JBaker Posted December 8, 2009 Share Posted December 8, 2009 Wow. That didn't last long either... again. I was walking to class at the same time that she happened to be driving through campus to get home. I politely smiled and waved. She also smiled and waved. A few minutes later she texted me to say hello, and that she and her friend were taking a short break from studying. I texted her back and said "Happy Studying Then she texted again and told me she would call me soon, most likely Thursday or shortly thereafter (her last exam is on Thursday). So my NC is broken again. I am now either on NC Day One again; or LC Day Nine. Breakup Day 27 Am I weak for responding to the text? She didn't know I was trying to go NC, after all. I didn't want to be rude. Now I am feeling weak. I feel impatient. I wish it were a few weeks from now when she has had the chance to think about our relationship and whether she wants to go through med. school alone or with me. Once I know a definite answer I will be able to either patiently wait for her to be ready, or to write her off and move on. Link to comment
emp Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 Day 3. went to a boxing gym with some friends, had a decent day ex is still trying to talk to me, everytime i ignore her she writes how shes missing her new bf ( rebound ) urgh Link to comment
crabman Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 Day 3. went to a boxing gym with some friends, had a decent day ex is still trying to talk to me, everytime i ignore her she writes how shes missing her new bf ( rebound ) urgh uhhh, that´s tough.. but actually a good reason to ignore her.. Link to comment
OptomisticGirl Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 Day 14. TWO WEEKS!!!! I have never went this long not contacting him by own free will. I feel impowered. I had the urge to call last night because I was lonely and I said no.. I have come to far. I will do NC. I will. I will. I will!!! Link to comment
crabman Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 TWO WEEKS!!!! I have never went this long not contacting him by own free will. I feel impowered. I had the urge to call last night because I was lonely and I said no.. I have come to far. I will do NC. I will. I will. I will!!! yeah you will! good on you!.. Link to comment
OptomisticGirl Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 yeah you will! good on you!.. Thanks! Link to comment
lonesomeloser Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 Lucky 13 Yup, Day 13. Wow. Can't believe I made it this far. I really miss her though, but she's not in every single thought like she was. I don't wake up thinking about her, nor do I go to bed thinking about her. My heart is not palpitating as often as it was, though it still feels like it drops when I see her picture (I know, why am I looking at her picture? -- still Facebook friends... I'm not going to defriend her) I do think I am healing. Link to comment
bexcelant Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 It has been three months and a day since I last spoke with her on IM. Honestly I wish there were things I could have said and done differently that day but over time, I have come to realize the emotional betrayal of what she did to me. I wanted her back in my life. I knew her as friends for over 10 years. It looked like in June things were really heating up finally. But she met a guy, and in two weeks got pregnant, 12 weeks later married him and told me to take a hike over a stupid excuse to get rid of me. As they say, a friend who betrays you was never a true friend. I realize the utter and total disregard for how I felt. I asked myself, is this what someone would say or do to me if they truly cared about how I felt? Is this someone who would stand by me no matter what? These things I did not realize when I was going through it at first. Now I look at it like I dodged a bullet and you know what they say, what goes around comes around. She is his problem now. She can take her anxiety issues, PTSD, hypervigilance, and her crazy pills and new baby and he can deal with all that. Good for him and good for her. Part of me wishes I still had her as a friend but then well..life goes on. I am now ok with it whether or not she ever comes back or not. Link to comment
