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Heather Dawn

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Everything posted by Heather Dawn

  1. Hey, OP - where are you? I've got SO many questions...
  2. Your apartment is paid off - but he still has rent to pay for his. Why wouldn't you offer to pay 50% of the rent when you move in with him? You're not LOSING money on your own apartment if it's already paid off, so you're essentially asking him to foot the bill of what will now be a shared living space, while you just live for free.
  3. You're clearly not stupid - your post was well-written and structured, and you are obviously capable of introspection. You need to find yourself some help to work on the damage your abusive upbringing has caused. Contact your doctor (via a telehealth appointment right now) and ask for referrals to a therapist; a therapist will, in turn, be able to make other recommendations for you. Good luck!
  4. Hey all. Thanks to Batya for letting me know about this thread. Here in MA, we're pretty shut down but I'm waiting for (and hoping for) a shelter in place order. I'd rather have a month of that then drag this out for 6 months.
  5. As a parent, you should be more concerned with how they treat your child - and it sounds like they're treating him well.
  6. Nine months and this much trouble? I'd end the relationship and move on before you get any deeper.
  7. I think the idea of a "redeeming baby" is...strange. Any baby you do have in the future should not bear the responsibility of redeeming the pregnancy you lost, or your rape. You need to completely move past that before you even consider another child, lest you have a traumatic pregnancy and end up blaming him/her for causing you further emotional grief. Additionally, do you really want another child? Or are you simply having FOMO because of Facebook? Furthermore, you should not be blending your family if you're not even married and unsure as to whether or not you want to continue.
  8. My husband proposed, on one knee, on a street in Edinburgh, in the shadow of Edinburgh Castle. It was intimate, yet soooo romantic and I will never get tired of telling that story. A proposal in Paris sounds great! Get her a basic solitaire (worry more about quality than size) and then tell her she can add to it. My husband did that - he proposed with a beautiful diamond solitaire that had been a family ring, and then we chose a new setting for it together to make it ours.
  9. WOW!! Happy birthday to him. That's crazy!
  10. We do this. My little guy just turned three, and we've only ever left him with my mom - and only during the day when my husband's been at work and I've needed to go out without him. So what we do, instead of date nights out, is we instituted a strict bedtime once our son turned 2.5, and that gives us a few hours each evening to just be a couple. We watch TV, play video games, have sex...whatever we want.
  11. Absolutely speak with your doctor for some advice. Men don't always recognize depression for what it is - and that's why it's tricky. And almost no one realizes that men can have PPD. Not to mention, many people deny they're dealing with it out of shame or confusion, etc. I have a just-turned three-year-old, so it hasn't been that long since I've lived through the new baby phase. If you want to chat, feel free to message me. :)
  12. Sounds like he jacked off in the bathroom, and then put the brakes on when he returned. Just text him.
  13. Did you know that new fathers can also suffer depression? Maybe he can speak with his doctor.
  14. It's been a few months and you haven't met in person? Yeesh. He's probably lost interest and/or met someone in person.
  15. Do you actually have solid plans for the 3rd date (before you leave for vacation)? If so, don't worry about his lack of texts - just see how things go on the date; if not, then I'd agree that his lack of texting could indicate lack of interest (particularly now that you've slept together). And how long will you be on vacation? Is he going to be seeing other women while you're gone?
  16. Why should she wait for him to make plans? I think initiating it could be a good way of gauging his interest. Either he'll bite or she can move on.
  17. Awww! Love this! And I love that you're such a softy.
  18. I think you should stick to your original plan. You're an adult, and if your partner would prefer the holiday you'd previously discussed instead of one with your entire family, then she should be prioritized. And your family should understand.
  19. It actually sounds like your particularly school system is corrupt.
  20. She won't be able to lease if she has ty credit, anyway. In Jetta's case, a cheap used vehicle paid for with cash may be the only option available to her.
  21. OK, I work as a digital marketer for the automotive industry (and have for years) - AND I lease. The reason is simple - I enjoy having a brand new car every three years, especially with a little one to think of. I never come close to the yearly mileage allotment, and my car is never out of warranty. I have excellent credit and no debt, so I could buy if I wanted to - I don't. Some of the info above is inaccurate. You absolutely do not have to do maintenance on their schedule (but keeping your vehicle healthy is important, regardless), and there are not hidden fees. You can actually accrue equity in a lease in the sense that it can be put toward your next lease or financing if you purchase your lease. Yes, the dealers come out ahead in the big picture - but I can tell you that peace of mind about having a new, working, in-warranty car is worth it for me. I have a toddler, and never want to be without a working car. (My husband buys his, FTR.) Jetta, in your case, assuming you don't have good credit, I'd get a cheap used car.
  22. No matter how "disrespected" you feel, OP, you don't get between a mother and her child - especially one so young.
  23. I have a son who will be three in August. That's basically still a baby. They're going to be otherwise separated for two weeks - which is unfathomable to me - so if she can get some time with him during that period, she should.
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