OMG,yes i know how u feel...but im only 14 n i lost my father when i was 8...its soo hard n i miss him so much i was wit my dad when he died too...my father was my hero...i loved him soo much n now tat hes gone i dont know wat to do sometimes i wanna kill myself my life isnt da same witout him i just keep seein his face n hearin him when i close my eyes sometimes ill lay in bed n cry cuz i want him back soooooo bad........but life will get betta n ur father would want u to be happy n move on but i know its hard as well