mandeelove Posted January 4, 2018 Share Posted January 4, 2018 So in November I made a post about my ex who always pops up in my life every 6 months or so. We broke up 2 years ago. He acts like he wants me back, then throws me out again. It has been discovered he is nothing but a fickled lover, not sure who or what he wants. So i made peace with that and happy it is no longer me he toys with. I went nc on dec 1st. Ive been doing great. Also he has tried to search me on linked in which I didnt fall for. I think its crazy that he searches me but HAS a GF. This brings me to my question. In nov he claimed they broke up, hence why he came back to me. He buttered me up and talked to me non stop. Also said he never loved her like he loved me. Then dec 1st said he is going back to her. Also i came in contact with a girl he dated in that month who told me he was also trying to butter her up. He used the same lines on us both. Thats when i made my peace in my mind that he hasnt changed his cheater ways and i went nc. It felt great. Well on instrgram a few days ago i came across his current gfs page. It appears that he never broke up with her back in nov when he was talking to me/begging to see me....He was talking to me and girls and still with her.. He played us all basically. But im aggravated that I got played stupid. I didnt deserve that. Should i be petty and tell his gf what hes done...or leave it alone? Link to comment
Andrina Posted January 4, 2018 Share Posted January 4, 2018 Don't mess with other people's lives. You don't know what horrors might happen if you opened that can of worms. You did yourself a disservice by examining her page. For closure, don't subject yourself to a past that involves him or anyone in his life. It prevents closure. It stirs up anger inside you. Don't reply to any further contact with him, or do reply and tell him never to contact you again. Link to comment
Starlight925 Posted January 4, 2018 Share Posted January 4, 2018 https://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=542404 I responded to most of your other threads about this guy, and you already know the answer. Block him. Complete NC. Which, if you really were doing, you wouldn't know he has a new GF, would you? So yes, leave her alone. You will never move on if you keep letting him come back, go away, go back to her, tell you sweet nothings, and continue this cycle. Link to comment
SweetGirl28 Posted January 4, 2018 Share Posted January 4, 2018 Leave it alone. Stay NC and don't stalk anyone's social media. Link to comment
DancingFool Posted January 4, 2018 Share Posted January 4, 2018 2 years and you are still in this mess? Come on. Cheaters are liars and they don't change. If you genuinely want this piece of garbage out of your life, then stop looking him up or whoever he is involved with etc. As far as you are concerned, he is dead to you. Be smarter than to keep carrying on with this creep in any capacity. He isn't your problem anymore and if the other girls wants to believe his bs, that's her problem and absolutely none of your business. You aren't going to hurt him anyway. He already knows what he is doing and likely will totally make you out to be some psycho ex of his who is just so attached, she won't leave him alone, poor dumb creature..... Why expose yourself like that? You aren't going to win here, but you will come across like a crazy fool. Link to comment
Hollyj Posted January 4, 2018 Share Posted January 4, 2018 Leave it in the past. Try to understand why you kept on returning to this creep. Focus on your self esteem. Link to comment
Starlight925 Posted January 4, 2018 Share Posted January 4, 2018 Look, I get why you want to tell her. He hurt you, and you want to tell her, so she'll (supposedly) break up with him, and you can hurt him back. But you know what? You know him so well, don't you? You know he'll just tell her how "crazy" you are, and he'll butter her up, and he'll post happier than ever SM pics. This will backfire on you. And you will be writing another post about how upset you still are. Do not do it. Link to comment
DaisyMayPorter Posted January 4, 2018 Share Posted January 4, 2018 Please leave him in the past and do not contact him and do not contact her. Let his current girl friend deal with his b.s. -- she will figure it out soon enough if she hasn't already. But she does not need you to tell her. That just keeps you in the mix, and it will prevent you from moving on even longer. Just forget about them and know that eventually she will figure it out. And you can move on to a healthy, drama-less relationship where you are the only person in that person's life. Link to comment
boltnrun Posted January 4, 2018 Share Posted January 4, 2018 If you've made your peace, why did you stalk his girlfriend's page? You can't just "come across" someone's instagram, you searched for it and decided to look at it. Why would you do that if you're over it? Seems like you still have some kind of feelings for that guy. Maybe you resent his girlfriend because she "has" him and you don't. But really, what does she have that's worthwhile? If you've truly made peace you would let it go and stop revisiting that time In your life. Link to comment
yatsue Posted January 4, 2018 Share Posted January 4, 2018 Truth be told, I couldn't be bothered to tell the GF (too much drama, aftermath of the shoot the messenger syndrome, the emotional toll, stalled healing, etc). On the flip side, I would want to know if my partner was cheating on me ASAP. I believe all of us would want the opportunity to at least decide whether we want to stay with a known cheater or not, even if we end up not leaving. If you accept the consequences you will likely face (some stated above), by all means tell her. Just know the outcome may be different than you expect and the probability of this turning into a negative situation is moderate to high. Make sure you have concrete evidence though, or don't even tell her. Link to comment
Annia Posted January 4, 2018 Share Posted January 4, 2018 Just ignore him and block and delete. You need to move on... the rest is none of your business. Link to comment
