CoCo2009 Posted October 9, 2009 Share Posted October 9, 2009 Sometimes I feel the same way you do. I understand how you feel. Just thought you should know that you are not alone on that. Link to comment
Resolute Posted October 9, 2009 Share Posted October 9, 2009 An elderly carpenter was about to retire. He told his contractor of his plans to leave the house-building business and live a more leisurely life with his wife. He would have to miss his paycheck, but he needed to retire. They would get by. The contractor was sorry to see such a good worker go, and asked him to build one last house as a personal favor. The carpenter agreed, but it was easy to see that his heart was not in his work. He resorted to shoddy worksmanship and inferior materials. It was a very unfortunate end to a great career. When the carpenter finished his work, the contractor came to inspect the house. He then handed the front door keys to the carpenter. The contractor said "This is now your house."- "My gift to you." The carpenter was shocked. What a shame! If he had only known he was building his own house, he would have done it so much differently! We build our lives, one day at a time, often putting less than our best effort into the building. Then with a shock we all realize we have to live in the house we have built. If we could do it over, if we could go back and change it, we would. But you cannot change it, the house is built. You are the carpenter, and each day you hammer a nail, place a board, or erect a wall. Your choices today affect the house you are to live in tomorrow. Alldarkness, the life you have now can change. You must realize that behind all the pain, anger, sadness, and suffering - there can be, and still is happiness. It's up to you to find that happiness. Whenever I find myself getting too stressed out, I remind myself that life is an incredible gift. Each day, in fact, is special and unique; none is more important than others. We are here for a parenthesis in eternity. Why not spend less time and energy wishing we were something else? Instead, we should spend more time and energy making every day all it can be. Heres what I want you to try to do -You don't have to, I'm just making a suggestion for you. Every day, or maybe once a week if its too hard, praise, or try to give a true, sincere compliment from the heart to someone. You'd be surprised how good it makes you feel when you make some one else happy. The only true compliment I've ever been given was about 7 months ago someone said "I respect how truly patient you are, its almost amazing" I remember his face, his tone of voice, and even where we were standing in the building. I have not forgotten the simple words. If you do ten things in a day and nine of them go well, which one are you likely to talk about during dinner? Almost always we choose to discuss the worst parts of our day. It's almost like we're setting ourselves up to be miserable. Our continual focus on what's missing, what's wrong, or how we need to be even better or get more done keeps us from being happy now. If what I mentioned before is too far of a step try this instead. Think more about what's right with your life than what's wrong. Start each morning by waking up thinking of at least three things you are grateful for. If possible, write these down in a journal or on a sheet of paper. You feel much better when you stop focusing on whats wrong with you, but on something you like about yourself instead. These are just very small steps, baby steps if you will, to happiness, Alldarkness. But they are steps. No matter how small, it is still movement to a happier you. I am here to tell you I want to see you happy, Alldarkness. Everyone here who is trying to help, myself included has the same goal in mind. We want to see you climb out of your rut. We want to see the only person who truly matters in your life, yourself, to be happy as I am sure you once were. I hope your doing well today, I am still thinking about you. Best Wishes. -Resolute Link to comment
Amberelise Posted October 9, 2009 Share Posted October 9, 2009 And, Darkness, baby step #1 was coming here looking for support. You're moving in the right direction. Are you feeling any better today? Link to comment
AllDarkness Posted October 11, 2009 Author Share Posted October 11, 2009 I thought about this and this is probably going to be the last post I'll ever post. A person once said that people don't like negative people which made me think that I am actually pretty negative person. I see now that everything is my own fault and that life is only suffering to me. Life is like any other topic: It is all about opinions. Some people hate living other people loves it. I hate it. That is my opinion. So I thought about this and I believe that death is a better relief than any other med or stuff like that. Why is it that we want so much to live? We are going to die anyway, and we are going to suffer in the process. We grow old and with time our body functions stops working one at a time. Why is it that we want to go to that point?? I don't want to go to that point. Life was never gift...It was a curse! I hope that those people who loves life will keep loving it and have a happy life. I have no intention of going on. At the end, I want to thank all you people who actually tried to "convince" me that it is possible to enjoy life. I know that when I am gone none of you will really remember me because none of you really knew me and even if you did you would still forget about me because: Life goes on! It has to go on! In the end we are all just pawns in the puzzle of life. AllDarkness Link to comment
TechResQ Posted October 11, 2009 Share Posted October 11, 2009 I hope to God you will re-think what you are considering doing. No one can MAKE you do anything, or feel a certain way. The choice really is yours. I for one hope you choose life. Link to comment
newlife21 Posted October 12, 2009 Share Posted October 12, 2009 see many kind people in this thread, i feel warm... Link to comment
Scorpion Fury Posted October 12, 2009 Share Posted October 12, 2009 I hope you don't go through with it. You're only 19. You got so much ahead of you. The world really is your oyster. Link to comment
Amberelise Posted October 12, 2009 Share Posted October 12, 2009 Hmmmmm. You know what I think? I think you desperately want someone to talk you out of ending your life. Otherwise, why did you post here at all? Why did you come back and check for responses? Why are you looking at your responses right now? It's because you want to belong. You want to believe you can be a part of things. You want to enjoy life and be happy. You *want* to be here, you just need to know that you can be like everyone else. And, you can. You really can. You have to make some of it happen for yourself - be that taking steps to get out and meet people, or seeing a counselor, or seeing a psychiatrist to see if you really have a chemical imbalance, or making friends online... whatever it is, you'll have to make some effort for sure. But, you're right, deep down inside you know, you want to live and you know you can be happy. That's why you're here. Trust yourself. Believe in yourself. Link to comment
