How do men feel about a size 14 woman?

[coollady1957]

Anna1216} One more question: how do men really feel about a woman with a belly and/or stretch marks?

 

I'd much rather see some curves or a little belly on a woman who's active and vigorous ]

I can agree that being morbidly obese could be a turn off for anyone, man or woman. I think that a little belly and stretch marks are a part of life for a large majority of women.

[melrich]

oh, I've definitely had guys I've dated tell me to lose weight.

 

I do think guys can be very critical. What I meant though is that guys aren't likely to think in terms of weight, more of shape. So when women discuss losing weight they will usually talk in pounds. Men it is usually "she could lose some weight from here or here". It is more about the shape than the weight.

 

They do the same with their own bodies. It's not how do I lose weight, it's how do I get bigger biceps or how do I shrink my stomach.

[yeawutever]

True, but still there must probably be a way to get rid of the stretch marks, that's what annoys me the most. I guess if I were to lose like 10 pounds, they'll go away.

[annie24]

You know what ticks me off, fat men, like morbidly obese fat men, saying a perfectly normal woman is fat or has poor weight distribution or criticizing someone else's weight.

 

I say this because I get to hear this crap from my dad every day (How does a man who is repulsive as him say Heidi Klum has ugly legs?)

 

yeah, I can handle critisism from a personal trainer, or a model, but I don't take weight critisism well if that person is less than perfect.

 

one of my aunts, who is a doctor was telling me I needed to lose weight. well, she needed to lose 50, so I say, "doctor, heal thyself!"

[yeawutever]

Yup, criticism does happen all the time, only a friend and my mom have told me I needed to lose weight and to exercise, but oh well I don't really listen to it.

[CarnelianButterfly]

Losing weight isn't an exact science though. You could diet and work out, but your body chooses where to use the fat from and not you. So even though I lost 45lbs my tummy is still not flat, but my arms, legs, shoulders, nearly everything else is thinner and more toned. I worked like crazy on my abs, but would get little to no results. I expected that with that much weight lose I'd have smaller breasts, too, nope, my girls are the same size, but I have less fat around my ribs, so they look even bigger .

Moral of the story: BF can say her shape could change here or there, but its not always possible.

[annie24]

yeah, there is only so much you can do, and then the rest is genetics, so be happy with what you've got.

 

(PS - I know some very painful and effective ab exercises, if you are ever interested )

[FCTex]

Stretch marks aren't super attractive, but it's nothing that Palmers Cocoa Butter won't make go away.

 

I've never told any girl I've dated that she was fat. Howeve my mother pointed out one day at dinner that I liked bigger girls, infront of my ex, who was already sensitive about her weight.

 

Needless to say, I wasn't happy, and my mother isn't exactly.. "fit".

[coollady1957]

True, but still there must probably be a way to get rid of the stretch marks, that's what annoys me the most. I guess if I were to lose like 10 pounds, they'll go away.

 

It is not likely that the stretch marks will go away Ailec. There may be some ways to fade thema bit , hide them or reduce their appearance but not ever actually get rid of them. Have you seen this thread from here below on stretch marks? CHeck it out if you have not read it and see what everyone is saying about stretch marks.

 

[Jennster]

Stretch marks are problems for guys too - my brother is so self conscious because he's got stretch marks all over his tummy and sides. His lack of self confidence has been a hinderance to his social life with girls. I tell him all the time he is basically ideal for a girl. He's not too thin but he's not fat either - and he's got that upper body strength. It's hard to convince guys these days too

[yeawutever]

Thanx for the post Coollady!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! As for the stretch marks, I did tried some cream years ago, the first I got them I was 12, and it didn't do anything, no reduction to it.

[FCTex]

Palmer cocoa butter!!!

 

It's in the pregancy section of stores, it's pregnant women.

 

My ex used it when she lost alot of wieght and I'm telling you. It's like silky skin eraser!

[coollady1957]

The Palmers may help reduce and fade the appearance for period of time. The marks are going to always be there. Whats done is done once the skin stretches. The Palmers may help the skin stay more supple and elastic and possibly keep from getting severe stretch marks. Just giving my opinion. Read that stretch mark thread and you will see that most people agree that they are never really going to go away.

[Rain__man]

Jeeze, it never stops... grr. Girls, if you'd just stop and take a look at the few shallow guys who are that obsessed, you didn't really want them anyway did you? I mean seriously 5'7 and 160 is NOT morbidly obese, or even usually unattractive. I think perhaps more important than "hip to waist ratio" is the "power to weight ratio" The phrase "carry it well" just about sums it up, and by that all I'm saying is that if you move gracefully, you project yourself as sexy, and that is the biggest turn on to guys... if you project yourself as sexy, that's exactly how you're seen.

 

As a 200lb guy who was a couch potato as a kid, I found a whole new confidence when I realized that extra 20 lbs wasn't nearly as unattractive as me being too lazy to get strong enough that that extra weight didn't show in my walk, and any other activity I was doing. Being a bigger size is the same thing... just show us you're sexy, and we'll believe you If you have a complex about it, it's a bigger turnoff than the so-called "imperfection" itself

[yeawutever]

Couch potato, oh where did I heard that one before, think it was on a a shirt where it had a drawing of a guy watching T.V. On the drawing it say that he got "french fried by his ex g/f" and it showed a real potato couch.

