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  1. I am going against the grain. OP, you said it yourself. The two of you were not official yet. You were seeing each other but not officially dating. Did he sleep with this girl after the two of you officially started dating? If not then as I have been told so many times by others, it isn’t cheating. They two of you were only seeing one another. The lying about it was wrong. This is something the two of you need to talk about. I don’t believe in lying to protect someone’s feelings or anything else in a relationship. There are those that say it’s ok to lie at times, I am not one of them. There are those that tell a cheater to lie to the betrayed SO to protect they betrayed’s feelings and so they don’t hurt them. If you stay in the relationship set the ground rules. One should be no lying. He was wrong to lie about it. I can see why he would. He waited a long time to get a chance to date you and he doesn’t want it time end so soon, if ever. He did stand by you after you injuries along with the family friend when no one else really did. That says a lot about him as well. Do what you need to do.
  2. The police in some areas can press charges with the evidence they have. The wife/gf doesn’t need to do so. It depends on the laws in your state.
  3. Please change your username. Your not stupid, you made a bad decision. Are you planning on working things out with your husband? If so, why? It isn’t for love because you would have never cheated on him if you truly did love him. Do you have a male relative that can stay with you in case your husband comes by the house? Are you allowed to change the locks and dead bolts on the doors? Talk with a family lawyer about what is going on and see if you can. Also talk with a locksmith about a door brace bar or you can get one at a home supply store. It helps to prevent a door from being kicked in. Easy to install. You really need to keep yourself safe before anything. Your husband is a POS for hurting you. What you did was wrong. What your husband did is inexcusable, he needs to go to jail for it. You will never be safe with him. How did your husband find out about the affair? Are you certain he doesn’t already know who the OM is? If he is looking for him, he might know who it is.
  4. I think she has one already from what she posted. There have been many women killed with a restraining order in place. Some of them were killed in front of there kids. They would have been better off getting a weapon and being trained to use it.
  5. I completely agree but will add when defending someone that can’t defend themself. I did beat the crap out of someone that hit his wife/gf in a parking lot a few cars from my wife and I.
  6. TinyDance we might have to disagree on the never a reason for violence. I think we both agree that OP didn’t deserve to be beaten up and put in the hospital. She did nothing to deserve it. Being yelled and and called some names maybe but nothing to warrant any violence.
  7. It isn’t normal. That doesn’t meant it doesn’t happen. Some people just lose the ability to control the rage that comes over them. Then there are those that are just evil and use something like this as an excuse to act out. I agree we have all had bad things happen to us. But unlike some of us, you haven’t been in one where violence was the only way out. 3 men watched a house for a week of a single father and his daughter. They showed up with everything they needed to abduct her when her dad left for work one morning. They broke in the front door and went for the stairs. The 12 year old girl caught the first one at the top of the stairs with a 12 gauge round to the chest. Another one fell at the bottom of the stairs and the 3rd collapsed outside the house. Turned out the girl was the skeet shooting champ in her area for her age group. The men were illegals with ties to child sex trade. There is a time and place for violence.
  8. Some states even charge the person defending themself.
  9. He would have never snapped if she didn’t cheat and him finding out. I said that she didn’t deserve to be hit. Her husband should go to jail for a long time for doing so. No one deserves what happened to OP. I never said she did.
  10. Is it your fault that your husband snapped, yes. That doesn’t mean you deserved to be put in the hospital. Violence against a cheating spouse is never right. There was a betrayed spouse in England that lured the OM to the family farm and killed him. Some people just lose their sanity when betrayed like this. Was your husband a violent person before this happened?
  11. A RO is useless. She would be dead before the authorities got to her.
  12. I would never say anything like that to any of my girlfriends. It isn’t a joke. He basically called you a psycho tagging him as your boyfriend when he isn’t.
  13. There are medications to help those that are bipolar. The problem is they don’t always stay on them. My uncle is bipolar and one of the greatest individuals I know when on his meds. Then he starts thinking he doesn’t need the meds anymore. Then he will simply disappear. The question is this, are you willing to put the work into the relationship only to have it exploded in your face one day possibly?
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