mandeelove Posted January 4, 2018 Author Share Posted January 4, 2018 https://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=542404 I responded to most of your other threads about this guy, and you already know the answer. Block him. Complete NC. Which, if you really were doing, you wouldn't know he has a new GF, would you? So yes, leave her alone. You will never move on if you keep letting him come back, go away, go back to her, tell you sweet nothings, and continue this cycle.That post is about a different guy... The one this post about is an ex from 3 years ago. Thank you regardless. Link to comment
mandeelove Posted January 5, 2018 Author Share Posted January 5, 2018 2 years and you are still in this mess? Come on. Cheaters are liars and they don't change. If you genuinely want this piece of garbage out of your life, then stop looking him up or whoever he is involved with etc. As far as you are concerned, he is dead to you. Be smarter than to keep carrying on with this creep in any capacity. He isn't your problem anymore and if the other girls wants to believe his bs, that's her problem and absolutely none of your business. You aren't going to hurt him anyway. He already knows what he is doing and likely will totally make you out to be some psycho ex of his who is just so attached, she won't leave him alone, poor dumb creature..... Why expose yourself like that? You aren't going to win here, but you will come across like a crazy fool.Thank you. 100 percent right in your whole post.. I will not expose him . Link to comment
mandeelove Posted January 5, 2018 Author Share Posted January 5, 2018 Thanks to all posters !!!. Great points . I decided to not do a thing about this. Moving on from it and I have blocked him since Dec. 1st . Like everyone said, he will make me out to be a psycho . Regardless of proof....Also I will stop looking at social media regarding them. Its pointless. Thanks again everyone. Link to comment
Starlight925 Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 That post is about a different guy... The one this post about is an ex from 3 years ago. Thank you regardless. Wait, so all this is about a guy from 3 years ago? He should have, long ago, been blocked and stopped. Link to comment
mandeelove Posted January 5, 2018 Author Share Posted January 5, 2018 Wait, so all this is about a guy from 3 years ago? He should have, long ago, been blocked and stopped.Yes he popped up every 4-6 months always claiming i was the love of his life. Etc. So it ended years ago but was still very much present because of the reappearances. I agree-should of been blocked. Now he is and will stay blocked. Link to comment
Kerryalex Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 What ended your relationship in the first place? Did you leave him? I ask because I think I am going through what his girlfriend is going through but I have no proof. I so want the girls he is playing to let me know. It is not them I believe are at fault, but him. I wouldn't fault them at all for letting me know. I would THANK them. But that is just me. Most women would proabaly get confused and lash out at you. Regardless. He is not my forever man. I don't take him seriously. So maybe the girl he is with doesn't take him seriously either. Just using him till she finds someone worthy. ... Ah spiteful love. I'm not proud of it. Sorry this is a dark answer Link to comment
mandeelove Posted January 5, 2018 Author Share Posted January 5, 2018 What ended your relationship in the first place? Did you leave him? I ask because I think I am going through what his girlfriend is going through but I have no proof. I so want the girls he is playing to let me know. It is not them I believe are at fault, but him. I wouldn't fault them at all for letting me know. I would THANK them. But that is just me. Most women would proabaly get confused and lash out at you. Regardless. He is not my forever man. I don't take him seriously. So maybe the girl he is with doesn't take him seriously either. Just using him till she finds someone worthy. ... Ah spiteful love. I'm not proud of it. Sorry this is a dark answerHe actually cheated on me via sexting. Go figure. And the girl found me on social media through his tagged pics ...go figure again. I was so mad when she told me because we had to break up but now years later I see she saved me! If it werent for her I wouldnt know his dirt or catch on. I was in la la land. So its funny the situation is reversed now and I have the info to help a girl out. It looks like she is very in love from her posts of him. Same thing like i was. I was very in love too. Hearing he cheated, blind sided me. Im like you. Id want to know too. Lots of people say what they dont know wont hurt them. But im the opposite. However I decided to keep the info to myself. I feel shes so in love she wouldnt believe me anyway and in the end I will lose. He will call me crazy. I do have proof on text message of him saying things but Im trying to take the high road lol Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 Proceed with dignity and no interest or time/effort in him. Don't make yourself look like the vindictive psycho-ex type.Should i be petty and tell his gf what hes done? Link to comment
reinventmyself Posted January 5, 2018 Share Posted January 5, 2018 No. . don't do anything. Because by doing so you unnecessarily bring unneeded drama into your life. Imagine the back lash and craziness it would unleash. I don't know about you but I spend my days trying to keep drama to a minimum, even if it's really tempting. When in doubt, take the high road. Life is just easier when you do. I might however caution him the next time he contacts you that you will consider it. That will run him off pretty quick Link to comment
mandeelove Posted January 5, 2018 Author Share Posted January 5, 2018 No. . don't do anything. Because by doing so you unnecessarily bring unneeded drama into your life. Imagine the back lash and craziness it would unleash. I don't know about you but I spend my days trying to keep drama to a minimum, even if it's really tempting. When in doubt, take the high road. Life is just easier when you do. I might however caution him the next time he contacts you that you will consider it. That will run him off pretty quickYes if he bothers me ever again I will use this to scare him off. He just searched me on linked in the other day but if he actually approaches me I will say it. Thanks. I do not want drama. U are right. High road is better even though itstough to swallow afterhe played with my head. Link to comment
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