paddleout Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 Day 31. My relationship was very short (2 months), but it still sucked to get dumped since this girl and I really clicked (or so I thought). So, today I looked at the only thing left I had from her...an email with her phone number. I wrote the number down then deleted that email. I smiled as I thought about the fun times however brief. Then I recalled the last two weeks where she shut down slowly. How her normally open schedule became suddenly full. How pumpkin carving was suddenly a priority (that one made me laugh today). Then I shredded her phone number and that was that. In any case what I did to make it through 30 days was.. 1) Created a workout/activity plan for the month. Wrote it down and followed it no matter how crappy I felt. Hiking, surfing, gym, running, awesome parties, lame parties, whatever...just stayed busy. 2) Talked to friends and family about how I felt. 3) Wrote about how things felt whenever I was angry, sad, or just confused 4) Stopped trying to make excuses for her and accepted the fact she just wasn't into me 5) Just talked to random people while in the surf lineup, waiting in line, or at the gym. 6) Realized I did my best to make it work, that moving on was more important then staying in contact, and that refocusing my energy on me was a better use of time. Good luck to all you. Link to comment
peanutbutterandjelly Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 day 23 just wanted to report that im feeling much better than yesterday. Maybe it was the fact that i saw my ex on my forum gave me a little hope, maybe it was the fact that we had a snowstorm last night and i didnt go to school today.. i wrote about half of a paper today which made me feel good. i had been putting it off for a few days but made myself do it. i still have a lot of work to do and the sooner i get it done, the sooner i graduate but its been really hard to motivate myself. i have just been relaxing in bed for most of the morning and taking it easy and am feeling pretty good. i really think seeing my exes name on my website boosted my spirits a little bit cause i know he's thinking about me, but i hope that doesnt negatively effect me in the long run. Link to comment
peanutbutterandjelly Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 congrats on your 30+ days. looks like you are well on your way! Link to comment
emp Posted December 9, 2009 Share Posted December 9, 2009 Day 4. feeling pretty crap. desperate to talk to her. shes out with a * * * * * . urgh Link to comment
BobbyC Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 Day 18 Sunday/Monday/Tuesday were really difficult days. Called into work Monday, got lectured by the boss Tuesday. I cried non-stop Monday and after work last night. Today was a little better. The emotions seem to be coming in waves. Still dreaming of her and wanting her to call me to reconcile. Meanwhile, I'm going to continue to try and look forward. Link to comment
OptomisticGirl Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 day 16 I believe... wanted to call him today. Really started second guessing NC today. I don't know. I couldn't stop thinking about him.. wondering what he is doing. If he misses me. I'm over half way to 30 days. And once I reach that I will see if I'm strong enough and if not, it will be another 30 days. Link to comment
Melting Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 Day 4 again! GRRRR I have completed blocked out any of the nice stuff and only remember the bad things u have said too me in the last couple of weeks, unfortunately it haunts me ALOT! I keep going over n over n over it....Honestly wish I never met u, my life was so much better before Link to comment
fentiger Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 Day 25 (I think) and I'm considering breaking it for his birthday. I'm not really sure what to do. Link to comment
lonesomeloser Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 2 Weeks Wow... Day 14. Lots of time to heal and reflect. I still miss her dearly. I still love her. But I think what I miss most is her friendship. Just someone to talk to, even without getting all emotional. I miss my friend, I feel like a part of me is dead. Oh, and avoid the Scorpions song "Still Loving You" at all costs. Lol... Link to comment
peanutbutterandjelly Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 Day 24. Feeling really depressed and anxious today. I seriously feel like ive lost all hope in my life. my life as i knew it has completely disapeared and i can't find anything positive about my new situation. i didnt choose this life. he took my old life away from me. he took all the good pieces of our life and left me with nothing. i dont know who i am anymore. i feel like i have no identity. i just feel completely broken. since last night, ive been really wanting to contact him... but what's the point? what would i say? theres nothing. i can't stop thinking about all the things i did wrong or all the things i could have done. i know it doesnt matter, i cant change them, but i just cant get them out of my head. im worried he's gonna move soon. he told some of our mutual friends that he was moving accross the country to colorado with his ex ex (the one before me) and her best friend (the girl he left me for) in january. it makes me completely sick to my stomach. ive been thinking i should contact him as a last desperate attempt at reconcilation before he moves, but i have no idea when he's moving, if he's definitley moving, etc. i dont know know though. Link to comment
