Goodbye, ENAers

[jengh]

move out? She cant tell you what to do when you arent in her house

 

yes, I agree. You're 19. You're at that age where you need to find yourself. I suggest getting a job (you could get a job doing a number of things, working in a supermarket bagging, cashier, retail, food service), saving up some money and finding yourself an apartment.

[samiami]

move out? She cant tell you what to do when you arent in her house

 

Yeah, do that after you get your job.

[EvaGina]

Yeah, do that after you get your job.

 

lol

yeah, you cant do with without income

[caro33]

19 was a bad age for me too, but if you commit to the sorts of things people have mentioned here you can claw your way out of the hopeless feeling. It really does improve.

 

Is there a reason you can't get any job at all?

 

If you had a job, would you move out?

 

If you imagine yourself being able to work toward having your own money to buy the lifestyle you want, do you still want to end your life?

[fnlyfrei]

Quote from the movie.."The Pursuit of Happyness"

 

(Will Smith, to his son, whom he just finished telling he would never be a very good basketball player...because HE wasn't...he watches his son's face fall, and the little boy stops trying to shoot the basketball...realizing his mistake...Will tells him this...)

 

"Don't let anyone tell you you can't do something, not even me"...You got a dream, you gotta protect it. People can't do something themselves, they wanna tell you that you can't do it. You want something? Go get it. Period."

 

 

Go get it guitar boy !

[CynicalGuitarist]

lol

yeah, you cant do with without income

 

If only someplace was hiring. I've tried almost everyplace in town and none are willing to hire me. Not even Wal-Mart or Target. I'd love to move out, but for now, that's just a pipe dream.

[samiami]

If only someplace was hiring. I've tried almost everyplace in town and none are willing to hire me. Not even Wal-Mart or Target. I'd love to move out, but for now, that's just a pipe dream.

 

Well, just keep trying. You said you've tried ALMOST everyplace in town. Now try the rest. Don't consider anything to be beneath you. When you've tried everyplace, start over again. Just because they aren't hiring this month doesn't mean that they won't be next month.

[keefy1972]

CG I noticed in one of your posts here on this thread that you mentioned one of your problems is that you can't find anyone to play music with. If you like the guitar, take note of guys like Joe Satriani and Johnny Lang. Those guys worked hard at that craft consistently and can make absolutely fantastic music playing all by themselves.

 

I'm glad to see that, by the time I'd gotten to this point in the thread, that maybe you are reconsidering. I could come on here and tell you the typical, "don't do it don't do it" stuff but I see you don't want to hear that. I don't blame you. What we can offer you is an ear and some sound caring advice. Sometimes, all a person really needs is to be heard. To get things off their chest and gain some outside perspective.

 

The good news is that this gift of life IS yours. You can do with it as you wish. If you want to end it, then end it, but please consider how that may affect others in your life. Are you willing to sentence loved ones to a lifetime of anguish for your own weakness? Or are you willing to overcome your obstacles, design a life that makes you happy, and all of the loved ones proud? Either way, it is up to you, and it can be done.

[beh700]

yeah try volunteering at a place until the summer time. volunteer work is great to start a resume. any place that intests you that you could spend a few hours a week at will be a sure way to get hired elsewhere in a few months. good luck!

[samiami]

yeah try volunteering at a place until the summer time. volunteer work is great to start a resume. any place that intests you that you could spend a few hours a week at will be a sure way to get hired elsewhere in a few months. good luck!

 

Oh, good idea!

[Daddy Bear]

CG, didn't you post a link to some of your music once? Was that you?

[CynicalGuitarist]

CG, didn't you post a link to some of your music once? Was that you?

I think I did...

[andrewman]

It'd be really helpful, I think, if you can look for jobs in a music related field, even if it's just a record store somewhere or a place that sells guitars, etc. Use your guitar skills to get the job! What better salesman for guitars than someone who can really show what they can do!

 

And remember, when you're going in for that interview that you are the stuff (can't curse on this forum, but you know what I wanted to say) You would be the best person for the job, because it's something that you feel passionate about.

