Life in the Driver’s Seat (extended)

[Seraphim]

1 minute ago, boltnrun said:

They're taking care of the vulnerable population in my city in September.  Then the rest of us.  We are fortunate to have our own health department so they can distribute the shots much more easily.

It may seem strange but here in the US there isn't a national roll out, per se.  Each state and county is doing things their own way.  I feel it's less efficient but with all the people running around screaming about FREEDOM, there's no way the federal government can set up a nationwide distribution plan.

But, the vaccine is readily available to anyone who wants it.

I'm so glad your son is fully vaccinated!  That must be such a relief for you and his dad.

Here the vaccines are bought at the national level and then distributed to the provinces and then each province does their own roll out. Mind you even my province now and the federal government are making it mandatory for some people to have the vaccine either get the vaccine or be out of a job. And a provincial member of parliament lost their job yesterday for refusing the vaccine. 

[Seraphim]

Yes, we are very glad he is fully vaccinated now. He feels like crap but had a Tylenol and went to bed . 

[Seraphim]

[luminousone]

On 8/18/2021 at 2:09 PM, Seraphim said:

I thought my dad passing away would bring peace to my life but it’s exactly the opposite. It has brought whole new levels of grief on a whole different plane. It will takes years to muddle through. 
 

How does it feel to be the child of an awful person ? A person who did evil purposely and with malice? It is so painful. How do you reconcile that person is also the bearer of your genetics and the person who raised you? I don’t know how to do that ? How do you consider too that they were not all bad or evil and that they themselves suffered horribly? 
 

I have no compatriot in this, save my brother and he doesn’t want to discuss it or deal with it . My mom doesn’t understand as her parents were not horrible people. She was free to love them it’s perfectly good people. 
 

And my big is question of all…. how do you reconcile that you love an awful person? 

Yes, my best friend had to go through this with her dad. Her brothers never ever forgave their dad and would never speak to him in his last years. My friend made as much peace as she could, and in his last months she was a good daughter to him. Just like you have been to your dad.

My ex was a terrible husband, and is quite self centered. But there is one thing that I loved, that he tried to teach my sons when they were young - everyone has goodness in them. But a ometimes it is obscured by darkness. He never wanted my sons to describe someone as a “bad guy”. He always called them “good guys with bad behavior”.

Sometimes that behavior is so deep and so damaging oneself and to others, and of course you would abhor that. But you can still love the goodness that was there. 

[luminousone]

On 8/20/2021 at 6:13 PM, Seraphim said:

Here vulnerable population means those on chemo or immune compromised. It is not even seniors , yet. 

I’m in that cancer treatment category but I spoke with a nurse today and I might need to wait until the end of October because then it will have been 8 months since my second shot. But she told me to discuss with my doctor.

[Seraphim]

9 hours ago, luminousone said:

Yes, my best friend had to go through this with her dad. Her brothers never ever forgave their dad and would never speak to him in his last years. My friend made as much peace as she could, and in his last months she was a good daughter to him. Just like you have been to your dad.

My ex was a terrible husband, and is quite self centered. But there is one thing that I loved, that he tried to teach my sons when they were young - everyone has goodness in them. But a ometimes it is obscured by darkness. He never wanted my sons to describe someone as a “bad guy”. He always called them “good guys with bad behavior”.

Sometimes that behavior is so deep and so damaging oneself and to others, and of course you would abhor that. But you can still love the goodness that was there. 

I don’t remember a lot of good I guess. And then while cleaning things out for the move I found a short note from him when my parents broke up for the last time in 1990. And in it he said he loved me more than anything but he was messed up and might never have his head together. It broke my heart and I was crying again. I also found a letter from my mom from when he kidnapped us in 1980 in which she said she missed me more than life it’s self and told me to eat and sleep properly and my brother and I needed to cling together because we were all that was left our little family without her and she had sent us $2.00 each because I wanted a book and my brother wanted something and my dad wouldn’t buy it. 
 

In talking to my husband yesterday he said words are great but do the actions match ? No. 

[Seraphim]

9 hours ago, luminousone said:

I’m in that cancer treatment category but I spoke with a nurse today and I might need to wait until the end of October because then it will have been 8 months since my second shot. But she told me to discuss with my doctor.

Yes , they are saying 8 months from your last one. 

[Seraphim]

Difficult day being a parent can I sit here and cry? 

[boltnrun]

1 hour ago, Seraphim said:

Difficult day being a parent can I sit here and cry? 

Of course, if you need to.  It's fine to let your emotions out when you feel overwhelmed or feel like it would bring some relief.

