would you date someone that is married?

[miticalzz]

would you date someone that is married but says they are filing for a divorce soon?

[ImThatGirl]

Nope. Been there, done that. The guy married another girl he was dating through his divorce. He still calls me to this day.

[freedom]

Sure i would, i highly recommend it!! it is great to have you heart ripped out stamped out split out, dragged through the crap )

It is the greatest thing on earth!

NOT!!!!

if he a filing, the he can wait after he files to see anything will happen.

 

To me, this really is a daft queston.

Sorry for beig rude.

[friscodj]

No way. First of all, it is wrong legally, until the divorce is final, and I believe morally as well.

 

On a deeper level, they're going to be emotional road kill for a while, how bad depends on the circumstances.

 

You're far better off being single or dating someone who is single...or lighting yourself on fire...

[rocio]

No, but I would fantasize about it. That's one of my favorite fantasies: being the sexy mistress.

 

But it's better left as a fantasy.

[New_Horizons]

No. Never. No. Never. No. Never.

[SeaBisquit]

noooo. it will put you thru hell. chances are you will be sitting around forever waiting for him to file.

[rose2summer]

Well if you want to be their nanny and psychologist as they go through a breakup, then so be it.

 

Most people who say they are going to divorce when they find another, rarely do, it's just a ploy to get free and string-free sex.

 

It's not worth dealing with their baggage, let them handle it, it's not your problem.

 

Find somepne who can be both emotionally and pyschologically available to you, not someone who has one foot in, one foot out, and will most likely take the foot that is hanging out and put it back in, and slam the door in your face.

 

Hugs, Rose

[justpaisley]

Nope. Wait till the divorce is final. Ever heard the expression "If they'll do it with you, they'll do it to you?"

[Day_Walker]

No way. First of all, it is wrong legally, until the divorce is final, and I believe morally as well.

 

I cannot say that it is legally wrong, I dont believe there are any adultry statutes on the books and if there are they are few and far between, so I will not say that it is legally wrong. I believe that it is a moral question, although I dont see a difference just because a piece of paper is being signed. If a person is taking active steps to get a divorce then I would say that is enough.

 

I would never date a person that was going through this process, because I dont want to get involved in it. I would say that having sex with them would be another story, but I would not date them.

[rose2summer]

dont believe there are any adultry statutes on the books and if there are they are few and far between

 

I thought in some states, his wife could sue the mistress??

[arwen]

No, I wouldn't. Too many risks to become part of a triangle.

[Aurian]

He had better file first. I understand a separation period leading to the final divorce (this is mandatory in many places), but if he's married and just talking about a divorce? No! If he's living with her? No! If he's spending a lot of time with her? No!

 

I have no interest in being a fling while someone is married.

[Day_Walker]

I thought in some states, his wife could sue the mistress??

 

Yes that is true, but it would be a civil lawsuit probably based on Intentional Infliction of Emotional Distress or Negligence Infliction of Emotional Distress rather than being based on any criminal statute.

[rose2summer]

Yes that is true, but it would be a civil lawsuit probably based on Intentional Infliction of Emotional Distress rather than being based on any criminal statute.

 

Thanks DW for posting that.

 

I think sometimes people get so swept up in the excitement of infidelity or being a mistress, they don't realize the ramifications.

 

Not only is being a mistress morally wrong, it can have financial downfalls.

[shikashika]

no way... would not do it

[ImThatGirl]

I think that if someone is considering becoming emotionally involved with a married man and is willing to take those ramifications, then they will also write off the issue of whether it's legal or not.

 

Just don't do it. You deserve better than this!

[Dako]

Under certain circumstances, I certainly would, but not in the situations implied by the above posts.

 

I'm meeting my ex soon to start the filing. I'm pretty much over the split and so is she.

We delayed it so she could deal with a lengthy diagnosis, treatment and recovery from a brain tumor that became a priority for us both. Although legally married today, we consider ourselves divorced and speak in the past tense. It's just a legal formality since when we were married, it wasn't the State that bound us together, but our personal committment.

Just as all marriages differ, so do divorces.

 

Flame on!

[4thelast1]

I met my husband while he was separated from his "wife". He wasnt legally separated but lived in the same home. I thought it was B.S. I told him that if he wanted to date me then I needed proof that he was serious about me. He filed and 1year later was offically divorced. Yes I dated him through out the entire time. It was hard, I dont recommend it and if I were to do it all over again I would wait until the dust settled. Would I go back and do it differently??? I'm not sure, I love him and wouldnt give him up for anything. He had to prove to me he was serious.

[RayKay]

While personally I would not, I can see people doing it in certain situations like if they were legally separated (and had been apart for a time), and actually finalizing the divorce proceedings....maybe. Depending on where you are, the laws and the entanglements it can take some time, even if it is really OVER, to get it all done. Still can be messy and full of pain though...so go forth cautiously.

 

Personally, from having seen it through friends and family's experiences, it is a process I do not want to interfere with, and I have seen many going through the process where reality has not set in until AFTER it is final, and they go through all the emotions all over again with great ramifications to anyone whom may have entered their lives.

 

If it was a particularly nasty divorce, they were still living together or there were doubts it was happening or some fishy stories....no.

[doyathink]

I think it would depend on the person. I'm not in favor of it but things happen, different circumstance!

[DN]

Yes that is true, but it would be a civil lawsuit probably based on Intentional Infliction of Emotional Distress or Negligence Infliction of Emotional Distress rather than being based on any criminal statute.

 

It's called Alienation of Affection and is only a cause for a civil action in a few states of the US.

 

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