MaggieMatsu Posted August 21, 2019 Share Posted August 21, 2019 I've officially been with my boyfriend for 4 months now but we dated a good while before then. Everything has been wonderful as it should be at the beginning but it appears the honeymoon period is well and truly over and the cracks are starting show. A good friend of mine said once that the cracks will always show after a few months but this is the make or break time as it's how we deal with them that determine our relationship. Here's where my problem comes in. A couple of weeks back he had an issue he brought up with me and we sat and talked it out and it was so refreshing. He said in a good relationship you talk about your problems (100% agree with that!) and we resolved the issue. Now a few days ago he made some "laddy banter" comments that actually upset me. I waited until we were alone and asked to talk to him about it and he kinda fobbed me off and he didn't talk to me the rest of the day. He was chatting to my cousin later that day and told her he was annoyed with me because I'm not driving yet (I'm currently learning and it bothers him that I haven't learnt before now as I'm in my late 20's but I don't see how that's his problem). The following day he started messaging me like normal and perhaps I should have left well enough alone but I was upset he spent the day before ignoring me and about what he'd been talking to my cousin about. I told him I knew he was frustrated with me about the driving but it's something we talked about before and he knows I'll get there. He said he was frustrated but there was more to it but when I asked what he just made a rather vague pointless comment. I asked if he was feeling like he didn't want to be with me anymore and he said no but then had a go at me for being upset with him over the "banter" and that if I wanted to have an argument we could. I didn't understand where that came from at all. I was actively trying to avoid an argument by talking things out but it feels like that's only something he's willing to do if it's him who has the problem. I have an issue and he flips it around on me like he can't handle being in the wrong. I could get past this and accept that this is just a part of who he is but what I can't stand is the silent treatment he's got me under ever since. He's sent me a stupid video on social media but when I tried talking to him (just normal stuff nothing to do with any of the argument) he gave me short one word answers and then made himself unavailable all day. I have no idea how to go about this. I've well and truly fallen for him and now I think I'm seeing another side that had I seen before would probably have stopped me from feeling that way. He's always been obviously quite self centred but it's never been nasty before. I don't want to throw it away if it's just a momentary thing or perhaps I'm simply overreacting and overthinking it? Link to comment
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