Why are people so nasty to overweight people?

[jettison]

You really think you have that much power over someone. People make their own choices and they will do something about it when THEY are ready not when YOU think they should be ready. People know what habits are bad for them, they don't need Joe/Jane average telling them. They read, they know. To treat them like they are ignorant and need to be guided is very presumptuous. I am sure these same obese people being lectured could find plenty of bad habits to lecture the other person about.

 

I agree with this 100%. There are some awfully presumptious, arrogant takes going on right now regarding obesity. The overweight are second-class citizens right now that deserve to be put in their place. God forbid any of the stone throwers living in their glass houses should someday become a burden for others to bare. I would hope that if that day comes, people will be more empathetic with your problems then you were with theirs.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

How am I misguiding in my helpfulness? Did you even read my response to WarmHandsHealingHearts that I have had my share of being ridiculed as an overweight person in my late 20's?

 

Well, you were told by a child not by an adult. Big difference. What passes as cute from a child is not so cute from an adult. I get just as irritated when former smokers get on their high horse about smokers and slam them, also that Dr. ??? who had that radio show and told women who were sleeping with their boyfriends that they were sluts and then it turns out she didn't have a very puritannical past herself, far from it. Sometimes people who turned their life around are the most intolerant of others who are grappling with the same issues they once grappled with.

[jettison]

Sure it is. Check back a few posts where you said that it was "obvious" and "no kidding" that your comparisons were faulty...ie...ridiculous, wrong, incorrect.

 

If you just want to get into an argument about semantics then I can assure you you'll be fighting a defenseless battle. I hope you have better things to do with your time, but * * * for tat stuff like this has no place on ENA. Either contribute to the thread or ignore it.

[TheSmilingTurnip]

There has also been a campaign for healthier school dinners

 

I have heard about this! That is an amazing campaign, and I wish they would do it here. The choices offered at schools are horrid.

[CarnelianButterfly]

Well, you were told by a child not by an adult. Big difference. What passes as cute from a child is not so cute from an adult. I get just as irritated when former smokers get on their high horse about smokers and slam them, also that Dr. ??? who had that radio show and told women who were sleeping with their boyfriends that they were sluts and then it turns out she didn't have a very puritannical past herself, far from it. Sometimes people who turned their life around are the most intolerant of others who are grappling with the same issues they once grappled with.

 

Dr. Laura, she also claims to be family centered, but her own mother died and wasn't found until the neighbors smelled her, she's a hypocrite.

[RayKay]

Sorry...didn't mean to offend. I was just on a rant because of what I have witnessed in real life.

 

Oh its no problem Crazy - I know you did not (and I was not really offended, just pointing out that those judgments can be just as "untrue" (though as I said I definitely know people whom fit your description too!) as those about overweight people can be!).

 

:splat:

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Dr. Laura, she also claims to be family centered, but her own mother died and wasn't found until the neighbors smelled her, she's a hypocrite.

 

I sat there racking my brain trying to remember her name. Once I logged off and was doing something else, I finally remembered it LOL. Yeah, she was really obnoxious but I guess she laughed all the way to the bank!

[jmantra]

Reading some of responses to this thread just reinforces my cynicism about this society and humanity in general.

 

For those of who are saying that don't "buy into" hypothyrodism really don't know anything about it. I knew a gal with hypothyrodism, she had a glowing personality and a great sense of style, and an air of confidence in spite of her figure. When she did try to lose weight she actually became very sick because the thyroid controls metabolism and when a person with hypothyroidism doesn't eat enough, they don't get enough nutrients. On the other hand due to the low metabolism if they have a normal healthy diet, they are going to gain weight irregardless again because of the metabolism.

 

Another thing I want to point out is while their are plenty of overweight and obese being spit on because of their weight, their are also many overweight people who are fun to be around and carry themselves with confidence, that air of confidence tends to put off inseucre, immature, and selfish individuals.

 

Speaking of selfishness, how dare that fat person sit near shakashika and chucky, they're way to important to have to share their precious space with someone.

 

In all seriousness though i think their needs to be consideration from both parties, common courtesy, compassion and general decency can go a long way people.

[Entomon]

So Entomon this goes inline with your experience at the fast food restaurant. Racisim, sexism, weightism its all the same. So your comparison to overweight people not getting offended to the rude or unsolicited comments should go in line with someone saying something about your race? Nasty comments all in all are horrible. I think the post again has gone off track with semantics.

 

Come on, if I wanted to berate overweight people, I would have and will not spare their feelings. Where in any of my replies did I make nasty comments to overweight people except for the fact that I am concerned their weight may be unhealthy for them?

 

You people emphasized so much on freedom of choice - so why aren't the overweight people make the choice to be concerned about their health rather than sit and play the role of a victim?

 

I have friends who are overweight - I encourage them to eat healthy, exercise. And just because I care that they may not live to see their children's children - does that make me intolerant of or insensitive to them?

