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I kissed his forehead, oops??

ButterToast

By ButterToast
in Dating Advice

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ButterToast Apprentice

ButterToast

Posted
Posted

Hello peeps! I am a female! A very Single AF female.

 

I haven’t been dating much these past years, and I finally went on a date two weeks ago, with this amazing guy! He’s so funny, he’s so intellectual, serious and genuine. I like his personality and I think we had a amazing first date! We met for dinner, and I paid for my own and drove myself there, and he respected that.

Ok....

So a week later..he ask me if we can see each other again, but to chat and get to know each other at my place. He promised he won’t try anything, seriously, and we had a very great conversation, and he said “I know this is only the 2nd date, but can I kiss you?” I was so startled, and I gently said sorry no. Because I was not expecting that. He respected my decision. We talked for a little longer and after it got late. I walked him out of my house and he said hopefully he will see me again. So he kissed my forehead, and then I kissed his forehead just because I was SO NERVOUS and not used to affection. He laughed and smile and left.

A couple days past, and I initiated text saying things like “how are you?, how’s your week going?” And he responded with a short answer...I asked him “was it weird that I kissed your forehead?” And he responded “no just unexpected” and that I said “sorry” and He said “Lol, don’t be”

 

And now....it’s been 2 weeks....No text, No call, complete silence from him....

 

Why? Was it me? What happened?

Is he no longer interested?

Is he talking to other girls?

Was I too weird?

Should I initiate text?

How should I proceed?

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Wiseman2 Grand Master

Wiseman2

Posted
Posted

Unfortunately he was looking for a hookup. Never agree to a second date in your home. He moved on because the hookup didn't happen. One (or 2) and done dates are very common. Next time meet in public like you did for the first meet, but keep the dates outside of your home, until you know someone.

 

Also do not text nonsense or worse 'relationship talks' or date analyses. If they don't contact you for another date, let it go and move on.

I finally went on a date two weeks ago, with this amazing guy! get to know each other at my place. he said “I know this is only the 2nd date, but can I kiss you?”

....it’s been 2 weeks....No text, No call, complete silence from him....

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SherrySher Grand Master

SherrySher

Posted
Posted

This is definitely not your fault. I am the same way as you, no kisses that fast. This also helps to weed out those who only want sex or something casual as opposed to those who are genuine and truly like the woman and want to date seriously.

 

If anything was wrong, it was the fact that this guy pretended to be into you for something more serious but only wanted sex.

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purplepaisley Proficient

purplepaisley

Posted
Posted

He asked you out on a date, but made the date at your home, so you can be the host?

 

How is a kiss on a second date bizarre? Why didn't you get one on the first?

 

I feel like his forwardness on solidifying a date at your place was a means to get you into bed. His playing "chivalrous" on kissing is smoke and mirrors, and when you didn't give up the goodies, he did a full bail...he also didn't have to spend any money on a date or work at any form of entertainment...he put you to task on that.

 

He kissed your forehead. How is it that you doing the same thing in return is somehow a deal-breaker, strange, or worthy of judgement? Why are you fretting over reciprocating the exact same act of affection?

 

Did you find his forehead kiss to be strange or a turn-off, and is this why your reciprocating the same act is causing you anxiety?

 

Did you expect or want him to kiss your lips, even though you explicitly expressed that date #2 was too soon for that?

 

I'm so lost.

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catfeeder Grand Master

catfeeder

Posted
Posted

The guy pushed for 2nd date to be at your place, and you were okay with that? Why?

 

The only thing you did wrong was to accept a 2nd date with him at all after that.

 

A guy who won't keep your dates public has nothing of value to offer you. He's looking for a hookup regardless of what he says, and by going along with that, your message is that you're either too dense to recognize his crude overstep or you're on board for the hookup. Either message won't turn out well.

 

You're lucky that this stranger didn't turn forceful inside your home or drug your drink. He merely tried to bait you with a kiss and regarded you as a waste of time after you didn't go sexual with him.

 

No loss to you, but learn the lesson. Anyone who pushes for privacy early isn't dating for the same kind of relationship you want to have, so nothing good can come from indulging him.

 

Head high.

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DanZee Grand Master

DanZee

Posted
Posted

Just a word of advice to anyone reading this thread: keep your dates public until you get to know the other person. When you're in private, anything can happen. Also inviting someone to your place always raises the expectation of sex or at least fooling around. So if you don't want to fool around or have sex with the other person, don't invite them to your place or follow them to theirs. People use to know this, but it's amazing how many posts on ENA talk about what happens while "just hanging out" or "watching a movie on my bed."

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