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dikaia880

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  1. dikaia880
    Thanks for the reply Dragon... I hear what your saying...I just gotta be patient and be friendly and have fun with her when I can...if it's love it will happen...if it's not love now or never was, it may never be, but then again it could be...what happens with me and her is the future and no one can know what happens...so I'll I can do is be the person she fell for in the first place and hope thats enough to keep hanging in there.... As for me and my "new" girlfriends plans in four months...at this point I'm not going to date anyone seriously if at all, because I don't want to move away on another girl for her to break my heart because "she misses me too much, and is sick of crying because she misses me" like my ex did! Thanks again... As for your situation...I think it's the same thing...you gave yourself good advice by giving me advice! best of luck!
  2. dikaia880
    I'm kinda hoping I can get my ex in bed...might remind her of the things I used to do to (and for) her! Oh well, it wouldn't make me feel any different, I'm in the dumps as it is, so at least it would give me some happy time...and who knows maybe she'd re-think the wanting to be alone! Oh who am I kidding...she'd just be getting what she wants...nothing serious, just the sex...but maybe I could work it back into a relationship okay enough about thinking of sex!
  3. dikaia880
    Why don't you just set your MSN or AOL setting to show your AWAY? you can still talk to who ever you want, but she'll think that your away from your computer...that why she won't think your ignoring her, just that your not there...Then maybe after a couple weeks or so take the setting off and see what happens? Hope that works for you best of luck!
  4. dikaia880
    Hey everybody...Since I've been gone awhile I just wanted to know how everyones doin? Hope all is good!
  5. dikaia880
    Okay...So here I am once again...I've posted the whole story in several places so I won't bother with the details other than this...Great relationship turned into long distance, which went great for four months, talk of marriage and long happy lives together, ect. (mostly by her) After two weeks of her being stressed/busy with school, she ends it...That was four months ago, since then she has given lots of mixed signals...then there was an email telling me she hasn't moved on, asking if I was seeing anyone, ect. Then she doesn't back any of that up...she says she's not ready for a serious relationship and wants to be alone, thats she's not seeing anyone... Well three weeks ago, I took a big chance and put my feelings out there one last time, and got shot down...it helped me for a couple weeks but this week has been hell trying to figure out what to do about it... So here's my question...As I will be going back there in four months for grad school, is there a way to keep her from moving on or at least keep whatever feelings for me she has from dying out so that I have a chance with her again? If so, how? Also, right before I put my feelings out there, the conversations had become awkward...mostly from me I think...How do you keep those coversations from being awkward, how do you keep your feelings from showing? I know I've asked a lot of advice from you all, but more would be appreciated!!! Thanks!
  6. dikaia880
    Oh boy do I know what you mean... She has even told me that she's never asked me to wait for her...but I feel like if I give up, then it just shows her we weren't right in the first place... It just seems like she has her head on straight at this point...that she's convinced she doesn't know what she wants and that not being with anyone is the best...somehow if I could shake that... I think the biggest thing is how do i hold on for three and a half or four months until i can always be there and have a much better chance with it... How do I keep her from moving on too far from me... The one thing I worry about going back to school now is this...While I know I am not going back for her, but for myself...how am I going to feel if things don't work out with me and her then? For right now I have some hope that in the future, but if I get back at it's obviously not going to happen or if she has someone else...I don't know how I'll feel, heck maybe I'll feel better...maybe it's my hope thats killing me... Somehow i have to make her comfortable in the next week and a half so that when I go up there for three days I can get a chance to hang out with her....I think last time I was up there she was hesitant to meet because things had been awkward...it will have been three weeks after I swung for the homer and stuck out so I can play that I'm over it and that it actually gave me the closure I told her I had been looking for...emails the way to go for now...I hate it though as she doesn't check her email from like friday to monday, leaves a lapse of conversation, but I think it's best if I get her to call me.... Oh wow I hate this!
