ladies-Is this a turn off?

[byates5637]

This is a question for all the ladies out there.

 

I am a multi-faceted guy with many interests. I like doing "normal" guy stuff like going out to bars with friends, parties, playing pool, etc.

 

But my one true passion in life is the pursuit of knowledge. I love all kinds of science related things. I love discussions about the origins of the universe, the role of God in science, new technology, computers, etc. My ex girlfriend never liked when i tried to talk about this stuff.

 

So ladies, is this a turn off in general if a guy tried to talk to you about something like science or foreign affairs? Do you think it would make me come accross as pretentious? Should i save these conversations for only with my buddies at college?

[jensxcom]

I think it depends on how you go about talking about it. Dont lecture, i also think it depends on the girl and what she likes.

 

For example i went out on a date with this guy to the museum he kept commenting on all the artwork every second, made me sick.

 

You should ask a question to the girl about the subject instead of lecturing.

[smilelikeyoumeanit]

Well, as long as it isn't all you talk about, and you have more light-hearted conversation, there isn't anything wronf with talking about your interests and world issues.

[keenan]

Uh, no. In fact, it's rather a requirement.

 

But it's a great big turn-off that you think that women wouldn't be interested in science or foreign affairs, and that these topics are best reserved for your "college buddies."

[Bethany]

Foreign affairs I'm not too sure of, but I think generally if you want to talk about the universe etc, you should think of a good way doing it. Maybe take her some place romantic on a clear night so you both can stare up at the stars and you could share your knowledge with her. There are ways and means without being boring about it.

[byates5637]

Uh, no. In fact, it's rather a requirement.

 

But it's a great big turn-off that you think that women wouldn't be interested in science or foreign affairs, and that these topics are best reserved for your "college buddies."

 

I'm sorry keenan. Didn't mean to make a generalization about women or anything. I know there are plenty of women interested in this kind of stuff. Just kind of wanted to survey the people here and see how many would like this vs. how many wouldn't.

 

I am a bit confused and lost right now. I have spent the last 6 years of my life in 2 long term relationships with girls that hated when i tried to talk about this stuff. I just don't really know much about casual dating i guess.

[jensxcom]

Like I said it depends on the person...

[Belinda]

It depends on the girl. Personally it would be for me, but thats because I have that same thirst for knowledge. It's just a personal preference.

Some girls like a hot guy who just slaves after them and doesnt talk too much (and some guys do too). Whereas most (IMO) decent girls appreciate a guy who is intellegent.

 

My ex always implied he was intellegent, but quite often it was just that he rambled off a point that he heard in hear say, like it was gospel. So as long as youre not ignorant about your point and are accepting to whatever opinion she has too, you should be fine.

[byates5637]

Belinda- I would actually prefer a girl who has her own opinion on issues. I like open debate. I don't really want a girl who is just going to agree with me. I have a very open mind to things and i love when someone can show me a new perspective.

[yeawutever]

In depends on what way you talk about it and also on the girl. To me, it would depend on what type of science you're referring to, if it's chemistry or physics it's boring, if it's biology or any type of science dealing with discoveries or life forms, dinosaurs, fossils, it's interesting. Now of God, lol, I would need prove in order to actaully say it exist, I'm atheist.

[hosswhispra]

This is a question for all the ladies out there.

 

I am a multi-faceted guy with many interests. I like doing "normal" guy stuff like going out to bars with friends, parties, playing pool, etc.

 

But my one true passion in life is the pursuit of knowledge. I love all kinds of science related things. I love discussions about the origins of the universe, the role of God in science, new technology, computers, etc. My ex girlfriend never liked when i tried to talk about this stuff.

 

So ladies, is this a turn off in general if a guy tried to talk to you about something like science or foreign affairs? Do you think it would make me come accross as pretentious? Should i save these conversations for only with my buddies at college?

 

It's definitely not a turn off for me if a guy talks about science, politics, or technology. In fact, it's a turn on for me, seriously. I am very attracted to smart men. I love it because lively conversations are guaranteed!

