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JeckyllNHyde

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Everything posted by JeckyllNHyde

  1. glad it went ok... and that you guys are in no rush.
  2. If you feel shy you can also make a hand made card and give it to her.. I find that wayyyyyyy less intimidating lol. Good luck.
  3. awwwwwwwwwww!! i love the last lines.. though u do "Tease" her in the ret of the poem, i think it's good you made it light and fun. nothing too over the top. working on the romance huh? *thumbs up*
  4. omg.. u guys broke up? im so sorry ave..
  5. Ok. Well just start the poem, and we'll critique as so many have already said. To be honest yea we didn't need the pic. You could have also said she had deep blue eyes, and black hair. Easy. Neways, best of luck with the poem, write it from the heart about her. Try and write some words about her like blue, black, and whatever else you associate with her. Then find words which rhyme with THOSE^^ words. And put them into sentences. Easy way to make a poem. Oh and we don't know her that well to make a poem about her and her character, only you do.
  6. Good luck lil baby girl. I hope they understand you.
  7. I don't know what I would do if I were in a marriage and cheated. Hopefully I never get myself into this situation. But if I cheated on a bf, I wouldn't tell (so I don't bruise the ego.. and perhaps I am a coward too to be looked down on) but I would break up with the person. To me it means that there is something missing in the relationship (not blaming my partner, just that maybe they aren't "the one") or I am not ready to be with the person/anyone. Not only did I break the trust but I'm lying to the other person when I expect them not to lie to me. Plus if I got away with cheating and fooling around with someone once, what would stop me from doing it again. Wouldn't want to go down that path.
  8. Yes, thanks for sharing. I too agree that for 14 years you are quite talented and it won't offend anyone. I thought from seeing your journals that maybe you where the one batteling anorexia. I am glad to hear that this is not the case. I hope you can manage to find a cure for your ED so that it never escalates to the point of anorexia or bullemia...
  9. it does not matter. you can start whenever you feel you need to.
  10. day "i dont know" of NC... well, as you can see i stopped counting the days as i am losing track. i finally realised today that it is hurting alot less. i am slowly starting to get thru the days without yearning that maybe he will call me. i deleted him from my MSN but didnt block him. it is still ste forward for me, since he blocked me right away and i was waiting for him to unblock *sigh* what has also helped me move in the right direction is that after attempting to lose some pounds for yearsss (and always failing due to lack of motivation/quiting/not enough knowledge/giving into temptation) i never managed to lose any weight when i really put in effort, and during the last 2 weeks, i lost 4 lbs!! for me this is a big whoop! since i only need to lose 10 more i think now... so another lesson for NC i learnt: aside from keeping busy it helps alot to set goals you want to achieve, and really focus on it and learn as much as you can about it to get ahead. if you have friends working towards the same goal it helps even more. you can swap tips, or just talk alot about it and tell each other about your progress, etc. it can be anything from fitness, to insruments, or cooking, etc etc...
  11. It's day thirty something of NC... Feels a bit sad to remember how me and him used to talk everyday and now nothing. I am getting along fine though, even though yesterday I had a dream about meeting him and his ex at an airport while on vacation. I guess it's just best not to think of him. I am going to try and redirect my thoughts everytime I start thinking of him.
  12. Day 31 of NC... WOOT! Made it, and off course am going to stick to it. Mainly b/c I wouldn't really know what to say or how anything I say would be received. I do however have a few scenario's in my head, and they aren't too pleasant, so no need to turn the responses I imagined into actual facts I went back to the gym, and am loving being back at uni. Am slowly getting my life into order and better then it has ever been (waking up early, attending classes & paying attention instead of skipping them as I have done for years, pushing myself to stop eating excess junkfood and going to the gym. I have always been a slacker, taking it easy everywhere I can). After reading threads I am also working on it to "stamp" it in my head that he probably isn't coming back (so that this NC will truly "heal" me).
  13. Day 29 of NC... Miss him like hell. Now that school finally started I thought I would be busy with that and completely focussed. But for some reason which I can't explain... Ok maybe it's b/c I see happy couples at school, or couples who are so disfunctional yet manage to stay together. It just makes me suddenly want to have someone to share myself with like I used to a few weeks ago. And normally even when I'm lonely or down I never feel this way in the presense of other couples or hearing about a friend in a relationship. I am usually happy and think: "awww... sweet... can't wait to find my special someone." Now I just feel sad. But don't want just anyone to "share myself with and love", once again... in my mind, at this point only HE will do. So I will just stay alone and not date some more until these feelings hopefully pass. Lost motivation to go to the gym, but tomorrow I will drag my butt back there after a whole week. Just feel so empty at the moment Kinda like you want to cry yet you can't. Look forward to the days when I am indifferent about the whole situation CONSTANTLY. Cause I hate these up and down low days. On top of it, for all I know maybe he doesn't think of me at all
  14. Day 26 of Nc... Haven't posted in a week.Been mostly going to the gym,hanging with my friends,trying to reach my fitness goals/eating healthier and these last 3 days SHOPPING.. yay! new stuff for me/uni (to wear).Had a lot of trouble falling asleep until 6am sometimes,but am trying to get it under control. Nothing better then buying new stuff (ONCE in a while) to make you feel better eh? For some reason new clothes make you feel somewhat "new" and ready for a better you/life. Am aproaching day 30 of NC soon.I admit,feels like its been way longer. The things I noticed so far: -still really miss him and talking to him. -don't care to go clubbing for now out of fear of bumping into the ex and also not in the mood to go out drinking and meeting guys. -have finally set out to achieve loads of goals I had put off (not b/c of this guy but just lack of motivation). -i dont want to date at the moment,which is definatly a weird feeling to me think even though we didn't date long I am just feeling disappointed with my dating life upto now that I would rather focus only on me.This break-up finally gave me the motivation to finally make the decision and stick to it.Feels like a weight has been lifted off my head,b/c seems in the past I would just get over it,move on and date someone new,get my hertbroken and then repeat the cycle in search of that "special someone".So now I am finally not out looking for a replacement and ending up with another disapointment.DEFINATLY a break thru. Sorry,just REALLY needed to vent.
