Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[everybodyknows]

This wave of sadness is finally almost gone. It was really bad, but i'm on top of it now and just riding the rest of it out. i can't regret sending you that message, and today, i can honestly say that I don't. It wasn't the little girl who begged and pleaded with you not to leave her who wrote that message, it was actually me, and for the first time since we've broken up, i wrote the truth. No empty promises to change or swallow more trash from your family, no apologies for not portraying the "right" image, and no begging. I did it. And I didn't do it in a mean, sarcastic, or nasty manner, I'm proud of myself for that. As much as I thought I didn't know what to say to you, I did. As much as I was scared that I was going to leave something out, or that the message would be lengthy or too wordy, it wasn't. I hope you read it. Actually, I know you did. I don't really care what you think about it, I can honestly say that this time, I did it for me. For the first time in a long time, I feel a little more light hearted. Before, I worried that you would think I was crazy for saying what I did, or that my perception of you was inaccurate. Yes, the break up made me THAT insecure. I've realized now that I've lived with you, I've seen you at your best, and at your complete worst, and that yes, I did indeed once know you as a person. I can make those assertions about you, and be confident that my perception of you is correct, to ME, because it doesn't matter what you think anymore. I am going to get through this. I have a lot of really great things going for me in these next two weeks. And for the first time, ever, i feel like i'm going to be able to get through it because I now know I can handle it on my own. I gave and offered you so many pieces of me, and it maybe, no, probably, comforted you to know that you left me broken, but this is something that you just can't have.

[Stanfordxz]

I've never felt this used in my entire life. The one person I trusted in my life, has abandoned me. I gave you my heart for five years, and you shattered it within seconds. I hope you're happy with your new girlfriend. I hope that I never run into you again. Remember, that without me, you wouldn't have came as far as you have. I hope I haunt your dreams at night. I would have never imagined this happening. I hope your life sucks without me!!!!!!!

[Starrgrl]

Why did you have to call me tonight several times? WHY???

So you left a voicemail and curiosity got the better of me and I listened to it.

 

 

I cried.

 

 

I'm not gonna call you back. It's done. You should have thought about this before you chose to shatter my bloody heart.

 

I love you and it pains me to hear your voice.

[hairybda]

why do i miss you. why can't i fall asleep because i am thinking about you.. imaging having sex with you

 

how about when i left the island you had sex with another guy in santa fe in like what 1 week after

how about how you had sex with jonathan

how about how you had sex with ryan

and then your current boyfriend

 

your really not a nice lady

 

i wish you would leave my mind. you have done enough to me

[Philabonia]

My subconscious still has not let you go...I dream of a reconciliation, only to awake to an empty room. At first, the pain cut me deep, but now I am used to seeing you only when I sleep.

 

Why do I contort my life to keep you in it? I know you are far too gone to warrant any kind of hope. But still, I feel like I should care; I feel like someone has to, to validate the last few years of my life. If I just shrugged my shoulders and put this cross down, would you care at all?

 

5 months, Lo. 5 months of no contact from you in any sort of emotional way. You have never reached out to see how I am doing. What happened to you? Why are you so callous? This is not the person I knew; you are not the women I dream of. I know I did a lot of dumb things, but I deserved more than nothing at all. I deserved so much more than a lifetime of questions, with your only response being a single pair of footsteps, fading into the shadows of what has been.

 

In time, I expect you to think of me; I do not hold out hope, but I do realize that you are human. You will have your heart broken, and you will learn of empathy the hard way. And, in time, I might be able to be there for you to help you through that--that's not me being weak, thats called being a decent person. I will always be there for you, Lo; I love you just as much as I always have. I can forgive you for what you have done, but I doubt I can forget. I doubt I could ever give you a second chance; I've seen the worst side of you, and know what you are capable of.

 

I'd rather remember holding your hand as we drive those twisting mountain roads, surrounded by beauty as we cut through the crisp fall air. Those were our days; those were good days. I'll hold on to them, when no one else will. Who you were lives on in those memories, no matter who you are today.

 

God I love you.

[Yostina]

I wish I could cut you out of my life in a blink of an eye.

If we aren't going to try to make us, I want nothing from you but to leave me alone. Leave my heart. Leave my mind. Please.

I can't imagine my life without you by my side, but I will just have to face it, no other choice.