Slick101 Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 ALRIGHT!!.. For those of you who feel depressed/stressed/flexed And every other word tthat has that SED Sound at the end.. FOR ME! its DAY 4... 1,2- WERE STRESSED 3,4-WERE THE BEST!! ATTITUDE!!. Thats whaT I learned... NO CONTACT CHALLENGE IS FOR YOURSELF TO GET A GRIP AND LET GO... IF YOU STOP THINKING ABOUT THE PAST AND THE FUTURE YOU WILL LET GO... THINK ABOUT THE PRESENT MOMENT>. WHERE ARE YOU NOW!?? IF YOU ARE READING THIS.. LOOK AROUND THE ROOM.. FIND 10 INTERESTING OBJECTS AND REMEMBER THE FIRST TIME YOU GOT IT...(10 OBJECTS THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOUR EX) DO THAT NOW!! THEN READ ON.. DONT LIE TO YOURSELF!!...... ....... ......... ......... ......... ........ .......... .......... ....... ........... .......... ......... ..... YOU SEE YOUR MIND WILL STOP OBSESSING OVER THAT PERSON, WHEN YOU RE-ROUTE YOUR THOUGHTS.. THATS HAVE YOU HAVE TO GO BY NO CONTACT.. Ive been with the girl for over 2 years and in love.. But life isnt over.. it ended for me 4 days ago... But OPTOMISTIC RIGHT>>> GIRL YOU SHOULD KNOW BETTER!!! .. you can get ANY MAN YOU WANT!! 3 billion men in this world... YOU THINK YOUVE ACED THE ONE!!!?????????? THINK AGAIN! Link to comment
ApplCW Posted December 10, 2009 Share Posted December 10, 2009 Hahaha way to go Slick! Day 15 of Round Two of NC... Nothing too exciting going on. Just keeping myself busy. I don't have the urge to contact her at all but I do wonder what she's up to. On the bright side I don't have to worry about buying an anniversary gift and a Christmas present for the ex this year. I always hated the fact that they were three days apart lol Link to comment
kt_belle Posted December 11, 2009 Share Posted December 11, 2009 Day 21 I can't help but doubt NC at the moment. Over the past 2 days i have wanted to contact him more than anything yet i was fine the first couple of weeks. I feel so angry that our two years together has ended over something which is fixable. I cant help but wonder too if the reason he hasnt contacted is because of the talks we had before i started NC. He did want to be with me but felt that he needed to be single to work through his issues (he's lazy & has no real job) and that the only way for us to be together was if we were single first. He thought that if we had time and moved one we could one day try again after we'd worked through our own problems (a fresh start). He wanted to remain friends however at the time i told him that i couldnt do that. He said he'd try being friends in a couple of months. I also told him that we probably wouldn't get back together again either (i was really hurting that day and was so angry at him because he kept telling me that there was hope but then later saying that there wasnt). I can't help but doubt whether or not i should have just stayed friends with LC till he worked through his problems? Today is also his birthday so i'm wondering if i should send him a birthday wish... Link to comment
Mustachio Posted December 11, 2009 Share Posted December 11, 2009 Back to day 5... dont know how long this round is going to last. Feeling crappy today, less because of her, but more just because of my situation right now. I had planned to send her a text saying merry christmas around christmas time, but Im just not so sure Im going to or if I really want to. This weekend is going to be tough for a couple reasons. First... it would have been our 7 year anniversary, and second its hannukah. Honestly, I will be surprised if she doesnt send a text for one or the other, but I kind of hope she doesnt. I still want her in my life, but because of her, I have made myself miserable and Im sick of it. Sick of her treatment of me, sick of the way things turned out and sick of the person I allowed myself to become because of her actions. I want to be done with this... forever. Link to comment
peanutbutterandjelly Posted December 11, 2009 Share Posted December 11, 2009 Day 21 I can't help but doubt NC at the moment. Over the past 2 days i have wanted to contact him more than anything yet i was fine the first couple of weeks. I feel so angry that our two years together has ended over something which is fixable. this is exactly what im going through. i really hadnt wanted to contact him up until yesterday... was confident in nc, but now i am starting to freak out a bit. Link to comment
lonesomeloser Posted December 11, 2009 Share Posted December 11, 2009 Stopped taking the anti-depressants today. And thought about contacting her a lot!! Was a slipped finger away from sending a simple text that said "friends?" but thought about what not getting a reply might do to me. I may need to get a refill... Link to comment
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