I dont know where i am with my crush

[Mlap]

So i have been crushing on this girl for 3 years now. We have eachother on snap, but we rarely snapped aside from the streaks. A year ago i started texting her more often and we seemed to hit it off, although i almost always started the conversation.

6 months ago we met at a party and i walked up to her and we talked for the first time in person. We even hugged. She didnt really stay too long and went back to her friends after.

She went to work abroad for 6 months shortly after and has been back from her work for a month now. I havent seen her and we havent texted since she is back. 

I dont know where i am, im pretty certain she used to like me 4 years ago, now i dont know if she still likes me now and what i should do next , so we get into contact more.

Thanks for your help

[Batya33]

Ask her out on a date you plan in advance if you two are both single. Then you will know if she’s interested in dating you. 

[Cherylyn]

You can always contact her but be prepared for any scenario whether acceptance or rejection so you're not shocked nor surprised.  Keep an open mind for the least amount of disappointment if the outcome is not in your favor.  😐  Hope it works out though! 🙂

[Coily]

Now is the time to strike! Seriously, you two have been talking for 4 years and if you don't act soon someone else may sweep her off her feet. Best part, you will have an answer!

[Wiseman2]

1 hour ago, Mlap said:

. I havent seen her and we havent texted since she is back.  , so we get into contact more.

Reconnect on social media catch up and ask her out.

[Mlap]

1 minute ago, Wiseman2 said:

Reconnect on social media catch up and ask her out.

I more or less did it every month but, stopped a month ago, because i felt like it could be boring for her

[MissCanuck]

Have you actually asked her out? 

[boltnrun]

1 hour ago, Mlap said:

I more or less did it every month but, stopped a month ago, because i felt like it could be boring for her

So you did ask her out? What was her response?

[Mlap]

18 minutes ago, boltnrun said:

So you did ask her out? What was her response?

No sorry, 😄I didnt ask her out. I caught up with her over social media

[Batya33]

9 minutes ago, Mlap said:

No sorry, 😄I didnt ask her out. I caught up with her over social media

Would you like to date her ? If so ask her out before someone else does. 

[Mlap]

6 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

Would you like to date her ? If so ask her out before someone else does. 

Of course i would like to date her, but its easier said than done😅

[boltnrun]

Just now, Mlap said:

Of course i would like to date her, but its easier said than done😅

What do you find so difficult about saying "Would you like to go out with me sometime? There's a great coffee shop/cafe I'd love to take you to."

Yeah, there's fear of rejection blah blah blah, but if you don't ask I can guarantee she'll never go out with you. So what is it you want? To protect yourself from POSSIBLE rejection or the chance to go on a date with someone you like?

[SooSad33]

Yup, you don't know until you go there.

You say you talk over social media?  Good start.  And you also met up once- but basically, that's it!

As mentioned, bring up the idea of meeting up for drinks together, see if she says yes.  That is where you begin 😉 .  Continue to try & get to know her IF she allows it.  ( by sounds of it, you still don't know a whole lot abt her).

You sound pretty respectful and not in her face with expectations etc, lol.  Good on you.  Be yourself and see how it goes.... you will know soon enough.

 

[Mlap]

4 hours ago, SooSad33 said:

Yup, you don't know until you go there.

You say you talk over social media?  Good start.  And you also met up once- but basically, that's it!

As mentioned, bring up the idea of meeting up for drinks together, see if she says yes.  That is where you begin 😉 .  Continue to try & get to know her IF she allows it.  ( by sounds of it, you still don't know a whole lot abt her).

You sound pretty respectful and not in her face with expectations etc, lol.  Good on you.  Be yourself and see how it goes.... you will know soon enough.

I actually know her a bit, she comes from a small village where i have a few relatives, so i know her parents and we had communion together when we were like 10 years old.

I guess i will have to ask her out, but i think shes on vacation at the moment. Do you guys think i should wait until she gets back from vacation. And over phone or in person? It might take a few weeks before i can see her in person

[Batya33]

4 minutes ago, Mlap said:

I actually know her a bit, she comes from a small village where i have a few relatives, so i know her parents and we had communion together when we were like 10 years old.

I guess i will have to ask her out, but i think shes on vacation at the moment. Do you guys think i should wait until she gets back from vacation. And over phone or in person? It might take a few weeks before i can see her in person

Phone is fine and you can text her maybe while she's on vacation and make a plan in advance.

[Mlap]

16 hours ago, Batya33 said:

Phone is fine and you can text her maybe while she's on vacation and make a plan in advance.

So do you think i should just text her, "hey, i think you are really interesting, would you like to go for a coffee sometime?" It feels kinda out of nowhere

[MrMan1983]

15 minutes ago, Mlap said:

So do you think i should just text her, "hey, i think you are really interesting, would you like to go for a coffee sometime?" It feels kinda out of nowhere

Hey <insert name>, hope you're having a great holiday and enjoying the <maybe insert something relevant/interesting to wherever she is>. Would be great to do something when you're back, fancy going for a coffee or drink sometime?'.

Worst that can happen is she says no, then at least you tried either way. On the flipside she may say yes, in which case you confidently suggest/set a definite date after.

[MrMan1983]

17 minutes ago, Mlap said:

It feels kinda out of nowhere

Doesn't really matter, she may be pleasantly surprised by the confidence if you've both been beating round the bush for ages with all the messaging.

[Batya33]

55 minutes ago, Mlap said:

So do you think i should just text her, "hey, i think you are really interesting, would you like to go for a coffee sometime?" It feels kinda out of nowhere

No.  I'd text "I'd love to call you and make a plan to meet in person.  When is a good time to call you?"  If the call goes well ask if she'd like to meet for a  daytime walk in a nearby park or trail and grab lunch or ice cream after. Or invite her to see a museum exhibit.

[Mlap]

Okay i texted her "would you like to meet for a coffee sometime"

With a little bit of help from a stranger😄

[NighttimeNightmare]

If you think she thinks you’re boring, what do you plan to talk about it she says yes? 

[Mlap]

7 hours ago, NighttimeNightmare said:

If you think she thinks you’re boring, what do you plan to talk about it she says yes? 

We can talk about her work abroad, what she plans on doing in the future, favorite movies, series and so on.

Its not really that she thinks im a boring person, more that im boring her with my texts, but that is also only a feeling i have

[Mlap]

Okay, so a little update, she has responded after 2 days. 

She told me that she forgot to answer me and that she will be in my city more often, because her new work is here

[Wiseman2]

18 minutes ago, Mlap said:

 that she will be in my city more often, because her new work is here

Great, stay in touch and talk about when getting together would be mutually convenient.

[Mlap]

10 hours ago, Mlap said:

Okay, so a little update, she has responded after 2 days. 

She told me that she forgot to answer me and that she will be in my city more often, because her new work is here

Would you guys say, that her response is a good sign?