vantagelight Posted December 14, 2019 Share Posted December 14, 2019 Hi All, Long story. My GF of 3 years decided to break up with about 2 months ago, instead of working out our differences. We live together she has found a new place and has the keys since nov 15, but wont move out. She has started to see another man. However she is still being warm to me, I know she is very confused, but it is not fair to me. I want to draw a line in the sand. Move out and date other people as is her wish. Or work things out with me and stay. You dont get the best of both worĺds. It is hard to have no contact as we live together. I want to convey this message without conflict. Any suggestions? Link to comment
SarahLancaster Posted December 14, 2019 Share Posted December 14, 2019 If she has keys to her new place, have you asked her when she plans on moving in to the new place? Link to comment
vantagelight Posted December 14, 2019 Author Share Posted December 14, 2019 We have first it was last weekend. Then it was slowly move out this week and start staying at her place this weekend. However nothing is packed as of today. Link to comment
SarahLancaster Posted December 14, 2019 Share Posted December 14, 2019 Why not get some boxes and pack her stuff up? Tell her you have a roommate moving in. By the way, was she paying rent? Is her name on the lease? Link to comment
vantagelight Posted December 14, 2019 Author Share Posted December 14, 2019 I could start packing her things. Her name is on the lease till Jan 1st. She has not paid the rent in 3 months. However i would prefer to be honest in regards to the reason why. Link to comment
goddess Posted December 14, 2019 Share Posted December 14, 2019 Listen, dude, don't let her disrespect you that way. She is being very thoughtless and rude. Seeing another guy while still living there? Now I've heard everything. I am not understanding why she she either (1) doesn't get the h*ll out of the place or (2) have had the courtesy to start seeing someone after she moved out. But that's another issue. I would tell her, point blank, that you want her out ASAP and, if you're up to it, help pack her things. Give her a time limit and tell her, like Sarah said, that you have a roommate coming in. I managed to move out of a nearly 4,000 square foot house in 11 days, so I know it can be done. Be polite but firm. Don't be her doormat. Muster up some courage and tell her to move out. Plain and simple. Link to comment
Rose Mosse Posted December 14, 2019 Share Posted December 14, 2019 I want to convey this message without conflict. Then just convey the message without conflict. You are too worried about how she'll react. I think you're still very much in love with her and aren't seeing straight. Speak simply and slowly for her if there's a chance of miscommunication. This is up to you. Does she have a history of overreacting, violence or vandalism? Link to comment
RayRay63 Posted December 15, 2019 Share Posted December 15, 2019 If the lease runs out on 1 January, does that mean it runs out for you too? If so don't re-sign, and find a place of your own. In order to heal and move on, it is a good idea to change shared geography anyway. Link to comment
vantagelight Posted December 15, 2019 Author Share Posted December 15, 2019 No i am resigning under my own name for the lease. I agree i will be firm and polite and offer solutions to get her the heck out of here. Link to comment
melancholy123 Posted December 15, 2019 Share Posted December 15, 2019 You must like being a doormat as she is certainly walking all over you. I'd be packing up her stuff in order to get her out faster. She has no respect for you and you need to put some starch in your backbone and tell her she has to leave. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted December 15, 2019 Share Posted December 15, 2019 She is dating another guy and hasn't paid rent in three months. The is nuts. It is time for her to go. You have allowed her to walk all over you long enough., Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted December 15, 2019 Share Posted December 15, 2019 Sorry to hear this. Is this the love-nest with the new guy? Where does she pay rent? This place or the new (his/their) place? Does she co-own or co-lease the place? If she only signed for something new less than 30 days ago you can't just kick her out. You'll have to be patient and review the paperwork legalities and give her notice if you are within your rights to do so. If you can't afford the place on your own start looking for roommates or a new place.We live together she has found a new place and has the keys since nov 15, but wont move out.She has started to see another man. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted December 15, 2019 Share Posted December 15, 2019 She's getting free rent and free utilities at your place? Please don't tell us she's also on your phone plan AND you buy all the food! What is her reason for refusing to move out? Link to comment
ThatwasThen Posted December 15, 2019 Share Posted December 15, 2019 Any suggestions? Bring home a one nighter and bang loudly so your "ex" hears? Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted December 15, 2019 Share Posted December 15, 2019 If she's still on the lease you have to wait until you resign. You can't kick someone out of their own place. It doesn't matter if she has keys to 10 different other places. What matters is the law and if she's on the lease you need to get her off and give her 30 days notice After that. Just because she has a new bf you can't break the law. Research the tenant/landlord laws in your area and speak to your landlord about getting her off the lease. Look, relax, breathe... she has a new bf and a new place. So she won't be there much longer.No i am resigning under my own name for the lease. Link to comment
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