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  1. I don't know, curiosity I suppose, the hope that she might be single again perhaps.
  2. Her WhatsApp profile photo - stupid idea, I know
  3. Time for my annual bump 🤦🏻‍♂️ I came across a photo of her and she appears to be expecting. It has hit me in the stomach like a severe body blow. 3 years plus since the breakup and I'm still not over it. What the hell is wrong with me and when will I ever get my life back...
  4. Thanks for your reply and insight. I'm just torn because although I realised it was over for a long time now, this photo has really, well, sickened me. Is it normal to feel like this almost two years post breakup? And is it normal to basically go back to square one just because of a photo? To feel like all the colour of your life has been drained since this girl left it? I'm at a loss how to move on with my joyless existence, life has become so different.
  5. Hey everyone, hope you're all doing OK in the current climate wherever in the world you are. I'm just checking in here as I'm a little low and thought it would be good to get things off my chest. Basically, I got a happy birthday Whatsapp from her last June to which I replied to thank her. Following that, there had been no contact until the end of February gone, no Happy Christmas etc. Basically, I touched base with her as she's from a region which was severely affected by the virus at that stage and with all her family back there I thought it'd be rude not to check in and see if everything was OK. She was thankful that I did and everything was fine, thankfully. About a month later, towards the end of March, things had really escalated in that region and I dropped another note wishing her family all the best. She responded and we sent a few messages and all was good. Later that day her mother, who is living in that region, texted me and saying she was very happy that I was asking after the family and that it was good that I had a good relationship with her daughter after the breakup. She mentioned that she'd love to meet me for a coffee when all this is over. A few hours later, my ex texted me apologising that her mother had texted me (in a nice way). We both joked about it and we had our first proper communication since the breakup, catching up on what we had both been up to the past few years, work-wise and not personal lives. It was nice and I ended it and said that it was nice talking to her and told her to take care. A few weeks later it was her birthday (beginning of April) and I wished her a good one which she appreciated. Last night I was going through my Whatsapp contacts and noticed that she had a new profile photo. It's a photo of her and her boyfriend (obvious from the photo) and it was taken in her hometown. It shocked me and I've been reeling ever since. We broke up in June 2018, almost two years ago, and it feels like it was yesterday. In the four years we were together she never had a photo of me on her Whatsapp profile (which is fine). I feel sick and have been feeling like this all day. I thought I was over her but I clearly am not. I live in the same place we used to live in and memories have been flooding back all day since I seen the photo. Of course it's perfectly normal that she has moved on and has a boyfriend and has their photo up, it's been two years. Why on earth am I feeling like this? It feels like a bad dream today and I feel like my life has completely stalled since she left me in 2018. We had absolutely no contact from June 2019 - February 2020. I've seen many girls since the breakup. Maintained NC. Worked out, worked on myself, got stuck into my job. I feel that this girl, who was absolutely amazing, has ruined any other potential relationships I might have as I'll always be comparing them to her. I think about her every day. I wonder would I have been better off never meeting her. Anyone else know where I'm coming from? I feel like I'm back to square one and this is really taking a toll on me.
  6. Checking in a year later and nothing has changed! Happy new year to all you guys.
  7. Fear of rejection, I suppose. Also the fact that coming back begging after being dumped is probably not the best move in terms of attraction as opposed to appearing to have moved on independently and confidently in her eyes. Happy New Year to all the great folk on this site and all the best for 2019!
  8. Hope everyone's having a good Christmas. I was down with the family and just got back up today. She texted me on Christmas Day, wished a happy one to me and my family and mentioned the happy memories she had of previous years spent there with me. I thanked her and wished her and hers all the best for 2019. She responded wishing the same for me. It was nice of her and I'm taking it for what it was - a text. It did set me back a bit for the day but I got over it with a few drinks. I just wonder if she still holds a flame for me... She might be thinking the same at the other end and is worried about reaching out in case I'm spoken for now. She may well be spoken for now, on the other hand. I suppose I should just knuckle down now and move on to 2019 - I am the dumpee and the ball's in her court if she ever harboured any thoughts of a reconciliation, right?
  9. First Christmas without her and first Christmas alone in 5 years. They say time's a healer but this seems to be taking forever. 6 months since the breakup and it feels like my life has been on hold ever since. What will 2019 bring? I'll keep going but the colour has drained from my life since she left.
  10. I notified her of the post anyway, thought it was the decent thing to do. She messaged me her new address and thanked me when the post arrived, all very cordial. I don't regret doing it, I'd think it kinda puerile if I didn't. I have to say though that I miss her dearly. It's been over 4 months since the breakup, we've only communicated twice briefly in the interim. All in all, I'd love to have her back. I know I should keep with the NC but I just wonder what she's up to, how she feels. She might even feel the same, who knows, but she's always been stubborn. So I might never find out. I'll keep up the NC and trying to move on but man it's not easy.
  11. I don't know her forwarding address though so I was wondering if I should contact her so she can decide what to do with it
  12. Some post arrived for her today. Should I inform her or just leave it?
  13. It's now just over 4 months since the break-up and 2 months of the latest bout of NC. I've been dating very frequently lately and it's actually making things worse if anything and setting me back. I hadn't really thought about her in some time and months had passed since I'd watch any of those crappy NC YouTube videos or even checked in here regularly (no offence!). Each passing date just seems to remind me of what a special person I had and how I blew it. No girl seems to compare unfortunately. I had hoped that dating would help me move on but it's clearly not and I think being single would actually be preferable to settling for someone less than herself which they all seem to be, however harsh that sounds. I'd take her back in a heartbeat. I'll continue with the NC, which I can do without any hassle be it googling her or even looking at old photos, but I don't seem to be getting over this. The colour seems like it's gone from my life and has been for the past four months...
  14. Hey, just checking in here again. Haven't had any further contact since, almost one month ago. Joined tinder and have been on a few dates. Still keep comparing them to herself though, is this normal after all this time?
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