THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[Broken2009]

Day 7.

 

Definitely hasn't ever been this long not speaking to her at all.

 

It feels like it sucks but then I try to remind myself about how bad she treated me.

 

If I see her am I obligated to say Hi if she says hi first.

Or maybe I say hi first so it doesn't seem like I'm bitter.

 

does that break NC???

[Qut81]

Day 3

 

You know, ppl go thru worse things than this. Some ppl are married for 20 yrs, get divorced, and have to see their ex's SO bc of kids etc. I am sad bc my ex of only 6 months, has a new gf 7 mos later? Actually, I honestly think he waited this long bc he wanted to make sure I got over it. However, he cant hold his life up for me. There is NO way we are getting back together, I made such a fool out of myself I wouldnt even want to show my face to his friends and family. IT IS OVER.

 

 

Oh it takes a while but I do get back into reality. I am hot (not in a conceited way), smart, funny, no kids, great cook, and I can play the heck out of some video games. I am a catch and I may have some trust issues but Im so much better than this. I just found out last Sat he had someone else and I think I really needed a few days to freak out, cry, and get over it. Im going dancing tonight and who knows, maybe I will meet someone else. Like my friend said, his penis is not made of gold (the sex was amazing tho), he is not the greatest man on earth, I will live!!

[Broken2009]

I think it would actually hurt me to kiss someone else right now.

 

one minute I think I don't want her back at all, the next I am sobbing for my loss.

I think I am for the most part over it for a 12 hours than I am just a hurting mess. I don't know how it comes back, no matter how hard you try it just comes back. I don't think I will ever be truly completely over this.

I love her to death. Those bad bad thoughts are making their way back after being ok for a couple days.

 

I really do wish I never met her at all...

 

I just have to keep thinking anyone who doesn't want to be with me isn't worth my pain/thoughts anyway I just can't stop thinking about her, like even for a second it never leaves me and plagues me anywhere I go.

I hate this.

[looking4ward]

Starting day 3, woke a little sad but overall doing ok. Have a date then going out with friends later so should have plenty to keep me distracted. This weekend I will start moving as well which should keep me plenty busy. Gonna go roller blading later, work up a sweat and try to keep feeling good. I did look at his facebook, where he posted a status that I think might have been intended to make me jealous- that made me laugh actually, not jealous. At some point I will delete him as a "friend" but for now I'm not counting this as breaking NC.

 

-K

[wish_on_a_star]

Day 11...this second week hasn't been easy however I still maintained NC, beat my own record of 5 days so I am happy about that. The "what ifs" are still playing in the back of my mind though, anyone else wonder what will happen after they complete 30 days? Would you guys get back in touch with an ex if they said to you they would like to talk after that period of time, when things have cooled off?

[JonasWaingaro]

day...none again. I emailed and called today. It was awful and now things are...worse. She has so much anger though she claimed not to. Boo I am sad, I am lonely, I need a hug.

[JonasWaingaro]

Day 11...this second week hasn't been easy however I still maintained NC, beat my own record of 5 days so I am happy about that. The "what ifs" are still playing in the back of my mind though, anyone else wonder what will happen after they complete 30 days? Would you guys get back in touch with an ex if they said to you they would like to talk after that period of time, when things have cooled off?

 

Gawd I hope the 'what ifs' don't last that long. That would suck. And yes, I would talk of course I fell off the truck already. So that's...30 more days. gah

[JonasWaingaro]

Have a date then going out with friends later so should have plenty to keep me distracted. At some point I will delete him as a "friend" but for now I'm not counting this as breaking NC.

 

-K

 

wow a date! That's great! I wish I had your strength! I feel like I'm a giant wet blanket. All my friends have moved away so down to family for venting and all I talk about is this. Isn't that awful. I feel sorry for them having to listen at times, but it sure helps me. And checking out facebook doesn't break it! Though might make you want to break something. lol

[dimnickel1980]

never realized how many teal vans there are that look just like his. dying to go back to college. starting to look at guys without feeling weird.

[SunniDee]

I'm starting again. The divorce was finalized and things seemed pleasant so I unblocked communication and thought I'd stay nice and be friendly. Why did I think things would be different? He hasn't changed at all; it only took him 10 days to flip out full scale again and call me a monster, cold, heartless, and "detached like a psychotic person". Apparently he "never liked me as a person" either.

I am so tired of the emotional abuse and manipulation. No more nice SD. I'm legally divorced and in a good relationship with an awesome man. I don't need ex as a friend, he's poison.

 

Day 1 here. Re-instated the block on my phone, deleted the email account he contacted me on (he does not know what my new email is), blocked him on Facebook and MySpace, and blocked any websites I'd be tempted to visit and check on him at.

 

I'm not his momma. She's his partner in manipulation after all. I'm so done, time to focus on the good people in my life.

[FriendnorFoe]

day 86, just got back from vacation, was good to get away from things, but simultaneously my friend brought his g/f, I wanted to stay away from seeing them together. Its been a rough year on me, aside from the breakup there has been many troubles in my family life I could not ignore, sometimes my head feels like its going to explode, other times theres not a single thought in it, almost like its too much to worry about and it shuts down.

 

we broke in March, every now and then I get that anxious panicky feeling like I just got dumped yesterday and have to explain to meyself why things are the way they are. I go through these phases of thinking of an excuse to call her to see whats up, I def. have a few but I then snap back to reality.

 

I still see her in my dreams, the dreams however are no longer about breaking my heart, intially I played out hurtful scenarios of seeing her with another person, or being together again and something goes wrong, these days I will see her for a split second by a door, she looks at me and smiles and walks through it. I wish she was not in my dreams at all but this is much more tolerable.

