hereigoagain1 Posted July 7, 2013 Share Posted July 7, 2013 I hurt. I have to pass by my exes place to get to mine. She moved a man in with her a month after we broke up. Well, this morning she was siting outside on the front porch with him drinking coffee as I drove by. We used to do that. They both looked at me as I passed. It hurts like hell, but there is nothing I can do , but go on with my life. I am 45 yrs old and I have pretty much resigned to staying single forever. I don't believe in true love any more. People are too selfish and either I pick the wrong people or I have something about me that makes people leave, but I've worked on myself for years and can't figure it out so I'm done. I'd rather a lonely heart than a broken one. Link to comment
hereigoagain1 Posted July 9, 2013 Share Posted July 9, 2013 Now I feel devastated. I just found out that my ex is about to marry the man that she left me for. He is in the process of getting a divorce and in a few months he will be divorced and will marry her. Then he plans on selling the house that he is getting in the divorce so he can build her a new one. I was so good to her and her kids. We never fought, but it was a lie. Apparently she was just a gold digger looking for a bigger, better, deal. I'm so heartbroken. Where is the justice? How can someone lie and cheat you and then go on like nothing ever happened and prosper? It's not right. Where is the Karma? I have no friends or family where I live. She and her kids was all that I had. I don't know where to go from here. Statistically, most relationships fail so that's not worth trying again. Am I doomed to a life of solitude now? I'm I counseling, but I don't want a life alone and I think that that's how it's going to be for me and as painful as that is, I have to accept it. Link to comment
BigKK Posted July 9, 2013 Share Posted July 9, 2013 Day 2 of the Break Up... I'm feeling OK, We went on a two week "break" that I considered it might be the end, so I went through the struggles of living alone...waking up and crying... Did I get a head start on feeling bad? I feel bad I don't feel bad right now... A girl told me last night almost cynically... "don't worry, it'll come in waves" I wanted to marry this woman, give her a star from the heavens, and now I am just indifferent... perhaps I'm still in the shock stage? Link to comment
elle12 Posted July 9, 2013 Share Posted July 9, 2013 Last night I watched a chick flick and cried a whole bunch at the end, but today I feel okay. We broke up two weeks ago today. I am just trying to find the faith to believe that things work out the way they're supposed to, and that if he never talks to me again it's the right thing for both of us. Link to comment
sadgirl23 Posted July 16, 2013 Share Posted July 16, 2013 I have a song playing in my head from the painful drive home we had: "all I've ever wanted was for your damn arms To wrap themselves around me and say Hey, girl you're the prettiest thing my eyes have ever seen Come and lay your bones down with me" Makes me feel like crying. Makes memories of trips away together come flooding back. Getting a lump in my throat. Got to stay strong!! No contact! Link to comment
chamachama Posted July 16, 2013 Share Posted July 16, 2013 I have a song playing in my head from the painful drive home we had: "all I've ever wanted was for your damn arms To wrap themselves around me and say Hey, girl you're the prettiest thing my eyes have ever seen Come and lay your bones down with me" Makes me feel like crying. Makes memories of trips away together come flooding back. Getting a lump in my throat. Got to stay strong!! No contact! And that's why you don't listen to ANYTHING that someone could possibly fall in love to for music until you are completely and utterly over the BU. Try music from Poe, NIN, the Black Keys, tunes that motivate you and maybe even gets you pissed off. But above all, stop it with the sad mushy broken heart lovey dovey BS tunes. They all suck...for now at least lol Pains coming for you anyway....why grab at it? Link to comment
princessxo Posted July 16, 2013 Share Posted July 16, 2013 sad upset hurt angry... in a nut shell like crap Link to comment
MajinGuu Posted July 18, 2013 Share Posted July 18, 2013 My ex just texted me again, for the 5th time in a row. I haven't replied to any text, I have felt tempted lately (been feeling down overall) but didn't do it and don't plan on doing it. Have so much plans for my future and so much motivation, I know what I'm feeling right now is temporary so I'm not letting myself crumble, plus I've discovered this goddamn great serie called Orange Is The New Black and I'm loving this little distraction. Link to comment
mrnicguy6 Posted July 19, 2013 Share Posted July 19, 2013 i used to feel comforted by reading through threads here.. ive started feeling better now and m at the point where... hanging around ena is actually making me sad. lol. Link to comment
mnl25 Posted July 19, 2013 Share Posted July 19, 2013 I feel lost . It's my own fault . My ex loved me and I pushed her away Link to comment
mbee Posted July 19, 2013 Share Posted July 19, 2013 I miss you. Even with all the things you've done, I miss you greatly. I miss your voice. I miss that when I was feeling sad I'd call you. I miss just chatting with you. I miss spending time with you. I miss being with you but your gone now and don't want me anymore. Link to comment
neil213 Posted July 27, 2013 Share Posted July 27, 2013 A bit sad today. Still thinking of her and her son. I don't know. It sucks Link to comment
mnl25 Posted July 27, 2013 Share Posted July 27, 2013 I miss her . Feeling sad . None of the arguing was worth it . Link to comment