  7. dikaia880
    I know spatz...it's like we're the same guy. After the big shot, I felt like I had the answers...She didn't want a serious relationship and that the long distance would make it even harder to get back together if she did... But then answers bring more questions...Mainly, Why? But things like...she said she doesn't know what will happen in the future, and when she does want to date I'd be the first to know (what the hell does that mean?) She emails me little jokes, why? Why do you want us to be friends and be able to talk about anything at all? A friend of my roommate is this smoking hot blonde...she wants me, bad...but all it does is make me think of the ex...isn't that supposed to get me over the ex? Another friend of mine says "even though she knows you're going back to school, she wants push you away and see if you still go back thinking you two don't have a future...that way she knows your not going back for her." Is there any logic to that? I'm sick of all these questions and thoughts that float around my head... Did she tell me she's not dating anyone and doesn't want a relationship so as not to hurt me? or is that the truth... Now that I've waken up a bit I'm not in such a bad mood as I was, but she's still on my mind...only four hours then I can get the hell out of here and go to the gym and forget her for awhile... Do you think I'm best off playing the email game for awhile...light hearted jokes and such? I really want to talk to her, but I'm going to wait until she calls...I'd feel weird calling her first I think.
  8. dikaia880
    Hey Spatz... to be honest I don't even get that 15 seconds of happiness...As soon as that alarm goes off I know it's another day of sitting at my desk getting nothing done (if there is anything to get done) and thinking of her. All the things she said when we were together about marriage, spending a long happy life together and all that...then all the things she's said since about not wanting a serious relationship and that sort of thing... I can't understand how you could feel one way and then so suddenly change... When we started talking again after the first couple weeks of no contact, I could have used it for good, now I realize that I was awkward about things at times and that messed it up for me... I don't know how to get around that...I don't know how to just be her friend, All I want at this point is for it to be August so i can go back and try to win her back, but I don't know if I can... I have the hardest time putting myself in a good mood...how can I get her to see we're right together if I can't be happy? I don't know how to be happy...the only time I can forget about her is that hour and a half when i'm at the gym... When I go up there I'll want to see her, but I don't know if she'll want to see me...I could try to ask her to that party, but she may just see it as me trying to get her back, being that it will be our (or would have been) our anniversary... I thought I was done with this lack of confidence bull...but I guess when i swung for that homer and got shot down it hurt me more than I thought...We've only talked once since then...she also sent me an email asking "Why is it an easter bunny when he lays eggs? shouldn't be an easter chicken?" I sent her an email Sunday night...I asked her what is the Hokey Pokey really all about...she sent back an email and at the end she said it made her laugh out loud and people were looking at her funny... Maybe I just have to keep up the fun emails and hope that it makes her want to call me.... I'm feeling sick of all this...almost physically ill at times... When I was with her my life was the best it had ever been, now it's been the worst four months of my life (literally) and i don't see the light at then end of the tunnel... Well off to a meeting...hope your all doing well
  9. dikaia880
    Hey all, It's been awhile since I've been here and don't have time right now to catch up on all I've missed... The past couple days have sort of been hell for me...I had a dream about my ex sunday night, I hate that the only place I can hold her is in my dreams...well for the past couple nights, it's the same dream...just me and her holding each other and looking into each other's eyes...then dream has ended the same way the past three nights, the alarm clock goes off and I have to go to work. Its been four months now...I can't believe it's been that long. The other thing thats dragging me down is that it was this time last year when we met. In a week and a half I'll be visiting my buddies back at the uni, it's the big end of the year party, which happens to be what our first date was...I'll be up there trying to party and have fun, but I'm sure all I'll think about is how it should be our one year anniversary....the next couple weeks are going to be hell...I'm sick of this, i'm sick of my life at this point... Sorry about the depressive post, two weeks ago you would have thought I'd never be doing it again...but it's funny how one little dream or thought can make you slip into thinking of them all the time...Hope everyone is doing better than me!