 

Time heals all they say, it does, however its not gonna be one day you wake up and poof they are gone, its very gradual and hard, its been almost 5 months since the break and I still feel like I am on a rollercoaster sometimes, they will always be on the sideline in your head, I think it is nearly impossible to "forget" them, you just eventually realize it is what it is and thoughts of your ex just become easier to cope with.

[vertigoxo]

Couldn't sleep last night. But I managed for a few hours. I just woke up at 4PM, which made me kinda sad... I used to wake up around 11AM. Oh well...

 

He's still in my mind, somewhat. He's not in my dreams, thankfully, I can function everyday normally, and I can still enjoy life. I think nights for me are the hardest because we used to talk so much on the phone at night and now... it's quiet.

 

I wish he would text me soon so I can tell him to not contact me anymore. I don't care what he has to say to that. I don't care if he tries to manipulate me, guilt trip me, or try and twist my words around like last time; I'm just going to say what I have to say and move on.

 

Ugh. Being a teenager sucks.

[looking4ward]

3/4 of the way through day 3, still counting fractions of days. I am doing ok, probably drinking a little too much- it helps numb the feelings. I just feel so used and pathetic. He was not over his ex going in- I knew that and got involved anyway.

 

We were so happy together- then of course the ex relaizes he stopped caring so much about her selfish self and comes running back. It had been almost a year, I thought it would be ok to get involved but now I know- avoid people with ex issues!!!!!! They will break your heart. He emailed several times and I asked him not to until he was done travelling- he said lets talk about restarting our relationship when I get back, ugh!!! I need to get my head together.

 

Thanks for letting me rant

[quirky]

Day 4

 

I have never participated in this thread (I have been back and forth with my ex, never broke NC but wasn't strong enough when he did) but always made me moved, seeing people hurting but being strongs or just being human..

 

So it's day 4 for me and all these 4 days I have been angry and wanted to send an e-mail but I decided not to bother. I just hope the anger will subside.

 

But this time it's for realtill angry

[looking4ward]

Starting day 4. Feeling ok, went out with friends last night, flirted with boys- had an awesome time. I think a friend has a thing for me- it's flattering but I think I have enough guy baggage for this month thanks! Woke a little sad but that seems normal, then start to feel better later on

 

Keep it up everybody, we can do this, and we can feel good again!

[dimnickel1980]

missing having intimacy and a connection with someone. keep thinking about what he was like right before he left... makes me mad. losing hope everyday. want to be back at school.

[JonasWaingaro]

day 1, again. I feel sad, and can't settle down at all. How can I ever get over this...?

[Puckdog27]

day 1, again. I feel sad, and can't settle down at all. How can I ever get over this...?

 

First step, resist contacting her. Thats what generates some of the sadness, the rejection.

[quirky]

Day 5

 

Went to the beach, it's always at the back of my mind but I had a long chat with my friend which helps me heal. I don't know what I'd do without support from friends and family..

 

Still pissed off, a bit sad and very angry at myself.

[SunniDee]

Day 2. Everything is blocked so I can't even check up on him. Even so, I will be going into the cell store and changing my number on Tuesday. I just never want to have contact with him ever again. I was lying to myself to believe there was even a shred of hope that we could ever be friends again. I don't need people like that in my life.

[looking4ward]

Half way through day 4. Doing well right now

[JonasWaingaro]

First step, resist contacting her. Thats what generates some of the sadness, the rejection.

 

Indeed, I am trying! But I'm in such a weak state that I cave in. Then feel all bad again. And yay looking4ward! That made me smile! That sure is rare now so thanks!

[SunniDee]

His last actions were such a slap in the face that I am livid at him. I want to unblock him to give him a good verbal tongue lashing. (but I won't)

[DrowsyWithHope]

Hi, I'm new here! *waves*

 

I think I came accross this thread while doing a Google search on 'No Contact'. I can't believe this is still going almost 2 years after the original post! lol

 

Day #4 of NC.

 

I was doing NC for 2 months when my ex came back into my life. It started with a dozen roses and a phone call a few days later. I got the call most people hope to hear from their ex....that they are sorry and they have realized things and they want to make it work. (It's was a long term LDR). He flew to talk to me in person, we talked, got back together but it only lasted about a month and a half. This week he laid a bomb on me which broke my heart (again). He had NO BUSINESS coming back into my life and acting like this is what he wanted if he was uncertain about one very important issue. After 3 days of crying my eyes out and feeling those awful emotions that we have all felt (anger, hurt, disappointment, sadness and total disbelief that someone who loved us could let us down....), I told him that I was done with it.

 

I have not heard from him at all and he will be IGNORED if he does try to contact me. I'm writing in my journal alot, reading forums like this one and just trying to stay strong. Since I've done NC before I know I can get through this again. I have to say, over the years that we had been together my biggest fear was that it would be over for good and that I couldn't cope with that. Yeah, we'd been broken up and got back together many times before but it was like for a day or a week. So going NC for two months, I found it to be very empowering!!! It wasn't the end of the world and I didn't die!! lol Yes, the first week or so was absolute H**L!! You cry your eyes out, you feel tired, you feel angry, you feel sad, you feel like you've lost your future, you might sleep alot, you want to call them and TELL them things, you want to ask them questions, you want to know WHY?? Yup, been through all of that.

 

Anyway, I had to join this forum because I would really like to lend support to others going through this. I know it's tough, and I too use to think it was a bunch of BS that it would actually get better, but seriously, it DOES!

 

DrowsyWithHope

[kerri_nicole]

Dat 1 again! Oh why do I do this to myself I feel awful having broken NC afte 5 days and that was to answer his text which was sent to wind me up, telling me to Grow Up.. I could not help myself I jsut wanted to say everything to him how bad a person he was etc, so here I am again feeling crap because I was doing well and I felt in power again now back to square one.

 

But I will do it again