blackshaw Posted July 27, 2013 Share Posted July 27, 2013 Did I meet my soulmate at the wrong time? Why?? She left my apartment about 5 hours ago to get the rest of her stuff - panties, some laundry, a dress she wore once out to dinner, her $2.00 toothbrush, and her new pair of work pants that I picked up on one of her non-sleepover nights. I can barely type. My heart stings as though it's been scraped and dragged against sandpaper all day without a break. My throat is parched. Why? Oh..I guess I did resort to yelling. Wow. I am feeling increasingly tired. My eyes are getting heavy. I'm afraid I met my soulmate. Her scent still lingers on the sheets and pillows. She spoke to all five senses. I couldn't squeeze her close enough. The taste of her tears against the round softness of her cheeks still lingers. The knot in my stomach seems to lead the lump in my throat in a last-ditch call-and-response I was so afraid of eventually losing her. And here I am, without her. I'm feeling brain-tired, .Even just now, I almost fell asleep. Maybe it's time. I'll continue this tomorrow. Goodnight. I feel so hurt, so confused. I want to Link to comment
AtTheDriveIn Posted July 27, 2013 Share Posted July 27, 2013 I'm in day 10 of NC. I woke up this morning to go to work and ready to take on the day. I made a list of reasons to move on that I read to myself when I wake up. It really helps to start my day. I'm loaded with positive energy right now. I'm feeling a lot better today than where I was at day 3 of no contact, that's for sure and I hope time says I'm good soon. Have a good day everyone! Link to comment
Looking up Posted July 27, 2013 Share Posted July 27, 2013 Yep. I still love her. Close to 6 months now since break up. Link to comment
Loz333 Posted July 27, 2013 Share Posted July 27, 2013 Devastated. Empty. Depleted. Betrayed. Just indescribably hurt. I finally just unfriended him on Facebook. I couldn't handle seeing things about the new girl any longer. It's an utterly out of body experience. I feel so betrayed and used and left by the wayside after all that we shared, went through, and enjoyed together. And now he's enjoying a summer of love with this new person, doing the same things we did. And I don't exist to him. I'm disgusted and I wish he could just be dead to me. But unlike him, I have a heart and it remembers him. It knows him. It loves him. It doesn't just abandon him. I wish I never met him. I honestly do. I am left with nothing. Nothing I can keep anyway. The memories are just terrible reminders of the person I loved who has now totally trashed those memories and the bond we shared. He was the most important person in my life for so many wonderful reasons. Now he's just gone without a care. It's cruel. Link to comment
blackshaw Posted July 27, 2013 Share Posted July 27, 2013 It's been difficult to leave the house all morning (now afternoon!). Alone all day so far, I've felt so much. It feels as though I can feel both of us. Tears are building up as I'm thinking about what she'd say after she got in one of those moodswings. "I know I'm not easy to get along with," she'd tell me often, after returning from one of her "low" episodes. I could feel how she thought of herself - stuck in a monster costume, tender and fragile on the inside. Scared. Misunderstood. I feel so much sorrow and guilt for not being more patient with her. I want to have her here and just hold her. I want her to just listen to me and see that it could get better. If she'd only agree to work together. But as soon as I say that thought aloud, I know it just isn't time. I have years of experience on her. She has to take the initiative to heal herself. I can't make her. Her issues provoked my insecurities. I feel so much guilt for giving in, instead of being stronger and taking a better lead, and riding out these conflicts. Our relationship was just too stormy. Despite all of this, I have never felt so strongly about someone. I hate that I yearn for her. I really tried to be stronger and gentler. Now it just stings... Link to comment
MajinGuu Posted July 30, 2013 Share Posted July 30, 2013 Today isn't a good day, and the last few days weren't good either... I'm not sure why, I just feel like I'm having withdrawals again. I've been talking to my friend and it felt very nice though, I should have done that much earlier but it was just too difficult for me... I couldn't go deep into the details. I'm glad there is a person I can trust and always count on. I just wish she could have hugged me to sleep but we're not in the same city at the moment and this poor girl needed a good rest after hearing me vent and rage. Link to comment
itsallgrand Posted July 30, 2013 Share Posted July 30, 2013 Unreasonable little bouts of irritability today. C'mon vacation, get here already! So need it. Link to comment
Rjones91 Posted August 3, 2013 Share Posted August 3, 2013 I feel like an idiot for answering her phone calls throughout the day knowing I don't hear from her after 5pm or on the weekends. I feel like an idiot for believing her when she told me that she is not involved back with her previous lying and cheating ex from 3yrs ago when I know for a Fact that this is the person she spends all her time with and sleeps with at night. I am feeling like an idiot for continuously allowing her to contact me and I respond right away. But from this day forth...my birthday gift to myself is going cold turkey NC, letting go and moving on FINALLY. Day 1 NC Link to comment
hereigoagain1 Posted August 3, 2013 Share Posted August 3, 2013 Hi Loz333, What you have written here describes the way I feel about my ex perfectly. She left me for another man and they have been living together for 8 months and it still hurts, but it's much better. Hang in there and feel free to message me if you want to talk. It does get better! Reese Link to comment
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