FortunateOne Posted April 19, 2009 Share Posted April 19, 2009 I completely understand your reservation about celebacy. I too feel I'm missing out on my best "sensual" years of my life; yet, what is life if we compromise our core beliefs. This is why we as adults decide to live a no strings attached sexual life, many can, or not, as I do, since we can or not leave emotions out of such a deeply intimate act. Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 21, 2009 Author Share Posted April 21, 2009 ok, just got back from his party at the bar. it was nice, met some new people, and found out me and him have some mutual friends also. it was kind of bittersweet. while i was very happy for him for graduating, i am sad that he is leaving, and kind of sad he didn't pay more attention to me there. of course, so many people want to talk to him at the party!!! and what else can i really expect? i mean, he is leaving. for the next month, he said, he will be in and out of town a lot, before he moves to germany. i hope i have a chance to say goodbye to him, take him out to dinner. sigh. I did spend some time talking to a cute guy there, he was really nice. but i thought it would be a faux pas to get his number, right? lol. sigh. on another note, i did set up another link removed date. dinner on thursday with E. Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 21, 2009 Author Share Posted April 21, 2009 sigh again..... i'm just trying to vent here, get it all out. i feel sad. definitely sad. i tried not to let him see the sadness in my eyes, i tried to be all smiley and happy the whole time. when i tried to leave at first, he said, 'so soon?' i said, 'oh, i've had a long day.' he looked at me like, 'what, and i haven't?!?!' we laughed about that. then i stayed and had some cake and stayed for another half hour then left. i just feel sad. but what can i really do? not much. i was hoping he was going to say something like, 'let's get together this week', but he didn't. i dunno.... i think i will feel relief when he is finally gone.... Link to comment
BellaDonna Posted April 21, 2009 Share Posted April 21, 2009 sigh again..... i'm just trying to vent here, get it all out. i feel sad. definitely sad. i tried not to let him see the sadness in my eyes, i tried to be all smiley and happy the whole time. when i tried to leave at first, he said, 'so soon?' i said, 'oh, i've had a long day.' he looked at me like, 'what, and i haven't?!?!' we laughed about that. then i stayed and had some cake and stayed for another half hour then left. i just feel sad. but what can i really do? not much. i was hoping he was going to say something like, 'let's get together this week', but he didn't. i dunno.... i think i will feel relief when he is finally gone.... I'm sorry, Annie. I really think he is just guarding himself because he knows he is moving. ((Hugs)) Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 21, 2009 Author Share Posted April 21, 2009 yeah, he felt a bit 'standoffish' to me at times. i deleted all of his emails this morning and am trying to move on and not get hurt anymore.... Link to comment
hosswhispra Posted April 21, 2009 Share Posted April 21, 2009 Upwards and onward, Annie. Hang in there. I'm glad you're keeping all your options open. Keep in touch with busboy, too. Link to comment
hosswhispra Posted April 21, 2009 Share Posted April 21, 2009 Upwards and onward, Annie. Hang in there. I'm glad you're keeping all your options open. Keep in touch with busboy, too. Link to comment
Daligal83 Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 Remember, this is just a reminder that there ARE guys out there that you can connect with and you never know when you'll meet another one Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 22, 2009 Author Share Posted April 22, 2009 urg. got a facebook invite from him this morning to a band's show. he's going to be out of town anyways. i just deleted that too. don't want to hear from him right now. Link to comment
renaissancewoman101 Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 urg. got a facebook invite from him this morning to a band's show. he's going to be out of town anyways. i just deleted that too. don't want to hear from him right now. was he just inviting you or was it a mass invite? is it a show he is playing at? Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 22, 2009 Author Share Posted April 22, 2009 i dunno. i'm guessing it's just some mass invite to a band he likes? i think he's going to be out of town that weekend, that's what he told me anyways. Link to comment
renaissancewoman101 Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 i dunno. i'm guessing it's just some mass invite to a band he likes? i think he's going to be out of town that weekend, that's what he told me anyways. ok, then glad you deleted that email. Hope you feel better soon. Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 22, 2009 Author Share Posted April 22, 2009 yeah, i hope i feel better soon too. i'm just tired of crying. i went to dance class last night and felt a lot better. i just can't deal with him right now. i hope i don't hear from him, but i'm sure i will. sigh. i just need to ignore him. Link to comment
