Issued a final warning at work - I have questions

[RedDress]

I think you should start looking for another job.

 

I know that you want to stay where you are - but being realistic, you are on thin ice. It does take a long time to look for another job that you’d love - and it’s helpful to look while you are still employed.

 

That would be my backup plan. Do your best, try to turn things around, but also look for another job in your spare time. This way, if things go sideways despite your best efforts, you are better prepared.

[catfeeder]

While a followup email is a good idea, I would punch the point by doing the most visible thing possible, and that would be showing up for work early.

 

I'm a late worker, and I put in extra time on occasion just to reach a more comfortable leaving point. This matches my private goal, which is fortunate, because if my goal were to 'be seen' as a more invested worker, there's nobody else there to 'see' my extra time. However, if my goal were to be seen as more invested, showing up early would serve that purpose.

 

This doesn't mean you'll need to beat everyone else to get there first, but rather, simply ensuring that your desk isn't sitting there empty until your usual time would be an immediate demonstration of your increased investment in your work.

 

Consider that your warning isn't limited to getting caught up with your work, but rather, the frequency of your desk being empty is a demoralizing signal to other workers. That has a huge impact on work culture, where your bosses can't motivate others to perform well in the face of what appears to be a special tolerance of your lack of investment. So correcting that appearance immediately would go a long way in walking your talk.

 

Head high, you can do this.

[WithLove]

While a followup email is a good idea, I would punch the point by doing the most visible thing possible, and that would be showing up for work early.

 

I'm a late worker, and I put in extra time on occasion just to reach a more comfortable leaving point. This matches my private goal, which is fortunate, because if my goal were to 'be seen' as a more invested worker, there's nobody else there to 'see' my extra time. However, if my goal were to be seen as more invested, showing up early would serve that purpose.

 

This doesn't mean you'll need to beat everyone else to get there first, but rather, simply ensuring that your desk isn't sitting there empty until your usual time would be an immediate demonstration of your increased investment in your work.

 

Consider that your warning isn't limited to getting caught up with your work, but rather, the frequency of your desk being empty is a demoralizing signal to other workers. That has a huge impact on work culture, where your bosses can't motivate others to perform well in the face of what appears to be a special tolerance of your lack of investment. So correcting that appearance immediately would go a long way in walking your talk.

 

Head high, you can do this.

 

Thanks for that suggestion - I did actually come in about 10 minutes earlier today than usual. It felt good to get a jumpstart on getting my coffee and saying "good morning" to the few that were here already on my way to my office. I was already logged in and working when the rest of my department showed up, and I can't deny that it felt good. Last night I told the bf that I would be getting up with him from now on so that I make it to work earlier. He gets up a half hour before me usually.

[mustlovedogs]

Thanks for that suggestion - I did actually come in about 10 minutes earlier today than usual. It felt good to get a jumpstart on getting my coffee and saying "good morning" to the few that were here already on my way to my office. I was already logged in and working when the rest of my department showed up, and I can't deny that it felt good. Last night I told the bf that I would be getting up with him from now on so that I make it to work earlier. He gets up a half hour before me usually.

 

10 minutes isn’t really much of anything. If you’re trying to step up, I think 30 minutes would be noticeable.

[LootieTootie]

I'm truly sorry for your loss, OP... and I am sorry that your work quality and attendance has been affected because well... life happens.

 

You are handling the sit-down like a champ and please be easy on yourself. Everyone deals with death and family's illness differently... I know in the past, I've become an insanely work addictive employee during my parent's sickness and death in the family where I've had bosses instruct me to go home and grieve.

 

If you ever start getting defensive about the sit-down, just remember your bosses are just doing their job. They understand you've had a rough year but in the end of the day, they're not your friends. They're your employer. Show up to work, take your breaks and meditate, and count your blessings.

[catfeeder]

Thanks for that suggestion - I did actually come in about 10 minutes earlier today than usual. It felt good to get a jumpstart on getting my coffee and saying "good morning" to the few that were here already on my way to my office. I was already logged in and working when the rest of my department showed up, and I can't deny that it felt good. Last night I told the bf that I would be getting up with him from now on so that I make it to work earlier. He gets up a half hour before me usually.

 

This IS fabulous! Yes, even 10 carefully placed minutes can be a big perception changer, because it positions you as visible and working during a time that you were previously absent.

