THE NO CONTACT CHALLENGE, Part 2

[ScorpiGal83]

Hey scorpigal, did you try those excercises, any joy?

 

Heh. I tried doing them and fell asleep halfway thru. No worries, I'm cured of my urge to call him anyhow thanks again Toodle

[intolerable]

I can't even remember what day it is anymore. It's been more than 4 months.

 

My ex PM-ed me again the other day, asking if I was finish with some schoolwork. I didn't reply, my friends stopped me by pulling the plug of my computer. I love them.

 

I really don't understand why he's trying to contact me all of a sudden. Maybe he wants to be friends, or maybe he just wants attention. I don't know. What I do know is that him contacting me is not good for me.

[hesnotworthit]

DAY 11

meh. today kinda blowed. i kept torchering myself by replying last night, by how heart splitting i felt when i saw him drive past me...

its anoying, cuz i was so happy this last week, everyday i was forgeting him less and feeling more happier...then i just had to run into him, and he just had to go and make me feel like someone was stabbing me in the heart.

i almost broke NC, to tell him i saw him drive past me...thank god i was driving too at the time, so my hands were full...and by the time i got home, i realised how stupid it would be to brake NC just because i saw him...it wouldnt make me feel any better then i was feeling after i saw him, it would only make me feel worse.

so instead i just obbsessed over him all night, and spent today kinda miserable....

i hadnt seen him in 6 weeks before last night...

oh and he was wearing the stupid cap i gave him for christmas...how gay, i hid the jewellery he gave me the moment we broke up, its too painful for me to see...

im clearly not over him yet

 

on a happier note, i think feelings are kinda surfacing for a guy i used to like before i dated my ex....hes so cute, but i know im clearly not ready for a relationship right now, and i dont think he is either...still its nice to feel feelings for someone other then my gay ex.

[pace of ace]

Kudos on the playful use of the word gay there! LOL!!!

[lauramed]

The ex just won't allow me to stick with no contact. Avoid him when he calls my cell phone but I can't when he calls work...can't keep the phone ringing. Then acts all concerned when I don't call him back. Arrrrrggghhh!!!!

 

These exes and the games they play.

[tujna]

Day 11

 

Still asking myself the question how come love does not always win... I know he still loves me but I need to give him time. I don't understand how someone can put everything we had during these 7 years behind his back. I just don't get it.

 

I started feeling very panicky about NC. I do feel like after some time there will not be reason for me to contact him and he won't have reason to contact me either. We both might just move on and this scares me so much. Still unable to let go, still unable to focus on myself, still thinking about him day and night and it will be a while before I do that because I have finals coming and I won't be able to spend any time with friends... Sigh... I just love him no matter what happened between us but maybe because of this love I just have to let him go and let him experience everything he thinks he missed because of me. I know he won't find any better than what we had... Sigh..

[Jabbe]

Numb for her. Happy for me!

[LemonCheesecak]

Day 7

 

Can't complain. Wish I could readjust my sleeping pattern though, its doing a number on me

[4dogs]

day 1

 

I woke up feeling like * * * * , missing her so bad. I still think she is going to call very soon as she did not respect my wishes not to contact me last time anyway. I give it till about sunday!

 

When she calls, I wont pick up. I will try my BEST not to.

 

But how is flat out ignoring her the best way to do this? Wont she get angry?:sad:

[FriendnorFoe]

I have accepted its over, I keep telling myself many times during the day "its over, accept it", so far it has been much more helpful and reliveing than what I was telling myself before and that was "just let go", telling myself this gave me false hopes of reconciliation even if I wouldnt address it, 3 more days till day 30 and I have no doubt in my mind now that I will make that goal and be stronger than I was. I find it comfortiong to think about when I will be moving to another state in the fall to get my bachlors, I will be shedding my skin, my old life and everything attached to it, it will be a while before this but I am finally looking forward to a future for myself

[journeynow]

Friendnorfoe,

 

Excellent. Will you do something to celebrate your accomplishment on Day 30? Treat yourself to something nice!

[createhappiness]

Day 23

 

I'm actually been feeling really confused recently, because I've been trying to quit smoking (4 days NC on that!) and I'm not sure if it's post-break up nerves or just the nicotine w/d making me want to JUMP OUT OF MY SKIN!

 

Overall, I think I'm heading in the right direction. Eating better, taking care of myself, keeping busy, although I still have my moments - they just don't pull me down as far as they used to.

[ToodlePip]

@ToodlePip: exercises? That help? can you point me in their direction? (Haven't read the whole thread yet, but I'll look.)

 

Couple here:

 

 

 

 

 

I use the fire one when my ex is stuck in my head - i "take a picture" of what I'm thinking about and burn it. It invariably lets my mind move on to other things (or fall asleep when in bed)

[journeynow]

Thank you ToodlePip! These are great, and very useful. Esp. for sleep.

[Ixtapa]

Nothing to report. Thinking of him...

[ToodlePip]

end of the day X. Lost track a bit. Feel a second wind coming over me and have started making personal plans and goals. Still think about her all the time.

