person doesn't move out of their parents house at 18. So while I understand what you are trying to say, the reasoning behind your 'argument' still has flaws.

 

But by your standards (Just for example/instance..) I graduated school at 16, are you saying that since I graduated school, even tho I was only 16 it's ok for me to have sex just because I have graduated school or it's wrong because even though I have graduated i'm still a "kid"?

 

You can't really put an age on something like this and say a certain age is "right"

[yeawutever]

Also, the average person doesn't move out of their parents house at 18. So while I understand what you are trying to say, the reasoning behind your 'argument' still has flaws.

 

Some do at that age, one of my friend did after she graduated. Then again it also depends on what you working as and if you're able to maintain yourself, where and if you have free tuition for college. But no you won't hear that much of a 25 year-old or older still living with his/her. Now that would be somewhat weird, unless they are poor with no money.

 

But by your standards (Just for example/instance..) I graduated school at 16, are you saying that since I graduated school, even tho I was only 16 it's ok for me to have sex just because I have graduated school or it's wrong because even though I have graduated i'm still a "kid"?

 

In that case you would still be considered a kid since you're still a minor.

[JadedStar]

I am always going to give the politically correct answer to this question and say 18 but also know that realistically this doesn't always happen.