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About JandJMom

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  1. I feel like I've been alone for the past 3 years, but I haven't healed at all. I don't know how to heal or what to do because I see my husband all the time, too. I actually feel guilty for not wanting to be with him, or try to work it out. And, multiple people have told me that I'm just holding onto this guy to make myself feel better. And I probably am. And I have been stressing over it, but I can never just relax and enjoy what I have. I don't know how. I'm not even looking for anything serious, I know I don't want anything serious. I'd love to have this guy as like a nice fri
  2. I know that this is not going to end well, but I'm apparently a glutton for punishment. I've posted about this guy before, but didn't tell the whole truth about the situation. But I started talking to a guy at work, he told me from get go that we needed to take it slow, but things were complicated, but that was into me. He's married. Not happily. He sleeps on the floor in his 2 year old's room. His wife is not a citizen, they never got her green card and she can't work, and they can't exactly divorce each other, yet. She has another boyfriend and her plan is to leave and take his ki
  3. Honestly, this is what I'm going for. He told me that he's going to need someone through this, and I feel like he will definitely need a friend to get through that. I just need to learn how to slow it down and just see what happens. I honestly think that this could be an awesome friendship, if I can relax. We talked for 2 hours about making wands and nerd decals and starting an Etsy together. Eventually, I'll be fine. But sometimes it seems that other people can walk away from a relationship or possible relationship so easy, and I feel like I get so upset when I shouldn't.
  4. We did go out and he texted me when he got home that he had a really good time. We played mini golf and played at the arcade. But, I guess, I thought we'd spend the whole time off together, so that was me thinking more into it. I know that this is a temporary feeling for me. Yes, I'm lonely, but I usually have lots of other stuff going on. The pandemic is more than likely just giving me a lot more time to think about all of this. Plus, within my 3 years since my husband and I ended, I've only talked to two guys and that started in February. Usually, I'm running my kids to friends ho
  5. Yes, you're right. But what if I never meet anyone again 😞 and maybe that's irrational, but that's how I feel. I haven't had anyone even look at me in 3 years. The odds are completely against me.
  6. I know. And I know this is my issue. My self confidence and self worth is at an all time low right now. I can feel it. I'm sad, all the time. Second guessing everything that I say to everyone. I'm insecure about every interaction and every decision that I make. I feel like anyone who is even half worth it, I have to cling to because no one else is going to even give me the time. I've been alone for three years and this is the first person that's shown any interest in me. There's a reason for that right? If I don't wait for him, then there is no one. And, also, I think that the
  7. So, I posted last week about me and a guy from work talking. It was so nice at first. He was flirty and cute and he actually liked me. But I can tell, it's fizzling out. And I'm sad. I don't get much attention from men. And it's been 3 years since I've had sex so I was really looking forward to it. I was pretty sure that this wasn't going to be serious. He has a lot of issues, as do I. But I thought it was finally just going to have a casual relationship that I needed, just to feel alive again. Not like the lonely, frumpy mom that I am. I'm sad. Lol. And I just wish that I w
  8. I'm not going to lie, I don't think I'm looking for anything serious with him anyway. He's a really nice guy, and I don't want to be mean, but he's not the type of guy that I can see myself taking home to meet my parents. The more I talk to him, the more I see that he's not the marrying type, not yet anyway. I'm just looking for a little fun, at the moment, so I guess I'm asking, if he still seems like he's interested in a casual relationship still, lol. We took off time next week together and at first he was saying all the things that we were going to do. But the other day, I aske
  9. Honestly, I haven't had sex in 3 years. I wasn't looking for it for a long time, but now I'm ready to have a little fun. So I'm fine. I'm not looking for a serious relationship, at this time. We're both the same age, have a lot of things in common, I like talking to him. Do I think this is some long term thing? No. I think that I'm just ready to get out a little bit. So I think this is fine. Or maybe I'm just desperate for some kind of intimacy and I'm not that pretty, so Im just taking what I can get 😩
  10. At work, I was telling one of my friends that one of the other guys at work was my "type". Lol, he always stopped to talk to me about his kids, he's a really hard worker, he's funny, and he's so cute! Literally, the next day, he found me on Facebook and we've been talking everyday since November. At work, we don't get to talk as much. He works in a different area than me and our schedules are a bit off. We've gone to lunch together a few times, but at the moment he gets off before I'd even be able to take my lunch, so can't even do that now. We haven't gotten to hang out outside of w
  11. Sorry guys it's me again. You can read my old posts to see how much of a mess I am. I don't even mean to get into these situations. It's my friend again. We didn't talk for months, because of something stupid. I didn't block him, but I erased his number and unfriended, just to let myself get over him. But he's back, again, and for a few weeks, I was doing really well staying indifferent. I didn't text him or call him, if he texted, I would answer, but you know, I wasn't like I usually am. I did so good for awhile. And even now, I still have my guard up, but it's getting really har
  12. I'm sorry, this will probably be long. I don't have many people that know the whole story, plus, my life's a mess and I don't like many people knowing it. My husband and I were together 13 years and apparently he was unhappy for most of those years. He did lots of things that were red flags, even in the beginning, but I let it go, he apologized and then we kept it moving. I was honestly happy for the most part. The only thing I ever asked of him was to help out more. We have two kids together, both work full time, plus their activities. Busy a lot of the time, but I just thought norma
  13. I'm sorry guys, but I'm back. I hadn't texted, let's just call him my friend, for a couple of days and then of course, he starts to text me back. I'm just confused. Again, I'm fine with being friends. But I don't know if I know how to be friends, lol, if that makes sense. Most of my friends don't text me every day, even when he's busy he texts me every morning to say good morning and that he's heading in to work and even when I'm busy, he texts me every night to tell me goodnight. He texts me to let me know when he's done with work, then if I answer, he calls me. I dont text or call him
  14. I'm going to file for the divorce myself. I realize that I can't even be free of my husband until I do it. I told my friend that I never filed for it myself because I felt bad for my husband. A part of me feels like he can't even go on by himself and that I still need to take care of him. Justin told me that I had a lot going on and I do. And that I needed to get everything sorted out. Also, I'm going to start going to counseling. Maybe that will help me open up to other people. I love my family. But I just don't feel comfortable opening up to them about my marriage. I just don't.
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