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Come on, if I wanted to berate overweight people, I would have and will not spare their feelings. Where in any of my replies did I make nasty comments to overweight people except for the fact that I am concerned their weight may be unhealthy for them?

 

You people emphasized so much on freedom of choice - so why aren't the overweight people make the choice to be concerned about their health rather than sit and play the role of a victim?

 

I have friends who are overweight - I encourage them to eat healthy, exercise. And just because I care that they may not live to see their children's children - does that make me intolerant of or insensitive to them?

 

Who appointed you guardian of obese people or the obese police? Who says that obese people won't live to see their children's children? I know obese people who are happily enjoying their grandchildren. Who says that a thin or average person will live to see their grandchildren just because they are not obese. Maybe all the people you think you are helping by being so concerned and telling them to lose weight, are actually annoyed with you for being so insensitive to their feelings. Maybe some of these people feel insulted when you think you have the right to tell them to lose weight under the guise of being their guardian. Maybe they wouldn't tell you to your face, but perhaps behind your back they are griping about your audacity.

[Entomon]

Who appointed you guardian of obese people or the obese police? Who says that obese people won't live to see their children's children? I know obese people who are happily enjoying their grandchildren. Who says that a thin or average person will live to see their grandchildren just because they are not obese. Maybe all the people you think you are helping by being so concerned and telling them to lose weight, are actually annoyed with you for being so insensitive to their feelings. Maybe some of these people feel insulted when you think you have the right to tell them to lose weight under the guise of being their guardian. Maybe they wouldn't tell you to your face, but perhaps behind your back they are griping about your audacity.

 

Speaking from a medical standpoint, if I have a cause to believe someone's weight is affecting their health, yes, I will tell them to lose weight whether they like it or not.

 

I guess to each their own. You can either take what I said with a grain of salt or get displeased by it. We all have a choice as so many on here have preached. You do what you think is best for you, healthywise.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Speaking from a medical standpoint, if I have a cause to believe someone's weight is affecting their health, yes, I will tell them to lose weight whether they like it or not.

 

 

So you are the obese police as well as their medical doctor?? Wow.

[Entomon]

Some that require more than a stern telling to that they will die if they don't lose weight.

 

And why should they have to wait to be told that they may die from their weight? Why can't people take preventive measures before they start complaining of painful joints or that they can't even walk half a block without stopping to rest?

 

Those that take offense - do you even care that your or other's health is at risk if you or they keep putting on the weight?

[Miss Firecracker]

And why should they have to wait to be told that they may die from their weight? Why can't people take preventive measures before they start complaining of painful joints or that they can't even walk half a block without stopping to rest?

 

Those that take offense - do you even care that your or other's health is at risk if you or they keep putting on the weight?

 

They cannot stop eating no matter how educated they may be. Some people just can't stop overeating anymore than another can't stop smoking.

 

I know diabetics in their 70's that exercise constantly, but they eat sweets and bread and stick themselves with needles several times a day to solve the problem. One is about to die because she is too ill with heart disease to even have a leg amputated, and it will soon develop gangrene because she is getting hardly any blood to it now. She had a heart attack 15 years ago, and she's still gorged, gained weight, lost weight, gained weight, lost, etc.

 

They just can't help it.

[Entomon]

So you are the obese police as well as their medical doctor?? Wow.

 

Funny - even with obese police and medical doctors in abundance - why do you suppose the national obesity rate is sky-rocketing? It's because people like you who don't acknowledge that there are people like me out there who genuninely care about your health.

[TheSmilingTurnip]

I think it's crazy how many people are willing to lecture fat people about their weight but what does this actually do for the recipient?

 

If our true interest is being of service to the obese, and if our lecturing them is not about a benefit to us of a feeling of superiority, then we ought to take a moment to consider what the fruit of our lecture will truly be and then consider whether we ought to say it. At least, that's what we should do if our interest is really to be of service to others. If we're just interested in serving ourselves, then I guess we don't need to consider what our lecture will actually impact.

 

Thin people lecturing me about my weight and my food choices did not ever once make me yearn to be free of my fat. Most of the time, the lectures, the looks, the food police all had the opposite effect. I bet the majority of obese people who have lost their weight will tell you the same thing.

[Night Pumpkin]

I believe that the reason why people make fun of fat people is that it seems so unusual that people could harm themselves with food.

 

Food is meant to be good for us. It exists to nourish our bodies and mind. So for a person to use food in a way that harms thier body leads some people to believe that person is less intelligent, and people tend to make fun of less intelligent people. I think that is where the link is.

 

People can also harm their bodies in other ways, such as smoking, doing drugs, or depriving themselves of sleep. But people know these activities are harmful. Food is not naturally seen as something harmful. So for a person to use something good (food) to harm themselves comes accross as more humorous than other self destructive behaviours.

 

What is it about being overweight that negates your status as a human being? Why do so many think that weight is a perfectly acceptable reason to treat another person like they are less of a person? Why do people feel they have the right to criticize and ridicule another person because of weight?