  10. dikaia880
    Hey all, I was reading about how you guys no longer "think of them first thing in the morning" and all that... I wish I could say that....it still seems to me that the first thing I think of is her... Little mundane thoughts about anything going on in my life always turn into thinking of her. I lie in bed at night, daydreaming about my "happy place" so I don't think of her, but it seems that every night I find her in my dreams...but it's okay, because in my dreams she's always mine...it makes me smile. It does not hurt anymore...I'm happy knowing that in four months, I may have a chance to get back together with her, or at least see her regularily... I'm happy knowing that in those four months I will be in 10 times better shape I was when we broke up. For the first time in about 3 months, my life is starting to go my way again...Grad school in the fall, I'll have time for another "real" job back there, it's almost summer time (looking forward to wakeboarding and just sitting on the dock at the lake, sipping a cold drink!) As much as I miss her I've realised it's a great time to be alive, so I won't let this time slip by like I have some many times before, life is too short to let the way things go bring you down! Hope you all feel the same way, and if not I hope you can real soon!
  11. dikaia880
    GeeCee, what the H@#l is cerise? Maybe It's just because I'm a guy, but I did work at a hardware store mixing paint and I have never heard of it? Hows everyone doing? GeeCee, I'll be surprised if you don't just build a new house all by yourself, you seem to have all the energy in the world right now!!! Keep it up!
  12. dikaia880
    Actions do speak louder than words...you said you were walking away...now walk away...at least for awhile, let her realise you we serious, that it be like other times...that you won't be coming back without her asking you too. As far as the conversation...it's a lot like what I did about a week ago...you'll feel better, trust me...also you cannot go back and write it off as you being drunk. Remember "The drunk man's words are the Sober man's thoughts" Best of luck Spatz!
  13. dikaia880
    Hey GeeCee...yeah bosslady is here...oh well. I've been good, upbeat most of the time... When I was home for easter my sister in law showed me her new scrapbook which unfortunately had pictures of me and my ex at the cabin...hadn't seen those pictures before, she looks amazing in them and I just sort of fell down emotionally...but I've been working out and keeping busy, doing quasi-no contact, but not awhole lot at all. My grad school is falling in place perfectly, i registered for classes and it leaves me time in the day to get another "real" job and make the same as I am here...so really by moving back I'm not giving anything up other than living in a place I don't want to be!!! How have you been GeeCee...hold on to your month of n/c your doing great, you set a goal now meet it!!! Hows everyone else? Gotta run! Take Care all!
  14. dikaia880
    wow, that sounds a lot like whats going on with me and my ex...it makes it soooooo hard...they tell you not to wait for them to figure out what they want and yet they call all the time...it makes it unbelievably hard to give up and unbelievably hard to move on...I hate it...sorry that your in my shoes too.
  15. dikaia880
    Hey...Your young...live it up while you can...don't pretend he's not there, let him know your there and let him know (through actions) that you don't give a *beep* what he's done to you... If he tries to talk to you, don't.... I'm telling you to do no contact, because he doesn't deserve to get to talk to you, not so you can make him miss you...If he does and tries to get back wit you don't...he's either playing you again, or he will in the future... Best of Luck!
  16. dikaia880
    oh Dikaism...hmmm... okay... "when life gives you lemons...make lemonade...if thats not good enough, add vodka..." hows that? I'll think of some more...I'll be home for the Easter weekend, but I'll catch up to you all sunday night... Have a great weekend! Happy Easter!
  17. dikaia880
    I'm not good at sugar coating things so this may come off rather blunt... This guy is simply bad news...He is not using this other girl to get back at you...what does he have to get back at you for...he's the cheat, he's the bad one... GeeCee told you to use no contact...so your emotionally ready when time comes to talk with him... I say use no contact as a way to get the *beep* away from him...Guys like this ruin a lot of things for girls...don't let him... Nobody needs a guy like this in their life... After what he has done to you, it's obvious that he never loved you, and I may be wrong, but chances are this is not the first girl he cheated on you with...guys like that have a tendency to play around a lot... He won't change... You are young, seem very intelligent...when you go off to college find the guy that deserves you and understands your worth...do not let this guy keep playing you for a fool by wanting him back, or by even talking to him I know it's hard, but you will get over him, and after the shock of all this you will look back (just like I do at my ex-girl from high school) and realise just how bad a guy he is and how lucky you are to have found that out now. Sorry if that all came out harsh, it's not meant to be, it's just the truth as I see it.. Best of luck
  18. dikaia880
    Wow...I don't know what to tell you other than have fun on your trip and I hope everything works out for you! Best of luck....but of course luck is timing meeting preperation...are you prepared?