 

When it comes to your life experiences, I know that they're really hard right now and it totally sucks, but just think of the stories you have and what advice and life experiences you can now share with others who are trying to go through the same thing!

 

I'm actually jealous of you, I don't have any interesting stories in my life because I squandered it and now I'm trying my darndest to get out there and live. Please, do the same.

 

Remember we're all here to help and if you want any help with either how to handle interviews to how to find an apartment to whatever, I'm sure there are people here with expertise in whatever you need advice with. This is an amazing community that you're a part of, let us be your base in this hard time. And probably some day you'll be one of ours.

 

I did a little quick web searching and found there's a Guitar Center in your area:

link removed

On the left, there's a link to Employment Opportunities, you'll need to fill out some type of questionnaire (I didn't do it because I didn't know any sacramento Zip codes) But that'd be a good start. There's also Fifth String Music and Skip's Music there as well. (I'm sure you probably know about all these but I'm just trying to be helpful)

 

Let me know how it goes.

[Daddy Bear]

Yeah, I remember your music. I thought it was tasty buds! How you gonna give that up?

 

Flash forward a couple of years... you could be on your way to being the next Robert Fripp, with proper equipment and an admiring girlfriend, living on your own with nobody to tell you what to do. Or you could be a rotten corpse (or pile of ashes, whatever). Which sounds better? Do I even have to ask?

 

You're a highly intelligent, temperamental, perfectionistic artist. Is that so hard to deal with? And geez, I hate to play this card, but what would your dad want for you?

 

You can't expect to capture all your dreams by 19. That fire in your soul should be put to better use than to immolate yourself. You have potential, dude.

 

Are you getting any of this?

[CrystalDawn]

I'm sure there's a way to get into a music caeere others here can help you out better than I could. Don't be afraid to check in with music stores close to where you live to see if there hireing. Take care and good luck.

[Scout]

Well, you can't really go anywhere in the music industry without at least a half-stack. She opposes me having anything else besides my current guitar and a 100watt amp; nevermind getting a small drumset and bass + small amp for recording. My output of my soundcard is broken so I can't really make any recordings on the computer anymore. I'm going nowhere fast. That's only the tip of the iceburg though.

 

Hi, CG...my boyfriend is a musician, and so I just asked him some questions about your situation. Here were a few suggestions he thought might or might not be of help to you:

 

Inquire with local music stores about layaway options for music gear. (I realize you don't have a job right now, but once you do, this is an option.) You can put as much money into it as you want; eventually you'll be able purchase the piece of equipment you have your eye on.

 

You could also put a sound card on layaway.

 

Also, he recommended a specific amp to shoot for to use in recording (though not nearly the sound loudness you're going for to gig out), there's also an amp called the Epiphone Valve Junior (something like that) that is a very good sounding, but low cost tube amp.

 

None of these are instant solutions, but food for thought once you get some bucks together. Music obviously means a lot to you, and I think because your current equipment isn't everything you need right now, you're feeling a real lack. It's hard for some people to understand, but to musicians, playing music is like eating to the rest of us!

 

My boyfriend also told me to tell you not to give up. Even if you never become famous, you'll certainly meet other music kindred spirits to form a good band with eventually, and it is incredibly rewarding. Because you are feeding your creative outlet. And hey, you may actually become famous, you never know! (Don't forget your eNotalone friends when you do, ok?

[mgirl]

CynicalGuitarist,

 

My sister committed suicide and i know if she were alive today, she wouldn't have made the decision she made one year ago.

[Drunk]

hey, you said you posted a link with your music before...I was wondering if you could post it again, I'd love to hear it!!!

[Ericson]

What problems do you think taking your life will solve. None. You'll be forgotten, just a memory, your family will weep, others will frown. But life will go on. You have to understand you were given a chance at life. A chance that doesn't come around every once in a while. Make the most of your life. Don't become mere dust in the grains of sand. Think about it, think about your options, get yourself some help.

[isisastaria]

My dad died when I was 15 and I felt the same way. I think you need to stop and look at the whole picture right now. Grief is like a toothache (that you never get filled). It hurts like hell then you kind of get used to it. You will never fully "get over" your dad's death, but you can get better.