 

You sold me out H., and it kills in slow motion. I guarantee you that you will never meet someone who will ever love you like I did. And you know it. I just pray that one day you realize what you've lost and regret it for the rest of your life...

[emma j]

I HATE walking through that train station now.. it just feels cold and loney instead of how it used to feel when you used to pick me up and drop me off there.. i loved seeing your face as i walk from the train.. so happy that you where there and that i was yours.. now i walk through screaming inside that your not there.. Your not there, you never really where there..

[honesttoblog]

Y'know my friends really want to hurt you. They want you to feel the pain you put me through for 5 years. Both C and other C have said that if you come anywhere near me again they will muck you up so badly for what you did to me. I still have some of the scars from when you used to take your anger out on me. Did you mean to kiss me on the cheek last week? Or did you see me talking to her and realise that I was getting my life back on track and you thought you'd come and confuse me again? I rang C when you kissed me and she wanted to come back to school the day after just to make it obvious that you weren't to come near me again. You mucked me up/around so badly through all those 5 years and yet I know I'd die inside if my friends ever actually hurt you- and it's only because I still love you.

[AutumnBorn]

Hey, Loser Face, it was good to talk with you last night. I'm glad you called, but my five minute limit was up, so I had to go. When you asked why, I had to come up with something quick, so I said I had to make a phone call at 10. There was that sound of disappointment again. You think I was calling someone I'm seeing, huh? You're so weird.

[DeenasRhino]

I'm chucking my deuces up.

[fuddiduddy]

Still "very much in love" with me and think about us "all the time?"

 

I bought it when you texted me that nonsense last May and I haven't heard from you since except the "thanks" you sent me when your received my happy birthday text in August.

 

"Love." ....I now suspect you and your species have no idea what that odd thing feels like, do you? I believe ppl can fall out of love GRADUALLY. But your level of unwarranted disrespect towards me post-breakup was disgusting and embarrassing.

 

You made a clean cut and slid off ever so effortlessly--just a regular pro at these things, aren't you? And CLEARLY, you couldn't care less what I'm doing, how I'm doing or if I'm even still alive. The real tragedy is that I don't think you'll ever learn at this point. You're 45 for christsakes! No guilt, no remorse, no looking back. --I wouldn't be surprised if you can't even remember my last name.

 

I have no idea why you serial boyfriends (and girlfirends) always get off so easy. We never even had a chance to talk about it nor form any respectable closure. Well, *sigh*, here's an unfortunate confession that I'm loathe to admit: You and your deception, selfishness, and sudden cavalier non-chalance has permanently affected me and will be with me till my dying day.

 

Tragically, no matter how I try to move on and improve myself, you'll get to keep that bit of power. Even without knowing or caring.

[MissyMolly]

Feel free to never call me again.

[emma j]

I am so tired of dreaming about you. Seriously just get out of my head. I'm done thinking about you all the time.

[Yostina]

I'm weary. Please, feel me...

[honesttoblog]

Why do you still wear the neckless I brought for you if I mean nothing to you anymore? Oh also I found that 'expensive pure silver' ring you brought me for my last birthday to show that I meant more to you than she ever could- if you cared me about that much you wouldn't have tried to buy me off with jewellery. What am I meant to do with it now?

[SA2000]

DeenasRhino - Listen to the K.West verse on the Remix. Priceless!

[SA2000]

Nice shirt in your Facebook pic. Love that you still wear my shirts. Haha.

[manicdogbert]

I'm thinking back now. Remember the gifts I got you?

 

The picture frame that I got for you for our first Valentine's Day? The one where I went to Michael's and decorated the frame with figurines of fishes, footballs, and other things that you enjoyed? The one where I put excerpts from the first emails we sent each other and the first pictures of you and I. The one that you stored away shortly after I gave it to you. Remember?

 

How about the necklace that I got you for our third anniversary? The one that you wore for a few weeks and then left hanging in your closet for 3 years. I never did see it after we moved in together.

 

Even the Blu-Ray disc of Pixar short films that I got you for Christmas 2 years ago. Because you were so into Pixar films and you were excited to have a Blu-Ray player. The one you took the Christmas wrapping off of, thanked me and then put it on the shelf to gather dust. You never even opened it to watch the disc. I checked when I was packing. Shrinkwrap was still on it.

 

I guess paying a little gratitude or at least some kind of appreciation just wasn't in your blood. I guess it's like they say - Like father, like son.

