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maritalbliss86

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  1. Yes I've seen this. Leaving and moving on is better than when the man IS pressured to marry the woman he lived with 10+ years, because then they're both grouchy and miserable all the time. Better to just pick someone you actually DO love and want to commit to (someone you *can't* live without), than live for endless years cohabitating with someone you could live without and don't' care about enough to marry. The couples we've known that lived too long together before marriage, bicker at each other and have sour attitudes once they do marry. It's strange, but maybe it's because they were pressured into it and really never loved each other enough.
  2. For instance... in Texas it can get really crazy... "Next, if your families refer to you and your spouse as husband and wife and treat you all this way as well that is another sign of a common law marriage. If your partner’s father is calling you his “son in law”, you are no longer in a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship. You have two options at this stage: you can either put a stop to that by confirming that you and your significant other are not married, or you cannot take any action. By not taking action you are essentially confirming the common law marriage. Do not be surprised that if you attempt to end the relationship with a simple conversation, your partner may argue that a divorce is necessary.
  3. Also if the relationship goes badly, you may be under the same kind of communal property laws as a regular marriage would be (she could end up getting the house like in a divorce) anyway. Cohabitating itself is a very big step... you shouldn't do it unless you know for sure this is going to end well.
  4. Forgive me if someone already pointed this out, but... depending on where you live, sometimes just cohabitating together becomes what is legally called a, Common Law Marriage anyway. So it still makes things harder to get out of depending on what your laws are.
  5. Also, we tried letting our daughter walk him (indoors) on the leash, and he did NOT want to obey or respect her at all! And the problem is that he's so much stronger than her, he can bolt away or pull her too fast. We tried to correct it, but it also makes her more afraid of him. He almost didn't want to be led by our 2nd oldest, either, it took awhile for him to get used to it, and then it seemed like he'd only pull sometimes. But I get it... lots of practice/training should help
  6. Just an update: This morning he did and is continuing to do great with staying off the couch. The step-ladder thing seemed too confusing for him yesterday, but I'm going slow and not expecting him to learn it fast. He actually can jump without a running start, and I realized that yesterday. I mean he can jump from just being on the ground, to over 4 feet in the air when outside (it's amazing to watch). So I do think Lost was correct in that he just wants to get there fast. He was so much slower today, and remembered his training it seemed. I could tell he really wanted up, but he controlled himself and finally decided to lay at our feet. At first he was laying under the coffee table, and would look out at me and the kids gloomily LOL, almost like he was pouting by putting himself under there. But then as time went on, he moved to being by our feet. Dogs are so funny... I confess, I'm not really a dog person, we're more cat people, but we love him ❤️ I'm excited to see how easy it is just after yesterday.
  7. So grateful for our sweet little dog ❤️. I know he has his couch issues (LOL) but he really is such a pleasure.
  8. That's awful 😞 And yes, I'm wondering if there's an infestation somewhere of their caterpillars because this is a lot of butterflies. They're definitely not moths... and it's not migration season, and they're not migrating anyway... their flight patterns are different when they're migrating. Migration looks more like they're just, "passing through," and it has a definite direction. These ones are just flitting around, staying mostly in our yard and flying over the back at times, but I do agree the overall effect is beautiful. ❤️
  9. Thank you, I think I'm going to go with the check collar Lost suggested.
  10. That describes him for sure. Thank you for the suggestions 🙂
  11. You sound amazing at dog training! Thank you again so much for your advice and ideas, it's very appreciated!
  12. Yes, Lost, we've noticed this a lot! I think he thinks he's above our younger 2 in his station or something. That is just SO hard because he loves being up there with us! I feel like I'm the one that needs the training LOL Like separation anxiety or something... he's therapeutic to have up there for me when I'm with them. But I get it, I can control it with a lot of training, thank you so much! Ok this is good to know^^ We've been doing that, it's like a doggie time out or something, but we've only been doing it semi-recently. And he pees when he knows he's going to be put up, or does the yelping like he's dying. Ok... we don't have a check collar, but I'll look into that. It REALLY bothered the baby... I mean it sounds like he's being abused! Is there anything we can do about how he'll pee also? We let him out fairly often to go potty outside, but he still pees if he knows he's being corrected at times. Ok, I had no idea about this. You're right that we use, "Lay down," a lot and he complies very easily... so I can see how it'd be confusing to hear, "down," when he's outside and playing. We'll try, "Off!" Ok, we'll have to do this, then. I've heard that's what you're supposed to do, but we really don't walk him officially on a leash anymore. He plays outside in the back and has lots of room to run, but it's never like a controlled thing with a leash. I tried a few times to take him for a walk during the day (taking all the kids and a stroller). We had just moved a year ago and I was heavily pregnant, and it was so awful with all the kids etc. trying to keep control of the leash, or my older son having trouble with it, and pushing a stroller and then being 8 to 9 months pregnant... I just gave up. BUT I mean my husband and I could take turns and walk him with our daughter in the evenings for that training. He barks incessantly though at other people/dogs/anything it seems... so we'd have to train him for that, too. Ugh we've been way too lax.
  13. Just adding for more clarity... I always have thought of him as our, "lap-dog," so it makes sense, right, that he'd always want up on the couches almost in our laps or cuddling with the kids? But I'll try the ramp thing. We have a tiny step ladder so I'll start using it this afternoon.
  14. Ok... yes, I understand he'll forget because we've been so inconsistent. Thank you for the advice... it seems to already be helping a lot!
  15. Yes, I have used treats before, but our kids kept getting into them to help train him, and 1) over-feeding him treats which I corrected and they stopped, and then 2) when our daughter was younger, she actually would eat the dog treats 😱 LOL. Now the baby tries to eat the dog food all the time... which we've corrected by keeping the baby away and feeding him at only certain times (not having it out randomly all the time). Gratefully, our dog has learned to eat when it's down until he's full, then we put his food up high again. But when I put the treats up high last year, I completely forgot about them. It's insane trying to keep on top of it with a baby, and after this last baby was born, we kind of pushed a lot of his training to the back of our minds and just thought he'd eventually calm down with time. Now we've been realizing a whole year has passed - it's crazy how fast time has flown by. But he's doing great now even with just a little telling him no. He's calm and lays down near our feet which is working 👍
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