sweetheart230

Don't fall for his games. I went through a very similar experience. Very similar. I believed it. I ended up getting really hurt in the end. My gut said don't trust him, don't fall for it, just end it and find a good man who will treat me well. But I really wanted to believe him. So I did. I'm not saying he is playing games. But it is likely he is. I fell for it. I made excuses for him. I wound up getting very very hurt in the process. Just move on and find a guy who will follow through.

Yeah but this just ended 2 days ago. How could this happen so fast? And i'm justupset that he was so horrible to me and wouldn't consider me more than an F buddy and he hurt me physically and emotionally and made me empty promises- and now he must have found another girl that he thinks is good enough to take his stupid online personal ad off. She isn't his next victim. if he found someone else then she must be a lot more to him than I was.

The old guy..the one who is eleven years older and hurt me really really badly, and emotionally abused me and used me as an sex buddy. The sadistic one...well I'm stupid and I checked his online personal ad and he deleted it. God I was so stupid to do it. But now I think he has a girlfriend. He wouldn't even take me out to dinner and now his profile is off the personals website and I don't know what to think. He asked me to come over for sex 5 times last week. But then he stood me up for our date on Monday. I keep thinking he has a girlfriend. That he's being nice too. That he won't use for sex. And hurt over and over. And ask for a blow job when she is shaking and scared and in pain. I just keep thinking he is taking her to dinners and at least calling her his girlfriend. Why would he take his profile off unless he had a new girlfriend. Last week he was begging me for sex and then this happened. I know I shouldn't have checked it. But I keep thinking crazy things. How could he have found somebody new already. Why does he think she is better than me? Why did he hurt me so much if he had someone new? Why is she so much better and deserving of his love than Ia m? Why would he How could someome so horrible find a girlfriend? I didn't put up with his bull this year. I told him I would only see him if we hung out and it wasn't all about sex. But still he broke 4 dates with me and now he has another girl I think that he was willing to delete his personal ad profile over. I shouldn't have checked it. I'm so stupid sometimes. I havn't even talked to him. I don't know if he has someone new or not. But why did he delete his personal ad? I'm sorry to ramble on. This just hurts so much, thinking he has someone new and better than me. I mean if she wasn't better than me, then he wouldn't have treated me like dirt and tell me he wnted nothing bur sex from me and then deleted his personal ad profile for her. Why is this hurting me so much? All the mind games, the physical and emotional pain..i mean its worse than when my dad died. Which is awful. I mean how could this hurt worse than when my dad died. But it does. I didn't feel this horrible when my dad died. God I just keep picturing him being so happy with someone. And I thought i felt better and then i saw he deleted his ad and all the bad feelings came back. I just have this awful feeling in the pit of my stomach. And nothing makes it better.

Look, all I'm saying is that you need to resolve this problem. These kinds of feelings are what leads to adultery later on. It is unfair for her and you need to really think about if you want to be married to someone beautiful that you are not attracted to. There are sex therapists out there. Making her go through painful surgery is not necessarily the answer. She might resent you for it, and feel terrible that you don't love her for who she is.

Hey, I have big breasts. And I'm relatively thin. hugely fat? Well I know what to look forward to in my thirties. Guess I better get married before I get hugely fat and all the lovely, slim, youthful in proportion ladies steal all the good men.

I don't know that much cause I'm young, but I took a sociology class over the summer called sexual relationships marriage and family, and it was just a forum for people to learn about these aspects of life. And one thing that seemed to ring true for all of the people is that sexual compatability is almost a requirement for a good marriage. Maybe sex therapy would help you. It seems very unfair to her that she tries hard to please you and it just doesn't do it for you because her chest isn't big enough. You seem frustrated with it too, but it must be very hard for her.

Did you not have sex with her before you were married? How long have you been married for. If it this is a recent thing, that you aren't turned on by her, then maybe it can be fixed. But if you have always felt this way, then why did you get married?

Yeah..he sounds like garbage. Trust me, guys who talk to you like that at the beginning are either really stupid or perverts. Listen to the voice of unfortunate experience. I had a guy talk like that at the beginning, who thought we could be "more" and maybe date and promised me lots of things (who also incidentally told me he preferred girls who shaved down there and that I should do it because mine was like a forest), and a year and a half later I realize that I should have dropped him when he thought it was ok to talk to a girl like that before he really knew her. Find a respectful guy. You will enjoy yourself a lot more. If you are feeling reluctant, trust your gut.

He told me at the very beginning, the first time we met that he didn't want casual sex cause it was different from the relationship he jsut ended "with all the intimacy and everything". So we didn't hook up that night. Later, it didn't seem to be an issue. But if he could share intimacy with is other girlfriend then what does he think is so wrong with me? Why won't he take the time with me, especially since it hurts so much for me and I can't do it quickly and easily? Maybe he is capable and willing but he doesn't think I'm good enough.

But why does he use ME when he is out of options? Why doesn't me see me as more? What do I do wrong? What is better about other women that he thinks I'm so worthless? What is so wrong with me? If he treats other women differently and is just using me for back up then it must be me. He must think they are better than me. It must be my fault. He used to have girlfriends, I think. So he must be capable of being good to a woman. Would he have treated me better if I hadn't been so stupid and pathetic? Would he have not tried to hurt me?

I just don't understand how he could do this. How he could be so cruel to me. I havn't done anything to hurt him- I wouldnt' do that to anyone even if I hated them.