  19. dikaia880
    Thats a big ol' touche Sincerely..Ha ha, I love it! GeeCee you know we're here for you anytime... The boss ladies out today...nothing to do, nothing to do!
  20. dikaia880
    What made you think she wanted to get back together in the first place? Sorry about this all, but the best thing for you to do is forget her...she says she wants to be friends, but honestly her replies seem like she's saying it to be nice...If she played you why would you want her anyways?
  21. dikaia880
    GeeCee? Where have you been??? oh well, let me know how your doing...hopefully all is well!
  22. dikaia880
    Yeah, after the beginning of the week, my email and her response I know I can't expect anything until I'm at least back at school... She actually called because she had a bad day and wanted someone to talk to...it's nice to know I'm the one she called...I guess it just means I'm still the one she looks to for emotional support....I hope I can keep it that way until August and then see what happens... I just talked to her briefly...I figured I should at least call her back...she's working all night, but she said she might call afterwards...then it was weird at the end of the conversation she said, okay well call me later...I know she's working so I won't call but, we'll see if she calls...Oh well...I'm actually happy with were I'm at with her...I don't know what she wants...But I do know what she doesn't want (a serious relationship, or any relationship) and I'm okay with that...I know it wasn't me, it's her and thats better than wondering what the hell I did wrong... Where's GeeCee today??? I miss ya GeeCee!
  23. dikaia880
    Okay you know what... So as I'm asleep...at 2:00am...she calls me...I didn't answer, why should I? She leaves a message saying, "I know it's late...but I just wanted to talk, it's nothing serious, I work a lot this weekend so I don't know when I'll talk to you" What??? why do you "just want to talk" when it 2am and I have to be up at 6am??? I cannot understands this girl at all...
  24. dikaia880
    Great Job GeeCee!!! I'm on NC since monday...I'll let her call me, as she probably will, if not I'll be going back up there in a month to visit some buds...if no contact by then I might try to get a hold of her... To be honest everybody...this site has been a God send to me, but at the same time, before my boss yelled at me about internet at work...I would sit here all day hearing everyones stories, trying to figure mine out...I realized by being on it all the time, I couldn't get her off my mind...Well I still can't but...it's easier to think of her less and worry about whats going to happen less...So I won't be on here nearly as much...I know what I'll have to do to be with her...wait patiently until she's ready to be in a relationship and then work my charm "luck is preperation running into good timing!" I wish everyone the best, I think of all of you and your situations and I hope everything turns out the way we all want...if not I hope we find what it is we need somehow!
  25. dikaia880
    I guess I don't know where that leaves you...she's seems to be upset you're leaving...like maybe she thought she'd get to see you, but now not so much....hmmmm...I guess I don't know what to tell you... Hope everything works out for you though... Me, I took a big swing, laid my feelings out there, and got shut out... I have answers...theres no one else, but she doesn't feel she would make me happy right now, and she feels that she wouldn't be happy...She said she doesn't want a serious relationship and that she wants us to be friends and talk about anything without any awkwardness ( I think some awkwardness came from both of us, but mostly me I'm sure) But, and this could be a huge but, she says she doesn't know what happens in the future, or how she will feel...GeeCee backs me up on this one, as she read the reply email...my ex still cares but isn't in a position to want to be in a relationship....I guess thats why I posted this thread, I don't know if i can believe that or not...I will find out in 4 months though...She said when she's ready I'd be the first to know...but unfortunately that doesn't mean it'll be me that she wants...I'm going to sit back try to be friends with her and see her when I go visit my boys, hopefully when I get back to school things can change... Best of Luck to you Bamster...let me know how things are going!
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