 

Believe me, I may not have been everything you wanted in a boyfriend. But I can guarantee you that I was the best thing that happened to you. For your sake, I hope you never find that person you are looking for. If you do find the kind of boyfriend that you claimed you truly wanted - I wish you the best of luck in that totally shallow and meaningless relationship.

[SA2000]

Im trying my hardest to act like I'm OK.

[SemperRogue]

I miss you. I know I'm probably never gonna see that cute freckled nose wrinkle when you laugh but I miss that person. I miss the girl that brought me breakfast, just because, and rode stayed with me all day. I wish I could go back in time and relive some of those moments. Sadly I knew it would end and I really tried to remember each and every special moment. Its hard. I hate that my love came so late.

 

Right now I'm thinking about the time we went looking for Gobernador and drove all over the damn place. Gorgeous country and all I could do was worry about time and wish I had noticed how truly happy you were just to be with me. I want to go back to Silverton and see you face glow in amazement as we came down those killer turns. It was a beautiful place and with a beautiful woman. My god. I miss you and I hope it goes away soon. Can't stand being this moody and unproductive. Seems like all I do is half-ass stuff and wonder about you. I need to be on my way again and I don't quite know how.

 

Maybe I should swallow my pride and come find you. Nah, you are probably married by now and having a wonderful relationship with whatever his name is, weasel comes to mind. Anyway, I'm going to sleep now and I hope its a good sleep and I stop reaching out to touch your side of the bed. That really sucks.

[Starrgrl]

So I had a nap this afternoon and woke up to moonlight shining into my room. As I had my blinds up, I could see the moon tonight and wow, it was beautiful. The full moon was big and luminous- I smiled and felt at peace.

I made a wish (hahaha wishing upon a moon? Whoever thought of that) I feel good.

Really, I think I'm really starting to feel alot better. I'm letting you go.

It's crazy how the mind and heart works.

I started to feel dramatically better after you calls two nights ago.

 

T, YAY

I'm starting to see that light at the end of this long, pitch black tunnel.

I was lost. I felt like I was drowning in pain and shock awhile ago.

Now, it's like I have hope.

 

Thank you god!!!!

[iwantmeback]

I...I am missing you like crazy now. This is so hard for me. But doing LC and feeling the way I do and having to keep all my emotions in was too hard for me. I just couldnt continue like that.

[manicdogbert]

One of the (many) good things about going no contact is that I doubt I will ever run into you. Maybe never again. We don't like the same things. You wouldn't ever go to a concert of a band that I like. And I sure as hell wouldn't be caught dead in some stupid dance club that you enjoy. Right now, I'm just glad that we never had any cultural things in common. The only potential we would ever have in running into each other is if we ended up at the same restaurant. But thankfully, since I live a pretty good distance from you now, the chances of that happening are pretty slim.

[pyropinup]

that you can't even realize the contribution you made to our relationship. We have this huge fight and you say "yeah let's talk about this in a few weeks". Then when I call you you don't reply. I tried again a few weeks after that - no reply. Then we end up taking the same training together and you greet me like it's neutral, and I you. OK. I was feeling strong after talking it through therapy that you were narcissistic... I can be codependent but don't want to be. I felt strong. Then I see you looking at me during several times over the next week at the training. We even hold our gaze at each for a few seconds. Then you come sit next to me for one day and try to engage me in talking by saying you're hungover... We take a conflict resolution quiz that shows how we normally handle conflict and I see you looking at mine and then I look at yours and you say to me while smiling " I know what I need to work on". and I say the same. Then we laughed. Then you ask me if I wanted to punch you... How does violence solve anything? Is that how you solve all your problems? I reply "no" and you say good... Then after the training is done you leave and don't even say anything to me. You wave goodbye... I had a feeling you would do this =- that you wouldn't take the scary step of coming over and wanting to talk. I wonder if you were expecting me to come over because you waited awhile before driving away when I was outside. Don't you realize that I did try to communicate with you and that you denied me?

 

I see we wouldn't have made a good partnership anyway. I don't want to compete all the time with my partner.

[Live-N-Learn]

I know your not right for me but I still miss you. I hope this goes away soon. I am trying to move on and let go but it is hard. at least after 10 months of trying to get back together I now know it is over. Just trying now to accept it and rebuild my life. You brought me the greatest joy and the greatest pain. Not sure if I am happy or sad that I ever met you.