No interest or hard to get?

[reinventmyself]

Ok. . Having been brought up to date, we get the whole picture.

 

There's no stopping this train, so for the sake of moving fwd. . Slow-the-heck-down!

 

Bowling. You both are bad at it, so you have that in common. Nothing better than feeling awkward and clumsy to lighten the mood. You may even feel embarrassed, which makes you feel vulnerable and then have some laughs at your both of your own expenses.

 

And, for the love of whatever is holy. . . take your time!

 

Become her friend and get to know her first. (For some odd,reason I think he'll blow this advice off, but-)

 

She seems to have some sense of timing and what feels right for her. follow her lead and at the same time be smart about it.

[MissCanuck]

OP, based on your very recent and intense break-up - you need to slow down and not make the same mistakes you experienced last time. Get to this woman before diving up; you saw where diving in got you last time.

 

Pace yourself this time. Get to know her.

[2005TAHOE]

I hate to be the wet blanket in the group, but didn't you just break up with your fiancée in March? And according to that thread, you met her in July and got engaged in December. So you kind of have a history of moving very fast.

 

Plus, you were lamenting over your ex only about 10 days ago.

 

Don't be in so much of a hurry to ease your breakup pain with someone new that you make the mistake of rushing into a relationship again. Take time to get to know this woman.

 

I will and you are right, I see the bigger picture here and I appreciate your advice. My head says take it slow too.

[2005TAHOE]

Well, she just texted me saying that she was just waking up and has been sick all night, asking if we can reschedule tonight. :/

[boltnrun]

Well, she just texted me saying that she was just waking up and has been sick all night, asking if we can reschedule tonight. :/

 

Ok, well, it was just a second date. I presume you have dates with other women lined up, or that you are planning to date others, correct?

[2005TAHOE]

Ok, well, it was just a second date. I presume you have dates with other women lined up, or that you are planning to date others, correct?

 

I am, she didn't offer a reschedule date, but yes, I have made backup plans. I just don't know what to say to her, I haven't responded yet

[boltnrun]

I am, she didn't offer a reschedule date, but yes, I have made backup plans. I just don't know what to say to her, I haven't responded yet

 

"I'm sorry you're not feeling well. Maybe if you're feeling better next weekend we can try again."

[katrina1980]

You should txt back -- "rough night last night"?

 

Lol, Just kidding!!

 

I dunno, I mentioned earlier (post 15) but something sounds a bit off, she's playing games.

[boltnrun]

I actually think it's a good thing she cancelled. You're now being forced to dial it back a bit. Which is a smart thing to do anyway.

[2005TAHOE]

OK, Just got a thank you

[katrina1980]

OK, Just got a thank you

 

No offer to reschedule?

 

If not, move on, this isn't happening, sorry.

[2005TAHOE]

No offer to reschedule?

 

If not, move on, this isn't happening, sorry.

 

She asked if we could reschedule and I mentioned next weekend, I didn't respond to her thank you

[2005TAHOE]

Don't respond. You'll be annoying lol

 

Wait until it gets closer to next weekend and ask. If she doesn't agree, then I'd forget her.

 

I just feel like she has another date lined up, but it is what it is.

[Sportster2005]

When you have to wonder if they're interested, they're not. Her interest at best is mild. Wait until you find someone that is truly interested, and you're truly interested.

[Long Gone]

I just feel like she has another date lined up, but it is what it is.

 

Didn't I read you also had someone else lined up though? I may have misread that so apologies if so.

 

I'd wait to hear from her now, you said next weekend, it's up to her to get back to you on that.

[2005TAHOE]

Didn't I read you also had someone else lined up though? I may have misread that so apologies if so.

 

I'd wait to hear from her now, you said next weekend, it's up to her to get back to you on that.

 

I did but shes waiting to hear from a friend about going out.

[katrina1980]

Deleted, mis-read.

[katrina1980]

I did but shes waiting to hear from a friend about going out.

 

I agree with Sportster this woman is NOT interested.

 

If she were, she'd be jumping at the chance to see you again, not waiting to hear from a friend first before she agrees.

 

That is BS, and I called this from the beginning.

 

Sorry.

[boltnrun]

I agree with Sportster this woman is NOT interested.

 

If she were, she'd be jumping at the chance to see you again, not waiting to hear from a friend first before she agrees.

 

That is BS, and I called this from the beginning.

 

Sorry.

 

I think it's the second woman who is waiting to hear back from her friend before deciding. It's the woman from the first date who cancelled because she's sick.

[SherrySher]

If you are looking for a serious girlfriend, skip this one.

 

She sounds like she definitely multi-dates and might not be the most decent of women. She lied about wanting to go slow (and no doubt she doesn't go slow with other men either) and she lied about hiding her profile.

 

I personally would find another woman to date. This one sounds like she is not trustworthy and has been around.

[abitbroken]

If you are looking for a serious girlfriend, skip this one.

 

She sounds like she definitely multi-dates and might not be the most decent of women. She lied about wanting to go slow (and no doubt she doesn't go slow with other men either) and she lied about hiding her profile.

 

I personally would find another woman to date. This one sounds like she is not trustworthy and has been around.

 

On the same token, he needs to change his game. If he meets someone who he has never met before online - its a coffee meet, lunch, no thick romance of steakhouse, flowers and making out. That way he's not out to impress her or win her over. He already knows she wants to see him again after the first initial meet that isn't a real date. If he has known her for awhile in person and there is strong mutual interest (truly knows her -- not just shared a couple pleasantries at the take out counter), then moving to a "date date" is another matter.

 

i don't think we should pull out "she's not trustworthy". its a first date and its totally okay if she wasn't feeling the same way about him whether she didn't feel it was a match or felt a little pressured by the nature of the date.

[SherrySher]

Did you happen to read my reply? She is not trustworthy due to LYING. I will put it a bit more plainly.

 

She told him she would hide her dating profile...SHE LIED. She told him she wanted to go slow and then was all over him....SHE LIED.

 

This isn't up for debate, it's actual facts.

 

Lying=not trustworthy=he needs to find a better woman and dump this one.

[2005TAHOE]

Did you happen to read my reply? She is not trustworthy due to LYING. I will put it a bit more plainly.

 

She told him she would hide her dating profile...SHE LIED. She told him she wanted to go slow and then was all over him....SHE LIED.

 

This isn't up for debate, it's actual facts.

 

Lying=not trustworthy=he needs to find a better woman and dump this one.

 

After her thank you text for me hoping she feels better she went silent again. The next morning she texted me "good morning" I replied with the same and she went silent again.

[Wiseman2]

Did you reschedule yet? What was her response to that? What do you mean by "went silent"? That she didn't text back asap and you had to wait a few hours? Perhaps she'll suddenly get ill again if you don't stop the crowding, smothering, text-tethering, nonsense communication and hurry to bed her. Keep in mind after one date you both should be meeting others.

[2005TAHOE]

Did you reschedule yet? What was her response to that? What do you mean by "went silent"? That she didn't text back asap and you had to wait a few hours? Perhaps she'll suddenly get ill again if you don't stop the crowding, smothering, text-tethering, nonsense communication and hurry to bed her. Keep in mind after one date you both should be meeting others.

 

What do you mean smothering, crowding, non-sense communication?? I just responded to her good morning text with a "good morning" she never responded back to that and I sent nothing else. I mentioned Saturday that we could go out if she was feeling better by this weekend. Its up to her to let me know that.