  15. Day 18 of NC... Well, after reading Surfjons post about how he just dealt with it, it kind of woke me up a in a way. I have been all depressed, not wanting to wake up and get out of bed, didn't go to the gym today because i didn't feel like it and made a lame excuse to myself that "its too late to go now". Even while going out the break-up was on my mind yesterday. But later this evening I got inspired and decided to really set a goal for myself which involves REALLy getting into shape and losing the extra pounds around my midsection (FOR ONCE!! had tried it but have given up so many times). Really got into planning my workout routine and the good thing is that it's not easy to achieve it (since i never seem to lose/gain easily), so it really is taking effort on my part and will continue to when I try and stick to my healthy eating/working out/weight training. So I'm pretty pumped and excited about what the future has in store for me with this goal and my goals when uni starts again. And look forward to seeing if I will achieve these goals finally. **new lesson learned: when trying to get over someone it does wonders to find goals you want to achieve. your in the righ state of mind, its like someone has given you a "push" to just better yourself and go for it. it may be changes THAT person wont see, but it really doesn't matter, because YOU will see it.
  16. Day 16 of NC... Im doing ok. Just really still miss talking to the ex and seeing what he is upto, having our long talks... Dont really have an urge to contact him first though, specially since I wouldnt really know what to say or if he even thinks about me. Still cant really picture myself dating anyone new even though me and this guy only dated 2-3 months. Been going to the gym and also working on losing a few pounds like i have wanted to for quite some time. I still have a positive outlook on the future though
  17. Day 14 of NC... Wow, cant believe 2 weeks already past and I am still weirdly hopefull he will call. Or I guess I WAS. Been contemplating the changes in myself since dating this guy and during these past weeks. I definatly feel like I "know" where I want to go in life now, or what kind of life I want to lead. I went over to my buddies house yesterday and we played pool and drank and hung out all day. Super day, but he said he still saw "the heartbroken look in my eyes". Ah well... Today was the first time in AGES i made it to the gym on a Saturday. Feeling of accomplishment! Also plan to start eating healthier and cutting down my junk food intake drasticly. to see how a break up forces/motivates you to better yourself (b/c i haven't been to the gym in almost a year i think). I have also given up the bar/nightclub scene since the break up (for now anyway). I would just like to be alone or hang out with my true/close friends instead of going out dancing and meeting the same friends over and over and being fake with them and meeting new guys who just seem to want one thing (not that all are like that). Just kind of enjoying my quiet nights in. I also realized today I am not planning on dating for now. I just want to focus on ME and getting my life a little bit more meaningfull and in order. A guy-friend tried to kiss me today and I just rejected him twice. I just have no urge/need/want to kiss anyone. A little weird but I know I will get over it when the right guy comes along or time has passed. The old single me would have done it since I AM after all am Single. But not the "new and improved me". Now no jumping into dating guys or kissing just anyone "because I can". I just feel a little, ok a LoT more guarded. Dunno if that's a good or bad thing... Feels right though
  18. Day 12 of NC... Finally went to the gym today after 'god knows how long' of putting it of. and since i am not working at my part-time job anymore, i finally feel like i did something productive again after some time. Especially for me and my health. Great feeling I still think about my ex of course and kinda want him back and still think there is a chance for us though Not now, maybe not this year but I still (sadly) think its possible seeing the reason we aren't together anymore. BUT i'm living for myself and helping myself get ahead in life and learn new things (about myself too). the fact that we were both NC right after we stopped dating has it's good and bad side for my moving on route. good: i had no chance to make a fool of myself and say stuff to look overly needy and all that stuff. really bad: i keep having paranoid thoughts, that he really did let me down gently and in reality he went back to his ex, didnt like me anymore, etc... i just keep having a whole bunch of scenario's popping in my head whenever i remember him, and its awfull, well at least is not based on facts.. and thats pretty much the only thing that puts a temporary small damper on my mood. But aside from that, its been a good day.. and many more to come i hope
  19. Day 11 of NC.... Well, its been an ok few days. i have been thinking of my ex. last night i dreamt about him and the cruel thing about the dream was... it was one of those dreams that actually feels SO real, that when you wake up you think it actually happened. i dont entirely remember the dream, but i do remember waking up so happy that my ex had decided to contact me and i dont remember the rest. but i got up ready to call him (thinking we were back together) and then i was like... ooh noo.. wait, that was a freakin dream? nooo..it was.. ah well.. so that was my dream, i guess it happened cause i was wondering last night if he just stopped contact right away etc b/c he was going back to his ex. the usual paranoid thoughts you get when you are in NC right after the break up. but i DO have to say, the thoughts have become less, and the need to hear from him as well. SURE, i would love a call, but i am getting by pretty darn fine... another apart from that i went to see the movie ratatouille (loved it), was very inspirational even though it was an animated cartoon. i have decided to persue my hobbied and become more ambitious after watching it my soon new hobbies: gourmet cooking, playing drums (yes!! has been a dream of mine since young) and general fitness. so i have been really excited about those plans. slowlybut surely i will get myself on the right track...
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