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melancholy123

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Everything posted by melancholy123

  1. I think you are probably in shock and her loss hasn't actually hit you yet. Be kind to yourself and remember we all grieve differently. It doesn't mean you are wrong or bad to not feel much of anything. My mother and I had a bad relationship for decades and I felt nothing when she died, and 10 yrs later I still dont feel bad. Dont beat yourself up.
  2. OMG are you actually that shallow? You cant change people, they have to want to change. Maybe he is fine with how he looks. You need to let this go and move on to someone who meets your requirements.
  3. This post is bizarre. Are you always this jealous and suspicious? They cant do much in 10 minutes if something was going on!
  4. OMG! Slow down! Date 2 and you want to get her in bed! ***? Like others said, go for a walk, get outside. Dont try to get laid so fast, you will most likely scare her away. Much too soon for this.
  5. You need to dump his sorry ass and find a guy who is decent and not a liar.
  6. When I learned to stop worrying about what others thought of me and what I did or said my life got a lot better. I tried to tow the line and do all the typical things my mother thought I should do with my life even tho they didnt work for me. I stopped trying to be what others wanted me to be and worked on being what I wanted to be. Then I became a lot happier. I am not interested in trying to be better than anyone, keep up with the Jones's etc. I do what works for me! Learn to be yourself and dont dwell on what others want or expect you to do.
  7. My brother and his wife never had kids as they didnt want them. My neighbours dont have kids as they didnt want them. Many of. my friends dont have kids, they didnt want them. There is nothing wrong with that choice. Sometimes I wish I never had kids, I have 2 grown kids. I love them but my life could have been a lot simpler if I didnt.
  8. He needs to get help for his own depression, you cant fix him. I'd walk away if I was you.
  9. My son was at home til about 22 and he was in college a lot of that time and came home when school ended. He was a slob in his own room and I used to get on him to tidy up but he just didnt care if it was a mess. So along as his door was closed I didnt care. He did pick up after himself in the rest of the house as he knew he had to. We had our battles about chores like mowing the lawn, shovelling snow etc and he learned he had to do it as part of being in the family. He learned to do his own laundry at 13 and was good about that. I suggest you sit your kid down and tell her as long as she does not have a job she needs to contribute to the household by doing X chores. Give her a list, tidy up, vacuum, wash dishes or load or unload the dishwasher, do her own laundry. Whatever you think is reasonable. Point out she can help out or she can leave. My son did nothing after a return from college and about a month into his laziness I said get a job or go back to school. He signed up for another college course. You are supposed to be in charge here, not her. Develop a backbone and assign some chores along with consequences if they aren't done.
  10. This ^^^. The guy is an abusive jerk who is alienating you from your family. Do you really want to live like this? He sounds awful.
  11. You really need to develop a backbone and send this loud mouth jerk packing. Kick his sorry butt to the curb along with his junk. You know full well his yelling and cussing is not how people talk to other people. Only jerks do that. Get rid of him before your landlord gets rid of you.
  12. My husband does something like this. He divides his days into time for the main things he wants to do and accomplish. He can easily get raked in and over focus on one thing to the detriment of other things. He works his day in hourly segments, you could try that, or use a calendar if you think that would be better.
  13. You cant expect a young woman of 22 to decide totally that she does or does not want children, she is just too young. With such a vast difference in life goals, this is not going to work. I think you should move on and find a woman who is older than this young woman and who is of the same mind set as you regarding children.
  14. I say ask him to go to the wedding with you. Make clear you have no intentions on anything major happening.
  15. I hope you stick to that plan. You assumed too much and it backfired. She should not have agreed to meet up with you since she had a new bf. Learn from this and move on. If you haven't blocked her, please do that NOW.
  16. I agree with the others, this is not for you.
  17. Maybe he too thinks you need to get your own ice cream if you want it that much. Dont be so lazy, get your own.
  18. You ask why would he do this. Well, why did Brian Laundrie most likely kill Gabby Petito? Because he is nuts.
  19. You are the jerk here. She makes you food you dont want then you want her to bring food later, she knows you want to get laid so she says no. Then you get another woman to come over to f*ck and then you ignore the first woman. No wonder she's PO'd with you! Leave her alone, you've done enough damage.
  20. My husband has a big trailer like you can put a car on to move it. He is a kind, generous person and that kindness and generosity bites him in the butt too often. A neighbour borrowed that trailer a couple of times and brought it back in good time. Then he borrowed it for "an hour" to take something to the dump. Well 3 days later it was not back and I was mad. I went to his house and he wasn't home so I taped a note to his front door telling him we needed the trailer back. The next day he brought it back and it wasl full of leaves and broken glass! He didnt even sweep it out. That was it, I am not one to lend things to begin with but my husband was and he finally saw that this guy takes advantage of people and that this has to end. A year or so later he came by wanting to borrow the trailer! Luckily it wasn't here at the time and I said so, and then added we dont lend things anymore. He left and hasn't come back since. That was about 2 yrs ago. Just done lend things to others that you expect to get back. Which is everything you have.
  21. I agree with Bothered. I think it's him doing all of these things. I really think you need to move out, take your stuff and be gone. Get a new phone with a new number. If he's pestering your relatives they can get new numbers too. This guy is a nut.
  22. Boy I'd be gone if I was you. I agree with others that she is the one who is likely cheating!
  23. You need to learn to not lend anything to anyone ever again. That is the big take-away from this. You can buy more books as it's 99% likely you will. never get the originals back. Since you are so PO'd about this, block and delete this person for good and move on. You cant do anything about this.
  24. Hopefully you have learned from this and will never unblock him again. Closure comes from yourself not another person. You admit he is the wrong guy for you and you learn from this and move on. Pay attention to your therapist!
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