 

Your empty desk is one of the key messages that spoke volumes FOR you, and to everyone. If you're able to skootch in a few minutes earlier and earlier each day until you find your 'sweet spot,' you may find that getting up to use the bathroom before BF could buy you a half hour to an hour earlier.

 

OR, that may not work for you. The point is to adopt the most workable routine to enable yourself to be consistently improved. This is a marathon for the duration, not a sprint. Setting yourself up to peter out and fall back into bad habits is not an option.

 

You've said that you are happy with this job, so you're ahead of the game in terms of motivation. It's far more difficult to right the wrongs of self sabotage while peddling uphill against a job you hate, so keep refreshing your feelings of appreciation and gratitude for your coworkers, this role, and everything else you enjoy about this job.

 

Discussing this warning with your BF, your family, or any friend who might be able to assist you to make your private life more orderly could relieve some pressure and prevent backsliding. For instance, if your injury could have been caused by a lack of mindfulness of your surroundings because your focus was diverted by chaotic thinking or anxiety, then addressing those foundational issues may prevent further incidents that could sabotage your success.

 

You may also want to consider this wakeup call a positive turning point in your career and your lifestyle. It may help you to declutter, decompress, and relax into a newfound competence that was somehow 'blocked' before. If you are spiritually minded, you may want to consider the loved one for whom you cared and lost as an impetus for a new beginning. Tap into the energies this person may have passed onto you as a legacy, and voice a goal of making this person proud of your commitment to accomplishment.

[dias]

10 minutes isn’t really much of anything. If you’re trying to step up, I think 30 minutes would be noticeable.

One step at a time. Going very early in the office doesn't mean a thing. I am 20-30 minutes early because I don't have anything to do in the morning, it doesn't mean anything.

 

OP 10 minutes earlier is fine. No need to go 30 minutes earlier. But when you work you should try to be concetrated. This is difficult. You can stay in the office 16 hours and still not be productive if you are not focused on what you are doing.

 

Keep up the good work OP :)

[catfeeder]

One step at a time. Going very early in the office doesn't mean a thing. I am 20-30 minutes early because I don't have anything to do in the morning, it doesn't mean anything.

 

OP 10 minutes earlier is fine. No need to go 30 minutes earlier. But when you work you should try to be concetrated. This is difficult. You can stay in the office 16 hours and still not be productive if you are not focused on what you are doing.

 

Keep up the good work OP :)

 

I agree with the encouragement. I don't agree that any of us can tell you exactly how many early minutes are 'meaningful', or not, given your unique office culture and when you work best.

 

There are two goals that we shouldn't conflate: 1) Perceptions of your effort--meaning, maximum exposure, or 'being seen' as making tangible changes, and 2) Actual effort--putting in the time and focus to catch up your work.

 

My suggestion to show up early was to address the first goal--the visibility. You'll discover with experience the best time to show up for maximum payoff. The rest, the actual effort, is intuitive based on whether you're a better morning worker or an evening worker.

 

My point was merely that evening work may be great for catching up, but unless your culture includes a lot of late fellow workers, it's impacts will be eventual rather than immediate. So showing up early is your best bet for an immediate statement regardless of how much additional time you invest at night.

 

Head high, and enjOy.

[dias]

I agree with the encouragement. I don't agree that any of us can tell you exactly how many early minutes are 'meaningful', or not, given your unique office culture and when you work best.

 

There are two goals that we shouldn't conflate: 1) Perceptions of your effort--meaning, maximum exposure, or 'being seen' as making tangible changes, and 2) Actual effort--putting in the time and focus to catch up your work.

 

My suggestion to show up early was to address the first goal--the visibility. You'll discover with experience the best time to show up for maximum payoff. The rest, the actual effort, is intuitive based on whether you're a better morning worker or an evening worker.

 

My point was merely that evening work may be great for catching up, but unless your culture includes a lot of late fellow workers, it's impacts will be eventual rather than immediate. So showing up early is your best bet for an immediate statement regardless of how much additional time you invest at night.

 

Head high, and enjOy.

 

True! I didn't emphasize much on this because I don't function based on the "being seen" perception. However, I've been told many times that 50% is the actual work and another 50% is "showing off" (for lack of better words) your work. And it's true that you need to do both in the corporate world.

[WithLove]

Thanks all!