[byates5637]

Ailec - I rejected my religion as a kid because of serious doubts i had in my mind. I still am not religious. I just feel that no one really has a better explanation for why we exsist besides the "god" explanation

[Lady Bugg]

I'd only see it as a turn off if you were "preachy" or came accross as a know it all. Also, not asking someone thier opinion on certain topics...whether you agree OR disagree is important as well.....

[yeawutever]

Maybe it's all due to evolution, something like we came from very extremely tiny cells stuck on the ocean and it took some millions of years to develop. As time went by, we started to form from small sized homids (homoerectus) to homosapiens.

[Bethany]

If you're talking about an open debate, then I think that most women like to challenge a man's thinking and learn new things from them. But people are people even if they are women and they will very rarely change their opinion so try to understand the other point of view rather than change it.

[Belinda]

Byates, then you should be fine. Im just giving you a heads up.

Like others said, just make sure you let her get involved in the convo, and give her examples about science things, using something she likes.

Like... God I dont know, explaining capitalism vs communism using her favourite hobby of fashion as the point of example.

 

Lol, I have no idea how you'd pull it off, my example sucked. But yknow what I mean.

[jensxcom]

I think women like talking about these topics these days, I think after sept 11, bush as president and Iraq War its common for people to discuss these things,I think before Bush was president it was less popular.

[byates5637]

Like... God I dont know, explaining capitalism vs communism using her favourite hobby of fashion as the point of example.

 

Brilliant. If only i thought of this before. If there was a way i could of explained all my intellectual interests to my ex-girlfriends in terms of fashion maybe they wouldn't be ex-girlfriends. lol

[CarnelianButterfly]

I like to talk or argue about issues, but thats me. One dinner I had with my friends (who are mostly male) I spent over an hour talking to one of them about wine, while the 6 guys next to us raged and argued about abortion. I was the only girl there, but I didn't want to argue about abortion, I wanted to relax and talk about wine. So it not only depends on the girl, but it can also depends on her mood.

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

If you talked about such things to me, I'd be on the floor in a melted heap. (Thats a GOOD thing).

[keenan]

If you talked about such things to me, I'd be on the floor in a melted heap. (Thats a GOOD thing).

 

 

And if you DIDN'T talk about such things to me, I'd be on the floor too...but asleep from boredom.

 

No hard feelings about my earlier post, byates. I've been pretty surprised by the responses here, so who knows what kind of reaction you get in the field. Honestly, I don't care anything about a guy having a formal education, but I care everything about a guy being smart & curious & in love with ideas & the world at large. If you tried to tie such things to shopping to pique my interest, I'd deck you.

 

Good luck, man.

[shyanne]

not at all... i think it would be very interesting. its good to talk about different things

[Dutchy]

Well, I don't find it a turnoff. It definitely depends on the girl. AND it's also important how you say it. Generally I would find those conversations interesting, but there has te be room for other subjects.

[byates5637]

If you tried to tie such things to shopping to pique my interest, I'd deck you.

 

Good luck, man.

 

keenan, i can only wish that there girls around my area who think like you. I know there may be some, but they are like a needle in a haystack. I'm pretty drunk right now, and after talking to severaL girls at the bar i feel like i may never meet anyone on my level. It is kind of depressing...

[keenan]

keenan, i can only wish that there girls around my area who think like you. I know there may be some, but they are like a needle in a haystack. I'm pretty drunk right now, and after talking to severaL girls at the bar i feel like i may never meet anyone on my level. It is kind of depressing...

 

You'll find somebody smart and interesting, I promise. As you get a little older and out of college, you'll find that people disperse a bit, then (re)congregate in groups of like-minded others. You'll meet lots of cool girls at work, or in graduate school, or in hobbyist groups. Bars with roving packs of women (or men!) are a challenge.

 

Keep your mind open, though. Sometimes it's easy to get preoccupied with one's own particular brand of 'brilliance' (lol) and overlook those who are equally stellar in other domains. If you're looking to unlock the secrets of the universe with a girl in a bar, she may be wishing you'd leave the god thing alone and recite some Pablo Neruda...or talk about your desire to sail around the world, or build a kayak with your own hands, or buy green tags and start using biodiesel, or assist with bringing sustainable technological developments to third-world countries. There are lots of pretty fantastic people out there who don't necessarily wear their brain on their sleeve...they roll it out more slowly to people they trust.