Telling him about his posture

[thealchemist]

Perhaps being subjected to this from your past makes it seem normal to you?

I think this has some merit. I didn't read that part as closely but I would look into this.

[katrina1980]

I am not correcting him every time. As I said about the other issue, I have not even mentioned that he did anything at all, I pointed to something that I did. And about his posture, I would not point to it every time he does it. I would just do it once, to tell that there is that and that's it. I would not keep correcting him, like I have not done for the other thing these few times he slipped.

 

I am imagining how your "correcting" him might go down (not well from his end), so unless you want to play the "mother" role (which I wouldn't recommend) leave it alone.

 

You chose him, warts and all.

 

Learn to accept and if you can't, move on and find another guy with better posture.

 

JMO!

[ThatwasThen]

When you see him slouching sneak up behind him and pinch his bum... that outta get him to stand up straight! 0.o

[DancingFool]

When you see him slouching sneak up behind him and pinch his bum... that outta get him to stand up straight! 0.o

 

lol....this thread is pretty hilarious.

 

Honestly, most people fall into roughly two categories. Those who will be horrified and offended that you pointed out that something isn't good and those who will be offended that you didn't. Personally, if I'm doing something that makes me look like sh$t and my SO just lets me go at it, I'd feel pretty much betrayed by that. Like seriously, you couldn't open your mouth and give me a heads up? Seems like a lot of people on this thread swing the other way, how dare you point out something that's not right.

 

Honestly, OP, maybe just have one of those simple conversations with him like would he like to know if "those proverbial jeans make him look like sh$t" or if he wants to do his own thing and doesn't care about your or anyone else's opinion about it. Then you will know if you can be direct and just tell him, "hey you are slouching" or if you need to be quiet and mind your own business.

[ThatwasThen]

I've always been the "tell me if I have food in my teeth" kinda gal.

 

I heard a joke from a comedian years ago that made me lol.

 

Her: Do these pants make my arse look fat?

Him: No your fat arse makes your arse look fat?

 

bahaaahahh

 

Some will find it funny, some won't.

 

Now, I suppose if the hubs was telling me every other day that something wasn't right about me, I'd start to get a complex...

[thealchemist]

The comparison of this to the "food stuck in teeth" seems off.

 

Food stuck in teeth is more comparable to telling someone they smell and you would appreciate it it they wear deodorant.

 

Telling someone to stand differently is more along the lines of getting on to someone for walking in a different way than you think they should.

[boltnrun]

How does his belly sticking out affect him? Affect others?

 

Or...is it just that YOU don't like the way it looks.

 

And why? Because others might notice? Because it makes him unattractive to you?

 

I'm confused why this would even be an issue.

[DanZee]

Well, if he was in the Army, the drill sergeant would tell him to suck in his gut! You can buy him a back brace that would pull his shoulders back and pull in his belly.

[Jibralta]

Hi All,

 

I need a bit of advice.

 

My boyfriend is tall, he has a good physique but he quite often stands with his belly sticking out (and t is not a good look on him), how can I suggest in a nice way (without sounding too pedantic or like a nanny) to keep track of it?

 

It is like he would need to stand straight without berating, he is not fat and it doesn't stick out when he stands straight.

 

Of myself, even if I am not very tall, I know that I tend to slouch, do you think I should first say to him, give me a sign if I slouch... so that I can to the same to him?

 

Thanks,

 

Mikaila

 

My boyfriend stands like this to "rest" his back. It would hurt me to do that, but for him, it works. Maybe ask your boyfriend if he's comfortable that way?

[Blank State]

I am not correcting him every time. As I said about the other issue, I have not even mentioned that he did anything at all, I pointed to something that I did. And about his posture, I would not point to it every time he does it. I would just do it once, to tell that there is that and that's it. I would not keep correcting him, like I have not done for the other thing these few times he slipped.

This. A girl I was seeing told me that I had no butt (I'm very tall and thin) and it really got to me. I never had any issue with my body before that, but after that I started obsessing over it. I started googling things like "Do girls like guys with small butts" and things like that, looking at myself in the mirror, and doing squats endlessly trying to put mass on to my butt, and now I have it in my mind. I thought before that that I had a normal rear end and never paid attention to it. Now I'm insecure about it.

 

Point is, if you were attracted to someone enough to start dating them, don't start picking them apart trying to make them into what you think they should be.

[Wiseman2]

That's exactly what's happening here.

the drill sergeant would tell him to suck in his gut!

[Unreasonable]

Stop slouching sounds like something an overbearing mom or old-timey school marm would say to an angsty teenager. I can guarantee that is just as bad a look as the actual slouching.