andyg Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 I've been looking for a job for a few weeks and have been unable to find one. My mom offered to let me work part time at her bakery while I try to find another job and she told me that I can leave whenever I want for job interviews and such. My wife is all for the idea but the manager of the bakery is my second cousin who I've been trying like hell to avoid because of a sexual past. Whenever I'm alone with her, she tries to get sexual even though I'm her cousin and I'm married. I think working there is a REALLY bad idea but my wife thinks I'm just trying to be lazy because she doesn't know the whole story. Should I work there to appease my wife and my mom? if I don't what should I tell them? Link to comment
ImThatGirl Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 Oh My!!! Go to every business in town and beg like hell for a job there instead! Link to comment
andyg Posted March 6, 2007 Author Share Posted March 6, 2007 I agree but my mom is offering me 15 an hour which is alot more than I've been offered anywhere else. My wife is happy with that money and won't understand if I take a job for less. Link to comment
Jetta Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 Well be straight with the cousin, make it public and shame her. You get to come and go as you please basically so it's an ideal job in the meantime. Make sure you're getting a full-time job asap though. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 do it and do it fast. work there and find another job quickly. do not let your cousin roll your dough and play with ur buns. Link to comment
andyg Posted March 6, 2007 Author Share Posted March 6, 2007 OK, I'll take the job, I just don't see it being short term. There doesn't seem to be much else out there that will pay me 15 an hour. I've had issues with being strong around her before which is why I've been avoiding her. I'm just afraid of opening up a whole new can of worms now that that one had been closed. Link to comment
ImThatGirl Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 Andy, There is no reason that you should have issues with staying away from intimacy with your cousin. Have you thought about counseling? I'm sorry. But if you really want your marriage to work, you've got to figure this out! Link to comment
Iceman26 Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 do it and do it fast. work there and find another job quickly. do not let your cousin roll your dough and play with ur buns. And poke at you like the Pillsbury Doughboy. Link to comment
EllieA Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 I personally think you should have a little more faith in your wife and tell her the whole truth why you don't want to work there. She is your partner and deserves the truth. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 he hooked up with his cousin in another post. anyways, you have to be very strong andy. don't avoid her because you work with her. if anything happens, you need to immediately sit her down and explain that it is just work. nothing more, nothing less. Link to comment
EvaGina Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 Andy, There is no reason that you should have issues with staying away from intimacy with your cousin. Have you thought about counseling? I'm sorry. But if you really want your marriage to work, you've got to figure this out! Read his other thread, he has been recieving oral sex from his cousin while married and doesnt consider it cheating. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 yeah andy. when you start these posts, you need to include the background. everyone is just reading this as your cousin has a crush on you or something. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 you shouldn't go into full blown detail about what's going on, but that you hooked up and then got married immediately after to someone else. Link to comment
EvaGina Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 you shouldn't go into full blown detail about what's going on, but that you hooked up and then got married immediately after to someone else. He broke up with his g/f, lost his virginity to his cousin that night, kept sleeping with her, got back together with his g/f, still sleeping with the cousin, got married to the g/f and still accepted blowjobs from the cousin but maintains "I never cheated on her". Link to comment
EvaGina Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 Either take the job and live with your mistakes, keep living the lie you have woven for yourself, or tell your wife you are unfaithfull, an adulterer, and get a job that doesnt involve you reciving oral sex in the back room and threats from your incestious cousin. Link to comment
DN Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 Moderator note: off topic, disrespectul and flaming posts have been removed. Any more posts like that and this thread will be closed. Link to comment
sophie274 Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 Ok, I'll take a stab at this. Andy, have you stopped hooking up with your cousin (I am talking about anything remotely sexual at all)? You must absolutely stop this if you want to remain with your wife. If you can't control yourself around your cousin, I would advise not to take this job. I'm pretty sure your wife would rather you made 10 dollars/hour than you were getting blowjobs. I also think it is imperative that you start to take responsibility for your own actions, for instance what happened with your cousin and your inability to find a job. I've noticed a pattern of blaming others - you have to step up to the plate now. I would also strongly advise counseling with and maybe without your wife. I see a lot of problems for such a young union - jumping into things, the affair with the cousin, $$$ problems. These problems are all serious, and need to be solved now, and I would suggest you get a professional to help you through these. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 this information needs to be told to your wife sometime soon. once it's too late, she will never forgive you. Link to comment
Siriana Posted March 7, 2007 Share Posted March 7, 2007 Oh my....I can't believe this story is for real. I have no idea how you are going to get yourself out of this mess on your terms. If I were you I would get a divorce, said to my cousin to f... off and started counselling. Accept the responsibility finally in your life. Link to comment
answersguy Posted March 7, 2007 Share Posted March 7, 2007 Andy... Stay the hell away Amber. If I had to guess, she's the one who suggested this idea to your mother in the first place. You don't have to worry about her telling people because I know for a fact that you've told more people than she has. She's miserable and she wants to make you miserable too. I promise you though, she's going to try to seduce you and have your mom catch you. She wants to take your family away from you and once you get caught, she's going to act like you took advantage of her. Did you get any calls back on those other interviews? And why has your cellphone been off? that won't look goot to potential employers if they try to call. Link to comment
Dilly Posted March 7, 2007 Share Posted March 7, 2007 Andy' date=' There is no reason that you should have issues with staying away from intimacy with your cousin. [/quote'] I could not agree more. Link to comment
Dilly Posted March 7, 2007 Share Posted March 7, 2007 Oops, I see this thread went through a few loops. OK, ummmm, Andy I must ask you - are you serious when you come online and post or are you doing it for fun to see what kind of reactions you get? DO you consider yourself a victim in this marriage? in this family? in this job? Link to comment
EvaGina Posted March 7, 2007 Share Posted March 7, 2007 Andy... Stay the hell away Amber. If I had to guess, she's the one who suggested this idea to your mother in the first place. You don't have to worry about her telling people because I know for a fact that you've told more people than she has. She's miserable and she wants to make you miserable too. I promise you though, she's going to try to seduce you and have your mom catch you. She wants to take your family away from you and once you get caught, she's going to act like you took advantage of her. Did you get any calls back on those other interviews? And why has your cellphone been off? that won't look goot to potential employers if they try to call. I take it you know him... Does he always run from problems or try to lay the blame elsewhere? Link to comment
answersguy Posted March 7, 2007 Share Posted March 7, 2007 Andy is an eternal victim. I wouldn't say he runs from his problems but he does usually look for another option to place the blame until the problem is solved. The deal with his cousin WAS more her doing than his though. He could have stopped it but she really was blackmailing him. She's a raving lunatic and a huge nympho, Andy probably needs to get tested for all sorts of STD's but he hasn't been talking to me much lately. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 7, 2007 Share Posted March 7, 2007 andy, i think you allow these situations to happen a lot. Link to comment
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