I posted the other day. I need help. I don't know what to do. Basically I was being used sexually by a man ten years older than me. He hurt me, abused me emotionally, called me names. I was stupid. I just kept putting up with it. I finally put my foot down when I got back to college and told him no. He told me he'd changed. He told me he'd take me out. Then he cancelled twice. Finally, I said I couldn't put up with him anymore and he begged for one last chance. I gave it to him. He told me he was going to make me dinner. He asked what I was wearing, he told me what time he would pick me up, he even told me what he was going to fix me and that we would get a movie. He joked around about shower sex, something he knew I wanted to try (we only had sex three times, so it still hurt and I wanted to try new things once it stopped hurting). Then he never showed. No call, no email. I called, he never picked up. I know he was online. No explanation. It was too late to get dinner at the cafeteria, so I didn't even have dinner last night. I was so excited. We talked about it all day. He has hurt me in the past, so badly. I tried to end it, but he kept promising me. He said he wanted one chance to prove himself. God, he made me want it so bad. He made me want sex so much. He made it sound so wonderful, so fun. He said he wanted to teach me how good it could be. I just wanted to enjoy myself, have a good time. I don't know what to do. I can't imagine myself having anything with anyone. I can't imagine anyone treating me good. I can't imagine anyone showing me love and respect. I just can't let go. I can't sleep. I can't eat. I keep crying. I can't go on. I can't think of anything except how much I want those promises he made. I want to feel close to someone. I want to just relax and have fun. He his so horrible, but I still want him. I don't know how to let go. I go to counseling, which is helping a little, but I just want to die now. How could he do this to me? How could he be so deliberately cruel? I want it so badly. I want to experience good sex, intimacy, tenderness more than anything. But I don't think I can get it. I think men were better to me when I wasn't so pretty. I feel so alone. So used. I keep thinking if he just knew me, how amazing I really am, how much fun, how sweet, how funny, how warm and loving I am, if he saw how much more beautiful I became over the summer, he wouldn't do this. He would treat me well if he just knew me. How could he drag this on for a year and a half just to hurt me over and over again? How could he make me want sex so badly and promise to make it wonderful for me just to withhold it? He has done such horrible things to me in the past, but he swore it was different. I am stupid for giving him another chance, but what do I do now that the damage is already done? I am so angry and so hurt. I can't concentrate on anything else. Maybe the right one isn't out there. Maybe this is all thats out there for me. I want it so badly. This is all I know. I've never been involved long term with any other man. I don't know what it is like to be treated well. I don't think I ever will. I have so much going for me- I'm attractive, fun, sweet, talkative- but it doesn't seem to be enough. I just want to move on so that I can experience these things with the right person. I just want it to be right. I want sex to be wonderful, not cheap. But I'm having a hard time with this. I can't imagine it being wonderful iwth someone else for some reason. I can't imagine someone loving me. I don't know where to start. I'm sorry...I know this was long. I just don't know what to do anymore. I am so hurt. The first time he and I had sex, it hurt so badly. I was naked, shaking violently under the covers curled up in the corner of the bed. And he asked if he could get a blow job since he had to stop cause it hurt me so much. I just want to forget all of this. I want to heal..I want to be able to open up to someone wonderful. I don't know how. Please help if you can. I just don't have anyone to talk to.

it just feels so good to feel close to someone. i know it isn't real, but it feels like it sometimes. I just don't think any of the good guys want me. I think I am bad with guys and need experience with them. When I was younger I was ugly, and I used to think that was why men didn't want me. But in the last couple years I've grown to be very attractive and they still only want me for one night stands. I guess being pretty isn't enough like I used to think it was. No one seems to give me a chance to show them who I am inside. I want sex. I want practice in dealing with men. (My dad died and I didn't have any man in my life for ten years, so I'm lacking in that area). And I'm too shy to pursue another guy, and other guys often don't seem interested.

Hi. I'm twenty years old and in college. I was involved with a man last year who was over a decade older than me. He made it clear he just wanted sex. I let him do it- i was lonley and curious and a virgin. We only did it a few times. This year, I told him no because I wanted something healthier and he was awful to me. He was verbally abusive and played mind games with me. He insists he will treat me better- that the sex last time was meaningful and we have a connection. He has said he will take me out, but he has cancelled on me three times. I hcan't seen him yet since this school year started. He has offered to make me dinner at his house, but he wants sex, too. He always tells me how he is thinking about my breasts or how he wants to be inside me. I am having trouble with my roommate this year and I just want to hang out with him and have a good time. I just want to get experience with guys. I have very little. I am beautiful, but extremely shy and sometimes insecure. and I never think I'll get a decent guy. I know I am very attractive, but no men seem interested in me. I think if I spend more time with him, I will get experience with men and maybe when the right one comes along I wont blow it. I want sex. I really want sex. But I want to have fun and be treated well. Maybe it isn't sex, maybe i just want to feel close to someone. Maybe I want intimacy. I don't know. But maybe I can just have fun with him. It feels real, sometimes. At night he asks me to come over a lot,a nd I know he just wants sex. I have turned him down at least sixteen times in the month i've been back to school. He is persistent. I just want fun- and those warm happy feelings you get when sex feels right. I just think that I can just have fun with him if I keep it light and not serious. I just think if he got to know me, he would WANT to treat me well. I know my self worth- I think once he spends time with me and we have fun he will want to treat me better. Maybe I am being too demanding and he feels pressured to take me out. One we hang out maybe it will get better. I am a good person. I am funny and sweet and generous. I don't understand why he is so mean to me sometimes. I just want to have fun. He says I overthink things, and that I am negative and immature and ays I'm annoying when I kept asking what time he would come over (he kept saying he didn't know). I just want to have a good time. If I can relax and not let things bother me, I think I can. He won't be so mean to me once I show him how good I am, I think. Then we can enjoy each other. He says that he likes me and that we have a connection. But I can't help thinking that I might be making a mistake. Any advice is appreciated. I am really stupid when it comes to men, and I don't understand a lot of things. I would be grateful for any imput. Thank You!