LaHermes

I love that song PDN. It does sort of get into your head. Look up his version of The Girl with Faraway Eyes". You'll like it. News for you. Those fruit flies apparently have same DNA as humans (I am simplifying here). Was half listening to radio documentary as I worked last night about scientific research into these creatures. "Fruit fly: 60 percent identical These tiny winged creatures share common genes for many biological processes involved with growth and development. In fact, nearly 75 percent of genes that cause disease in humans are also found in fruit flies, making them good models for the study of human disease." (NASA) They're about to become genetic models for astronauts."

I'll be reading you PDN. You always make valuable and insightful contributions on the forums.

"“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.” ― Mark Twain "“The best fighter is never angry.” ― Lao Tzu

Different

Let's march out of this pandemic into the light. Leave the fear behind.

Gosh. But I suppose stuck indoors during Covid many would have turned to a hobby they might never have envisaged before. I fear that I am no domestic goddess lol. Mind you, I need to add that I am a competent cook, and I keep getting asked for my recipes, which are not many. Lol. Then again I'd love to have a live-in cook, and have the food put in front of me. I know, I am a lost cause. L

Good heavens! What is the world coming to lol. I can tell you none of the under 30s I know are into knitting, crochet etc. But I know of quite a few women in their 60s who are. With great difficulty my mother taught me to be able to sew on a button! She did beautiful embroidery, but long after she married.

LOL Bolt. I have never knitted, crocheted or quilted in my life. Wouldn't appeal to me.

""There are none so blind as those who will not see. The most deluded people are those who choose to ignore what they already know". "Desperation is like stealing from the Mafia: you stand a good chance of attracting the wrong attention." Douglas Horton

I so understand you Lolita. People are drawn to me (talking IRL here), and always were. Aaah, so often have heard that: "I wish I could be like you". "You aren't afraid of anything". etc. etc. I keep strict boundaries in place. Much as I feel compassion for so many (like your story of that hippy girl) I know I cannot save the world lol. And yes, those who try to copy me. And the many who have asked "could we touch your beautiful hair for a moment". It can all be so strange sometimes. I have a tougher core than people even imagine. I remember my husband once saying to me: "I've seen you annoyed sometimes, but I sure wouldn't like to be around if you ever got angry". However, I am more of the "don't get mad, get even" type. lol. Only difference is that my late parents were nothing like yours. I so miss them. Such stable, steady, honest, sincere people, who had lived interesting lives, and it showed. I wish they could have lived forever. It's easy to say, Lola, but try not to let your parents get to you. And Lolita, I also love old houses. Their beauty and atmosphere. But, yes, the upkeep is indeed a battle.

Absolutely best advice DF.

No idea, BF. What a person finds acceptable is acceptable. Never heard of that "classic divide". There are no taboos (re age). A grand-aunt of mine married a man of 51 when she was 23. Happily and they had five children. An uncle of 48 married a woman of 23. I know people married within quite a wide spectrum. Married couples where there is a 10, 12 and 15 age difference. And others where just a 3 or 4 years age difference. Maybe some people are of a more mature mindset than others.

Does this mean, Mel, that those of us who marry (me for example) are neither smart nor lucky? I think I am immensely lucky.

For the day that's in it: "“Sanity is not about confrontation. It's about filtering. Having a stable and happy life is about saying "no" to crazy people, not about inviting them in and then hoping that confrontations are going to make them sane.” ― Stefan Molyneux "In a free society, one does not have to deal with those who are irrational. One is free to avoid them." Ayn Rand

I was single, for a long time, because, well, I wanted to be single. I am ultra independent by nature. My family gave up on the idea of ever seeing me married. I travelled, worked hard, had a great social life, a few like-minded friends, and enjoyed (and still do) my alone time. Btw being married does not mean ceasing one's independence! Then again that depends on who you marry. To my family's astonishment I announced I was getting married. Who was this man able to win LaH's independent heart Lol. Being married is great, I don't have to ask my husband's permission to do anything, I have my space, as much as I want, as does he. I definitely have peace and freedom. Yes! Certainly no one tells me what to eat or not eat, or the time of day. There are no hard and fast rules. Come to think of it I should have married long before I did.

Right, OP. I see where you are. As you will see from some of the replies there are those who love being along, as in, living alone. There are many who do not like being along, living alone. Both standpoints are valid. Moving on to the topic of buying a house. Of course, part of owning a house is maintaining it. Everything in this life requires some work. I can reveal that I bought a house while still single. Mind you bought straight from the developer so no immediate huge maintenance demands. It was a good investment, and has since been sold. I would suggest you listen to your own counsel on such matters as buying property, or speak to an expert. "People" tend to say all manner of things.

So, I take it you have lived alone for ten years, OP. Yes? Do you mean you did not wish to live alone but circumstances imposed this state of affairs on you? And then the word "alone" can mean many things. "Alone" never seeing another human being is one thing. When single I had an apartment to myself, as in, did not share. Friends and family came and went, visiting. Yes, I was single for quite a long time, certainly more than ten years, and found it enjoyable. Then I married.

Anxiety and Avoidance: A Universal Treatment for Anxiety, Panic and Fear by Michael A. Tompkins "psychologist and anxiety disorder expert Michael Tompkins presents a universal protocol to help you cope with anxiety, panic, and fear, "

To ponder on OP: "Life is short. Don't do the same thing everyone else is doing - that's such a herd mentality. And don't do something that's two percent better than the other person. Do something that changes the world. Oren Etzioni "Life is short and we have never too much time for gladdening the hearts of those who are travelling the dark journey with us. Oh be swift to love, make haste to be kind" Henri Frederic Amiel

To which I might add that every single day is precious. Fill the day with as much as you can pack in, joyous experiences, constructive stuff, stop and smell those flowers in your garden or in the park, stand outside for a few moments at midnight at look up at the stars. Stop that weasel circling inside your head, sit down and savour a good coffee, tea, or whatever. The years do pass quickly. All the more reason to live every day, live "in" every day.

Oh, to be 23 again! L. I cannot recall having these ruminations at 23 or indeed at any other age. People do not detiorate at 30. Nowadays 30 is very young. 50 is the new 30. I know a few people who continue to run their own business in their early 80s! Chronological age is largely meaningless. Just a number.

It will, assuredly, Jib. And that great wide ground will be far more solid and reassuring that what you are standing on now. Good luck!

One is never completely alone HK. I took off into the relatively unknown at age 20, and if I could do it so can you. One thing is for sure: if you decide on Dublin (the city of my birth, and also where I was educated) you certainly will not be alone for long. Lol. Dublin is very expensive (Ireland is the second most expensive country in Europe) but you do not have to live in the city centre and in County Dublin one can still find relatively reasonably priced accommodation. There is a housing and accommodation shortage which has led to the rising rent prices. But the city on the Liffey has much to offer and those drawn under its spell find it hard to leave.