 

I've been making small notes on post-its for the past few weeks in order to keep focused on getting things done. I intersperse the things I don't like doing as much within the stuff I do well/feel proud of, so that I still get my job done and don't feel like I'm ignoring the things I dislike. For example, one thing that I'm responsible for is getting certain things out in the mail, and to me it's tedious and time-consuming. I would put it off until the past part of the day and then I sometimes would not get the project done before it was time to leave, meaning things wouldn't get out til the next day. I've been adding it on my post-it note everyday as one of the first things to do so that this project gets done before noon, so that I'm positive it'll go out in that day's mail. And then, when I see that it's been crossed off my list, I feel happy because it's a task I dislike doing and I've made sure that I completed it. It feels good to see things crossed off my list.

[catfeeder]

Thanks all!

 

I've been making small notes on post-its for the past few weeks in order to keep focused on getting things done. I intersperse the things I don't like doing as much within the stuff I do well/feel proud of, so that I still get my job done and don't feel like I'm ignoring the things I dislike. For example, one thing that I'm responsible for is getting certain things out in the mail, and to me it's tedious and time-consuming. I would put it off until the past part of the day and then I sometimes would not get the project done before it was time to leave, meaning things wouldn't get out til the next day. I've been adding it on my post-it note everyday as one of the first things to do so that this project gets done before noon, so that I'm positive it'll go out in that day's mail. And then, when I see that it's been crossed off my list, I feel happy because it's a task I dislike doing and I've made sure that I completed it. It feels good to see things crossed off my list.

 

This is great stuff! Go you!

[Batya33]

Thanks all!

 

I've been making small notes on post-its for the past few weeks in order to keep focused on getting things done. I intersperse the things I don't like doing as much within the stuff I do well/feel proud of, so that I still get my job done and don't feel like I'm ignoring the things I dislike. For example, one thing that I'm responsible for is getting certain things out in the mail, and to me it's tedious and time-consuming. I would put it off until the past part of the day and then I sometimes would not get the project done before it was time to leave, meaning things wouldn't get out til the next day. I've been adding it on my post-it note everyday as one of the first things to do so that this project gets done before noon, so that I'm positive it'll go out in that day's mail. And then, when I see that it's been crossed off my list, I feel happy because it's a task I dislike doing and I've made sure that I completed it. It feels good to see things crossed off my list.

 

Great progress! All jobs have an amount of tedium. Mine always has, my part time job does now, so does my mom job. I'm so glad you're tackling what is tedious first -great strategy! I am concerned with your comment above that you're willing to do extra work even though you're not paid for it. Are you hourly? Do you punch a clock? If you do I get it -it's actually "extra" but it sounds like with all your absences and mistakes you kind of owe them extra time plus if you're a professional or want to be professional the "overtime" label morphs into "part of the job" if your goal is professional development.

 

I've been on the receiving end of people who are late/unreliable. It sucks. It's mean a lot of stress for me when there's a deadline, extra work, unpredictable workloads scrambling to do the job that wasn't done or done badly and for many years my mentor was a person who never ever wanted to hear that someone else on the team was unreliable - we were all supposed to take it on the chin for each other. And it was so bad that sometimes I just had to tell him because it simply was unfair for me to look awful because coworker -again- didn't show up/was unreliable . So I'm glad you're taking this seriously!!! Good luck!!

[WithLove]

I am concerned with your comment above that you're willing to do extra work even though you're not paid for it. Are you hourly? Do you punch a clock? If you do I get it -it's actually "extra" but it sounds like with all your absences and mistakes you kind of owe them extra time plus if you're a professional or want to be professional the "overtime" label morphs into "part of the job" if your goal is professional development.

 

I punch in and I'm hourly, yes. I'm aware that this method (working extra) can/will cause burnout, but it's what I need to do right now to make sure my stuff gets done. I just started a class at a college here and I have to leave promptly at 5 pm to get there on time, 3 nights a week, which is why I'm looking forward to when our company program moves to the cloud-based one so that I can access from home and still make sure that I'm on top of everything. Luckily, this class is a "math for dummies" class that is only about 6 weeks long, so this high-paced schedule won't be affecting me for long. I've just got to concentrate and focus!

[Batya33]

I punch in and I'm hourly, yes. I'm aware that this method (working extra) can/will cause burnout, but it's what I need to do right now to make sure my stuff gets done. I just started a class at a college here and I have to leave promptly at 5 pm to get there on time, 3 nights a week, which is why I'm looking forward to when our company program moves to the cloud-based one so that I can access from home and still make sure that I'm on top of everything. Luckily, this class is a "math for dummies" class that is only about 6 weeks long, so this high-paced schedule won't be affecting me for long. I've just got to concentrate and focus!