[Seraphim]

One of my fav channels. 

[Seraphim]

 

[Seraphim]

I have been trying to get ahold of the provincial disability programme to change my son’s address because the office he gets his money from and his case worker will change. Think I can get through ? Nope . I left my number for them to call me. 

[boltnrun]

14 minutes ago, Seraphim said:

I have been trying to get ahold of the provincial disability programme to change my son’s address because the office he gets his money from and his case worker will change. Think I can get through ? Nope . I left my number for them to call me. 

Is there a way to do it online? Or can his caseworker assist?

[Seraphim]

4 minutes ago, boltnrun said:

Is there a way to do it online? Or can his caseworker assist?

He won’t do any of it online. He wants to talk to the actual case worker but the case worker extension system where you punch in the extension they don’t seem to be using right now and everything is being funnelled through the reception system. It seems everybody and their dog is still working from home. It is all so aggravating. 

[Seraphim]

Wow, Sirhan Sirhan was paroled. 

[Seraphim]

We had a very scary few moments here today. One of my kitties got a reusable grocery bag trapped around his neck and was running through the house. My son tried to catch him the cat got away and my son found him a few mins later hanging by the bag in the coils of my box spring. 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😓😓It wasn’t tight around his neck but he was trapped . My son freed him. 

[boltnrun]

5 minutes ago, Seraphim said:

We had a very scary few moments here today. One of my kitties got a reusable grocery bag trapped around his neck and was running through the house. My son tried to catch him the cat got away and my son found him a few mins later hanging by the bag in the coils of my box spring. 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😓😓It wasn’t tight around his neck but he was trapped . My son freed him. 

Oh, how scary!  I'm so glad your son saved your kitty's life.

[Seraphim]

22 minutes ago, boltnrun said:

Oh, how scary!  I'm so glad your son saved your kitty's life.

It was very lucky !! I am so glad we were home ! It was a reusable cloth grocery bag and my Kitty got a handle strap around his neck some how. It wasn’t tight but he  was definitely trapped and he was hanging by his neck by the strap . Again not tight but he was pulling to get loose. He definitely could have been hurt. 

[luminousone]

On 8/27/2021 at 2:40 PM, Seraphim said:

Wow, Sirhan Sirhan was paroled. 

Ugh. I really am scratching my head about that one.

[Seraphim]

6 minutes ago, luminousone said:

Ugh. I really am scratching my head about that one.

It seems two of Robert’s sons supported it . I guess they feel he is reformed. It was his 16th attempt at parole . But he has spent almost the entirety of his life in prison. He has spent 53 years in prison and is 77. I guess the two of Robert’s sons spoke with him and felt he deserved his freedom now. 

[luminousone]

4 minutes ago, Seraphim said:

It seems two of Robert’s sons supported it . I guess they feel he is reformed. It was his 16th attempt at parole . But he has spent almost the entirety of his life in prison. He has spent 53 years in prison and is 77. I guess the two of Robert’s sons spoke with him and felt he deserved his freedom now. 

There is no “wow” button, but that is how I feel.

[Seraphim]

10 minutes ago, luminousone said:

There is no “wow” button, but that is how I feel.

As they said it is Christian to forgive. One of his son’s said he had always feared meeting with Sirhan but felt less so after and felt moved to forgive. 

[Seraphim]

So there is a pre pack day. Um what? We found this out Friday. They coming Monday to pack our “ non essentials “. Tuesday they will pack the rest . Tomorrow I have to unplug my fridge and so the eating out starts . Wednesday they will load my house on the truck . Then the person I hired to clean will clean the house. Thursday housing will come and clear us seeing if the house and yard are good enough to sign us off. Friday morning we drive away to our new home and get our keys.

I just want this done. I had a migraine earlier last week and then that went and the next day I had a TN flare and then today I had a gastro attack where I had IBS with throwing up. 

[Seraphim]

I got to see 3 movies with J and her daughter before I left. It was nice to go to the theatre. 

[luminousone]

28 minutes ago, Seraphim said:

So there is a pre pack day. Um what? We found this out Friday. They coming Monday to pack our “ non essentials “. Tuesday they will pack the rest . Tomorrow I have to unplug my fridge and so the eating out starts . Wednesday they will load my house on the truck . Then the person I hired to clean will clean the house. Thursday housing will come and clear us seeing if the house and yard are good enough to sign us off. Friday morning we drive away to our new home and get our keys.

I just want this done. I had a migraine earlier last week and then that went and the next day I had a TN flare and then today I had a gastro attack where I had IBS with throwing up. 

Thinking of you!!