 

There are people who overdose on cetain drugs (over the counter) that wake up the next morning thinking that they lived through it and they are fine. Then they think to themselves,"Why did i even think about that? That was so stupid!"

 

What they don't know is that the drug(s) did irrepairable damage to their organs and they will die within 3 days. I know because my mother is in the mental health profession and she has SEEN it happen.

 

suicide isn't your only option. As hard as it seems right now, you need to get through this and accept that maybe one day you can take your experience and help others with what you have learned. People who don't experience this sort of thing aren't as helpful as people who have. What about other kids that will (and are) going through the same thing? You can't try to help them? It will eventually help YOU if you do. I wouldn't isolate and withdraw. You should get out and as painful as it seems...be around people in your situation. Go see a counselor/ therapist.

[Leonhart]

You know, I can really relate to you. I've felt like you, so many times. The only thing keeping me here is that I know dying isn't going to "solve" my problems. If there really is a hereafter, then I'll just end up taking my miserable problems with me there too. So might as well stick around and see how the play unfolds.

 

Maybe (just maybe) there's a plot twist in the second act, where things work out for us both! You never know.

[schizo]

I just have to say...I absolutely HATE it when someone says they're hurting, and someone else starts telling them about how horrible other peoples' lives are, or how much worse off they could be. That DOES NOT matter. What matters is someone is hurting, for whatever reason. No matter how insignificant or small their problems may seem, they're HURTING.

 

Cynical, I know how you're feeling and it is HARD. But if you can survive this, you will feel great, so I hope you can. Take the advice from these people who are really trying to help, and try to realize that the people who are telling you to just get over it and not want to kill yourself anymore don't understand, and that is wonderful for them to have never felt so down.

 

I wish you the best of luck. Feel free to e-mail me any time if you feel like talking stuff out with a stranger.

[Spugly Fuglet]

"I ended up hiding the pain away for the most part because I was tired of my mother babying me and my brother treating me like he was the only one that was hurt."

 

 

CynicalGuitarist can I just say some thing, its this you have a grate gift, that gift is "pain" real pain, not the kind that some say they have in there life but hard core pain, music is your outlet it where you can show that pain in ways that thows around you can not see, can I ask do you right songs, if you dont you should, put into workds your! life, your pain! from he hart, it will shape and hold thows who hear your music, never give up you dream and be true to your felings on this. Some of the gratest music in the world has come from where you are now, that pit of pain. Im not telling not to kill your self, what I asking is for you to try and make grate work. We are all dieing its always been a mater of when, Me I paint thats where my pain gos, After I have done a painting I hate it its never good but others like my work, some say it talks to them, your music will be like that, place your feelings into it and dont fear, all of you all the pain, hurt, fustraion, anger, love, loss, and wonder all of it and never stop just try and get the craft to do it so well that it rocks our world.

 

Do that and you will not have time for death.

[shadow34]

Cynical,

 

I sent you a private message my friend, please read it,

 

I have no judged you in any way, I have just shared an experience with you...

 

Hugs to you.......

[Dougie_D]

Hey..

I'm not really into jazz but I greatly appreciate guitarists who play it. The fact that you are "going down hill in life" makes no sense to me. The fact that you still want to play guitar is a good sign bro.

I'm 26 years old, didn't get my first job until I was 24, never been on a date before, my father says the same things...about things I want are "wasteful" or "toys"...he doesn't care about my passion for anything, unless it's business.

Playing music is a lot harder when you are my age. I don't have the desire anymore. That's because I don't do it for the passion. I wanted to get greedy and make money. That's a hard task...A lot of musicians feel this way. I think I have been brainwashed by the music industry and my parents.

In Jazz, you might have a problem playing with people because they just can't keep up with you. I don't know if you go to college, but you can probably go and find a drummer in their music program.

Honestly, why do you need a half stack? Is it for image? If you are doing recordings...then a combo amp would do just fine. Or jazz clubs. Most Jazz clubs are "Quiet"...so the guitarists don't have half-stacks.

About the job thing....trust me....be a cart guy for Wal-mart. Easy as crap and you don't have to deal with people. You get paid a lot more than a grocery store.

Good Luck bro!