 

No offense meant by the way, just the shirt I got reminded of.

[AwdreeHpburn]

just show us you're sexy, and we'll believe you If you have a complex about it, it's a bigger turnoff than the so-called "imperfection" itself

 

 

Ya know Rain Man - that's a really good point. Sell it you say....I get it. But I think part of the problem lies in belief in the product. If you don't have the belief to back it up, you can't sell it, yeh?

[CarnelianButterfly]

Palmer cocoa butter!!!

 

It's in the pregancy section of stores, it's pregnant women.

 

My ex used it when she lost alot of wieght and I'm telling you. It's like silky skin eraser!

I used that on my skin in the winter, it works OK, but the marks are still there. I think it has more to do with skin type than anything. My scars are noticeable because they lack pigmentation and no amount of creams or tanning will change that, only time and my body's natural healing.

[Luck of the Irish]

Uhhh where are the MEN's replies to this thread???

 

Don't feel bad about a 14. I wear a size 34!

[MollyElise]

I think that alot of men who will only date women say size 6 or smaller are making that decision primarily from social pressure, you see the anti-fat attitude much more in the "upper" class than you do in the middle or lower classes.

 

I recently moved to the Washington DC area, which is full of highly motivated and ambitious people. I have heard and read about that it is almost impossible to get a date here if you are a woman and not thin, I have also heard the complaint that you can't get a date if you are a man and do not drive a very expensive car and are able to afford an expensive lifestyle. There is an absurd amount of materialism here, which is totally odd to me as neither me nor my husband are very materialistic nor do we put much emphasis on physical beauty.

 

I have always found it very telling that in the 17th and 18th centuries being overweight was considered to be the ideal beauty, primarily because it displayed that you had an excess of food, when food was scarce. Similarily, white skin was attractive b/c it meant you didn't have to spend alot of time in the sun working, thereforeeee were not of the working class.

 

Now for most Americans a lack of supply of food is not an issue, other signs of beauty have evolved that basically give tell-tale signs that someone lives a priviliged life. Fact - obesity is most prevelant in poorer communities. Thinness is linked in the societal mind with wealth/class, as is having a tan, tans are not healthy, but by having one you give the subconscious clue that you have plenty of leisure time to spend in the outdoors.

 

I have also always found it interesting that coture and other very expensive clothing rarely comes larger than a size 10.

[lostNspace]

It's all about proportion. Technically, I'm overweight at my current 180 pounds on a 5'-8" frame. But, I wear a size 12 (and no, don't look like a sausage). Most people are amazed to find out how much I weigh. I agree to what is said above - it's how you carry it - and a lot is just genetic. I weighed 100 pounds at age 20 - the most I had every weighed - and already had stretch marks and cellulite then.

[monkey1]

lostNspace ... I totally agree. It just depends on how you carry it. I think I'm about 5'4" or so and I used to weigh almost 190. I wear a size 18 ( can't believe i just typed that). Now I weigh around 172 and I have yet to know what size I wear now. Probably at 16 depends on the designer. But most of my pants have more wiggle room.

 

So it just goes to show you it totally depends on where and how you carry it. I think my old college roommate weighed around 180 and she, I swear wore at 12 or something. she and i couldn't believe we weighed similarly and had totally different bodies.

 

I'd love to weigh less, not just because I could wear nicer clothes, but also for health reasons. I have diabeties in my family and I'm not up for getting it anytime soon. Though as you can see, I've lost some weight and looking to lose more.

[AwdreeHpburn]

I think I'm about 5'4" or so and I used to weigh almost 190. I wear a size 18 ( can't believe i just typed that).

 

 

I know - I said the same thing. I can't believe I'm discussing my weight - I'm so sensitive about it...

 

But I am 5'3" and weigh about 165-170 (ahhh) and am in a size 12. I have a small frame and would be a petite lady if I wasn't so grossly fat.

 

But I've decided to stop eating. Or at least cut back on it. Maybe just enuff to survive. Maybe I'll go on one of those soup diets get so my body gets some sustinence.....

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

Body image in general makes me very sad.

 

From my bisexual side, I fancy/have fancied women of all sizes, so it's quite possible I'd find a curvy size 14 hot, it's all about how they carry themselves, how they dress, etc.

 

Myself, I wouldn't get that big. I'm an American size 6/8 and live in fear of getting bigger.

 

I'm a hypocrite.

[AwdreeHpburn]

I WILL get down to an 8 again.

 

You all have no idea how difficult this is for me. I was teased my entire childhood for being too thin. When I got married, at 26, I was 120 lbs.

 

Damn kids and metabolism change

[miserableme]

Maybe if we didn't watch so much TV we wouldn't have weight problems. Not only that, I think TV was almost designed to make people feel bad about themselves. I prefer not to watch.

 

Obviously men are still going for the larger ladies. 64+ % of americans are overweight or obese. I don't think there are that many singles. I think the majority of men prefer women who are a healthy weight but there are always exceptions that go both ways.

 

When it comes down to it, how do you feel about overweight men? Your answer should be somewhat reflective of what a man would say about a woman.

 

If I were you, I'd stop worrying about what's on TV and start enjoying your life. If it makes you feel like * * * * then don't watch. Go out and have fun.