IamMad Posted January 14, 2018 Share Posted January 14, 2018 When I met my GF she was a virgin while I was having ONS all the time. I loved her at first sight and decided to wait for her to be ready, which took months and months. After 4 years we broke up, big clash, resentment on both sides and we cut all communication. I thought that’s what she wanted, now she is living her life, she and I are done. 3 months later she sent me an email full of reproches, this email upset me even more as I was taking her for responsible of our break up, hence I didn’t answer. 3 months later I was told by a common friend that she was still waiting for me, could not forget me, and had not had any sexual relationship over the last 6 months. Thing is she always said it’s impossible for me to have sex without feelings, what you used to do is disgusting, the gir.s you did it have no morale etc. After having waited for her for so long to have sex, to respect her values, I thought that this was great that I would be her only man, kind of a fairy tale, although I had never been interested in having a virgin at first. So I had told her many times that I would never be able to get back with her if one day we were broken up and she would have had sex with someone else. I wanted to keep this magic which I had never been looking for. So getting back to our 6-momth break up, when I heard she had not done anything, I couldn’t believe it because we were over and had not had any communication, so why on earth would she not do anything. I then felt guilty, and decided to forgive her for our break up. I started talking to her and one the first thing she to.d me was I didn’t do anything sexual, because I am not a girl that open my legs like this, whereas you during our break up had sex friends, ONS, etc. I never denied it and was open to tell her everything, it she said she didn’t want to. I asked her them if she had had sex with anyone, and she told me yes I had a sex friend. I couldn’t believe it, and said in that case I am not going back with you because a/ I was willing to forgive you for this 6 month break up because it showed you did not try to find better, just we’re too proud to admit mistakes and try to get me back and b/ because I could not believe she would have had sex with a guy on the first night, and then continued seeing him just for sex while she was always saying never on earth she would such a thing, only s do it and c/I find this unfair that I respected her va.ues and waited for her while I had never been doing this with other girls, and another guy would get it just like that. When she saw I would not come back she said she was lying just to see my reaction and of course she had not done anything. Since then we have been together for 18 months, that means now 6 years of relationship. And everything was perfect. But I had asked her a lot of times if she had really not done anything with anyone. And she always swore yes, and when I asked why she said because she knew if she had done this she would never be able to get me back. I felt really guilty for having been to other girls while she was such an angel. One month ago, after me asking again, she finally told me the truth, that she had effectively had a sex friend. She said she decided to have sex with this guy after `I didn’t answer her email and she called the guy went to his and had sex, said only had 3 sexual intercourse with him over 2 months. I could not believe it, I trusted her so much I could never have thought she would lie to me. And that she would do this without feelings, on the first night while she was always claiming never on earth she could do it. I was about to propose to her, to that I like marriage, but this was very important for her and I after all thought that she deserved it, and she having done nothing in the hope of getting ,e back during 6 months while having noth9ng to expect was a sign that yes this girl will never give up on me and that yes I could believe her when she said we would never divorce. My proposal is now cancelled, and I don’t know what to do. Everything was so perfect between us, but also because I thought she was above all the other girls, so truthful and with values that I was feeling bad not having had. Part of me also hate her. She lied to me for 18 months, took advantage of it to depict herself as a Saint, that it was because she was waiting for me. She kept him on Facebook as well when she had told me she had removed all the guys she would have kissed or flirted with during these 6 months, all but him. She had talked to this guy about me, just after we went back together she put a picture of she and I back together in happiness and the guy liked the picture, 1 month after having had sex for the last time with her. But she still didn’t feel she should remove it. And I only saw that now. Whereas I had always been beaten up by her for having girls like my picture, such that I am no longer using Facebook to avoid her getting mad. How could I forgive her and shall I? My problem here is that she is the one that always kept repeating I can’t have sex without feelings, girls that do that are disgusting. And she kept repeating that even after she had done it. I am upset then that she can do what she says is for s only, and even after doing it keep saying it and don’t think this applies to her. We were broken up and she had all the rights to do whatever she wanted, it I would not have gone back to her if I had known the truth. She would have made her choices, freely and I have nothing to say. But if she wanted to come back with me, she should not have done it and instead try to get me back. She created her virginal pedestal, not me, I am therefore hurt that this was only a lie. She loves me more than everything, and I don’t want to forget about us just for some sexual intercourse. But this is my vision of her that is broken now. A vision that she created again, I never forced her to put hersel on this pedestal. During 6 years she kept blaming me for being able to have sex with girls like this, and saying that the girls I was doing it had no self respect. So what to say about you doing the same? Link to comment
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