dangletsbang Posted October 12, 2009 Share Posted October 12, 2009 Life is a gift. Everyone goes through hard times..some more than others. I went through an excruciating difficult time when I was 14 -16. I hated myself, I had no friends, I resorted to harming myself. Looking back at the two years I wasted focusing on negativity...those are two years I could've spent living. It is possible to enjoy life, very possible. The thing is..life isn't always going to be fun, fulfilling or ever bareable..there's still times when I want to jump off a bridge or just take a few pills and never wake up. I'm a strong and beautiful person because I ignore those feelings now. Anybody can take the easy way out, but it takes a strong person to overcome those feelings. I know you feel completely hopelss but talking to someone who understands DOES help, regardless of what you want to think. You're only 19, there is so much life you have yet to live. So many things you have yet to experience. There's people out there that would love to experience those things with you too. You have to be able to give people a chance though. You came to the best place..we're reaching out to you...all you have to do is reach back out to us. I'm offering again, if you ever need to talk to someone who understands exactly what you're going through..send me a PM. I'm on here normally every week day. Good luck. Link to comment
trezz Posted October 12, 2009 Share Posted October 12, 2009 did you ever do anything with your writting? Link to comment
rubiks28 Posted October 12, 2009 Share Posted October 12, 2009 I've felt that way before. Truth is, you're really NOT the only one who has it rough. I know it's not what you want to hear. Personally, I don't like being told that either, but it's the truth. Sure, no one could ever understand EXACTLY what you've been through or how you've felt or what you've seen, but it doesn't take away the fact that lots of people are unhappy. Join the club. You don't seem to take sympathy well so all I can say is to suck it up. If no one likes you, then fine. You shouldn't have to like them either. Who cares? If you're a decent person and don't have a problem with yourself, that's great. I know it sucks having no one around who understands you, or having nobody who cares to listen to what you have to say. If it's really as bad as you make it out to be, try to stay optimistic. At least you'll have a slightly higher chance of finding happiness. If you don't want to live and you're afraid to die, what else is there to do? What do you have to lose? I'm guessing you wouldn't care anyway, but I sincerely do hope things get better for you. It'll be okay one day; just be patient. Link to comment
Amberelise Posted October 13, 2009 Share Posted October 13, 2009 Hi All Darkness. I'm checking in again. And, reminding you, things will never get better if you sit on your hands and do nothing. Life is what you make it. Link to comment
glegend Posted October 14, 2009 Share Posted October 14, 2009 I found this quote online. "Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, and a shovel to hide the bodies of those people who pissed me off!". I think that you need to accept the things that you cannot change, and then you will be able to accept life for what it is. I'm learning that with this quote this will one of the only ways for me to live life to its full extent and make things work out for me even if they don't. Link to comment
Amberelise Posted October 14, 2009 Share Posted October 14, 2009 I'm still checking this thread... waiting for you, All Darkness. Link to comment
TechResQ Posted October 14, 2009 Share Posted October 14, 2009 I'm still checking this thread... waiting for you, All Darkness. Me too!!!!! Link to comment
GoneCrazy Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 I see is you on here start saying you hate everyone and you've got a bunch of random strangers who are willing to give you a helping hand, which is hard to find since most people on the web are willing to do nothing but harm you, and put others down. Anytime someone trys to help you, you have to go on and put a negative spin. Your 19 everyone has or had problems at that age. My friend knocked up his ex at that age, he grew up in a broken home, his pay cheque basically goes to his ex, and there kid, and through it all hes still hanging in there and enjoying life hes already got a new girlfriend. As for me i got so many social problems along with physical and emotional issues were most people find it to be a breez. So next time your on here try and post something like; " well things werent so great but what can i try to make it better"...instead of; " i hate my life and myself" Your brining yourself down and anyone who comes near you thats why your most likely not making any friends. Link to comment
gsxr104 Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 I wanted to apooligize If I offended you in an earlier post. I know things can be pretty rough for us all. I was reading through all of the posts here on this thread and saw that you have quite a few friends here. Any of which, I would be glad to have as my own. I would also like to extend my friendship to you as well. I've been through a lot in my lifetime and If there's ever anything I can do to make things easier for you, please don't hesitate to PM me. Link to comment
Amberelise Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 Checking in again... Link to comment
TechResQ Posted October 16, 2009 Share Posted October 16, 2009 AllDarkness if you do come back in and check on your thread, please let us know how you are doing...we are still here as you can see. Link to comment
LonelyMoondancer Posted October 17, 2009 Share Posted October 17, 2009 AllDarkness, hopefully wherever you are you're doing better. I've been thinking about you... Link to comment
ayekasong Posted October 17, 2009 Share Posted October 17, 2009 Also checking in. I do hope that you're doing better. Link to comment
Amberelise Posted October 19, 2009 Share Posted October 19, 2009 Darkness, I was thinking about you this morning during my morning commute. I think there have been several people that have reached out to you and offered to befriend you. However, it's a 2-way street. This is the part where you have to respond. What I'm guessing is that you're going to come back here at some point and point out that everyone stopped responding and just forgot about you. And, though I doubt anyone will just forget you, they *will* give up. If you don't respond to these friendship offers, a friendship cannot be forged. And, no one is going to waste themselves on something that does not give in return as well. This is your opportunity to find people to talk to. This is your chance to get out of the funk you're in. You want out of it. You wouldn't have posted here in the first place if you didn't. Now, it's hard because you've gone so many days without responding to this thread. How do you come back now? Especially after being called out on it? You either 1. man up, swallow your pride and come back and post in this thread right now, or 2. make a new username and start over. Good luck. Link to comment
metrogirl Posted October 24, 2009 Share Posted October 24, 2009 Checking in like the others to see if you are still wanting to talk it out? Link to comment
dangletsbang Posted November 2, 2009 Share Posted November 2, 2009 Hope you're doing okay.. Link to comment
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