 

A person is a person is a person no matter their weight, shape, face, color, gender, sexual orientation. Respect and kindness are a lot easier than nasty and hateful.

Life isn't grade school, people need to grow up!

[JadedStar]

I doubt you would realize that smoking sucks if you didn't have people constantly hosing you down with lectures.

 

Stats on the dangerous of smoking, losing a loved on to throat cancer, or lectures from well intent people all serve the same purpose - to get you off smoking.

 

Lectures never got me anywhere. I think I already said that not ONE lecture helped me at all. Thanks.

[shikashika]

oh dearie me... so if someone came and sat on your lap, as i gave in my example, you wouldn't have minded at all?

 

you say we have to show some consideration..Point out where I haven't.

 

Do you not think the extremely obese man next to me shouldn't have shown some either?

 

where is this 'you think you are so important" attitude coming from?'

[shikashika]

You really think you have that much power over someone. People make their own choices and they will do something about it when THEY are ready not when YOU think they should be ready. People know what habits are bad for them, they don't need Joe/Jane average telling them. They read, they know. To treat them like they are ignorant and need to be guided is very presumptuous. I am sure these same obese people being lectured coulld find plenty of bad habits to lecture the other person about.

 

Where am I treating anyone like they're ignorant?

 

 

Jettison gave the example of family members.. Sure, they may not listen to me, but I'd still try to offer my support in getting them into a healthy lifestyle?

 

I don't think you would find too many people who wouldn't want the best for their friends and family. So yes, if i had a relative who was obese... like the 500 pound man who sat next to me to the plane then YES, i would do everything i could to make sure my mother, father, cousin, best friend, partner etc, didn't have a premature death becuse of their unhealthy lifestyle.

 

Are you saying that if you had a loved one who was dangerously overweight, you wouldn't try and do anything to help them? You would rather they just have greater health problems and die early?

 

Where is all this 'you think you are so great" and going on about 'tofu and beans' attitude coming from?

 

I don't see anyone saying "I think i'm the best because i'm in shape" but rather, saying things like "I don't want someone's belly hanging on my leg on a plane, public transport" i don't think thats being unreasonable.

 

Like I said at the beginning... some people on this thread have talked about how they don't like an overweight person sitting next to them on public transport and people have started talking about people who exercise are obsessed, think they are special, and how dare they speak their opinion or make a comment about overweight people.

 

however, it seems perfectly acceptable to talk about people who have disagreed in this "you-think-you-are-so-great' attitude.

 

Kind of reminds my of my skinny twerpy friend (who has never set foot in a gym in his life) CONSTANTLY making comments like "guys who go to the gym must all be on steroids' or "guys who go to the gym think they are better than me"

 

Truth is, guys who go to the gym aren't even thinking about my skinny twerpy friend... he's the one who's getting his panites all twisted getting all upset over it.

[fnlyfrei]

Funny - even with obese police and medical doctors in abundance - why do you suppose the national obesity rate is sky-rocketing? It's because people like you who don't acknowledge that there are people like me out there who genuninely care about your health.

 

Food is more often an addiction. It doesn't matter if YOU care about someone elses health entomon...THEY have to care about their OWN health before any changes can begin. You sound as if you feel superior and judgemental...that will not inspire someone to change unhealthy habits..that will inspire excersize though...running away from your high and mighty attitude.

[CaptainPlanet]

For the same reason people with low intelligence aren't respected. For the same reason we don't respect some people enough to pay them a liveable wage.

 

People are cruel, nasty and selfish. There is not a lot you can do about it. No matter how 'good' you think you are.

[ProtestTheHero]

I myself am not overweight, but my best friend of 12 years has always been that way. I don't know, I guess I just don't feel it's my place to tell anyone what to do as long as it doesn't affect me directly. A lot of people are saying that their passion for this topic results from them caring about the health of others. PLEASE. That's the same argument I get from street preachers shouting at me on my way to class.

 

It's funny how "concern" so often is nothing but old, inflammatory rhetoric. Fat people have mirrors - they know they are fat. Fat people can read - they know they're at risk for certain medical conditions. Fat people can see -they know what you're thinking when you're staring them down.

 

Almost everyone has a destructive habit. The only ones we care about though are the ones that aren't aesthetically pleasing. This will always be the case. Talk of compassion is irrelevant because we are humans and we have failed to show it as a whole for as long as we've been around. I just see no need to remind people of things their daily activities make them aware of.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Yes, exactly. It is not because of concern over the obese person's health, it is an inflated sense of superiority, arrogance and looking down on the other person.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Food is more often an addiction. It doesn't matter if YOU care about someone elses health entomon...THEY have to care about their OWN health before any changes can begin. You sound as if you feel superior and judgemental...that will not inspire someone to change unhealthy habits..that will inspire excersize though...running away from your high and mighty attitude.

 

That's right.