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Thread: Not feeling appreciated

  1. #1

    Not feeling appreciated

    So me and my partner of 9 months has gone through a tough time - involving him lying to me, talking to other girls behind my back, lying to me about his steroid addiction. However, I tried to put the past behind me and forgive him. He promised me the world, saying he can’t wait to treat me, make me feel like a princess, take me everywhere. However nearly 2 months down the line and we’ve been on 1 date.... However he’s not even bothered to treat me for valentines, not even say the words to me as it’s something he doesn’t believe in. I’m supposed to be taking him away for a night for his birthday Sunday however I feel like i really shouldn’t. Why should I treat him when he can’t do anything for me? Would it be bad of me to end things before his birthday?
    Last edited by daniellejade; 02-14-2020 at 02:43 PM.

  2. #2
    Platinum Member reinventmyself's Avatar
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    Based on what you've shared, you have every reason to end this relationship.
    Your needs aren't getting met and he isn't even trying.
    It would be better to end it prior to his birthday, rather than pretending everything is ok when it's not.

    You are worried about his birthday and he can't be bothered to acknowledge you on Valentines day?

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    If you feel that you don't owe him anything and if you're ready to breakup now, I wouldn't splurge on his birthday if I were you. He has obviously shown his true colors to you by not bothering to put forth the effort to care for you not just for VD but he's a liar, talks to girls behind your back and lied about his steroid addiction. His character is dark, shady, intolerable, despicable and unacceptable.

    His talk is cheap. He promises the moon to you yet doesn't deliver. He's full of hot air.

    If you're truly ready to breakup now, then breakup now and save your time,labor and money. Celebrating his birthday won't change your bitter and resentful relationship with him. Why should you do all the giving and he does all the taking? He's taking you for granted and completely ignored you for VD today. What a guy!

    Listen to your gut. If your gut and intuition are telling you that you feel like you shouldn't take him away for the night for his birthday, then end things before his birthday and decrease your stress significantly IMHO.

  4. #4
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    Originally Posted by daniellejade
    So me and my partner of 9 months has gone through a tough time - involving him lying to me, talking to other girls behind my back, lying to me about his steroid addiction. However, I tried to put the past behind me and forgive him.
    This was a mistake.

    This man doesn't care about you. You are a place-filler for him, so you might as well end it now. It isn't going to last anyway, and you're missing out on opportunities to meet a great guy who actually respects you and likes you as much as you like him.

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Sorry to hear this. Sadly that is a lot of heartache and drama for 9 mos. End things asap. Do not reward this guy for treating you so poorly. Get away from this. If being a victim/martyr are recurrent issues, see a therapist for help.

    My advice remains the same regarding this guy and his steroid use: [Register to see the link]
    Originally Posted by daniellejade
    involving him lying to me, talking to other girls behind my back, lying to me about his steroid addiction. nearly 2 months down the line and we’ve been on 1 date.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member smackie9's Avatar
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    Hun actions speak louder than words!!!!!

  8. #7
    Super Moderator HeartGoesOn's Avatar
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    What advice would you give to a friend who was in this same situation? There's your answer...

  9. #8
    Platinum Member DancingFool's Avatar
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    It would be bad NOT to end things before the bday. It would be really bad to carry on with this charade for even one more hour.

    Addicts lie OP. Always, about everything. You are living a serious case of fool me once, fool me twice.....except he's fooled you much more that. Enough is enough. Dump him and be sure that you block him immediately from everything - social media, e-mails, phone. Do not answer any numbers you do not recognize. Go completely dark on him. If you give him even the slightest opening, you ca bet your life he will attempt to slither back into your life. Do not be flattered by that because it's just him fooling you yet again. End the madness for good.

    In the future, look at how the guy treats you. If he doesn't treat you or behave like you want, just dump him. Also, don't call this leach your partner. He is no partner to you and brings nothing to the table but lies.

  10. #9
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
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    The whole point of dating is to learn whether someone is a good match for us, or not. It's supposed to be a screening process, not partnering up with anyone who will have you and settling for whatever scraps they dish out.

    Skip that, and skip him. It's only been 9 months, so consider this a learning experience and question whether this is who you want to settle for?

    Head high, and raise your bar.

  11. #10
    Platinum Member Heather Dawn's Avatar
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    Nine months and this much trouble? I'd end the relationship and move on before you get any deeper.


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