[Cat76]

After reaching day 5 today, I succumbed and forwarded a funny email earlier this evening. Haven't had a response. I've had a bad bad bad day and I just want to curl up into a little ball and cry

 

Suppose it's back to day 1 tomorrow

[FriendnorFoe]

Friendnorfoe,

 

Excellent. Will you do something to celebrate your accomplishment on Day 30? Treat yourself to something nice!

 

hmm, didnt think about it, I dont drink, dont smoke anymore either, maybe ill buy myself a iced coffee and some new underwear...hahaha, actually on day 30 I will be in another state (hope my ex dosent come on this website, no way to be sure, but Ill give you a hint it rhymes with Mode Smilin' and is the smallest state in the USA) having an interview at the school I wanna go to, what better way to celebrate than writing the introduction to the new book I will be living.

[cl76]

After reaching day 5 today, I succumbed and forwarded a funny email earlier this evening. Haven't had a response. I've had a bad bad bad day and I just want to curl up into a little ball and cry

 

Suppose it's back to day 1 tomorrow

 

This is why you DO NOT BREAK NO CONTACT (unless they contact you first). It only makes the pain worse waiting for a reply. I'm pretty sure you're twisted in agony inside right now... Learn from this mistake, keep your sanity, stay strong.

[cl76]

hmm, didnt think about it, I dont drink, dont smoke anymore either, maybe ill buy myself a iced coffee and some new underwear...hahaha, actually on day 30 I will be in another state (hope my ex dosent come on this website, no way to be sure, but Ill give you a hint it rhymes with Mode Smilin' and is the smallest state in the USA) having an interview at the school I wanna go to, what better way to celebrate than writing the introduction to the new book I will be living.

 

Man that is great - you are improving yourself.

 

Six weeks after breaking up with my gf I have planned a holiday to a coastal resort to celebrate all the blood, sweat and tears I have put into reinvigorating my life and becoming a new man. This is my reward.

 

Remember, NC is about you! Enjoy life again without your ex. It is actually possible.

[ScorpiGal83]

After reaching day 5 today, I succumbed and forwarded a funny email earlier this evening. Haven't had a response. I've had a bad bad bad day and I just want to curl up into a little ball and cry

 

Suppose it's back to day 1 tomorrow

 

Don't worry about this minor setback - at least u knw how it feels when u break NC so you'll definitely think twice the next time you get the urge.. and the urge won't be as strong

 

My ex's sister just gave birth and I didn't even think about contacting him and congratulating him on becoming a first-time uncle... of course I congratulated his sister who's still my friend on Facebook (I blocked the ex).

 

It does get easier with time... you need to make it into more of a habit and focus on the positive aspects of NC even if YOU aren't feeling them yet

 

Good luck!

[ScorpiGal83]

Day 16

 

Had a dream about the ex. GREAT. The dream was, he showed up and wanted to get back together (cliched, anyone??). In the dream he said he still loved me, yada, yada...

 

Then a funny thing happened in the dream. It turned into like a scene from a rom-com and instead of me and my ex, it was Anne Hathaway and Patrick Dempsey (WTH??) I think because I was writing a movie review for "Passengers" which is just being released here (and it's a crap movie, but Anne Hathaway is in it) and also a friend of mine had been talking about Patrick Dempsey yesterday so they somehow made it into my dream...

 

....aaanyway, Anne ('me') decided NOT to take Patrick ('my ex') back and threw the ring back at him (don't know why there was a ring, there wasn't a marriage proposal in the dream i think but it's a typical rom-com type of scene i guess), and shoved all the gifts he brought for her back at him, told him it was OVER and stormed off.

 

Woke up feeling a tad confused but also like ugh, why did I have to dream about him? Ohh well, ho-hum, I don't really care.

 

WEIRD man. But i do tend to have weird dreams. AND i can usually remember my dreams very vividly too which is something I love. Once I dreamt Marilyn Manson was saving the world (this was 12 years ago and I still remember it!!)

 

Haha. Onwards!

[hesnotworthit]

DAY 12

today was better. constinally txting my friend whos just entering a break up, keep giving her advice and my experiences, kinda hurts a bit to be reminded of it all...but still feels good to use my knowledge for the greater good of setting her on the right path

going away for next couple of days, so should be nice to get out of my small, clostrifophic town where i constinatly get paranoier im going to run into him...

kinda happy today...not so gloomy, and obbsessive about him

im beginning to feel the need of not wanting to ever see him again, or contact for that matter...which is good...i realize how it would only hurt and set me back futher...

he sucks

[tiggboriqua]

Day 8

 

A day of Doubth , and curiosity , I was about to answer her call but I held to everything I had I have to remain strong If I take the bait she will have once again control over me . God Help me

[FriendnorFoe]

"If I ever lose your faith in you" by sting, great song, came on when I was on my way home from a friend's house, Weird, never thought of it this way but, the you became me, if I ever lose my faith in myself, dont know if he was actually referring to himself or another but thats the beauty of good lyrics, they can be interpreted diffrently than the artist's orignal thoughts in the writing of them. tomorrow will be good, seeing an old friend of mine play at his recital up at umass.