BellaDonna Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 I'm sure it's hard because although he never addressed the part of your e-mail to him in which you told him that you had feelings for him- you still get cues from him that he could be interested in dating before he leaves- and all this goes on while you know he is inevitably leaving. Mixed signals are never a fun thing. Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 22, 2009 Author Share Posted April 22, 2009 yeah, like at the party, when i wanted to leave, he said, 'so soon?' and told me to have some cake with him. and then when we were eating some cake, some girl started teasing around with him, and in front of me, sat on his lap and was trying to unbutton his shirt, and he was just trying to get her off of him, and then rebuttoned his shirt! so, when some other girl was trying to flirt with him in front of me, he definitely was not having it. but then, yeah, not replying to my email about feelings... and in another email i sent last week, i alluded to us getting drinks together after he finished his defense, and i haven't heard back from him on that. at this point, i really don't want to get drinks, i just want to move on. some other guy from match that i had a date with 2 months ago emailed me and asked me out again. after our first date, i told him i wanted to be honest with him, that i met another guy (bus boy) and wanted to see where things went, but if he wanted to stay in touch as friends and hang out, that would be cool. he wrote back sure. he emailed me today asking if i want to get lunch with him sometime. i will say yes. should i also mention in passing that i am not seeing bus boy anymore and that i am totally single? Link to comment
BellaDonna Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 should i also mention in passing that i am not seeing bus boy anymore and that i am totally single? Sure. Since he already knew about the bus boy situation it can't hurt. Link to comment
Daligal83 Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 Yea I think that if you are interested in getting to know him in that way, you should let him know that you're completely available now. Only if you think there's potential with him though. It's probably a good idea to get out on some more dates to remind you that there are other guys out there. Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 23, 2009 Author Share Posted April 23, 2009 I'm sure it's hard because although he never addressed the part of your e-mail to him in which you told him that you had feelings for him- you still get cues from him that he could be interested in dating before he leaves- and all this goes on while you know he is inevitably leaving. Mixed signals are never a fun thing. i agree, this is so hard for me. and now i feel so stupid for suggesting drinks last week and now to hear nothing from him. i dunno. just makes me feel like everything was in my head.... now i don't even wanna see him. now - the thing about mixed signals.... is that i know it means 'no.' and then i get some stupid facebook invite to see some band? huh? (ok, fine, i didn't even go to the site, so i don't know what it's about, but still...) urg. i do want to meet the other guys and give them a chance. definitely. i have a dinner date tomorrow with a guy, E. i'll post here how that goes. Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 23, 2009 Author Share Posted April 23, 2009 yup, he sent me an email last night. saying thanks for coming to his party, some other questions about things that i brought up in the last email to him. then he told me he was going out of town today for a long weekend, but we should arrange a time to meet up after that. i don't think i will respond to this email. Link to comment
renaissancewoman101 Posted April 23, 2009 Share Posted April 23, 2009 Annie, weren't you saying earlier that you were hoping he'd respond to you about meeting up, esp before he moves away? Now he responds and you don't want to go out for a drink? Link to comment
Sweet Venus Posted April 23, 2009 Share Posted April 23, 2009 Annie...maybe he has thought about your email, hence why he brought up the email. He might just be the type who needs to absorb everything..and maybe he wants to spend some more time with you. I think you're making this harder than it needs to be. Go with the flow...and see what happens. Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 23, 2009 Author Share Posted April 23, 2009 I just start crying whenever I think about him, and I don't think he shares those feelings. I just need time. Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 24, 2009 Author Share Posted April 24, 2009 sigh. i wrote back to his email. i didn't want to be rude. he is traveling next week to a latin american country i've been to - he's going there for a short vacation. he asked me what to see/do while he is there (he is visiting an old friend there) and he asked me what medications he should take with him. I basically sent him a long email back about that (long, just because i had a lot to say about what to eat/not to eat, what medications to take, i suggested a travel clinic i like, etc....) then i said, 'have a good trip'. that's it. i didn't say, 'yeah, let's hang out when you get back' or anything like that. i just kept the email just to the facts, that's it. i didn't want to be rude, and i would have answered anyone's questions if they sent me an email asking what to see/do in a certain city they know i had been to. anyways..... i went on a link removed date tonight with a guy, E. he was very nice. he was shorter than he said (aren't they all?!) but we met up, we have a lot in common, he was funny, he just seems like a really sweet hearted guy. we got dinner at a middle eastern restaurant (he insisted on paying), and then we got coffee afterwards (i insisted on paying, lol). he offered to walk me home, even thought it would have taken him 40 minutes round trip! i said no, i didn't want to put him out of his way. but, it was very sweet that he offered. i told him that i had a really nice time. so... we'll see what happens. i can't say i'm massively attracted to him. i mean, i think he's cute, but i don't know if i 'feel' it for him... but that's ok, i guess we can see if he calls again or not. Link to comment
annie24 Posted April 24, 2009 Author Share Posted April 24, 2009 Awwww, E just sent me an email saying he had a nice time and wants to know if we can go out this weekend.... Link to comment
jengh Posted April 24, 2009 Share Posted April 24, 2009 Awww, E sounds like a sweet guy! You should give him a chance. Sparks don't always fly after just one date. Link to comment
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