Tired of this situation

[Hollyj]

I didn't touch it haha.. just helped him put it in his trousers

 

 

I would have walked away when the snake came out. Then, you allowed him to berate you.

[maryam]

You know in my day, the way you acted there was a nasty name for it "c**k teaser* I'm not excusing his horrible behaviour, just trying to get you to understand that how you acted could get you into a lot of trouble if you happen to be "teasing" the wrong kind of guy and he doesn't take your "no" for an answer. You are lucky he stopped when he did.

 

Be wise girl and refrain. There is always time for flirting with abandon and talking innuendo when you have established that he's a good guy. Any guy that pulls it out like he did, isn't looking out for you but rather what he can get.

I know.. thats why i backed off after this.

[ThatwasThen]

Yes true..

I hope i can just find an easy way to just do my thing. Without feeling that negative energy.

Once you get the gurl ballzzz to just tell him to leave you alone (while doing it calmly and matter of factly) you will no longer feel the negative energy. Its concerning that you so freely talked dirty with him with confidence but you are afraid to simply tell him to stop trying to engage you in conversation. Take back your personal power from him. You owe him nothing have confidence in yourself as a person without using your feminine wiles.

[maryam]

I would have walked away when the snake came out. Then, you allowed him to berate you.

You know in the moment itself it wasnt that horrible.

[maryam]

Once you get the gurl ballzzz to just tell him to leave you alone (while doing it calmly and matter of factly) you will no longer feel the negative energy. Its concerning that you s freely talked dirty with him but you are afraid to simply tell him to stop trying to engage you in conversation. Take back your personal power from him. You owe him nothing.

I just told him that. That i dont wabt to say hi anymore. That he should leave me alone. He said he would.

[ThatwasThen]

You know in the moment itself it wasnt that horrible.

... and this is why he thought you were up for it. You said one thing to him (no sex outside of a relationship) but your actions said differently. Please grow up if you are a grown up woman.

 

I just told him that. That i dont wabt to say hi anymore. That he should leave me alone. He said he would.

Then your situ has been resolved all but your inability to acknowledge why this happened to you.

[katrina1980]

I know.. i wanted to kiss. Why take that away from myself?

 

Because it sends the wrong message and is misleading.

 

I'm not judging, I've made this mistake too, and it resulted in my getting date raped.

 

This was many many years ago, but I work in law, and it still happens today.

 

Just be careful!

 

Specially since this wasn't even a dating situation!

 

Raise your standards and you'll be fine.

[maryam]

... and this is why he thought you were up for it. You said one thing to him (no sex outside of a relationship) but your actions said differently. Please grow up if you are a grown up woman.

 

Then your situ has been resolved all but your inability to acknowledge why this happened to you.

 

 

No because if he was a respectful guy he would leave it at that. But i am conscious about it. Its not that im going to do this again. But i still think that i did enjoy the moment. It wasnt all bad. The after bull was no fun.

[Hollyj]

Because it sends the wrong message and is misleading.

 

I'm not judging, I've made this mistake too, and it resulted in my getting date raped.

 

This was many many years ago, but I work in law, and it still happens today.

 

Just be careful!

I am so sorry that happened to you.

[maryam]

Because it sends the wrong message and is misleading.

 

I'm not judging, I've made this mistake too, and it resulted in my getting date raped.

 

This was many many years ago, but I work in law, and it still happens today.

 

Just be careful!

 

 

Specially since this wasn't even a dating situation!

 

Raise your standards and you'll be fine.

 

Im sorry to hear that... yeah im careful. I justed wanted some advice regarding what to do next.

[ThatwasThen]

No because if he was a respectful guy he would leave it at that. But i am conscious about it. Its not that im going to do this again. But i still think that i did enjoy the moment. It wasnt all bad. The after bull was no fun.

 

I'm sure he's thinking the very same thing, chica... and he has blue gonads on top of it all.

He's a creep and you're naive. You can change you but you have no control on what needs changing in him.

[maryam]

I'm sure he's thinking the very same thing, chica... and he has blue gonads on top of it all.

He's a creep and you're naive. You can change you but you have no control on what needs changing in him.

 

I dont want to change him. Just get this over with.

[Hollyj]

Be smarter, next time.

[katrina1980]

Im sorry to hear that... yeah im careful. I justed wanted some advice regarding what to do next.

 

If me, I'd just ignore.

 

If he approaches and starts talking to you, don't be rude, politely excuse yourself and walk away.

 

I would not say or do anthing other than that.

 

Your actions will tell him everything he needs to know.

[Batya33]

If me, I'd just ignore.

 

If he approaches and starts talking to you, don't be rude, politely excuse yourself and walk away.

 

I would not say or do anthing other than that.

 

Your actions will tell him everything he needs to know.

 

Yes that is what I would do. You think you were clear but you weren't -because he could tell that you "kind of" liked it and of course you were happy to engage in sex talk and kissing. Engaging in the sex talk is confusing to him -it's not physical sex of course but you're showing him by your actions you're ok with talking the talk so he was entitled to assume that he could at least try to get you, again, to walk the walk.

[ThatwasThen]

To each their own, but I'd want to make it clear that I didn't want him around me and follow that up with actions to back my words up as the truth. Which would be to ignore and walk away if he tried to engage after speaking to him. Lots of men don't take hints well. Some will even try harder if you aren't clear with them... considering his action, I'd say he's likely one of them.

[boltnrun]

I'm still trying to figure out how one "helps him put his penis away" without touching it.

[ThatwasThen]

Maybe she used salad tongs? 0.o

[maryam]

Maybe she used salad tongs? 0.o

he put it in. I just locked his pants

[maryam]

Thanks everyone for the advices and comments. Ill think twice about talking about sex next time. Learned my lesson.

[Cope]

Hey, to be fair, he was misleading too. She said she didn't want to have sex outside a relationship and he still pursued. Don't give me any "boys will be boys" please.

[maryam]

Hey, to be fair, he was misleading too. She said she didn't want to have sex outside a relationship and he still pursued. Don't give me any "boys will be boys" please.

 

Yeah.. to protect myself from being raped or hurt in anyway id rather be careful. Its also lost energy and time to even start talking with a guy i dont want anyway. But I still believe that i was clear.

[ThatwasThen]

Hey, to be fair, he was misleading too. She said she didn't want to have sex outside a relationship[/qute] We've already all agreed that he's a player/chuckler/turd.[qute] and he still pursued.

That's because she led him to believe that she was up for it if he were to pursue further.

 

Don't give me any "boys will be boys" please.

I don't think anyone has implied that old chestnut. It's not 1950 anymore ;)

 

Thanks everyone for the advices and comments. Ill think twice about talking about sex next time. Learned my lesson.

 

That'a girl.

[maryam]

I didnt led him. He assumed i wanted more. Eventhough i was chrystal clear.

[ThatwasThen]

I didnt led him. He assumed i wanted more. Eventhough i was chrystal clear.

 

You are still not getting it. You c**k teased him into thinking you did not mean what you said. Your words to him and your actions did not match. I'm sorry but its the ambiguity of your "no" that had him keep pursuing. Now, that being said, he should have taken your no as a no but unfortunately not enough mothers of boys are teaching their sons that "no" means "no" (luckily that is changing and home and school are starting to drive that home to boys) and they should stop the pursuit even if the chica is a CT.

 

You were hardly "crystal clear" until after he pulled out his junk. Then he scared you into putting up that boundary.