 

No I didn't mean burnout from working past your time clock. I meant that people who are professionals or aspire to be professionals don't focus on the clock or that they are hourly. I am hourly for the first time now since the early 1990s other than a part time summer job during grad school where I think we were hourly. And I still don't look at the clock -I do to make sure I account for my time appropriately but if something needs to be done, and I can possibly get it done -within the boundaries of my part time program (which means more boundaries than when I was on call, full time, etc for many years I do it). I am not saying this to brag but that means things like taking a call at 7:30am when I am on the treadmill and doing follow up work including a conference call an hour later -all before "working hours" - and working all weekend to help my boss meet a deadline, working right after a tooth extraction while my husband was away. And I took a huge paycut for this job so I could telework and do part time. But it's in my blood, my work ethic to work this way. Yes, I probably care "too much" - I probably could scale back and it would be fine. I'm just sharing a mindset if you want to work as a professional. If you don't it is TOTALLY fine if you want to do more of a 9 to 5 job that has less growth potential and less potential to be considered a professional at what you do. I don't say this to say being a professional is better than having a job - at all. It's a fit thing, it's a desire thing. I mostly love what I do. I've mostly loved it for the 18 years plus I've done it.

 

As far as your class - if your boss is supportive of that class and is ok with you leaving in time to make the class, fine. If he's not or she's not it's on you.

 

Yes it will be better when you can work from home. And be mindful that that is often a privilege and they need to see that you will be as productive as you are in the office.

 

I probably have a stronger opinion than others on this. I've felt this way since I was 15 and planned out my professional path. I'm in my 50s and still feel the same. Others might disagree and that's totally fine - all different perspectives.

[WithLove]

Had a meeting yesterday with the couple people in my department and we discussed things/clients. I took on a couple things to do on my own and the boss let me. Excited to show that I am an asset!

[Batya33]

Had a meeting yesterday with the couple people in my department and we discussed things/clients. I took on a couple things to do on my own and the boss let me. Excited to show that I am an asset!

 

Wonderful!! I really love to hear how things are progressing. You're already an asset by definition!

[reinventmyself]

Good job, WL.

You are already onto something, but something I read that works for some is to make tackling all your least favorite tasks the first part of your day (time sensitive things permitting)

Then leave the more enjoyable things until after.

 

Try to view it as a reward system. In turn the work itself becomes a motivator.

Like when you were small, eat all your carrots and you get a cookie.

 

During busy times, I write a list on my desk of things I keep putting off. I make it my goal to address each one and cross them off as I go. It becomes tangible and something I can see. It works for me.

[catfeeder]

Had a meeting yesterday with the couple people in my department and we discussed things/clients. I took on a couple things to do on my own and the boss let me. Excited to show that I am an asset!

 

Terrific! Just watch out for over-committing while you're still trying to get your regular work up to par.

[WithLove]

Just wanted to check in. Since my final warning, I have stepped up my work commitment, and having very much improved my overall work ethic. I have been given additional responsibilities and have completely taken over my department, as was originally intended. I have my annual review in July and they I can always improve, my immediate superior and the senior partner gave me overall good reviews, with a raise. They are happy with me and continue giving me good feedback. This week, for example, my superior (the business admin) is at a conference and we needed to get something done quickly that she usually does. Senior partner asked me to do it instead, I was scared but did the thing anyway, and the admin decided that she trusted me enough to allow me to continue doing this particular thing from now on (with her reviewing the paperwork before it is finalized). This is a thing that she is very particular with, as it involves legal, binding language, so for her to relinquish it to me is a fairly big deal.

 

Feeling good.

[reinventmyself]

 

 

Feeling good.

 

Ata Girl :)

[catfeeder]

Excellent news! Thank you for thinking of us with an update.

[WithLove]

I want people to know that even when you feel dread in the pit of your stomach every day going to work, when you know it's your fault, and you know you can do better.... as long as you are transparent with your supervisors/managers, and you show them through actions that you are committed to your job, things will get better. Have hope!

[MirrorKnight]

Very well done on turning your work situation around @WithLove

 

I know how difficult it can be, and you seemed to have approached it with a great attitude! Bravo!